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22 Of The Dirtiest And Funniest Little NSFW Secrets, Unveiled By Members Of This Online Group
None of us is without sin, and sooner or later, every person does something… well, let’s call it “reprehensible.” Something that can only be told to the most devoted friend, a priest at the last confession... or in a thematic anonymous thread on the Internet.
Our selection of stories today is based on just such an online thread, where people, taking advantage of the anonymous word, share their strangest or funniest NSFW tales - and comment on similar stories from other netizens. So, let's move on to reading!
More info: Reddit
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#1
A few years ago I was laying out on the roof deck when a helicopter few over fairly closely. When it came back around I decided to make good of the fact I was wearing a crop top and flashed it. Well they must've seen me because they circled back around 4 more times, and I didn't disappoint each time. I figured helicopter fuel can't be cheap, so I wanted to make it worth the effort. When I finally went in I could hear them hovering for a bit, which was honestly pretty flattering. I hope they enjoyed the show.
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#2
I was homestaying at a host family's friends apartment in Hamburg with my rowing team in high school. I got in a fight with one of my teammates, and I left the apartment without shoes, wallet, or identification in an angry mood. Later, I came back, and they had left and locked the apartment.
Apartment blocks had a garden in the middle that could be accessed via a tunnel on one of the blocks. I went to the garden, determined what apartment I was staying in, climbed a tree, and jumped over onto the balcony under the one that I was staying at. I tried to climb up to that balcony because I thought I remembered that I left the window open.
There was a very flimsy iron bar that had a planter on it that I was balancing on while trying to grab the upper balcony when the owner of the apartment whose balcony I was on came out screaming "Thief" in german (I think, I only heard screaming) - terrified, I launched to a tree 40 feet off the ground, shunted down the tree and took off into the night.
Much later I returned to the front of the building and my teammates were back with the host - there were police everywhere.
I walked up an said "whats going on?" The neighbor didn't recognize me (thank god) and I went up to the apartment and went to sleep.
Never told that story to anyone.
LinkTheHylian 3 months ago
Storming off from an argument with no shoes, wallet, or ID? Nein! Das ist nicht gut!
#3
After my wife and I split I was on tinder and saw her current partner’s ex-wife. We matched. I said, why not? We did.
It's amazing how much we actually love reading other people's intimate confessions! Well, judge for yourself - just three days ago, a thread created by the user u/SaltyOperation5419 appeared in the AskReddit community - and today it already has as many as 7.7K upvotes and over 3.4K various comments.
Most likely, the main feature of the thread is the question asked by the topic starter: "What’s something NSFW you’ll never tell your friends, but will tell the internet?” It’s incredible, but people are literally lining up to share their little dark secrets!
So even if some of these stories will inevitably turn out to be fakes and fabrications, in any case, we’re quite sure that a significant part of the tales collected in this list are the pure truth. Well, it will be all the more interesting to read all this.
#4
In college there was a girl I shared most of my classes with. We made out one day and it led to me giving her head. The next day I got the highest score on one of our exams. From then on I gave her head before every exam I took until we graduated. Even for the classes with weekly tests. I was in the top ten in my graduating class. Till this day she takes credit for my GPA. Most people think thought we were just studying all that time and figured she's taking credit because she helped me learn the material.
Michael Largey 3 months ago (edited)
If you want to do well on exams, you better use your head.
#5
I'm not just autistic. I also have Schizoaffective Disorder, but I've been on a good med regimen for years and haven't hallucinated in over a decade.
#6
i blamed my dog for all the gross farts that permeated my house when my friends came over. my dog was innocent. it was me the whole time 😞
Phil Green 3 months ago
Many years ago, when I used to drink copious amounts of Guinness, I once farted in the van as me and my colleagues went to work. A colleague, at the back of the van, had to open the door and throw up in the road. I am very proud of that little moment in my life.
The very concept of NSFW, meaning "not safe for work" or "not suitable for work," usually means graphic or video content containing scenes of intimacy, violence, or other content unacceptable in a work environment, but in the conditions of the modern Internet, it has practically become a euphemism for intimate closeness.
This shorthand first appeared at the very beginning of the 21st century - already in 2003, its active use was observed on various online forums, and in 2009, it was actually standardized to denote various kinds of adult content. As of today, the term is already absolutely official and present in all academic dictionaries of the English language.
#7
I once hooked up with a m**f when I was 22, she was 54, then she once showed me a picture of her daughter who was 25, and I recognized her because I had hooked with her back when I was still a college freshman.
Uncle Panda 3 months ago
Does anyone else feel like organizing a response to the insane word censorship? I think a couple of days of no revenue would get their attention.
#8
My ex had and identical twin and I went up to her sister (thinking it was my ex) and slapped her a*s and told her I couldn't wait to shower with her and realized it was the sister. Sister didn't say anything at all.
Ellinor she/they/elle 3 months ago
Well it was an honest mistake, no one's fault and saying it would have only caused unnecessary trouble.
#9
i use to sell pictures of my feet to make money.
Wang Zhuang 3 months ago (edited)
If you're willing to share and people are willing to buy (despite there being loads of free feet pics on the net), I say go for it.
It’s interesting that among the stories collected in this list, there are confessions of people in literally all kinds of adult activities - and some of the storytellers' accounts are not even throwaway ones. Perhaps, people really want to share something with others - to get some feedback, even if it’s from people they don’t know and will never know in their lives.
This once again emphasizes that we, people, still remain social beings, even if our social communication is often limited to the screens of our gadgets. But still, on the other side of the screen, there should be other human beings who will express their point of view regarding our revelations.
#10
I sold my body for money when I lived in Berlin many years ago. And used the money to feed my d**g habits.
Clean now.
#11
Still a virgin, but I know there is nothing particularly wrong with that.
#12
Went on a hike that brought me up a pretty sizable cliff. Thought about my life (was laid off and having trouble finding the next role) and wondered what would happen if I just let go. Took a few steps towards the edge, then turned around and walked back down to the trailhead and left. Don’t think I’ll ever tell a soul I know personally.
Most likely, this mechanism is associated with the hormone oxytocin, which is responsible for the state of pleasure, relaxation, and affection in the human body. Oxytocin usually relieves stress, both physiological and mental, and reduces anxiety and pain. In other words, a very necessary and useful hormone.
So, one of the factors that stimulates the production of oxytocin is precisely stories. The very perception of stories and storytelling. For example, Paul Zak, a famous American neuropsychologist and economist, in his 2012 book entitled "The Moral Molecule,” showed that there are special signals in our brain that reflect involvement in stories.
That is, if we "speak out" in a particular situation, or, conversely, join in the experience of other people, this can really stimulate relaxation and pleasure in us. Perhaps this is precisely what determines the popularity of such threads on the Internet.
#13
I regularly was f**k buddy to a lady church elder whose husband had lost interest in giving her a good seeing to. She was insatiable. Sadly she moved away.
Edit. A Church Elder doesnt mean she was old. Its a post held by church goers in the Church of Scotland. She was 28 or 29 when we first 'met'. I was 34.
Michael Largey 3 months ago
I had the same experience with the divorced daughter of a fundamentalist preacher. There was nothing she didn't know about or wasn't into. But she dumped me because I was insufficiently pious.
#14
I've met 3 different girls who were obsessed with my teeth.... Who wanted to collect them in jars... And I can't understand why.
#15
I translated a couple doujinshi and posted them to a hentai site. They've spread to multiple different sites since. They were well received and I'm quite proud of my work, so it makes me a bit sad I can't brag about it to anyone.
In any case, we’re almost certain that you’ll simply be interested in reading these two dozen stories from a variety of people from all over the world. So now, please feel free to scroll this list to the very end. Who knows? Maybe add your own story in the comments below. After all, why not - as we’ve already said, people do love such plots and revelations.
#16
While I was in the military, I worked with 13 other OnlyFans models who were also in the military, made content. I did it for years and racked up more money than I did in service. No one knows it was me but I know people knew the girls and traded the content around.
#17
Occasionally being a bull for cuckold couples. My friends would probably all be shocked.
#18
Haven’t slept with someone in four years, I think it’s good? I’ve been trying to fight lust but, I feel like if I would ever again, idk how it would be, I’m more happy alone.
Uncle Panda 3 months ago
When I was 38, I realized I was essentially repeating the same dysfunctional relationship so I took a year off to think about that. And discovered contentment for the first time in my life. There have been liaisons since then but truly, I am my own best company. 24 years later, still one of my best decisions.
#19
I've been single for a couple of months now. I got back on the saddle almost immediately because the past relationship was over for a long time prior to us making it official. However pretty much every woman (and there's been a decent number of them) I've gone on a date with I just haven't felt like I wanna do those things with them.
It's not like they're unattractive or anything, I just... mentally am not feeling up to it with them. It's kind of nice to go on dates and not have any expectations, but it's making me genuinely worried that I'm just not gonna find anyone that really lights my fire again.
It's probably just a matter of not having been a long enough time, but still. Idk, maybe I just need to stop for a while and work on other things.
Bored Trash Panda 3 months ago
Just stop TRYING to find the perfect match and just have fun. That's how I met my husband. I wasn't looking for anything serious. Went on a few dates and just knew after that. Been married 6 years now, together for 8.
#20
One time I hooked up with someone and halfway through they called me the wrong name. I didn’t stop them. Not because I didn’t care, but because I suddenly realized I liked how wrong it felt. Now that name is stuck in my head in situations it really shouldn’t be.
Niels AirMax 3 months ago
Did that unintentionally to a girlfriend I had in the 90s. It stuck with her too, believe me... 🫣
What do you think ?
Faelwolf 3 months ago
Went to relax at a remote lake with my newlywed wife. We thought no one was around, and it was a nice day, we were newlywed, things happened. On the way back to the truck, we came across the game warden with a big grin on his face. He told me "Don't worry son, I don't need to see a license for that pole." :)
Julia H 3 months ago
Memories. I hope you and she are still happy and making new memories. Some less public than others
Load More Replies...
KatSaidWhat 3 months ago
I am the only person my aunt confided in that she almost "left" after a stint in a psych ward after my uncle k1lled himself. She swore me to silence. I confessed to her that I had come pretty close year 2 of covid. She took that to the grave with her. I will take hers to my own grave, which will not be of my own doing.
Craig Reynolds 2 months ago
For the poll above? "Family secrets win out for me. I'm in my 60s and still making shocking discoveries about my parents and other long-deceased relatives. It all makes me feel rather mundane about my own life so far.
martin734 3 months ago (edited)
In the late 90'sand early 2000's while at university I did some n*de modelling to earn money. I started off modelling for art clubs, art classes and camera clubs and then moved into more explicit stuff. I mostly did solo shoots that were featured in top-shelf gay magazines but I also did quite a few hardcore gay, several fetlsh themed and a couple of hardcore hetero shoots as well. There was a period from 1999 to 2001 when at least half if not more of the top-shelf gay and fetlsh magazines in the UK had photoshoots of me. Towards the end of my modelling career I did a couple of hardcore videos that ended up on VHS and DVD. I stopped doing the modelling when I started working full time as a paramedic. I don't have any regrets about doing it at all and I am happy to talk about it. I travelled to several different countries to do shoots and I met some really nice people, some of whom I am still friends with. I had a lot of very interesting experiences with some very memorable shoots.
Faelwolf 3 months ago
Went to relax at a remote lake with my newlywed wife. We thought no one was around, and it was a nice day, we were newlywed, things happened. On the way back to the truck, we came across the game warden with a big grin on his face. He told me "Don't worry son, I don't need to see a license for that pole." :)
Julia H 3 months ago
Memories. I hope you and she are still happy and making new memories. Some less public than others
Load More Replies... KatSaidWhat 3 months ago
I am the only person my aunt confided in that she almost "left" after a stint in a psych ward after my uncle k1lled himself. She swore me to silence. I confessed to her that I had come pretty close year 2 of covid. She took that to the grave with her. I will take hers to my own grave, which will not be of my own doing.
Craig Reynolds 2 months ago
For the poll above? "Family secrets win out for me. I'm in my 60s and still making shocking discoveries about my parents and other long-deceased relatives. It all makes me feel rather mundane about my own life so far.
martin734 3 months ago (edited)
In the late 90'sand early 2000's while at university I did some n*de modelling to earn money. I started off modelling for art clubs, art classes and camera clubs and then moved into more explicit stuff. I mostly did solo shoots that were featured in top-shelf gay magazines but I also did quite a few hardcore gay, several fetlsh themed and a couple of hardcore hetero shoots as well. There was a period from 1999 to 2001 when at least half if not more of the top-shelf gay and fetlsh magazines in the UK had photoshoots of me. Towards the end of my modelling career I did a couple of hardcore videos that ended up on VHS and DVD. I stopped doing the modelling when I started working full time as a paramedic. I don't have any regrets about doing it at all and I am happy to talk about it. I travelled to several different countries to do shoots and I met some really nice people, some of whom I am still friends with. I had a lot of very interesting experiences with some very memorable shoots.
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