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19 Y.O. Woman Allows Her Family To Live In A $3.3M House She Inherited, Later Decides To Sell It To Get Rid Of Them Because Of The Way They Abuse Her
It is said that family is one of the most important things in a person’s life. But what if your family members are cruel and think less of you? Do you still keep close contact with them or ask them to pack their bags and leave? This is what Reddit user @Routine_Junket1040 had to think through when she was deciding whether to keep putting up with her family nonsense or put an end to it.
A 19-year-old woman decided to share her family situation with other people online to find out if she wasn’t wrong “for making her mom and brother homeless.”
More Info: Reddit
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It is said that you have to love your family no matter what, but what if your family is a bunch of people who drive you crazy?
Image credits: Buffet Doce Maria
The young woman started her story by sharing that she lost her father to cancer and inherited 90% of what he owned, including their family home. He also left 10k for her mother and her brother. The narrator also added that she and her brother don’t share the same father.
A young woman asked people online if she’s wrong for deciding to sell the house she inherited because she can’t stand to live with her family any longer
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The woman lived with her mom, who, she admitted, was still acting like she was the owner of the house, but the daughter didn’t mind. The situation got worse when her mom allowed her brother and his girlfriend to move in. They both were known to be “messy, entitled, and rude” and for this reason, the 19-year-old wanted them out.
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The woman revealed that since her dad died, she has lived with her mom, brother and his girlfriend
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
She revealed that both her brother and his girlfriend aren’t the easiest people and so there’s a lot of tension between them
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
After some time, they all found out that her brother’s girlfriend (that she calls SIL) was pregnant. This made the situation even harder because now they had to stay and this decision made the young woman’s life unbearable. The woman went through multiple situations where her SIL would eat her food or make her go for McDonald’s, taking total advantage of her situation.
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
Things got worse after the girlfriend announced that she was pregnant, so now they couldn’t be asked to move out
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The woman shared the situation that was the last straw and made her look for options on how to end this misery
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The breaking point was when the woman got home from a long day at her college and work, so she wanted to make her some dinner. After she was done, she left her food to cool of but after she came back for it, she saw that her SIL was already eating her food. This made her extremely mad to the point where she made her brother’s girlfriend cry. The situation escalated further by them all having a huge fight.
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The woman had an offer from her uncle, who wanted to buy the house from her and evict her family
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The user revealed that she’s been thinking about this option and now wants to know if she’s doing the right thing
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
The woman then revealed that her uncle offered to buy the house from her and evict her family. So this situation got her thinking that maybe this is the way out of having her family around, who is using her and not taking her opinion into consideration. A lot of people online expressed their support for this young woman who is brave enough to stand up for herself.
What is your opinion in this case? Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments down below!
Image credits: Routine_Junket1040
People online were quick to assure the woman that what she is right for sticking up for her
Some users also shared some pieces of advice on how the narrator should proceed in this situation
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What do you think ?
Tracy 4 years ago
Your sister-in-law didn't eat those things because she's pregnant. She ate them because she's a jerk. Yes, pregnancy can come with major hormone fluctuations but it doesn't completely override someone's judgment and ability to behave responsibly and civilly. She was clearly behaving that way just because she wanted to, and she enjoyed being able to blame it on the pregnancy.
Zedrapazia 4 years ago
I already feel sorry for the poor baby that will be forced to have her as a mother.
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NsG 4 years ago (edited)
The mum... uses a spare key... to unlock OPs PRIVATE ROOM.... just to allow SIL access to the mini fridge? WHY THE EVER LOVING F DOES MUM HAVE A SPARE KEY?!!! Evict. Evict and restraining order. OP is an adult - she should be free to completely cut these leeches from her life. All of them. They aren't family, they just happen to have some shared DNA. And if she feels guilt, remember, we also share DNA with bananas.
Micah<3 4 years ago
I have never wanted to slap a pregnant woman before. This post has changed that. I cannot stand people like her.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
If the SIL is acting like an asshole now that she's pregnant, then she was an asshole before she was pregnant. Eject these toxic people from your life, but don't take a financial loss on the house. Get it appraised and offer it at fair market value to your uncle. Otherwise, he's being an asshole too.
Raven DeathShade 4 years ago
5 bucks says that the brother's girlfriend got pregnant just so they wouldn't be evicted. Any takers?
Karis Ravenhill 4 years ago (edited)
NTA. Your whole family are a-holes, can't believe I'm reading that this behaviour is in the UK. Sell the house to your uncle, let him evict them, and they'll have to deal with their own mess. You did NOTHING wrong here, you even gave them leeway of letting them live there/move in without your permission, as well as putting up with all of their crap for months. These people have made it clear that not only do they not care about you, they're going to abuse you and it's perfectly fine in their eyes. You're not a member of the family to them, so they've already made the decision for you. Lose the 100K and sell to your uncle, the loss of that money is nothing compared to the misery your family will bring to your life. You look after you, and screw them. Chin up, dearie. And keep us posted!
Got Myself 4 Dwarves 4 years ago
I'm totally with you. My worry is selling with them still in the home, could they claim squatters rights? I know very little about the specifics of when these rights can be claimed but definitely something both op and her uncle need to look into before going ahead
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Got Myself 4 Dwarves 4 years ago
4full term pregnancies and not once stolen someone's meal - being pregnant isn't to blame, being a massive c**k womble douche canoe is. Given how they are abusing the op, acting like overgrown toddlers I fear for their ability to parent sufficiently for that unborn child. My other concern, given that I don't know enough about it as it's not a thing in Scotland, but given this is England if the op sold the house with the relatives still in place couldn't they change the locks and demand squatters rights? I really don't know much about it other than if a person gains access to a property they can claim it as theirs and can take forever to get it resolved, details of what it involves are unknown to me though
Peter Smith 4 years ago
Squatters’ rights don’t exist anymore. David Cameron’s government did away with them. Even so squatters’ rights only kicked in if you had lived in a property for 12 years without being asked to leave. They wouldn’t have applied in this case.
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Lara Verne 4 years ago
I think she should be able to legally evict them? She's houseowner, not her brother or SIL. They also moved to house against her will.
Honu 4 years ago (edited)
It sounds like she can and is aware she can, however she says they will never let her live in peace. It sounds like she's afraid of the consequences of evicting them. However, I don't see how selling to the uncle and having him do it will change that. They will likely still see her as the one who made the choice. Of course, it's not like they're treating her decently now. So I say evict, change the locks, and if they harass you, go no contact, change your number, delete your social, get a protection order if you have to. Only sell if you really want to sell for your own reasons and get full price for it. Don't leave money on the table because you think it will get you out of this abusive situation with your family because it won't.
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lara 4 years ago
Whenever, WHENEVER you have to deal with family over an inheritance GET A LAWYER. First thing, do NOT wait. Get a lawyer. You have no idea how nasty people can get when it comes to "inheritances.' Get. A. Lawyer. And you CAN kick them out of the house. Your age has nothing to do with it. First thing you should do is change all the locks on the doors, have two keys, one on you and one at work. Then pack up their stuff and put it on the street. Your dad left this house to you, not anyone else.
Randolph Croft 4 years ago
A lot of people on Reddit are stridently telling her to keep the house. It's in London, it's old, it's worth a lot of money, but... Old houses in London are a LOT of money to keep up. I've participated in that more than once. They're lovely, some of them, but they're damned expensive. She's miserable, crying and sad all the f'ing time. People can die from that, btw. I've buried a couple in my time. And not suicide - alcohol and other drugs. People lose jobs that way, too. Seriously, sell it for 2.4 million and buy yourself a nice little flat near where you want to live.
Wilf 4 years ago
Maybe that's true, but property is going mad in London at the moment. She should be selling on the open makert. The idea you would sell a house in London for less than it is worth at the moment is absolutely laughable. Demand is way outstripping demand- she would likely sell it for above the asking price in the space of a few days. We sold our house a few months ago and we got almost 20 percent over the asking price due to people wanting to buy it getting in to a sealed-bid bidding war. The Uncle sounds like he's trying to pull a fast one on a vulnerable girl.
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Cecily Holland 4 years ago
Wouldn’t happen here. My MIL has a lifetime tenancy on our property. It was put in place to stop her kids throwing her if her ex went first which he did. I inherited the 1/2 acre block with two houses along with my other half and she was in our place. First I blew a 1cm aneurysm and it and the high BP were blamed on second hand smoke but would she stop smoking inside. A year later her son, my other half was diagnosed with Chrons and everybody was banned from smoking near him. His bitch of a mother I caught smoking inside the day after he came home from 3 weeks in the icu. Threaten him or his health and I turn into a monster. I tossed his mother out of the house and banished her to her idiot daughters place down the back. Your SIL is a petty self entitled jerk and you need to learn to say no and MEAN it.
Katinka Min 4 years ago
The person I feel most sorry for is the unborn child. What a hellish set of parents to be born to. NTA. They maake you miserable, they are not moving out, sell the house and be free. I'd sell it to the uncle tbh, so it stays in the family, but I am rather sentimental in that respect.
steven mayes 4 years ago
If your uncle is low balling you by $100,000 on the value of the house please don't take his offer. He's taking advantage of your situation. You will regret it later.
Marvelous Rex 4 years ago
So the article title says 3.3 mil but then she says it's worth 2.5 mil and the uncle would buy it for a 100k loss to her. So first off, I would not sell it until I got a real idea of what the value is. If the uncle is trying screw her over by undercutting the actual value just to "help her out" then he's as big of a POS as the others. First and foremost, get the ball rolling on evicting them and make sure to document everything. They sound vindictive enough to start tearing things up, if not stealing things on their way out. If the uncle is being reasonable, then it's great to allow him to keep it in the family. If he's trying to take advantage, then eff him. Get as much as you can and cut ties with all of them. My family has dealt with truly awful money hungry relatives on both sides of the family after grandparents passed away within the last 5 years, including an aunt who sued the trust for no defensible reason. So I completely sympathize with the OP.
rabbitsrabbit 4 years ago
When SIL gives birth, it will become 'how can you evict a young mother n a baby??' They r determined to mooch off OP - if she doesnt nip it in the bud now, she will nvr get rid of them.
Paula Thomas 4 years ago
I'd really like an update. I hope she broke free of that toxic relationship with her mother. I can't imagine sabotaging my own daughter. I'd never side with others against my daughter and I wouldn't allow them to take advantage of her either!
buttonpusher 4 years ago (edited)
I don't buy into the whole "blood is thicker than water" crap. If someone is a s**t I'll have nothing to do with them, related or not. I don't see my extended family much on either side. They were always falling out over money and inheritance when I was growing up. I would sell up, move elsewhere and cut ties with them. They're just using her as a meal ticket and there's obvious resentment and jealousy there. I would LOVE to have that sort of inheritance. The security of owning my own place would be a dream come true for me.
Catherine Graffham 4 years ago
The actual Bible passage it’s based on says “the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” so it literally means the exact opposite of how people use it. It means that people you have a covenant with i.e. friends or chosen family can be closer to you than family. Of course if your family aren’t monsters you can have a covenant with them too, but it isn’t a given that you have to like or accept them just because they’re family
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Gregg Long 4 years ago
The fact that you are even questioning yourself about this reveals that you are suffering from psychological abuse. Hire some personal security guards, block them from entering the house, throw their stuff out on the street and change the locks.
Michelle C 4 years ago
WITAF!?! They're living off you and taking advantage of you! I would evict the sh*t out of all of them and not let those assholes force you into an escape plan. Your mom has health problems it's not your problem, if she needed real help then she shouldn't have been an ass...you might breakup a young family, again not your problem...your brother shouldn't have knocked someone up while knowing that he can't support the family HE created. One thing I have learned over the years is to not enable bad behavior and don't sacrifice your wellbeing, push the bird out of the nest and it will eventually learn to fly. Usually parents are the ones doing this but who says you can't?? And after you evict them have them trespassed so they can't step foot on your property, and if that doesn't work get a restraining order.
Alexandra Prytkova 2 years ago
I'm sorry, but eating EVERYTHING around you when pregnant is seriously bad for the baby. Like, a healthy weight is adamant to have a child with less health issues. She's a selfish moron...
RandomPanda 3 years ago
I’m getting a vibe here that the mum might like the sister-in-law more then her own daughter…
Juliette Dauterive 4 years ago
My brother gave me the good advice one time: never make a big change in the middle of a crisis. Get through Italy and then decide whether or not you still want to make the change. Don't be coerced into selling the house. You can find and rent to a couple of roommates that would treat you better and give you income.
Rcath 4 years ago
We need an update! I hope everything goes well for you, and you can find a moral and ethical way to get out of this abusive living situation. Best wishes to you, young lady. Please keep your Bored Panda fans updated!
Wandaluzt 3 years ago
They did not post this here. They posted it on Reddit a year ago. They wouldn't even know it was copy and pasted here. It tells you in the intro where they ripped the post from. So she's not a bored Panda user and is not going to keep you updated...
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Geistermoor 4 years ago
Maybe this is too simple, but why can't you change locks? This way nobody can enter your room - as a first step. On the long run, as stated by others already, you should find someone who pays a fair price for the house. Such a big house can be a burden, so in my oppinion you would benefit more from the money instead of the house.
Beverly Fitch 4 years ago
Family is the most important thing in life to me. That being said, so is love, honor, and respect. None of which is given to you by these moochers. Your father said what he wanted and I am sure he meant it. He wanted "you" to have the house, not your mother or your brother. They got, what they got. The house is yours. Stand up for yourself. The courts will take you seriously because you are the owner, not a tenant or moocher. Get a lawyer and have them evicted and the change the locks on the house the moment the sheriff gets there to make them leave. If you feel absolutely terrible, selling a $3.3M minus $100K is not a bad prospect, but take another $100K and buy your mom a small house, maybe even a fixer-upper or a Sheriff's auction house and then you can sleep nights knowing they are sleeping indoors but away from you. So many wonderful options that do not include being abused, and ending with peace of mind. But either way, please know you are in the right to have peace.
Piri Carroll 4 years ago
They sound jealous because op is young and got the house. Awful troglodytes.
Andy Hinds 4 years ago
I have just had my will written out and I have left my mother, my brother and eldest of my two sisters out of it because they are toxic people whom I have no time for. All this stuff about families being important is bullshit as far as I'm concerned because we were never close growing up. It's a long story but needless to say: I'm better off without them. I haven't spoken to my mother for 14 years and similar for my brother and sister from the same father because their presence is just annoying.
Anna Harding 4 years ago
The dad who passed away clearly knew what these people were like and that's why he didn't leave the house to them.
Rhonda Gatins-Martinez 4 years ago
i would not sell the home thats been in your fathers family so very long....i would get a lawyer and start proceddings to evict that selfish family.....pregnancy doesnt give one a free pass to act like a selfish a hole....nor should you tolerate being treated like crap....and i think your uncle shouldnt offer to buy home unless you need $ ...he shouldve offered to help with your situation with your family......get them out serve them restraining orders as im sure after you evict it will get ugly .....i think keeping a home that was left to you by your father as it was his wishes that you get it seem to be the right path....hope things get better for you
Random Anon 4 years ago
Just kick them out. I get the family angle but really what is the point anyway. Blood or not asshats will be asshats. Just because you're related suddenly that is okay? That doesn't happen in my books. Bottomline, if you can live with a decision and it's a decision made in clear conscience, screw 'em.
MaryLaure Albini 4 years ago
It sounds like mom, brother and silly are jealous because of the inheritance and taking it out on op.
Carol Emory 4 years ago
Don't feel bad about anything. No matter what you do, they will blame you for their sh*tty lives because that's what a**holes do. It's everyone else's fault why they are treated so badly. They never see it as being a consequence of their own actions. They are bullies and moochers. Take the Uncle's offer and kick them to the curb.
Henrik Lukas 4 years ago
Sister in law is acting like she a dog. Sure, dogs might eat your stuff if you leave it unattended, but c'mon.. Women don't become animals just because they're pregnant.
Pete Häkkinen 4 years ago
They are clearly horrible people since no one else wants to deal with them either so f**k them.
Wilf 4 years ago
Unless maintenance costs are a problem for her, I don't see why she even needs to consider selling the home to anyone! The other occupants have no legal right to live there and an eviction notice will cost her about £100 to get a solicitor to draw up. She certainly shouldn't be accepting below-market offers on the place from exploitative family members. UK property is experiencing a boom at the moment- if she did decide to sell, it will probably sell for more than the valuation within a couple of days of putting it on the market- and speaking as someone who has sold recently in London, that is NOT an exaggeration! She does not need to accept any con man uncle trying to steal it from her! STAND YOUR GROUND.
Thalia Lovering 4 years ago
I would sell the house to a third party and wave bye bye in no time.
Ray Martin 4 years ago
I hope this turns out well for her. Family can be the biggest parasites of all.
Renita McAfee 4 years ago
I'm actually proud of her. Good job. Distancing yourself, doing it legally, and not getting violent. 👍👍👍 There has to be a reason her dad didn't leave it to his wife.
Daniel Sintal 4 years ago
This is more of a commentary on the decline of values and the pure narcissism of all those involved.
Phil Heggs 4 years ago
I wouldn't seel your house, that is your inheritance from your father and you may regret it later in life. However, if you cannot afford to live there on your own, why not rent it out? The income may be enough to support you renting elsewhere on your own, it gets you on your own feet and gets them out of the house, all without losing your asset. Who is to say if you sold they wouldn't somehow get their grubby hands on the income from the property anyway and then you will be left with nothing!
Ezara Abdul 4 years ago
Don't worry hun you are not the @$$h0le,your family is. What kind of a mother would love the brother's girlfriend more than her own daughter? Selling this house to your uncle is rhe best option ever, buy a smaller home for yourself and save the rest of the money.Do not give any to them.they don't deserve it.
Craig Reynolds 4 years ago
I'd sell the house to the uncle even if he is taking advantage of the situation. The house is worth 2.5 million and he is willing to pay 2.4 million or $100k less. That's only a 4% discount. I don't know how real estate works over there but here in the states, you would lose that 4% and possibly more in a sales commission selling through an agent. Also, unless it's a seller's market, the odds are a buyer is not going to want to pay the full market price and you would likely end up taking a lower offer. Just make sure you don't sign over the deed/title until you have ALL of the money in the bank. Do NOT hold a mortgage/personal loan for any amount. You have to get ALL of the money at once, especially since he is family. Family debts are the hardest to collect if something goes wrong.
Mazer 4 years ago
I would have drummed up a free week trip out of town for all three of them, secured a restraining order, moved their stuff out off the property. While gone, I would have changed all the locks and the phone number. I would have gotten a PO BOX for them to use to contact me for whatever reason. Even posted a security guard at the front of the driveway if needed. I write this based on personal experience with narcissistic agile family members., Drawing clear boundary lines - even with mutual friends, limiting access to a PO BOX..best decisions I have ever made.
Eagle Girl 4 years ago
Are the laws different in UK that you can't legally remove someone? Or are there squatter's rights involved? Bc as annoying & rude as the family is, they didn't break any laws? If I was her, I'd sell the house to a friend with a contract to buy then take a loan against the house to install security. Then if the family comes back, laws are broken & legal actions can be made.
Ivana 4 years ago
I was going to say she shouldn't sell the house at a loss but 100K short when the house is worth so much is worth it to keep it in the family. She can even put a clause in the contract that she is allowed to remain in the house rent free for the next 5 years or whatever. Kind of compensates for being short the 100K. The other option is to evict them herself which any court would side with her as the legal owner and then she could get roommates or something to cover the expenses. Sounds like the selling to the uncle would be the best option but I would also include in the contract that she has buy-back rights, meaning if he sells it, she has the right to buy it back prior to it going on the market. Honestly to me it would boil down to how much I loved the house. If I loved the house, then I would evict and just get roommates. If I was fine with eventually not living in the house I would sell to the uncle.
The Starsong Princess 4 years ago
If uncle is offering you $100, 000 below valuation, he might be right - it could cost him about that to get rid of them and he would be taking on all the aggravation. Any independent valuation needs to take into account the eviction. However, my best piece of advice is once you decide on this, move away. Your family will do anything to get their hands on your money. You need to change all your passwords and flag your bank accounts and credit rating. Expect begging, identity theft and fraud.
Wilf 4 years ago
It would cost the callout fee for a locksmith- £99. The other occupants have no legal right to be in the property, they are not even formal tenants. She doesn't even need an eviction notice- she can just lock them out and call the police if they try to gain access. It's as simple as that. The Uncle is obviously trying to exploit the situation. He's more of the AH than the MIL in my view.
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Lyone Fein 4 years ago
Lawyer up. Evict them. Get a restraining order. Keep your house. On the day they are legally required to be gone, do not be home. Hire security to check to see if they are gone. If not authorize your men to start throwing their belongings out onto the street. Do not cease this activity until all of their possessions are cleared out of your house. Change the locks for ALL the doors. If any of them try to enter the property again, call your solicitor and the police. Do not get involved in any verbal exchanges with any of them. If they want to discuss the situation with you, have them contact your lawyer and set up an appointment for you all to meet at his/her office. They can pay for the time.
Lyn Moffett 4 years ago
She sounds like a greedy entitled bitch and your brother n mother are enabling her behaviour. Living in someone else's home you should be falling over yourself to help out especially when you're living rent/utility bill free. They sound like three scroungers and don't deserve to be in your home. Plain simple greed in the fact that she devours everything of yours. Being pregnant is no excuse. Maybe think over your uncles offer carefully too as 100k is a really big loss. Do your best to get them out then put the house on the market. Make sure you have good security to keep them from sneaking back in when you're not in the property. Nobody says you have to love your family. It's a sad fact but this family seem to be out to get all they can off you. If he has his 10k and your mum has hers or even part of it well that's plenty for a deposit on a place the three scroungers can all move into together. Let's see how long your mum treats her like a princess when she's the one having to clear up
Ashley Wise 4 years ago
I don't blame you for wanting them out of your house. Your dad left YOU the house, not your mom, brother and his pregnant girlfriend! There is absolutely no excuse for her taking your food just because she's pregnant! When I was pregnant with my daughter, I was hungry all the time, but I never ate anyone else's food without at least asking them first. (Btw, when I was pregnant, my husband and I lived with his parents in a 3 bedroom house along with his 11 year old sister at the time) If you do sell to your uncle, I wouldn't just jump into the offer just so you can get them evicted. Im sure you have paperwork showing your the sole beneficiary of the house and I would do like some of the others on here suggested, and have them legally evicted. Your mom & brother were left with enough money to get their own place and the house was left to you. They should be thanking you for your generosity in allowing them to stay as long as they have.
Rider 4 years ago
If you can afford it get them a hotel for 1-2 nights. While they are out change the locks and pack all their stuff up in the garage (shed or side yard work too). It's very easy to evict roommates, they do not have near the legal protections tenants do. If they call the sheriff, show proof the house is in your name and you live there (utility bill) and he will tell them to leave. May not be a bad idea to call the sheriff yourself to facilitate the exchange.
Pat Bond 4 years ago
This sounds fabricated. She would have to pay inheritance tax on the house, that would be around £180K for estates around £2.5million and would be expected when probate is achieved. If the story is true, she has to sell up anyway to pay the bills.
Helena Houzarová 4 years ago
There may have been enough cash in her inheritance to cover the tax as well. I'm sure her late father thought things through in that regard.
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Tracy 4 years ago
Your sister-in-law didn't eat those things because she's pregnant. She ate them because she's a jerk. Yes, pregnancy can come with major hormone fluctuations but it doesn't completely override someone's judgment and ability to behave responsibly and civilly. She was clearly behaving that way just because she wanted to, and she enjoyed being able to blame it on the pregnancy.
Zedrapazia 4 years ago
I already feel sorry for the poor baby that will be forced to have her as a mother.
Load More Replies... NsG 4 years ago (edited)
The mum... uses a spare key... to unlock OPs PRIVATE ROOM.... just to allow SIL access to the mini fridge? WHY THE EVER LOVING F DOES MUM HAVE A SPARE KEY?!!! Evict. Evict and restraining order. OP is an adult - she should be free to completely cut these leeches from her life. All of them. They aren't family, they just happen to have some shared DNA. And if she feels guilt, remember, we also share DNA with bananas.
Micah<3 4 years ago
I have never wanted to slap a pregnant woman before. This post has changed that. I cannot stand people like her.
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
If the SIL is acting like an asshole now that she's pregnant, then she was an asshole before she was pregnant. Eject these toxic people from your life, but don't take a financial loss on the house. Get it appraised and offer it at fair market value to your uncle. Otherwise, he's being an asshole too.
Raven DeathShade 4 years ago
5 bucks says that the brother's girlfriend got pregnant just so they wouldn't be evicted. Any takers?
Karis Ravenhill 4 years ago (edited)
NTA. Your whole family are a-holes, can't believe I'm reading that this behaviour is in the UK. Sell the house to your uncle, let him evict them, and they'll have to deal with their own mess. You did NOTHING wrong here, you even gave them leeway of letting them live there/move in without your permission, as well as putting up with all of their crap for months. These people have made it clear that not only do they not care about you, they're going to abuse you and it's perfectly fine in their eyes. You're not a member of the family to them, so they've already made the decision for you. Lose the 100K and sell to your uncle, the loss of that money is nothing compared to the misery your family will bring to your life. You look after you, and screw them. Chin up, dearie. And keep us posted!
Got Myself 4 Dwarves 4 years ago
I'm totally with you. My worry is selling with them still in the home, could they claim squatters rights? I know very little about the specifics of when these rights can be claimed but definitely something both op and her uncle need to look into before going ahead
Load More Replies... Got Myself 4 Dwarves 4 years ago
4full term pregnancies and not once stolen someone's meal - being pregnant isn't to blame, being a massive c**k womble douche canoe is. Given how they are abusing the op, acting like overgrown toddlers I fear for their ability to parent sufficiently for that unborn child. My other concern, given that I don't know enough about it as it's not a thing in Scotland, but given this is England if the op sold the house with the relatives still in place couldn't they change the locks and demand squatters rights? I really don't know much about it other than if a person gains access to a property they can claim it as theirs and can take forever to get it resolved, details of what it involves are unknown to me though
Peter Smith 4 years ago
Squatters’ rights don’t exist anymore. David Cameron’s government did away with them. Even so squatters’ rights only kicked in if you had lived in a property for 12 years without being asked to leave. They wouldn’t have applied in this case.
Load More Replies... Lara Verne 4 years ago
I think she should be able to legally evict them? She's houseowner, not her brother or SIL. They also moved to house against her will.
Honu 4 years ago (edited)
It sounds like she can and is aware she can, however she says they will never let her live in peace. It sounds like she's afraid of the consequences of evicting them. However, I don't see how selling to the uncle and having him do it will change that. They will likely still see her as the one who made the choice. Of course, it's not like they're treating her decently now. So I say evict, change the locks, and if they harass you, go no contact, change your number, delete your social, get a protection order if you have to. Only sell if you really want to sell for your own reasons and get full price for it. Don't leave money on the table because you think it will get you out of this abusive situation with your family because it won't.
Load More Replies... lara 4 years ago
Whenever, WHENEVER you have to deal with family over an inheritance GET A LAWYER. First thing, do NOT wait. Get a lawyer. You have no idea how nasty people can get when it comes to "inheritances.' Get. A. Lawyer. And you CAN kick them out of the house. Your age has nothing to do with it. First thing you should do is change all the locks on the doors, have two keys, one on you and one at work. Then pack up their stuff and put it on the street. Your dad left this house to you, not anyone else.
Randolph Croft 4 years ago
A lot of people on Reddit are stridently telling her to keep the house. It's in London, it's old, it's worth a lot of money, but... Old houses in London are a LOT of money to keep up. I've participated in that more than once. They're lovely, some of them, but they're damned expensive. She's miserable, crying and sad all the f'ing time. People can die from that, btw. I've buried a couple in my time. And not suicide - alcohol and other drugs. People lose jobs that way, too. Seriously, sell it for 2.4 million and buy yourself a nice little flat near where you want to live.
Wilf 4 years ago
Maybe that's true, but property is going mad in London at the moment. She should be selling on the open makert. The idea you would sell a house in London for less than it is worth at the moment is absolutely laughable. Demand is way outstripping demand- she would likely sell it for above the asking price in the space of a few days. We sold our house a few months ago and we got almost 20 percent over the asking price due to people wanting to buy it getting in to a sealed-bid bidding war. The Uncle sounds like he's trying to pull a fast one on a vulnerable girl.
Load More Replies... Cecily Holland 4 years ago
Wouldn’t happen here. My MIL has a lifetime tenancy on our property. It was put in place to stop her kids throwing her if her ex went first which he did. I inherited the 1/2 acre block with two houses along with my other half and she was in our place. First I blew a 1cm aneurysm and it and the high BP were blamed on second hand smoke but would she stop smoking inside. A year later her son, my other half was diagnosed with Chrons and everybody was banned from smoking near him. His bitch of a mother I caught smoking inside the day after he came home from 3 weeks in the icu. Threaten him or his health and I turn into a monster. I tossed his mother out of the house and banished her to her idiot daughters place down the back. Your SIL is a petty self entitled jerk and you need to learn to say no and MEAN it.
Katinka Min 4 years ago
The person I feel most sorry for is the unborn child. What a hellish set of parents to be born to. NTA. They maake you miserable, they are not moving out, sell the house and be free. I'd sell it to the uncle tbh, so it stays in the family, but I am rather sentimental in that respect.
steven mayes 4 years ago
If your uncle is low balling you by $100,000 on the value of the house please don't take his offer. He's taking advantage of your situation. You will regret it later.
Marvelous Rex 4 years ago
So the article title says 3.3 mil but then she says it's worth 2.5 mil and the uncle would buy it for a 100k loss to her. So first off, I would not sell it until I got a real idea of what the value is. If the uncle is trying screw her over by undercutting the actual value just to "help her out" then he's as big of a POS as the others. First and foremost, get the ball rolling on evicting them and make sure to document everything. They sound vindictive enough to start tearing things up, if not stealing things on their way out. If the uncle is being reasonable, then it's great to allow him to keep it in the family. If he's trying to take advantage, then eff him. Get as much as you can and cut ties with all of them. My family has dealt with truly awful money hungry relatives on both sides of the family after grandparents passed away within the last 5 years, including an aunt who sued the trust for no defensible reason. So I completely sympathize with the OP.
rabbitsrabbit 4 years ago
When SIL gives birth, it will become 'how can you evict a young mother n a baby??' They r determined to mooch off OP - if she doesnt nip it in the bud now, she will nvr get rid of them.
Paula Thomas 4 years ago
I'd really like an update. I hope she broke free of that toxic relationship with her mother. I can't imagine sabotaging my own daughter. I'd never side with others against my daughter and I wouldn't allow them to take advantage of her either!
buttonpusher 4 years ago (edited)
I don't buy into the whole "blood is thicker than water" crap. If someone is a s**t I'll have nothing to do with them, related or not. I don't see my extended family much on either side. They were always falling out over money and inheritance when I was growing up. I would sell up, move elsewhere and cut ties with them. They're just using her as a meal ticket and there's obvious resentment and jealousy there. I would LOVE to have that sort of inheritance. The security of owning my own place would be a dream come true for me.
Catherine Graffham 4 years ago
The actual Bible passage it’s based on says “the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” so it literally means the exact opposite of how people use it. It means that people you have a covenant with i.e. friends or chosen family can be closer to you than family. Of course if your family aren’t monsters you can have a covenant with them too, but it isn’t a given that you have to like or accept them just because they’re family
Load More Replies... Gregg Long 4 years ago
The fact that you are even questioning yourself about this reveals that you are suffering from psychological abuse. Hire some personal security guards, block them from entering the house, throw their stuff out on the street and change the locks.
Michelle C 4 years ago
WITAF!?! They're living off you and taking advantage of you! I would evict the sh*t out of all of them and not let those assholes force you into an escape plan. Your mom has health problems it's not your problem, if she needed real help then she shouldn't have been an ass...you might breakup a young family, again not your problem...your brother shouldn't have knocked someone up while knowing that he can't support the family HE created. One thing I have learned over the years is to not enable bad behavior and don't sacrifice your wellbeing, push the bird out of the nest and it will eventually learn to fly. Usually parents are the ones doing this but who says you can't?? And after you evict them have them trespassed so they can't step foot on your property, and if that doesn't work get a restraining order.
Alexandra Prytkova 2 years ago
I'm sorry, but eating EVERYTHING around you when pregnant is seriously bad for the baby. Like, a healthy weight is adamant to have a child with less health issues. She's a selfish moron...
RandomPanda 3 years ago
I’m getting a vibe here that the mum might like the sister-in-law more then her own daughter…
Juliette Dauterive 4 years ago
My brother gave me the good advice one time: never make a big change in the middle of a crisis. Get through Italy and then decide whether or not you still want to make the change. Don't be coerced into selling the house. You can find and rent to a couple of roommates that would treat you better and give you income.
Rcath 4 years ago
We need an update! I hope everything goes well for you, and you can find a moral and ethical way to get out of this abusive living situation. Best wishes to you, young lady. Please keep your Bored Panda fans updated!
Wandaluzt 3 years ago
They did not post this here. They posted it on Reddit a year ago. They wouldn't even know it was copy and pasted here. It tells you in the intro where they ripped the post from. So she's not a bored Panda user and is not going to keep you updated...
Load More Replies... Geistermoor 4 years ago
Maybe this is too simple, but why can't you change locks? This way nobody can enter your room - as a first step. On the long run, as stated by others already, you should find someone who pays a fair price for the house. Such a big house can be a burden, so in my oppinion you would benefit more from the money instead of the house.
Beverly Fitch 4 years ago
Family is the most important thing in life to me. That being said, so is love, honor, and respect. None of which is given to you by these moochers. Your father said what he wanted and I am sure he meant it. He wanted "you" to have the house, not your mother or your brother. They got, what they got. The house is yours. Stand up for yourself. The courts will take you seriously because you are the owner, not a tenant or moocher. Get a lawyer and have them evicted and the change the locks on the house the moment the sheriff gets there to make them leave. If you feel absolutely terrible, selling a $3.3M minus $100K is not a bad prospect, but take another $100K and buy your mom a small house, maybe even a fixer-upper or a Sheriff's auction house and then you can sleep nights knowing they are sleeping indoors but away from you. So many wonderful options that do not include being abused, and ending with peace of mind. But either way, please know you are in the right to have peace.
Piri Carroll 4 years ago
They sound jealous because op is young and got the house. Awful troglodytes.
Andy Hinds 4 years ago
I have just had my will written out and I have left my mother, my brother and eldest of my two sisters out of it because they are toxic people whom I have no time for. All this stuff about families being important is bullshit as far as I'm concerned because we were never close growing up. It's a long story but needless to say: I'm better off without them. I haven't spoken to my mother for 14 years and similar for my brother and sister from the same father because their presence is just annoying.
Anna Harding 4 years ago
The dad who passed away clearly knew what these people were like and that's why he didn't leave the house to them.
Rhonda Gatins-Martinez 4 years ago
i would not sell the home thats been in your fathers family so very long....i would get a lawyer and start proceddings to evict that selfish family.....pregnancy doesnt give one a free pass to act like a selfish a hole....nor should you tolerate being treated like crap....and i think your uncle shouldnt offer to buy home unless you need $ ...he shouldve offered to help with your situation with your family......get them out serve them restraining orders as im sure after you evict it will get ugly .....i think keeping a home that was left to you by your father as it was his wishes that you get it seem to be the right path....hope things get better for you
Random Anon 4 years ago
Just kick them out. I get the family angle but really what is the point anyway. Blood or not asshats will be asshats. Just because you're related suddenly that is okay? That doesn't happen in my books. Bottomline, if you can live with a decision and it's a decision made in clear conscience, screw 'em.
MaryLaure Albini 4 years ago
It sounds like mom, brother and silly are jealous because of the inheritance and taking it out on op.
Carol Emory 4 years ago
Don't feel bad about anything. No matter what you do, they will blame you for their sh*tty lives because that's what a**holes do. It's everyone else's fault why they are treated so badly. They never see it as being a consequence of their own actions. They are bullies and moochers. Take the Uncle's offer and kick them to the curb.
Henrik Lukas 4 years ago
Sister in law is acting like she a dog. Sure, dogs might eat your stuff if you leave it unattended, but c'mon.. Women don't become animals just because they're pregnant.
Pete Häkkinen 4 years ago
They are clearly horrible people since no one else wants to deal with them either so f**k them.
Wilf 4 years ago
Unless maintenance costs are a problem for her, I don't see why she even needs to consider selling the home to anyone! The other occupants have no legal right to live there and an eviction notice will cost her about £100 to get a solicitor to draw up. She certainly shouldn't be accepting below-market offers on the place from exploitative family members. UK property is experiencing a boom at the moment- if she did decide to sell, it will probably sell for more than the valuation within a couple of days of putting it on the market- and speaking as someone who has sold recently in London, that is NOT an exaggeration! She does not need to accept any con man uncle trying to steal it from her! STAND YOUR GROUND.
Thalia Lovering 4 years ago
I would sell the house to a third party and wave bye bye in no time.
Ray Martin 4 years ago
I hope this turns out well for her. Family can be the biggest parasites of all.
Renita McAfee 4 years ago
I'm actually proud of her. Good job. Distancing yourself, doing it legally, and not getting violent. 👍👍👍 There has to be a reason her dad didn't leave it to his wife.
Daniel Sintal 4 years ago
This is more of a commentary on the decline of values and the pure narcissism of all those involved.
Phil Heggs 4 years ago
I wouldn't seel your house, that is your inheritance from your father and you may regret it later in life. However, if you cannot afford to live there on your own, why not rent it out? The income may be enough to support you renting elsewhere on your own, it gets you on your own feet and gets them out of the house, all without losing your asset. Who is to say if you sold they wouldn't somehow get their grubby hands on the income from the property anyway and then you will be left with nothing!
Ezara Abdul 4 years ago
Don't worry hun you are not the @$$h0le,your family is. What kind of a mother would love the brother's girlfriend more than her own daughter? Selling this house to your uncle is rhe best option ever, buy a smaller home for yourself and save the rest of the money.Do not give any to them.they don't deserve it.
Craig Reynolds 4 years ago
I'd sell the house to the uncle even if he is taking advantage of the situation. The house is worth 2.5 million and he is willing to pay 2.4 million or $100k less. That's only a 4% discount. I don't know how real estate works over there but here in the states, you would lose that 4% and possibly more in a sales commission selling through an agent. Also, unless it's a seller's market, the odds are a buyer is not going to want to pay the full market price and you would likely end up taking a lower offer. Just make sure you don't sign over the deed/title until you have ALL of the money in the bank. Do NOT hold a mortgage/personal loan for any amount. You have to get ALL of the money at once, especially since he is family. Family debts are the hardest to collect if something goes wrong.
Mazer 4 years ago
I would have drummed up a free week trip out of town for all three of them, secured a restraining order, moved their stuff out off the property. While gone, I would have changed all the locks and the phone number. I would have gotten a PO BOX for them to use to contact me for whatever reason. Even posted a security guard at the front of the driveway if needed. I write this based on personal experience with narcissistic agile family members., Drawing clear boundary lines - even with mutual friends, limiting access to a PO BOX..best decisions I have ever made.
Eagle Girl 4 years ago
Are the laws different in UK that you can't legally remove someone? Or are there squatter's rights involved? Bc as annoying & rude as the family is, they didn't break any laws? If I was her, I'd sell the house to a friend with a contract to buy then take a loan against the house to install security. Then if the family comes back, laws are broken & legal actions can be made.
Ivana 4 years ago
I was going to say she shouldn't sell the house at a loss but 100K short when the house is worth so much is worth it to keep it in the family. She can even put a clause in the contract that she is allowed to remain in the house rent free for the next 5 years or whatever. Kind of compensates for being short the 100K. The other option is to evict them herself which any court would side with her as the legal owner and then she could get roommates or something to cover the expenses. Sounds like the selling to the uncle would be the best option but I would also include in the contract that she has buy-back rights, meaning if he sells it, she has the right to buy it back prior to it going on the market. Honestly to me it would boil down to how much I loved the house. If I loved the house, then I would evict and just get roommates. If I was fine with eventually not living in the house I would sell to the uncle.
The Starsong Princess 4 years ago
If uncle is offering you $100, 000 below valuation, he might be right - it could cost him about that to get rid of them and he would be taking on all the aggravation. Any independent valuation needs to take into account the eviction. However, my best piece of advice is once you decide on this, move away. Your family will do anything to get their hands on your money. You need to change all your passwords and flag your bank accounts and credit rating. Expect begging, identity theft and fraud.
Wilf 4 years ago
It would cost the callout fee for a locksmith- £99. The other occupants have no legal right to be in the property, they are not even formal tenants. She doesn't even need an eviction notice- she can just lock them out and call the police if they try to gain access. It's as simple as that. The Uncle is obviously trying to exploit the situation. He's more of the AH than the MIL in my view.
Load More Replies... Lyone Fein 4 years ago
Lawyer up. Evict them. Get a restraining order. Keep your house. On the day they are legally required to be gone, do not be home. Hire security to check to see if they are gone. If not authorize your men to start throwing their belongings out onto the street. Do not cease this activity until all of their possessions are cleared out of your house. Change the locks for ALL the doors. If any of them try to enter the property again, call your solicitor and the police. Do not get involved in any verbal exchanges with any of them. If they want to discuss the situation with you, have them contact your lawyer and set up an appointment for you all to meet at his/her office. They can pay for the time.
Lyn Moffett 4 years ago
She sounds like a greedy entitled bitch and your brother n mother are enabling her behaviour. Living in someone else's home you should be falling over yourself to help out especially when you're living rent/utility bill free. They sound like three scroungers and don't deserve to be in your home. Plain simple greed in the fact that she devours everything of yours. Being pregnant is no excuse. Maybe think over your uncles offer carefully too as 100k is a really big loss. Do your best to get them out then put the house on the market. Make sure you have good security to keep them from sneaking back in when you're not in the property. Nobody says you have to love your family. It's a sad fact but this family seem to be out to get all they can off you. If he has his 10k and your mum has hers or even part of it well that's plenty for a deposit on a place the three scroungers can all move into together. Let's see how long your mum treats her like a princess when she's the one having to clear up
Ashley Wise 4 years ago
I don't blame you for wanting them out of your house. Your dad left YOU the house, not your mom, brother and his pregnant girlfriend! There is absolutely no excuse for her taking your food just because she's pregnant! When I was pregnant with my daughter, I was hungry all the time, but I never ate anyone else's food without at least asking them first. (Btw, when I was pregnant, my husband and I lived with his parents in a 3 bedroom house along with his 11 year old sister at the time) If you do sell to your uncle, I wouldn't just jump into the offer just so you can get them evicted. Im sure you have paperwork showing your the sole beneficiary of the house and I would do like some of the others on here suggested, and have them legally evicted. Your mom & brother were left with enough money to get their own place and the house was left to you. They should be thanking you for your generosity in allowing them to stay as long as they have.
Rider 4 years ago
If you can afford it get them a hotel for 1-2 nights. While they are out change the locks and pack all their stuff up in the garage (shed or side yard work too). It's very easy to evict roommates, they do not have near the legal protections tenants do. If they call the sheriff, show proof the house is in your name and you live there (utility bill) and he will tell them to leave. May not be a bad idea to call the sheriff yourself to facilitate the exchange.
Pat Bond 4 years ago
This sounds fabricated. She would have to pay inheritance tax on the house, that would be around £180K for estates around £2.5million and would be expected when probate is achieved. If the story is true, she has to sell up anyway to pay the bills.
Helena Houzarová 4 years ago
There may have been enough cash in her inheritance to cover the tax as well. I'm sure her late father thought things through in that regard.
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