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Couch Surfer Confused Why Friend Won’t Let Him Crash After He Roasted His Apartment
Group of friends eating pizza indoors, illustrating a social setting related to not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place.
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Couch Surfer Confused Why Friend Won’t Let Him Crash After He Roasted His Apartment

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If you ever want to be invited back to someone else’s home, houseguest etiquette matters. No host wants to welcome back a guest who criticized them or left their house a mess. So it’s important to be respectful of one’s space to maintain amicable relationships and score another invite.

Unfortunately, this guy completely ignored basic courtesy when coming to a friend’s home. Not only did he make fun of the buddy’s humble abode, but he also expected to let him crash there after a few days, for which he got a big fat rejection.

RELATED:

    To get invited back to someone’s home, guests have to be respectful

    A group of friends eating pizza and talking indoors, capturing the moment about not letting a buddy crash at the place.

    Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

    So it’s no surprise that this guy didn’t let his couchsurfer friend crash after he critiqued his humble abode

    Text on a light background questioning if refusing to let a buddy crash after he roasted the place in front of everyone is justified.

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    Text about a 26M with a small clean apartment who worked hard to afford it after a friend roasted it publicly.

    Text excerpt about a friend roasting a place that leads to a debate on not letting a buddy crash at someone's house.

    Text screenshot showing a quote about a buddy roasting the living space, relevant to not letting him crash at the place.

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    Text showing a friend roasting a place in front of others, illustrating why the buddy was not allowed to crash there.

    Text excerpt describing a friend roasting a place with jokes about furniture and bathroom, causing annoyance and rudeness.

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    Text excerpt about not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the apartment, related to AITA conflict.

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    Person explaining why they won’t let their buddy crash at their place after he roasted it in front of everyone.

    Man sitting on couch looking upset, illustrating the dilemma of not letting buddy crash after roasting the place.

    Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Person questioning if they are wrong for not letting a buddy crash at their place after the buddy roasted it publicly.

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    Text explaining a friend not letting his buddy crash at his place after the buddy roasted his apartment.

    Image credits: Round-Choice287

    People put a lot of effort into curating their home, so they might feel hurt when hearing critiques about it

    Man relaxing in a chair in a modern bedroom and living room, illustrating not letting buddy crash after roasting place.

    Image credits: Generated Image (not the actual photo)

    Whether you’re popping over to a friend’s house for a game night and a couple of drinks or spending a few nights while visiting town (or when in a pinch), there are certain guest faux pas that should be avoided to prevent any bad blood from forming. If you appreciate conversations over a glass of wine or crashing onto your friend’s couch when traveling or having a hard time, these should always be in the back of your mind when visiting people you’re close to. 

    First and foremost, a big ‘no’ while visiting other people’s homes is providing unsolicited critiques about their space, just like the person in this story did. People put a lot of effort into curating their home, so they might feel hurt when hearing negative and unprovoked comments about it, which, as a result, can put their relationship with guests in jeopardy.

    Another guest faux pas is treating their home like a hotel. People visiting other people’s homes should always offer to help and pick up after themselves, especially if they’re staying for a longer period of time. “Houseguests sometimes overplay their hand as guests and underplay the fact that they’re in someone’s house,” says relationship expert April Masini to Bustle. “So offer to do the dishes, walk the dog, or babysit the kids.”

    “Place your dirty towels and sheets in a hamper in the laundry room, so they’re easy to wash, but fold the coverlet and duvet at the end of the bed as they were when you found them,” adds entertaining expert Carla McDonald. These things are little, but they help to avoid accidental rudeness and ensure you get invited back again. 

    Do your best to be grateful for everything hosts have provided

    Two men shaking hands and laughing at an outdoor cafe, capturing a moment of friendly interaction and banter.

    Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Something else that is important to do when having an extended stay with trusted people is to be clear about how long you’ll be staying and what your plans are during it. The latter ensures that there are no scheduling conflicts. 

    “If you keep your schedule secret from them … you may show up with a packed calendar of meetings and get-togethers outside their home, and they’ve planned a dinner party, bought tickets to a concert, [or] scheduled other events because they thought you were coming to stay with a blank calendar for your visit,” Masina says. 

    When it comes to the duration of the stay, try to keep the stay brief so you don’t take advantage of the host and keep the visit exciting instead of exhausting. And if it wasn’t obvious yet, don’t show up unannounced, or even worse, with children, a partner, or a pet. Many people find this inconvenient and not spontaneous or fun. 

    Other additional guest faux pas include overpacking and ignoring any house rules. Avoiding these minimizes the number of things that will inevitably be scattered around and helps to prevent any unnecessary misunderstandings. Lastly, do your best to be grateful for everything—thank them when you arrive (bonus points if you bear a little gift, nothing too fancy) and leave. You can even invite them to your home as a thank you for their hosting efforts. 

    Some commenters thought the original poster did the right thing by refusing to let the friend crash

    Screenshot of an online forum discussing not letting a buddy crash at home after roasting the place in front of friends.

    Reddit discussion about not letting buddy crash after he roasted the place during a social gathering.

    Comment on a forum discussing if someone is AITA for not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place publicly.

    Text comment about not letting buddy crash at place after he roasted it in front of everyone, discussing friendship issues.

    Screenshot of an online forum comment discussing not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place publicly.

    Screenshot of a forum comment explaining why someone won’t let their buddy crash at their place after he roasted it.

    Screenshot of a social media comment about being happy with a thriving plastic plant, related to not letting buddy crash.

    Reddit comment explaining why not letting buddy crash after he roasted the place is justified in AITA context.

    Reddit comment discussing not letting a buddy crash at a place after he roasted it in front of everyone.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment stating NTA with 20 points, related to not letting buddy crash after roasting the place.

    Screenshot of an online comment discussing friendship and loyalty related to not letting a buddy crash after roasting the place.

    Comment on AITA for not letting buddy crash at my place after he roasted it, advising not to be a doormat.

    Screenshot of an online comment saying not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place, related to AITA hosting conflict.

    A comment defending not letting a buddy crash at a place after he roasted it in front of everyone.

    Comment about not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place, emphasizing respect in their own home.

    Screenshot of an online comment advising against letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place in front of everyone.

    Screenshot of a forum comment expressing anger, related to not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place.

    Comment on not letting buddy crash after he roasted the place, highlighting boundaries and friendship issues.

    Others thought he was being too sensitive

    Reddit user discussing whether not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place is justified in a sensitive situation.

    Comment criticizing a friend for being sensitive about banter after roasting the place and refusing to let him crash.

    Screenshot of a user comment discussing whether to let a buddy crash after he roasted the place publicly.

    Screenshot of a forum comment debating if someone is wrong for not letting their buddy crash after he roasted their place.

    Screenshot of an online comment discussing a situation about not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place publicly.

    Later, the original poster shared an update:

    Young man looking at his phone with focused expression, reflecting on not letting buddy crash after roasting his place

    Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Text update on AITA refusing to let friend crash at his place after being roasted in front of everyone.

    Text excerpt about a buddy roasting a place in a group chat and the refusal to let him crash after the incident.

    Text excerpt discussing a friend roasting a place and the conflict about letting them crash after the incident.

    Text discussing a folding table purchase and frustration about raccoon comments, related to not letting buddy crash.

    Young man wearing headphones and holding a controller, sitting in a gaming chair, reflecting on not letting buddy crash.

    Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)

    Casual apartment scene with IKEA shelves and a fake plant, discussing not letting a buddy crash after roasting the place.

    Text thanking Reddit for support, related to AITA for not letting buddy crash after he roasted the place publicly.

    Image credits: Round-Choice287

    Commenters were pretty satisfied with the update

    Forum comment discussing not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place in front of everyone.

    Comment on a forum discussing not letting a buddy crash at a place after he roasted it in front of others.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the apartment in front of others.

    Text post discussing moving out with a mix of cheap furniture and not caring about how the place looked.

    Comment from Reddit user TheeFlipper discussing not letting a buddy crash after he roasted the place in front of others.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment roasting a friend’s place, related to not letting a buddy crash after roasting it.

    Screenshot of a user comment discussing not letting a buddy crash at their place after he roasted it publicly.

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    Austeja Zokaitė

    Austeja Zokaitė

    Writer, Community member

    Read more »

    Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and in the past, I was a writer at Bored Panda. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. You can check them out below! I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them:)

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    Austeja Zokaitė

    Austeja Zokaitė

    Writer, Community member

    Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and in the past, I was a writer at Bored Panda. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. You can check them out below! I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them:)

    What do you think ?
    Damned_Cat
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have IKEA furniture in your starter apartment? Boy, you're fancy! My first apartment many years ago had a bookshelf made out of bricks propping up some boards from a broken-up pallet. The sofa was $10 from the thrift store. It was a portion of a sectional sofa (don't know what happened to the rest.) I say that you are doing really well for a person in their first place.

    Vinny DaPooh
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You had bricks and boards from a pallet?!? I had to use rocks and a dinosaur femur

    Load More Replies...
    kiteman
    Community Member
    5 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I met a dude in a new city. 2nd time we went out he asked to crash at my place. He lived a few blocks away. His friend said he was probably a closet gay. Not that is a big deal, but a random guy trying to stay in my place who may be gay and hiding it. I am a straight dude and I just said said nah, I am used to being alone but can order you an uber. Needless to say, he never spoke to me again. Judge the situation how you want, but I would rather go to sleep alone than with a stranger in the other room I know nothing about.

    Dog Mom to Zoe
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gay or not, a strange request from someone you've only known for a very, very short time. Keep your safety and sanity. I upvoted.

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    Agat
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    God, what an asshôle. I don't care that he's homeless, he can go to a motel for all I care. I'm not helping someone that made fun of the fact that I live in a small apartment. Sorry but how rude can you be? It's like making fun of someone for being poor (this dude is not - he has his own place). There are just things you don't make fun of - unless it's the way you joke with each other and it's meant to improve the mood. But this definitely wasn't that. Also, I'm kinda furious that people don't realise how good they have it.

    Load More Comments
    Damned_Cat
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You have IKEA furniture in your starter apartment? Boy, you're fancy! My first apartment many years ago had a bookshelf made out of bricks propping up some boards from a broken-up pallet. The sofa was $10 from the thrift store. It was a portion of a sectional sofa (don't know what happened to the rest.) I say that you are doing really well for a person in their first place.

    Vinny DaPooh
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You had bricks and boards from a pallet?!? I had to use rocks and a dinosaur femur

    Load More Replies...
    kiteman
    Community Member
    5 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I met a dude in a new city. 2nd time we went out he asked to crash at my place. He lived a few blocks away. His friend said he was probably a closet gay. Not that is a big deal, but a random guy trying to stay in my place who may be gay and hiding it. I am a straight dude and I just said said nah, I am used to being alone but can order you an uber. Needless to say, he never spoke to me again. Judge the situation how you want, but I would rather go to sleep alone than with a stranger in the other room I know nothing about.

    Dog Mom to Zoe
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gay or not, a strange request from someone you've only known for a very, very short time. Keep your safety and sanity. I upvoted.

    Load More Replies...
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    Agat
    Community Member
    5 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    God, what an asshôle. I don't care that he's homeless, he can go to a motel for all I care. I'm not helping someone that made fun of the fact that I live in a small apartment. Sorry but how rude can you be? It's like making fun of someone for being poor (this dude is not - he has his own place). There are just things you don't make fun of - unless it's the way you joke with each other and it's meant to improve the mood. But this definitely wasn't that. Also, I'm kinda furious that people don't realise how good they have it.

    Load More Comments
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