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Woman Mocks Her Sister’s Custody Arrangement, Instantly Regrets It When Free Babysitting Stops
Woman Mocks Her Sister’s Custody Arrangement, Instantly Regrets It When Free Babysitting Stops
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Woman Mocks Her Sister’s Custody Arrangement, Instantly Regrets It When Free Babysitting Stops

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Some folks just can’t appreciate a good thing, even when it’s handed to them on a silver platter. Whether it’s borrowing your favorite sweater and never returning it (yes, sis, I’m talking about you) or getting help with something they couldn’t manage on their own, ungrateful people have a way of making your kindness feel like a mistake.

And that’s exactly what one Redditor felt when she found out her sister had been badmouthing her behind her back, despite all the free babysitting she was helping her out with. Isn’t family fun?

More info: Reddit

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    A mother and her two children enjoy baking together, capturing a joyful moment of family bonding.

    Image credits: Elina Fairytale / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    One woman stops babysitting for her sister after she finds out she’s been calling her a “deadbeat mom” behind her back

    Text screenshot discussing babysitting refusal and being called a deadbeat mom.

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    Text discussing co-parenting schedule with involved father, balancing shared responsibilities without affecting children's schooling.

    Text screenshot about a woman's thoughts on enjoying personal time and flexibility through scheduled Facetimes.

    Text about feeling judged as a mom and a sister's new baby, related to ungrateful sibling issues.

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    Baby with colorful scarf, lying in crib next to stuffed animals; related to babysitting and family dynamics.

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    Image credits: Pixabay / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    The woman agrees to babysit for her sister a few times a week, after her husband leaves her, so she can go back to work

    Text discussing babysitting challenges and financial struggles faced by sisters.

    Text discussing childcare challenges and work-from-home arrangements, mentioning "work" and "childcare" issues within a family context.

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    Text discussing babysitting nephew, sister's work hours, and a forgotten diaper bag.

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    Text screenshot about a woman discovering her sister's ungrateful babysitting comments.

    Woman in sunglasses looking at her phone, standing on grass, related to ungrateful sibling situation.

    Image credits: Tim Mossholder / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    The woman sees a message her sister sent, calling her a “deadbeat mom” because she has a one-month-on, one-month-off style of co-parenting with her ex

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    Text conversation showing conflict over being called a "deadbeat mom.

    Text message expressing frustration about being compared to a deadbeat mom, while providing babysitting help for sister.

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    Text detailing a conflict where a woman cancels babysitting due to being called a deadbeat mom.

    Text exchange about babysitting argument involving ungrateful sister, highlighting feelings of disrespect and regret.

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    Image credits: HonestPension7665

    The woman refuses to babysit for her sister again, gets bombarded with messages, and is called a jerk by her family for it

    The OP (original poster) has a pretty sweet setup with her ex – a one-month-on, one-month-off parenting schedule. I have to admit, I haven’t heard of that one before, but apparently, it works well. During her “off” month, the OP still stays connected with her kids through FaceTime, sleepovers, and outings. If co-parenting was a sport, she’d probably have a trophy.

    But not everyone’s clapping for her, especially her sister, a newly single mom who’s juggling a new job and the chaos of single parenting. When the OP stepped in to help babysit a few times a week, you’d think there would have been a parade in her honor. Instead, her sis called her a “deadbeat mom” in some private chats that the OP accidentally stumbled upon.

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    Sis didn’t exactly handle getting caught with grace, trying the old “it’s out of context” excuse but refusing to show the entire conversation. So, the OP did what any self-respecting person would do: she pulled the plug on her free babysitting services. Suddenly, her sister remembered how to say sorry, begging the OP to reconsider, because, well, childcare costs aren’t exactly cheap.

    Turns out, losing her babysitter meant potentially losing her new job. Of course, the family group chat started lighting up, and everyone was calling the OP the bad guy. But is she, though? Calling someone a deadbeat mom because they figured out a parenting system that works for them? That’s like shaming someone for being on vacation while you’re stuck at work. Jealousy can make people say some wild stuff, can’t it?

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    Woman looking concerned, wearing rings and a dark sweater, contemplating after a dispute over "deadbeat mom" remark.

    Image credits: Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    It’s easy to understand why the OP’s sister felt some type of way—being a single mom is tough, and watching someone else live their best life can sting. But here’s the thing: jealousy doesn’t give you a free pass to treat people badly. Instead of tearing others down, wouldn’t it be better to focus on improving your own situation? Seriously, why do moms get judged for every single thing?

    Whether it’s how they split parenting time or what snacks they pack for their kids, it’s like there’s a competition to win the title of “Best Mom Ever.” But here’s the thing: nobody’s giving out trophies. Mom-shaming says way more about the person doing it than the one being judged. It’s usually rooted in insecurity, frustration, or jealousy.

    Because jealousy is a sneaky little relationship saboteur, isn’t it? When life gets tough, it’s easy to look at someone else’s situation and think, “Why do they have it so easy?” Ungrateful and jealous people can suck the joy out of your good deeds faster than a vacuum on turbo mode. The first rule of dealing with ungrateful people? Stop bending over backward for someone who doesn’t appreciate it.

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    Establish boundaries, whether it’s saying “no” to constant favors or refusing to tolerate disrespect. Next, communicate. Sometimes, people don’t realize they’re being ungrateful (or maybe they do and need to hear it anyway). Finally, learn to let go. Helping others is noble, but you’re not obligated to drain yourself for someone who can’t even muster a simple “thank you.”

    At the end of the day, gratitude and respect aren’t optional—they’re the bare minimum in any relationship. If her sister can’t manage that, it’s not OP’s job to swoop in and save the day. Sometimes, tough love is the best love.

    So, what’s your take on this story? Got any wild sibling tales or ungrateful moments to share? Drop them in the comments below!

    Netizens side with the woman, saying she is not a jerk for canceling her free babysitting for her ungrateful sister

    Reddit comment thread discussing a woman canceling babysitting for an ungrateful sister.

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    User's comment discussing a woman canceling babysitting due to ungrateful sibling's remarks.

    Reddit comment discussing toxic relationship with sister over babysitting.

    User comment discussing issues with family, calling a woman not a deadbeat mom.

    Reddit comment on women and motherhood, discussing 50/50 custody and criticizing self-sacrificing attitudes.

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    Text screenshot discussing babysitting cancellation and being called a deadbeat mom.

    Comment criticizing ungrateful sister, discussing betrayal in babysitting scenario.

    Comment on babysitting arrangements amidst family dynamics discussion.

    Text comment discussing insecurity and bullying related to parenting skills.

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    Text message criticizing sister's ungrateful behavior and supporting mom's childcare choices.


    The complexities of balancing work and childcare are evident, especially when expectations from family members come into play. This scenario highlights the challenges faced when siblings look to each other for babysitting duties. Discovering how one individual’s work commitments made it difficult to manage childcare reveals insights similar to the story of a Redditor who refused babysitting due to her own work demands.

    It’s critical to understand the nuances and demands of someone who is working from home and the importance of respecting their boundaries.


     

    Poll Question

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    Monica Selvi

    Monica Selvi

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

    Read less »
    Monica Selvi

    Monica Selvi

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

    What do you think ?
    Suzie
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This child has a dad. It's mother should make him pay for childcare or actually take care of their child. Calling her sister worse than a deadbeat dad when her sister is providing more help than the dad is beyond insulting.

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Also can you babysitt tomorrow at 7....?"

    Load More Replies...
    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As usual, the many voices telling her that she's so horrible can step up and volunteer a day or two every fortnight with precious sister's babysitting needs.

    Captive
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She has a deadbeat man and thinks her sister is worse? Wow. Instead of showing gratitude she backbites. Op should stay away for a while, maybe sister will then realize

    Makenzie McNeal
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely a "Deadbeat? I can show you deadbeat.😊" situation.

    Load More Replies...
    Earonn -
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The family members should step up and babysit or chip in for a nursery. Or, you know, STFU.

    ToGo
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm seeing a few sayings here so I'll add one - Don't bite the hand that feeds you. I can't stand people that don't really like you or how you live yet will ask of you and accept all the favours. I also hate disloyal people and bitching about your family in a group chat is a snake move. The sister here is clearly envious of OP and her co-parenting situation. I'm not saying it'd be the ideal arrangement for everyone, but both parents are involved and OP isn't struggling. Instead of being happy for OP, sis has allowed jealousy to take over.

    zims
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A woman with a 9-year-old and a 6-year-old who has a healthy, balanced life with her parenting partner: "Barely a mom." Coming from a woman with one child less than a year old, this is jealousy, plain and simple. She's stressed and overwhelmed and doesn't have the same support network her sister has, so she's lashing out. It's just as much about her ex as her sister. He walks away scott-free and she's trapped in the nightmare of supporting a baby AND a career solo. She sees her sister enjoying her life and her youth, and she knows she'll never have that freedom now. It's sad, but her vilifying her sister WHILE she's providing free childcare is the height of stupidity.

    Romy Rösli
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But sister did have a support network. Her MIL and OP took her kid while she was at work. Many parents don’t have that much support. But then she talked sh?t about one part of this network and now she’s f&cked, through her own fault.

    Load More Replies...
    WonderWoman
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP's custody agreement isn't something I would want, but it works for her, her ex, and the children -and that is absolutely amazing and wonderful for them. OP was being very generous, kind and loving when she helped her sister out, and her sister pissed all over that by talking smack about her with her 'friends'. Good for OP for telling her sister to get bent. Shame on all the people who got involved in the aftermath, it is none of their business and they should be keeping their opinions to themselves.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. I don't like how people are telling her it will be her fault if the sister loses her job. It would actual be the sisters own fault as well as the fathers. It's nobody else responsibility to watch her child.

    Cecilia Matthews
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Citizens which dwell in crystal edifices, ought not hurl granite fragments.

    Load More Replies...
    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah yes - the "be a doormat for an ungrateful person" rant. All those people berating OP for not helping sis can STFU. OP *helped* sis + where were *those* people? 🤔

    Romy Rösli
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA of course! The cousins can step up if they feel so sorry for the bully sister. Or the only real deadbeat in this story, the sister‘s ex, could finally be a father. I myself like to help others out but as soon as someone shows me they’re ungrateful I will stop.

    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    9 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah. I don't need a parade just some respect. The OPs sister doesn't respect her. Probably looks down on her for having her children as a teen mom. But jokes on sis as she's the one that chose the dud. She doesn't even have the excuse of being young and stupid.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Suzie
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This child has a dad. It's mother should make him pay for childcare or actually take care of their child. Calling her sister worse than a deadbeat dad when her sister is providing more help than the dad is beyond insulting.

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Also can you babysitt tomorrow at 7....?"

    Load More Replies...
    TribbleThinking
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As usual, the many voices telling her that she's so horrible can step up and volunteer a day or two every fortnight with precious sister's babysitting needs.

    Captive
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She has a deadbeat man and thinks her sister is worse? Wow. Instead of showing gratitude she backbites. Op should stay away for a while, maybe sister will then realize

    Makenzie McNeal
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely a "Deadbeat? I can show you deadbeat.😊" situation.

    Load More Replies...
    Earonn -
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The family members should step up and babysit or chip in for a nursery. Or, you know, STFU.

    ToGo
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm seeing a few sayings here so I'll add one - Don't bite the hand that feeds you. I can't stand people that don't really like you or how you live yet will ask of you and accept all the favours. I also hate disloyal people and bitching about your family in a group chat is a snake move. The sister here is clearly envious of OP and her co-parenting situation. I'm not saying it'd be the ideal arrangement for everyone, but both parents are involved and OP isn't struggling. Instead of being happy for OP, sis has allowed jealousy to take over.

    zims
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A woman with a 9-year-old and a 6-year-old who has a healthy, balanced life with her parenting partner: "Barely a mom." Coming from a woman with one child less than a year old, this is jealousy, plain and simple. She's stressed and overwhelmed and doesn't have the same support network her sister has, so she's lashing out. It's just as much about her ex as her sister. He walks away scott-free and she's trapped in the nightmare of supporting a baby AND a career solo. She sees her sister enjoying her life and her youth, and she knows she'll never have that freedom now. It's sad, but her vilifying her sister WHILE she's providing free childcare is the height of stupidity.

    Romy Rösli
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But sister did have a support network. Her MIL and OP took her kid while she was at work. Many parents don’t have that much support. But then she talked sh?t about one part of this network and now she’s f&cked, through her own fault.

    Load More Replies...
    WonderWoman
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP's custody agreement isn't something I would want, but it works for her, her ex, and the children -and that is absolutely amazing and wonderful for them. OP was being very generous, kind and loving when she helped her sister out, and her sister pissed all over that by talking smack about her with her 'friends'. Good for OP for telling her sister to get bent. Shame on all the people who got involved in the aftermath, it is none of their business and they should be keeping their opinions to themselves.

    Michelle C
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. I don't like how people are telling her it will be her fault if the sister loses her job. It would actual be the sisters own fault as well as the fathers. It's nobody else responsibility to watch her child.

    Cecilia Matthews
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Citizens which dwell in crystal edifices, ought not hurl granite fragments.

    Load More Replies...
    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah yes - the "be a doormat for an ungrateful person" rant. All those people berating OP for not helping sis can STFU. OP *helped* sis + where were *those* people? 🤔

    Romy Rösli
    Community Member
    9 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA of course! The cousins can step up if they feel so sorry for the bully sister. Or the only real deadbeat in this story, the sister‘s ex, could finally be a father. I myself like to help others out but as soon as someone shows me they’re ungrateful I will stop.

    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    9 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah. I don't need a parade just some respect. The OPs sister doesn't respect her. Probably looks down on her for having her children as a teen mom. But jokes on sis as she's the one that chose the dud. She doesn't even have the excuse of being young and stupid.

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
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