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Family Rejects Daughter’s Fiancé, She Can’t Take It Anymore And Reveals His Earnings
One of the most important things in life is financial stability. Couples certainly need to be in-tune about practical things like budgeting, saving, and investing. That being said, the quality of your relationship goes far beyond just money. Trust, good communication, respect, support, and passion are all fundamental.
The reality, though, is that some parents put far too much emphasis on cash. Instead of hoping that their kids find a partner who is kind and caring, they urge them to find a significant other who earns a ton. One internet user, u/RedBee7763, went viral on the AITA subreddit after sharing how her relatives looked down on her fiancé. They thought that he barely made ends meet with his salary, when the exact opposite was true. The woman accidentally let slip what her soulmate actually earns and asked the internet for advice on what to do. You’ll find the full story, including the internet’s reactions, below.
RELATED:
Even though financial stability is important, happiness in healthy relationships revolves around more than just money
Image credits: Ono Kosuki (not the actual photo)
One internet user shared how her family kept looking down on her fiancé, unaware of how much he actually brought to the table
Image credits: nebojsa_ki (not the actual photo)
Image source: RedBee7763
The story got a lot of attention and started an intense discussion
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
According to the OP, things have been tense, after she couldn’t take it anymore and stood up to defend her fiancé, whom her family had looked down on for years. Now, her parents are mad at her for having kept secrets about him from them.
On the flip side, the redditor’s partner is disappointed that she wasn’t able to keep his secret. “I’m stuck in the middle and don’t know what to do,” she wrote.
The reaction to the story was mixed. Many redditors reading the story weren’t impressed by the way that the OP handled the situation. Some thought that her fiancé would have defended himself if he had thought it important, so there was no need to step in on his behalf.
Others wondered why the woman focused on proving her parents wrong by highlight how much her partner earns, instead of talking about how happy he makes her and what a great character he has.
And while some thought it was wrong for the OP to break her partner’s trust, others pointed out that she must have been incredibly frustrated, constantly having to hear her family making fun of him. Others, meanwhile, were even more sympathetic to the author of the post.
No matter what happened, the core issue is that the post author’s family value people’s earnings far, far more than anything else. Don’t get us wrong, financial stability is essential: you want to have a safety net and to have more opportunities in life for yourself and your children.
Money issues are among the top things that couples fight about, so it’s essential they’re on the same page
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
‘Brides’ points out that the top things that married couples fight about most often are money, intimacy, and housework. So being on the same page with your partner in terms of finances is a great idea and will provide stability in the long term.
However, happiness in life isn’t just a product of wealth. Otherwise, you’d see millionaires and billionaires strutting around smiling and dancing all the time. More often than not, it’s the opposite. No matter how much you earn, it never seems enough. And with greater wealth come more responsibilities; as well as mistrust in others and the paranoia of losing it all.
True happiness is about developing meaningful relationships with your family and friends, finding purpose in your work, and giving back to the community by volunteering your time, energy, and cash. Not only that, many would argue that having good health is far more important than a massive bank balance.
However, when it comes to charity, it’s a good idea to focus on the causes that you personally care about, not what everyone tells you is important. According to the Harvard Business Review, you’re more likely to be happy from spending money on someone else, however, it matters how and why you give.
You’ll feel far happier about your decision to be charitable if you feel like you were free to make the decision, instead of forced into it by your peers.
The author of the post revealed some more background info in the comments
Many readers thought that the woman did the wrong thing
However, some believe that pretty much everyone was in the wrong
Others stood up for the author. Here’s what they had to say
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What do you think ?
Emilu 2 months ago
I can see where she's coming from, but at the same time IMO justifying a person's existence/relationship to you etc based on how much they earn is gross.
Ms.GB 2 months ago
Yeah now they'll probably be all fake nice but at least he'll always know it's fake.
Load More Replies...
Alexandra 2 months ago
You know your parents are unreasonable, so why do you defend them? You love them, but that is not the same as condoning their irrational behaviour. If you can't stand up to them, making it clear that respect has nothing to do with what someone does and/or earns, you have no business being with your fiancee, because you will always feel as if you're in the middle between them whereas you put yourself there by not choosing the side of reason and respect.
Fellfromthemoon 2 months ago
Lady, your parents, your responsibility to establish boundaries and find suitable ways for communication. Your parents are not your fiancé's relatives - yet. They have no right to know his personal data, including income. He clearly stated he doesn't want to share this info. How you manage your situation with your snobbish parents is up to you, at least, until you break your promise to your future husband.
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
It was a mistake to give away the information he told her to keep to herself, but an understandable one. Hopefully the husband can come to an appreciation that she just didn't like seeing them treat him like dirt. Right intentions, wrong e.xecution. The family are still the bigger AHs.
FreeTheUnicorn 2 months ago
If his net worth will change how your family treats him, just cut ties with family they are awful people.
Dusty's mom 2 months ago
And if you have children and your parents speak ill of him in front of them? Tell your fiancee you're sorry. But have a sit-down with him about the future. Should potential children always be supervised around your family? Maybe you should take a break from them. I would hate to have your father be my doctor. If he looks down on your husband, he'll probably look down on his patients as well. Not good.
Leolynn Cauthron 2 months ago
Anger. Management. It was his secret to tell - or keep. Clearly your husbands emotional IQ is stronger than yours. Your husband can defend himself. He chose not to. You did what you did for yourself against his wishes even though it was his secret to keep. Your genetics are showing. The cat is out if the bag now. No putting it back. But I suggest a heartfelt apology and then stand at his side not in his path in future clashes with your toxic parents.
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
Bit harsh. It's not easy constantly listening to people look down on someone you care about. It's less of an emotional IQ thing than it is her family pushing her to a breaking point. If anything, the HUSBAND is showing lack of emotional IQ since he doesn't seem to understand the stress this was putting her under. In reality, both sides (not including the family, because f**k them) are showing a lack of emotional IQ: The husband for not understanding how the constant stress could cause her to slip up and her for blabbing his income in the heat of the moment. The relationship seems sturdy enough that I'm sure apologies will be made and accepted, I'm just not too quick to assign harsh judgement. Listening to people constantly look down on a loved one hurts. A lot.
Load More Replies...
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
You strike me as the type to dislike people just because they're rich, which is roughly as obnoxious as rich people looking down on someone just for being poor. How in god's name did you read this and miss the underlying problem so thoroughly?
Load More Replies... Emilu 2 months ago
I can see where she's coming from, but at the same time IMO justifying a person's existence/relationship to you etc based on how much they earn is gross.
Ms.GB 2 months ago
Yeah now they'll probably be all fake nice but at least he'll always know it's fake.
Load More Replies... Alexandra 2 months ago
You know your parents are unreasonable, so why do you defend them? You love them, but that is not the same as condoning their irrational behaviour. If you can't stand up to them, making it clear that respect has nothing to do with what someone does and/or earns, you have no business being with your fiancee, because you will always feel as if you're in the middle between them whereas you put yourself there by not choosing the side of reason and respect.
Fellfromthemoon 2 months ago
Lady, your parents, your responsibility to establish boundaries and find suitable ways for communication. Your parents are not your fiancé's relatives - yet. They have no right to know his personal data, including income. He clearly stated he doesn't want to share this info. How you manage your situation with your snobbish parents is up to you, at least, until you break your promise to your future husband.
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
It was a mistake to give away the information he told her to keep to herself, but an understandable one. Hopefully the husband can come to an appreciation that she just didn't like seeing them treat him like dirt. Right intentions, wrong e.xecution. The family are still the bigger AHs.
FreeTheUnicorn 2 months ago
If his net worth will change how your family treats him, just cut ties with family they are awful people.
Dusty's mom 2 months ago
And if you have children and your parents speak ill of him in front of them? Tell your fiancee you're sorry. But have a sit-down with him about the future. Should potential children always be supervised around your family? Maybe you should take a break from them. I would hate to have your father be my doctor. If he looks down on your husband, he'll probably look down on his patients as well. Not good.
Leolynn Cauthron 2 months ago
Anger. Management. It was his secret to tell - or keep. Clearly your husbands emotional IQ is stronger than yours. Your husband can defend himself. He chose not to. You did what you did for yourself against his wishes even though it was his secret to keep. Your genetics are showing. The cat is out if the bag now. No putting it back. But I suggest a heartfelt apology and then stand at his side not in his path in future clashes with your toxic parents.
Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
Bit harsh. It's not easy constantly listening to people look down on someone you care about. It's less of an emotional IQ thing than it is her family pushing her to a breaking point. If anything, the HUSBAND is showing lack of emotional IQ since he doesn't seem to understand the stress this was putting her under. In reality, both sides (not including the family, because f**k them) are showing a lack of emotional IQ: The husband for not understanding how the constant stress could cause her to slip up and her for blabbing his income in the heat of the moment. The relationship seems sturdy enough that I'm sure apologies will be made and accepted, I'm just not too quick to assign harsh judgement. Listening to people constantly look down on a loved one hurts. A lot.
Load More Replies... Anthony Elmore 2 months ago
You strike me as the type to dislike people just because they're rich, which is roughly as obnoxious as rich people looking down on someone just for being poor. How in god's name did you read this and miss the underlying problem so thoroughly?
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