Swim Coach Insists 10YO Removes Parts Of Her Modest Swimwear Or Miss The Lesson, Parent Is Livid

Life would be so boring if everyone were the same. Different cultures keep things interesting and give us the chance to explore everything humanity has to offer, whether it’s food, music, sports, language, or unique points of view.

Sadly, sometimes cultures clash in unpleasant ways. One parent was irked after their ten-year-old daughter’s swim teacher excluded her from lessons because of her unconventional swimwear. They shared their story with an online community.  

More info: Reddit

Different cultures keep things interesting, but sometimes cultures clash in unpleasant ways

Young girl in modest swimwear and blue goggles, highlighting concerns about male swim teacher and swim lesson issues.

Image credits: user20177777 / Freepik (not the actual photo)

One parent couldn’t believe it when their ten-year-old daughter was banned from swimming lessons because of her burkini-style swimming costume

Parent shares concerns after male swim teacher questions modest swimwear of 10-year-old during lessons at community pool.

Parent concerned as male swim teacher addresses 10-year-old's modest swimwear during lesson discussion.

Facility swimwear rules stated, male swim teacher insists 10-year-old remove modest swimwear or skip the lesson on pool deck.

Male swim teacher instructs two young children in modest swimwear during a swimming lesson at an indoor pool.

Image credits: prostooleh / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The swim teacher told them the costume had to be “proper, fitted swimwear made of swim fabric” and that he wouldn’t be able to coach her properly if it wasn’t

Text snippet about a male swim teacher confronting a child over modest swimwear during a lesson, causing distress.

Parent explains conflict after male swim teacher demands 10-year-old remove modest swimwear or skip lesson.

Parent concerned as male swim teacher asks 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear or skip lesson.

Young girl wearing modest swimwear splashing water in pool during swim lesson with male swim teacher nearby

Image credits: EyeEm / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Annoyed, the parent hit back with proof that their daughter’s costume was legit, as well as the swimming class’s written policy

Parent shares complaint after male swim teacher tells 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear or skip lesson.

Parent discusses male swim teacher asking child to remove modest swimwear or skip lesson at swimming pool facility.

Parent discussing protecting daughter’s comfort during swim lesson with male swim teacher and modest swimwear issue.

Image credits: CocoLumiii

The teacher doubled down, though, so the parent reported him, but now they’re wondering if that was a jerk move

OP recently shared how their 10-year-old daughter was humiliated at a community pool when her new instructor demanded she strip off some of her modest swim gear. The child, who wears a fitted burkini-style swimsuit made entirely of proper swim fabric, was told she couldn’t participate unless her arms and legs were visible.

Despite the facility’s posted rules only requiring “proper, fitted swimwear made of swim fabric,” the instructor insisted he couldn’t teach her proper technique with her modest suit. When OP calmly explained that the outfit met regulations, he doubled down, calling it “distracting.” The girl ended up crying in the bleachers, missing the whole lesson.

OP tried suggesting compromises: a different-colored suit, a closer demonstration, or switching instructors. Instead, the coach publicly told their daughter again to remove her leggings, further embarrassing her. That’s when OP filed formal complaints with the aquatics director and the city’s inclusion office, demanding that things change.

They pointed out that many kids need modest or protective gear and that true inclusion means working with those needs, not outright banning children instead. For OP, protecting their daughter’s comfort, dignity, and right to swim outweighed appeasing an inflexible coach, but they still went online to ask if reporting him was a jerk move.

Young girl holding parent’s hand, looking down with a sad expression, representing male swim teacher and modest swimwear issue.

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

There’s no doubt that OP tried to be polite – she even offered a range of reasonable compromises, but the coach seems to be a bit of a bigot. So, what do you do when you come face-to-face with someone so ignorant they can’t see past their own point of view? We went looking for answers.

In her article for VeryWellMind, Amy Morin writes that, although some folks assume that anti-discrimination laws have eliminated racism from society, the sad fact is that ethnic minorities still deal with a lot of prejudice and discrimination. 

Studies have found that minorities are less likely to receive adequate care from physicians, less likely to receive employment offers, and are treated with more suspicion in public places. That’s just wrong on so many levels, don’t you think? 

The Amnesty International website suggests a few ways to call out bigotry when you see it. Start by listening to people who experience racism to get a better understanding of just how subtle it can be. Lean into awkward convos by addressing misguided opinions, and talk about what you’re for, as well as what you’re against.

It seems like OP was left with nowhere to turn but the top of the swim facility. Getting the city involved was a smart move as well. Here’s hoping the coach gets a reality check sooner rather than later, and her daughter can take her rightful place in the lanes. A public pool is no place for politics, after all.

What would you have done if you’d found yourself in OP’s shoes? Was the swim coach just sticking to the rules, or being a total jerk about things? Share your opinion in the comments!

In the comments, readers seemed to agree that the parent was not being a jerk, and instead suggested that the swim teacher was either a bigot or a creeper

Screenshot of an online discussion about a male swim teacher telling a 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear or skip lesson.

Online conversation about male swim teacher telling 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear or skip lesson.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a male swim teacher telling a 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear.

Screenshot of a comment expressing concern about a male swim teacher telling a 10-year-old to remove modest swimwear.

Screenshot of a forum comment discussing a male swim teacher's inappropriate demand regarding a 10-year-old's swimwear.

Comment discussing a male swim teacher telling a 10-year-old girl to remove modest swimwear or skip the lesson.

Comment discussing wearing a burkini and suspicion of male swim teacher’s motives regarding modest swimwear.

Comment discussing inappropriate behavior of a male swim teacher regarding a 10-year-old’s modest swimwear.

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