Bullied 7YO Comes Home Upset, Mom Considers Shaving Her After Classmates Mock Her For Being Hairy
Body image issues are something that pretty much everyone struggles with, and can find hard to accept or come to terms with. The problem is that these insecurities often start becoming a big deal when people are young, and they then tend to carry these worries into adulthood.
That’s exactly why one mom wasn’t sure whether she should help her seven-year-old shave to avoid bullying, or try to boost her confidence another way. She knew that either one of her choices could affect her child’s self-esteem for life.
More info: Mumsnet
Parents might feel helpless and not know what to do if they learn that their child is being teased for their appearance or physical features
Image credits: gpointstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that when she was helping her seven-year-old daughter get dressed, the girl seemed very eager to cover her body with long-sleeved shirts and pants
Image credits: prostooleh / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The mom questioned her daughter and found out that a boy from her class had been teasing her about her body hair and calling her a “boy” because of it
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster didn’t want her daughter’s confidence to be affected, so she felt that the best option would be to help her shave her body hair
Image credits: Gillettegirl
The problem is that the mom was worried that if she let her daughter shave, it could impact her self-confidence and put the wrong ideas in her head
As the poster had mentioned, she noticed that her daughter suddenly seemed shy about her body and was worried when she’d get to wear long tights and cardigans. That’s why, after a little bit of questioning, the mom realized that her little one had been getting teased about her leg and arm hair.
According to research on body image, both young boys and girls struggle with their appearance and might not have the confidence to accept all of their physical characteristics. These insecurities don’t just go away as kids get older; they might also face these same issues with their self-esteem in their teens.
Unfortunately for the little girl, the biggest cause of her insecurity was her classmate, who kept making jabs about her hairiness. He tried to make her feel like there was something wrong with her body hair and told her that it made her look like a boy, which she slowly started feeling self-conscious about.
In situations like this, many young women might feel bad about the hair growing on their bodies, and professionals state that these worries won’t go away unless the individual really works on them. It can be really tough to confront society’s ideas, but doing so might help the person be more comfortable with themselves.
Image credits: teksomolika / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Since the poster was quite concerned about her daughter’s feelings, she felt that the best thing to do would be to help the girl out by shaving her arms and legs. She also felt that this would probably stop the bullying and make the child feel confident while going to school and playing sports.
The problem is that the OP also realized that if she helped her daughter shave, it would probably teach her that it was okay to keep changing her body to fit society’s ideals. This is not what the poster wanted to do; she simply wanted her little child to feel better and be less self-conscious.
Although it can be quite difficult for parents to know how to navigate their child’s body image issues, experts explain that the best way to go about it is to first make their kid feel safe. Then they should have an honest discussion about the issue so that the child also understands that their natural physical characteristics are nothing to be ashamed of.
The mom wanted to do exactly that, but she knew that if her daughter kept getting shamed for her body hair, it would completely wreck her confidence. She also didn’t want her little one to get obsessed with her body image so soon, which is why she decided to ask folks online for advice.
What do you think is the best way for the mother to deal with this complicated situation? We’d love to hear your opinion on the story, and if you have ever faced something like this in your own life.
Folks were divided on the issue, with some feeling that the mom should just help her daughter out, and others stating that she shouldn’t let this happen so young
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It's great to give her the choice. I would say at 7, consider waxing. It needs to happen less regularly, and it's easier as a team until she build confidence, shaving might be hard and requires more attention to cuts and nicks. Hair removal cannon invasive and temporary, if it gives her more confidence let her try it out. It sounds like OP is doing everything else to help her daughter because a confident healthy kid.
Talking recently to a 15 year old who has many body issues, she said she dislikes changing for PE, especially because of her hairiness. Aware there is no mother at home, I started to talk about shaving - she stopped me saying she dislikes feeling judged (although no one has actually said anything) but she privately loves her hairness. I'm saying 'she' as she has explicitly told me she wants me to refer to her as she (biologically female just incase anyone wonders) yet I know others refer to her as he - as per her request. Her girlfriend for example, calls her her boyfriend. It's not actually confusing as it may sound, just an awesome kid who knows who they are but can't quite explain it yet - and knows those around who care will support whatever. Thing is, when she said she actually liked her hairness, several girls said how sad they were they felt forced to shave to fit in. Some saying they enjoyed the feeling it was growing up, and sad they had to hide that -
Like why were they hiding growing up? I do not have any great insight here, but I do really like the fact girls today are feeling able to express this.
Load More Replies...So now it's ok to body shame 7 year olds and for their parents to think that shaving a 7yo's legs is the solution? No, what you do is get her on social media and find similar hirsute females and show her that this is a natural thing and that she is still growing and having hormone spurts and explain that the bully - because let's call it what it is - will one day either grow up or morph into an incel.
I'm quite hairy and this was an issue when I was a kid. I wish my mom had given me the option to shave or wax, but i just kind of dissociated from my body to get away from it. I'm glad this kid has a mother who is giving it some thought.
Load More Replies...It's great to give her the choice. I would say at 7, consider waxing. It needs to happen less regularly, and it's easier as a team until she build confidence, shaving might be hard and requires more attention to cuts and nicks. Hair removal cannon invasive and temporary, if it gives her more confidence let her try it out. It sounds like OP is doing everything else to help her daughter because a confident healthy kid.
Talking recently to a 15 year old who has many body issues, she said she dislikes changing for PE, especially because of her hairiness. Aware there is no mother at home, I started to talk about shaving - she stopped me saying she dislikes feeling judged (although no one has actually said anything) but she privately loves her hairness. I'm saying 'she' as she has explicitly told me she wants me to refer to her as she (biologically female just incase anyone wonders) yet I know others refer to her as he - as per her request. Her girlfriend for example, calls her her boyfriend. It's not actually confusing as it may sound, just an awesome kid who knows who they are but can't quite explain it yet - and knows those around who care will support whatever. Thing is, when she said she actually liked her hairness, several girls said how sad they were they felt forced to shave to fit in. Some saying they enjoyed the feeling it was growing up, and sad they had to hide that -
Like why were they hiding growing up? I do not have any great insight here, but I do really like the fact girls today are feeling able to express this.
Load More Replies...So now it's ok to body shame 7 year olds and for their parents to think that shaving a 7yo's legs is the solution? No, what you do is get her on social media and find similar hirsute females and show her that this is a natural thing and that she is still growing and having hormone spurts and explain that the bully - because let's call it what it is - will one day either grow up or morph into an incel.
I'm quite hairy and this was an issue when I was a kid. I wish my mom had given me the option to shave or wax, but i just kind of dissociated from my body to get away from it. I'm glad this kid has a mother who is giving it some thought.
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