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“Cancelled His Passport”: 61 Hilarious, Petty And Ridiculous Things People Did After A Breakup
You can turn your other cheek or you can draw whiskers on theirs with a permanent marker while they're asleep. Some people choose to simply walk away after a break-up, others choose to go to war with a very creative cache of ammunition.
Maybe they lied, cheated, or left you at the alter. Whatever atrocity they committed, they best believe revenge is waiting around the corner - ready to pounce when they least expect it. If you're pondering ways to make your ex pay for their sins, you're in luck. Someone recently asked, "What’s the pettiest thing you ever done after a break up?" and people weren't shy to admit the times they refused to be the bigger person.
From putting an entire bag of sugar in his protein powder before a big bodybuilding competition, to canceling his passport the day before an important flight, some of these acts prove that hell hath no fury as a woman (or man) scorned. Bored Panda has compiled a list of the most ridiculous, petty, hilarious and savage responses for you to scroll through while you plot your own road to revenge.
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#1
For legal reasons: I didn't do it (jet). He forgot his second car key at my apartment. For weeks I drove to his place at night (I work night shifts, so I'm awake a lot at night) and parked his car at another place. Not very far away. Just far enough to drive him crazy and doubting his own sanity.
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#2
I got my ex good - he had booked a trip to Bali with the other woman but he owed heaps of child support to his ex wife. I contacted c.s. they took half his pay and put a prohibition to travel overseas order on him. No lovely trip to Bali for him.
#3
Out of nowhere, he decided he didn’t want to be with me anymore after five years. And proceeded to kick me out of the house. Little did he know I took everything I bought. Which was literally everything in that house. All the way down to the towels, the blankets, the soap, the dishes. He had nothing left in that house when I left.
#4
I noticed he was still using my Netflix, waited until he was 2 episodes away from the Breaking Bad finale then deleted him from the account
#5
When he told me he was visiting his kids for Christmas and I found out he was actually married. I found his wife’s phone number, waited until he came back and invited him over to order take out and watch a movie. Asked him if he was married and gave him the chance to fess up, he didn’t so I FaceTimed his wife in the room with him. She filed for divorce the following month.
#6
took every lightbulb.. in every light, lamp, refrigerator, porch .. he thought the electric was cut off.. ironically he used to call me the light of his life, so I let him realize how dark it was without me..
#7
Stole the spinning glass plate out of his microwave
#8
I called Ticketmaster and told them my tickets got stolen and let him and the girl he cheated on me with get turned away at the door.
#10
Found out he had a wife, ghosted him and started buying stuff from his wife of Facebook Marketplace. Became friends with her and got invited to their kids birthday party at their place. The fear in that mans eyes when I arrived...
#11
Donated 40,000 of his sky miles to a canine charity. Figured since he knew so much about being a dog..
#12
Told his mum exactly what he did! Sounds childish but my god the satisafcation was incredible. She was horrified, apologised for his behaviour and took me out for dinner to chat about it all and she's still friends with me to this day and he has no idea!
#13
I still give his number to guys who ask me out
#16
Took a package of 1000 red dot stickers and covered his white truck with them.
#17
found out from a friend he’s on tinder under a different name. Created my own tinder account with fake name, photos of some random hot girl. Super liked him and he took the bait.. then proceeded to toy with him for about a week until i got bored. And then set up a meetup date… at this point he was begging me for my number - i gave my real number… few minutes later I get a text saying “guess it’s safe to assume we’re over”
Con O Cuinn 10 hours ago
They never think about how s****y they are being to the person who's photos they stole
#18
I used sticky tape to hide a shrimp in his car so he would never know where the smell came from
#19
Fast forwarded almost all of his Netflix shows he was currently watching. Finished movies. Started watching things like Taylor Swift, kids shows, rom coms etc. anything he hated. I spent five hours messing with his algorithms across Netflix and YouTube. I deleted his YouTube history which he commonly used as well as his playlists. Honestly, I would not have done it if I was sober. Felt mild shame but also satisfaction in the days and weeks that followed.
#20
He was sleeping with his colleague. I snuck into the apartment, caught them in our bed, took a picture, and sent it to all his colleagues and everyone in his family
#21
After we broke up and I moved out, I waited a week or so... then l cancelled the internet the day of a big UFC fight I knew he was wanting to watch 😂 The internet was in my name
#22
I put posters up with his number and said "best chewbacca impression wins £100!" ... he has 2000 vms in 4 hours
#23
Little beeping machines I got from Amazon. It randomly beeps. Hide them well. Heard he thought he was going crazy.
#24
He moved out but kept turning up unannounced to use the garage. It had a padlock and he didn’t give me a key. One day he left the padlock unlocked so I took this opportunity to replace it with an exact replica. I will forever be disappointed I didn’t see his face when his key no longer worked
#25
I called the dealership where my ex fiancé bought his car from after learning that he bought it with a fake ID and they were trying to repossess it, and I told them where he was hiding it. He had to catch a bus home.
#26
He was a bodybuilder so I put an entire bag of sugar in his protein powder a month before his competition.
#27
Found his online dating page. His password was the same for everything, so I changed his “seeking female” to “seeking male”. I’m sure he got some interesting messages. He never said a word
#28
Stitch ripped all his designer clothes just enough so they’d start to fall apart as he wore them
#29
I took all the shoe laces from his left shoe then put glitter in the right shoes
#30
Used his number for callbacks/ information for everything I could find on the internet : plastic surgery, crypto trading, hiring venues, cruise enquiries, skips, no win no fee etc. I got so much satisfaction from it and it had me howling! Bet he’s still getting the calls
Power puff scientist 7 hours ago
I used to think this was hilarious as well in middle school to do to my “enemies”
#31
After breaking up Left his house with the TV remote
#32
I became friends with his ex and we planned this whole thing to make him think we were more than just friends. Every time he messaged one of us about coming over, we sent him pics of us hugging like a couple.
#33
Not my story but I knew someone who took every single right shoe of all the shoes he owned (and he had a lot !!) and disposed of them
#34
Woke her up at 5am on valentines day told her to check her email where I had sent divorce paperwork since we were long distance due to military
#35
Reported Visa card stolen - on a Friday night. While he was overseas. Weekend in Edinburgh- no money
#38
He would come home from work & straight away go 💩. I took every single thing he could wipe with. All the TP, napkins, paper towels, anything flushable.
Russell Bowman 13 hours ago
I would have left the paper towels ... they will quickly clog up a sewer pipe
#40
I was talking to a lady the other day and she said her and her girlfriend went and bought 99 crickets and released them in his apartment and she said she was mad that she didn't think to put raw shrimp in the air vents
Tropical Tarot 13 hours ago (edited)
My cousin used crickets as fishing bait. They are almost impossible to re-catch after you knock over the container.
#41
I dropped off my ex partner’s belongings at his workplace strategically placing his unwashed skid marked undies on the top so that everyone could see
#42
He tried to sabotage a project and study I was conducting, so I exposed his “lack of leadership” in the resulting journal article
#44
I took a picture of my hairy legs on his bed with his ipad and left it there for his wife to find it. He never told me he was married.
#45
My ex was obsessed with collecting expensive items on roblox so I got his account banned. So he wasted all that money for no reason.
#46
Didn’t sleep with his friend but made it seem like I did and I let it go on for months since he’d keep tabs on me. Went to his house since he’d magically kept forgetting my things and took it back with his best friend 😂 whilst his parents were home.
#47
Someone used milk and a little bit of water in a spray bottle. Sprayed EVERY soft furnishing in the house. Carpets, curtains, bedding, even the bed base/headboard etc. it dried quick. After days (after she’d moved out) the smell began from dirty gone off milk
#49
After I found out he was having an affair with a much younger co-worker and divorcing me, I peed on his toothbrush everyday for two weeks before he moved out!!
#50
After he cheated i got close to one of his elder support brother and got invited to his show. The man posted a story with me and my ex bombarded him & i with calls and texts. We both blocked him
highwaycrossingfrog 10 minutes ago
Firstly I'm not sure what an elder support brother is, but the revenge was OP went to his show, date posted a story, and they both got bombarded with calls and blocked him? Sick burn
#51
Signed him up for jehovahs witnesses to come every week and to get care packages and calls and emails and everything else they could offer
#52
My friend made her ex think they were getting back together and took a shower at his house and peed in his shampoo bottle
#53
Drained his Hugo boss cologne his girlfriend bought him and filled it with urine. Unforgettable!
#54
After I sent out the group chat to the 42 girls, he was sleeping with at the same time, I added a ton of songs featuring my name to all of his playlists
Power puff scientist 7 hours ago
42 girls at the same time? Bro a pornstar or something? Wish i was so good at time management.
#55
He went to jail and I booked every single visit so he couldn't get visitors for 1 year straight
#56
Put shrimp tails in his curtains rods. Home got stinky and he couldn’t find out why!!
#57
Made a fake IG account with his face as the profile pic, and hit on his bosses’ wife. It got him fired from his nice corporate job. Repeated that at the next two places he got hired at.
#58
Used his toothbrush to clean the toilet than put it back in holder
#59
Found his dad on Tinder (he told me his parents recently got divorced) slept with his dad, sent him a photo and blocked him before he got a chance to respond :)
#60
He slept with everyone so I slept with his best friend.
#61
I texted his family that he gave me HIV and got me pregnant. Then I signed him up heaps of gay websites
Crystalwitch60 1 hour ago
Ok that’s way outta line ! in uk that wouldn’t end well for you either ! Mud sticks , n that kinda lie is psycho level ! Poor bloke , you do realise shite like that can lead to the people targeted opting out of life don’t you !, nothing but nothing is worth that as revenge , u op aren’t right in the head !
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What do you think ?
General Anaesthesia 1 hour ago
Yeah, a lot of Walter Mitty-esque daydreaming going on.
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Littlemiss 8 hours ago
I shut the door in the face of one ex who showed up uninvited to my home. Had the cheek to ask after a family member that was dying when he'd seen me last, as if trying to pretend to care would get an invite in. Gotta love a trier.
General Anaesthesia 1 hour ago
Yeah, a lot of Walter Mitty-esque daydreaming going on.
Load More Replies... Littlemiss 8 hours ago
I shut the door in the face of one ex who showed up uninvited to my home. Had the cheek to ask after a family member that was dying when he'd seen me last, as if trying to pretend to care would get an invite in. Gotta love a trier.
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