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Teen Baffled Over Dad Going Transgender And Demanding He Address Them As “Mom,” Vents Online
Interview With Author
Gender has become such a complex thing these days, and it’s shameful how trans people are treated. In fact, some folks are so heartless that they even go after their family, least concerned about how it can impact them. Quite vicious, isn’t it?
Something similar happened with the original poster (OP) and his twin sister, as they were bullied when their dad transitioned into a woman. Now, the poster is so resentful of his parent that he doesn’t even feel like talking to her. Just scroll down to find out what happened!
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
It’s a shame how some despicable folks target trans people and even their families
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The 18-year-old poster and his twin sister faced bullying when their dad came out as trans, and he’s angry that this broke apart their family
Image credits: FineAspect4576
Image credits: inkdrop / Pexels (not the actual photo)
He doesn’t want to refer to his father as “mom” or even “she”, and he’s so embarrassed of his situation that he started resenting his parent
Image credits: FineAspect4576
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
His parent tries really hard by spoiling the kids, but the poster just can’t get past how embarrassed he is about this
Image credits: FineAspect4576
He also clarified that he’s not transphobic, but just hurt that his father’s choice ruined their family and social life
This story might just break your heart, as the poster tells us how he feels about his trans parent. Our troubled protagonist is an 18-year-old, who also has a twin sister. About 4 years ago, his father transitioned into a woman and the couple got divorced. The kids stay with their trans parent, as she got the house, and she wants them to call her mom.
That’s where the whole problem lies, folks, because the poster just can’t bring himself to do it. He’s beside himself with anger over this, as it has torn apart their whole family. Not to mention, when their father came out and started dressing like a woman, the twins were bullied by people. That’s truly depressing isn’t it?
The poster is also so immensely embarrassed by his situation that he feels like telling his father to just stay at home. OP doesn’t want his friends to see his dad, especially the ones who knew him before he transitioned. He just feels so resentful of his parent and doesn’t feel like keeping contact even though she always makes an effort.
He admits that his trans parent has been spoiling him and his twin, and he also feels bad about the whole thing, but when he looks at her, he just can’t control the anger. OP also confessed that he is not transphobic, but he just hates the fact that it’s his dad who did it, which just broke apart their entire family.
Unfortunately, transphobia is quite real, and many people have gone through it, as a study has revealed. I mean, just the fact that a famous author (you know who) is spreading so much hate about trans people shows how messed up society is. When such awful people exist, is it any surprise that OP and his sister were bullied because of their father’s transition?
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Also, let’s not forget the detrimental and traumatic effects that bullying can have on the mental health of these teenagers. Many people tried to comfort OP, saying that his feelings are valid, too, and although his parent must be suffering, so is the poster. Besides, it has been observed that no matter their age, accepting their mom and dad’s divorce can be quite challenging for any child.
Many people assured him that his anger was justified, but they said that therapy is the answer to it, rather than seeking help from Reddit. The poster confessed that being bullied every day and then his parents’ divorce—both things at the same time—were pretty chaotic to handle, which might have fueled his anger.
A few netizens also said that they can understand OP’s resentment, but they also feel bad for his parent. She must have had to struggle through a lot to go through this transition, and the last thing she needed was to get hate from her own son. However, they also advised the poster that acceptance always takes time, and he was allowed to feel the way he was feeling.
When Bored Panda reached out to OP for an update, he mentioned that nothing has changed since he started senior year as kids are still mean to him. He also claimed that he’s very emotional about the whole thing, and feels as though he hasn’t done anything, yet has to face all this.
“I’d recommend anyone if they’re a parent and they plan on transitioning, just get your kids in therapy from the get go,” he advised
What are your thoughts about the story? We would love to hear from you, so leave them in the comments below!
People online empathized with the poster, assuring him that his feelings were valid too, and many suggested he go to therapy
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What do you think ?
Jayne Turner 3 months ago
I think family therapy is a good idea. However, you can't blame anyone but the bullies for making your life hell. People are cruel, especially when young, had the dad been just gay, it wouldn't have stopped the bullying. He might have been a different colour, he might have been disabled. Those bullies would still find something. Also, it is a grief process, the dad is gone and the woman taking his place is a stranger. Whether there will be a friendship there is up to them both,but it will take time. Perhaps later, the boy will be able to better accept that people aren't always who we need them to be. I can think of many examples,this one just happens to be trans. I hope they can work through it.
sturmwesen 3 months ago (edited)
about 2005 I met an online friend for the first time. when we were going to her house (she was about 17) she basically said "heads up:my dad is my mom" . her former dad/now mom was still visibly a biological woman. the face was male looking, she was tall and her style was.. experimental, like she had not yet found her style. I am sure my friend got bullied for it and it felt harder for her younger brother. when our car broke down "new mom" and granddad arrived and looked under the hood in a very cliche guy way. Legs wide for better stand and generally not as delicate as she tried to seem otherwise with her flowing skirts.we didn't care.what I am getting at is: I think the kids had to adapt a lot since you could not not see she was trans. but she was still their parent. you get to be angry, if you get bullied. you get to be angry,that your parents divorced.what you don't get to do is shame them.
Binky Melnik 3 months ago
The story about working on the car made me smile, and made me think “You can take the girl out of the garage, but you can’t take the garage out of the girl.” ☺️ Ideally, it’d be illegal to shame anyone save for those in positions of power; shame hurts the targets of it, while giving those using it a false sense of superiority, so absolutely NOTHING good comes from it *except*, perhaps, with people in positions of power: If they’re sufficiently shamed, they may change their behavior. Powerless people, though? Shame can result in their deаths. I wish we could outlaw shame, or only use it with people in positions of power. It’d be the 21st century’s version of the stocks.
Load More Replies...
MaggieMay85 3 months ago
That kid doesn’t want to accept the father and will probably blame everything in life on her now. It’s been 4 years and they’re still saying “he/ him”. I get they don’t want to call her “mom”, but to go as far as disregarding the basic courtesy to use the proper pronouns, that’s bs.
Jayne Turner 3 months ago
I think family therapy is a good idea. However, you can't blame anyone but the bullies for making your life hell. People are cruel, especially when young, had the dad been just gay, it wouldn't have stopped the bullying. He might have been a different colour, he might have been disabled. Those bullies would still find something. Also, it is a grief process, the dad is gone and the woman taking his place is a stranger. Whether there will be a friendship there is up to them both,but it will take time. Perhaps later, the boy will be able to better accept that people aren't always who we need them to be. I can think of many examples,this one just happens to be trans. I hope they can work through it.
sturmwesen 3 months ago (edited)
about 2005 I met an online friend for the first time. when we were going to her house (she was about 17) she basically said "heads up:my dad is my mom" . her former dad/now mom was still visibly a biological woman. the face was male looking, she was tall and her style was.. experimental, like she had not yet found her style. I am sure my friend got bullied for it and it felt harder for her younger brother. when our car broke down "new mom" and granddad arrived and looked under the hood in a very cliche guy way. Legs wide for better stand and generally not as delicate as she tried to seem otherwise with her flowing skirts.we didn't care.what I am getting at is: I think the kids had to adapt a lot since you could not not see she was trans. but she was still their parent. you get to be angry, if you get bullied. you get to be angry,that your parents divorced.what you don't get to do is shame them.
Binky Melnik 3 months ago
The story about working on the car made me smile, and made me think “You can take the girl out of the garage, but you can’t take the garage out of the girl.” ☺️ Ideally, it’d be illegal to shame anyone save for those in positions of power; shame hurts the targets of it, while giving those using it a false sense of superiority, so absolutely NOTHING good comes from it *except*, perhaps, with people in positions of power: If they’re sufficiently shamed, they may change their behavior. Powerless people, though? Shame can result in their deаths. I wish we could outlaw shame, or only use it with people in positions of power. It’d be the 21st century’s version of the stocks.
Load More Replies... MaggieMay85 3 months ago
That kid doesn’t want to accept the father and will probably blame everything in life on her now. It’s been 4 years and they’re still saying “he/ him”. I get they don’t want to call her “mom”, but to go as far as disregarding the basic courtesy to use the proper pronouns, that’s bs.
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