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Woman Decides To Have Her Own Thanksgiving When MIL Uninvites Her Family, Gets Reinvited Again
Woman in kitchen preparing fruit, reflecting tension related to refusing to attend MILu2019s Thanksgiving event.

Woman Decides To Have Her Own Thanksgiving When MIL Uninvites Her Family, Gets Reinvited Again

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Thanksgiving should be a time of celebration. It’s the one day of the year when people get together and express gratitude alongside the people they care about the most. 

But for some families, it’s a time when drama and conflict are at their peak. This woman knows that feeling all too well, having dealt with her overbearing mother-in-law, who had ruined the holiday for her in previous years. 

Things got so heated one year that she had to set her boundaries to protect her peace. Unfortunately, her decision only made those around her unhappy, leaving her wallowing in guilt. 

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    Despite the festive atmosphere, Thanksgiving can still spark some heated family drama

    Image credits: vh-studio (not the actual image)

    For this woman, the issue was with her overbearing mother-in-law

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    Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual image)

    Their problems had been going on for years, also around the holidays

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    Image credits: bokodi (not the actual image)

    Fed up, she finally decided to stand her ground

    Image credits: Wavebreak Media (not the actual image)

    However, her actions didn’t sit well with her side of the family

    Image credits: roseypaige

    Unmet and unmanaged expectations are a common source of stress during the holidays

    The woman didn’t give a definite reason for her mother-in-law’s stress ahead of Thanksgiving. According to relationship expert Dr. Terri Orbuch, it’s often due to expectations that suddenly don’t go our way. 

    “We think this should be a perfect time, the food will be perfect, and our conversations will be respectful,” Dr. Orbuch said in an interview with Popular Science, noting that frustrations often arise when expectations and reality don’t match. 

    But sometimes, just being in the same room with family can already spark some tension. According to California State University psychology professor Dr. Pamela Regan, there comes a point when families return to the old, toxic behavioral paradigms. 

    “Because conflict is a normal part of relationships, the closer you are, and the more you self-disclose, the more you hear things you don’t like,” she said in the same interview. 

    Of course, there are ways to avoid conflict and stress during what is supposed to be a festive time. According to Psychology Today, accepting situations for their imperfections is one effective approach.

    “Part of attaining happiness is appreciating what is,” an excerpt from the article reads. 

    However, the woman had been forgiving and tolerant toward her mother-in-law, who made her feel like she and her family were the least-preferred guests. Her decision to put her foot down after feeling foolish and unwanted was within reason. 

    Image credits: Drazen Zigic (not the actual image)

    Most people in the comments sided with her

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    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

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    Miguel Ordoñez

    Miguel Ordoñez

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Struggling writer by day. Frustrated jazz drummer by night. Space Cowboy 24/7.

    What do you think ?
    Paul Rabit
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As others have said, OP has a husband issue more than an MIL issue.

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Loved when OP replied to a comment saying her husband would rather go no contact with his parents than deal with the effort of trying to get them to change. He lets his wife deal with their c**p so he can avoid it. What a loser.

    Load More Replies...
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First of all, your husband is absolutely worthless. Why is he bending over backward for this manipulative woman at the expense of his actual family? I would tell hubby that we are NEVER going to spend the holidays with his family again. Far too much nonsense for little return. There's an old saying, "there's not enough juice in that squeeze". As long as you tolerate the nasty narc behavior, nothing will ever change. And what a terrible example to your children.

    Suzie
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I'm sorry your plans fell through but it would be rude of me to change plans for all of my guests at this late date."

    Load More Comments
    Paul Rabit
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As others have said, OP has a husband issue more than an MIL issue.

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Loved when OP replied to a comment saying her husband would rather go no contact with his parents than deal with the effort of trying to get them to change. He lets his wife deal with their c**p so he can avoid it. What a loser.

    Load More Replies...
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First of all, your husband is absolutely worthless. Why is he bending over backward for this manipulative woman at the expense of his actual family? I would tell hubby that we are NEVER going to spend the holidays with his family again. Far too much nonsense for little return. There's an old saying, "there's not enough juice in that squeeze". As long as you tolerate the nasty narc behavior, nothing will ever change. And what a terrible example to your children.

    Suzie
    Community Member
    1 month ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I'm sorry your plans fell through but it would be rude of me to change plans for all of my guests at this late date."

    Load More Comments
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