“Unsure What To Do”: Woman Discovers Partner’s Group Chat Messages And Is Absolutely Horrified

Those are her friends and that is how he feels appropriate talking about them imagine what he might even say about her when he's upset. I would be having a talk with my spouse and leaving because I will be damned if I'm going to be in a relationship with someone who shows so much disrespect towards women who have done nothing to deserve those rude comments.

Honestly? I'd be really shocked if I saw my husband talking like that. It reveals two things, that he is eyeing up and thinking about the s*x with these girls what it could be like, and that he doesn't have any respect for women in general. I would have serious ICK

And I for one HATE how people are minimizing all the hateful misogyny, excusing it, deflecting, turning it around on women. NO. JUST NO. What he said was straight-up hateful, body-shaming, meant to be hurtful, and devaluing them as people. If I were her, I'd leave whenever he wasn't around so he would walk into a stripped house. Leave copies of the screenshots with nothing written. Either he gets it, or he can die alone.

It just sounds like the typical crude hyperbolic ways people speak to each other in private. All they said is one girl was good looking and one wasn't in a more poetic way.

It doesn't seem plausible that someone you've been in a relationship with for years hasn't said cruel things in OPs presence but breaks out in a group chat. Maybe it's not sexual in front of her, but you just don't think to say things like that unless you're a cruel person. She's seen this side of him and been fine with it, but now that it's about her friend's/their bodies she's repulsed. Don't worry about confronting him, break up now, being single is far better than living with a cruel person who doesn't respect your friends and feels comfortable objectifying women as a punchline.

My husband and I have conversations I'd never have wirh friends. I have conversations with friends I'd never have with my husband. Scan the room. Know your audience. Do not browse someone's phone unless you think they are dangerous. No good comes of it. I think a lot of uncomfortable stuff. I only say uncomfortable stuff in the right setting. My Mom confided in me she was glad my stepdad died. I'm the only one she could have said that to who wouldn't judge her. He'd been sick for years. Sometimes you have to say things out loud to people you trust. The Internet isn't the place for that.

Dear partner

Like women don't talk about men/bfs/husbands Like that to there friends

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I don't think women fully grasp how important s*x is to men or how it shapes our worldview. He didn't say he wanted to have s*x with them, only that he would not or found the idea unpalatable Women tend to do the same, but in terms of what a man can give to them. They will back friends they know are pregnant with another man's child or only gold digiing for a place to live or possessions with a "Yes queen, slay, you get yours" not because they are the same degree of slag at heart, but because that is how the group dynamic is. Men are blunt creatures. Trust me on this. I've been one my whole life. But we see things in terms of mating. We will love a sweet taco bell drive thru worker over a bitter CEO in a heartbeat. We can be crude and embrace a gallows humor about a situation. It helps numb the pain for the other guys in the chat who maybe have let on that their relationship is falling apart because their partner is acting weird.