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Man Insults Wife In Front Of Friends, Gets Mad She Won’t Cook For Him Anymore
Offended wife standing in kitchen with arms crossed, refusing to cook for her husband, showing upset expression.

Man Insults Wife In Front Of Friends, Gets Mad She Won’t Cook For Him Anymore

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How you divide the housework with your significant other, when both of you are employed full-time, is incredibly important. If you don’t do this fairly, someone will have to take on the lion’s share of the chores and will start feeling resentful.

A woman asked the AITA online community for its thoughts on an emotionally messy situation in her marriage. She revealed how her husband, who is a big video game enthusiast, insulted her cooking at a dinner party with friends. And so, she decided to stop cooking for him entirely, which made him mad. Check out the full story and the internet’s reactions below.

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    Most people would be incredibly appreciative if their partner chose to cook for them. Most… but not all

    Image credits: Elina Fairytale / Pexels (not the actual photo)

    This woman shared how her husband, who never had an issue with her food, insulted her cooking in public

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    Image credits: wayhomestudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: SHVETS production / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    She later clarified a few details

    Image credits: Picklepiebanana

    Image credits:  Gustavo Fring / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Good, open, honest communication is the foundation of healthy relationships

    One of the most fundamental things that keeps romantic (and to be honest, any) relationships happy and healthy is open and honest communication. If you have an issue with your partner, you need to respect them enough to address it. But how you address it matters as much, if not more, than the facts that you share.

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    It’s common sense, but you shouldn’t go around insulting your significant other. It’s even worse if you criticize them publicly, in front of family or friends. You should address your problems privately and discreetly, without sounding like you’re accusing your partner of anything. Use lots of “I” statements, try to look for a compromise, and most definitely take their perspective into account.

    However, all of this requires being emotionally intelligent in the first place. That means being aware of your emotions as well as those of others, being able to manage how your feelings affect your behavior, and understanding how your behavior affects other people.

    If you never voice any concerns with your partner, only to burst out some particularly awful comments about them in public, you probably have low emotional intelligence.

    It’s also deeply dishonest to make your partner feel like everything is going well, only for you to twist things around by revealing your ‘true’ feelings.

    Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

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    Individuals with low emotional intelligence are unable to express their needs and are very impulsive

    Emotionally intelligent people tend to have better control over their emotions, are more effective communicators, are better decision makers, and tend to have healthier relationships. They are less impulsive, think before they react, and are more in-tune with their partner’s feelings. On the flip side, emotionally unintelligent individuals are often unable to express their needs, feelings, desires, or concerns.

    According to the Cleveland Clinic, one way to improve your emotional intelligence is to begin taking more responsibility for your actions, especially if they have negative consequences for others.

    A big part of this is setting your ego aside and being humble and open enough to ask others for feedback. That way, you’ll be clear about what you can do differently.

    Other ways to boost your emotional intelligence include setting and respecting healthy boundaries, as well as working on your active listening skills.

    “Setting healthy boundaries helps you protect your values and maintain your goals. But acknowledging and respecting other people’s boundaries is just as important, too. You never want to make someone feel unworthy, unsafe or disrespected. Do whatever you can to treat others the way you want to be treated,” the Cleveland Clinic explains.

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    Meanwhile, active listening means genuinely listening to the person you’re speaking with, not just waiting for your turn to speak. This requires your full focus and attention, as well as a genuine desire to understand their perspective.

    We’d like to hear your insights and perspectives in the comments, Pandas. How would you react if your partner insulted your cooking, or something else that you do, in front of your social circle? How do you divide up the household chores fairly at home? What would you do if your significant other complained about your food but refused to cook because they spent a ton of time video gaming?

    After reading the story, some folks asked for more context

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    Here’s how the internet reacted to the shocking relationship story. Most were very supportive of the woman

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    However, some internet users had a different, very unpopular take on things

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    Poll Question

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    Jonas Grinevičius

    Jonas Grinevičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

    Read more »

    Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real.At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design.In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle.I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

    Read less »
    Jonas Grinevičius

    Jonas Grinevičius

    Writer, Senior Writer

    Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real.At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design.In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle.I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    Read less »

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    What do you think ?
    Paul C
    Community Member
    16 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you hear someone complained to their parents, and got them to stand up for them, you just know that person is a childish AH. And the YTAs are crazy today - if someone has 4.5 hours a day to play computer games, on his working days, he does not work long hours.

    Tamra
    Community Member
    15 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one is great: "YTA Your husband works long hours and deserves a meal of his liking". She ALSO works long hours, does all the cooking, and I'm willing to bet carries the bulk of childcare. He can either suck it up and eat what's cooked, or forego video gaming and cook for himself. Beyond that, he's placing his own desires over what is a good learning experience for his children. Let the selfish AH eat at Mommy's house. Better yet, he can stay there.

    Bookworm
    Community Member
    7 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She says she does the majority of the childcare and cleaning.

    Load More Replies...
    Shark Lady
    Community Member
    15 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I went through a period in my life where I made three different meals at dinnertime, I strenuously don't recommend it. OPs husband needs to get over himself and speak to his wife in private if he has an issue, rather than trying to embarrass her in public. He also needs to keep his mother out of his marriage, or he will end up with no wife. He has 4.5hrs a night to game, which means he has enough time to cook his own meal, he isn't the breadwinner since his wife also earns enough to support the family, even though she does most of the homework and childcare.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    13 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How can you not have enough time to make yourself a simple meal? No energy, I can believe, but a stir fry takes ten minutes, making a sandwich or an omelette take less time and sticking a frozen pie in the oven takes even less. I assume with the English comment salad is not an option. Energy, not time, is my main obstacle so I I usually cook double or triple portions and then eat leftovers for a few days.

    Helena
    Community Member
    16 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is a grown man with full use of his limbs and faculties, he can make his own dam food. What does he think single truckers do?

    Sylvain
    Community Member
    12 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A grown man can cook for himself, so going whining to mommy for food he wants is childish at best. It sounds like he spends his free time alone and not being a father either. However, meals are a family decision and just deciding on your own with no alternatives for his tastes is bad too. Husband needs to grow up, wife needs to learn to communicate. Mainly NTA, tho.

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This guy can't make a sandwich?

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    11 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How does a father of 3 kids under 10, employed full time, find 4+ hours after work to game?

    meeeeeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    12 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only a baby can't make themselves dinner, even a toddler could make themselves some toast.

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would love it if someone was experimenting with food, and I got to try it. And anyone can make a sandwich.

    Miriam Insidecor
    Community Member
    5 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's married to a racist and pathetic idiot.

    Big Chungus
    Community Member
    6 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband must be a unicorn lol he is autistic so you would think food would be a harder deal, but in reality he doesn't really care if we cook and never complains. Half the time I don't even know if he eats dinner lol He may come in ask if I ate anything and then says ok and goes back to his man cave lol He has never ever expected me to make dinner. We both will make suggestions and decide from there and if I cook, he will help if I need it.

    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If dear hubby went crying to his mommy cuz his mean ol' wifey wouldn't cook separate meals for him, poor OP has a 4th child. Personally, I' stop cooking for him *at all* even if it's something he'd deign to eat.

    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    7 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom worked a full time job, did ALL of the house chores, made my dad's lunches every night for the next work day, while also essentially cooking two meals for 4-6 nights a week because my dad refused to eat the Japanese food that she wanted to eat because she didn't want to eat Western food every single night. All this because my dad worked a part time job, that we didn't really need, which I guess meant he didn't have to do anything around the house. Which, fine, whatever. But again, my mom also made him his and HER lunch every night, while also cooking two meals most nights, in addition to ALL of the housework. Stop catering to s****y spouses and partners. If OP's husband NEEDS someone to make him food (he doesn't) let him go back to mama since she's so up in arms about her poor son "sTarVinG".

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she should cook for him. But just toast sandwiches and pablum. Look at him pityingly and tell his that she is so sorry he can't eat Big Boy food yet. But his mommy worries that he will go hungry if he has to shift for himself and his widdle tummy-stummy can't handle what the rest of the family eats. It's the whiny-boy-took-it-to-others special. And put all the spices and seasonings in the house under lock and key.

    G A
    Community Member
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Raving Nigel Farage supporter, clearly. Get rid.

    Deborah B
    Community Member
    9 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he has time to game for 4+ hours, he has time to make himself a sandwich. If he disrespects your cooking to friends like that, he doesn't get to keep eating it. Dude needs to apologise, and should be making the family meal at least twice a week. Furthermore, if you don't have a "no gaming before the kids are in bed" rule, time to institute one. Why do women put up with such jackassery from men?

    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 hours ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, he's gone the vast majority of the time, and during that time he contributes nothing to the running of the home. When he is home, instead of actually spending time with his children and his wife, he plays video games for hours on end. When his needs aren't cater to, he humiliates his wife in front of friends and whines to his mommy. He sounds like the only thing he's good for is a child support check. She's obviously doing fine with him gone most of the time. I'd just transition that to gone all of the time.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    9 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother had two rules: you can eat what’s in front of you or you can complain but you cannot do both. Secondly, this isn’t Burger King and you don’t get it “your way”. My wise father began adhering to the rules early in their 64 year long marriage and would uncomplainingly eat an old boot if it was set out in front of him. He knows he has it good.

    Kkg
    Community Member
    11 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All 3 kids below 10 like cuisine from different, varied countries? I'll call that a BS.

    Paul C
    Community Member
    16 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you hear someone complained to their parents, and got them to stand up for them, you just know that person is a childish AH. And the YTAs are crazy today - if someone has 4.5 hours a day to play computer games, on his working days, he does not work long hours.

    Tamra
    Community Member
    15 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one is great: "YTA Your husband works long hours and deserves a meal of his liking". She ALSO works long hours, does all the cooking, and I'm willing to bet carries the bulk of childcare. He can either suck it up and eat what's cooked, or forego video gaming and cook for himself. Beyond that, he's placing his own desires over what is a good learning experience for his children. Let the selfish AH eat at Mommy's house. Better yet, he can stay there.

    Bookworm
    Community Member
    7 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She says she does the majority of the childcare and cleaning.

    Load More Replies...
    Shark Lady
    Community Member
    15 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I went through a period in my life where I made three different meals at dinnertime, I strenuously don't recommend it. OPs husband needs to get over himself and speak to his wife in private if he has an issue, rather than trying to embarrass her in public. He also needs to keep his mother out of his marriage, or he will end up with no wife. He has 4.5hrs a night to game, which means he has enough time to cook his own meal, he isn't the breadwinner since his wife also earns enough to support the family, even though she does most of the homework and childcare.

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    13 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How can you not have enough time to make yourself a simple meal? No energy, I can believe, but a stir fry takes ten minutes, making a sandwich or an omelette take less time and sticking a frozen pie in the oven takes even less. I assume with the English comment salad is not an option. Energy, not time, is my main obstacle so I I usually cook double or triple portions and then eat leftovers for a few days.

    Helena
    Community Member
    16 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He is a grown man with full use of his limbs and faculties, he can make his own dam food. What does he think single truckers do?

    Sylvain
    Community Member
    12 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A grown man can cook for himself, so going whining to mommy for food he wants is childish at best. It sounds like he spends his free time alone and not being a father either. However, meals are a family decision and just deciding on your own with no alternatives for his tastes is bad too. Husband needs to grow up, wife needs to learn to communicate. Mainly NTA, tho.

    Lee Gilliland
    Community Member
    Premium
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This guy can't make a sandwich?

    K Barnes
    Community Member
    11 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How does a father of 3 kids under 10, employed full time, find 4+ hours after work to game?

    meeeeeeeeeeee
    Community Member
    12 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only a baby can't make themselves dinner, even a toddler could make themselves some toast.

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would love it if someone was experimenting with food, and I got to try it. And anyone can make a sandwich.

    Miriam Insidecor
    Community Member
    5 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's married to a racist and pathetic idiot.

    Big Chungus
    Community Member
    6 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband must be a unicorn lol he is autistic so you would think food would be a harder deal, but in reality he doesn't really care if we cook and never complains. Half the time I don't even know if he eats dinner lol He may come in ask if I ate anything and then says ok and goes back to his man cave lol He has never ever expected me to make dinner. We both will make suggestions and decide from there and if I cook, he will help if I need it.

    Janelle Collard
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If dear hubby went crying to his mommy cuz his mean ol' wifey wouldn't cook separate meals for him, poor OP has a 4th child. Personally, I' stop cooking for him *at all* even if it's something he'd deign to eat.

    JayWantsACat
    Community Member
    7 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom worked a full time job, did ALL of the house chores, made my dad's lunches every night for the next work day, while also essentially cooking two meals for 4-6 nights a week because my dad refused to eat the Japanese food that she wanted to eat because she didn't want to eat Western food every single night. All this because my dad worked a part time job, that we didn't really need, which I guess meant he didn't have to do anything around the house. Which, fine, whatever. But again, my mom also made him his and HER lunch every night, while also cooking two meals most nights, in addition to ALL of the housework. Stop catering to s****y spouses and partners. If OP's husband NEEDS someone to make him food (he doesn't) let him go back to mama since she's so up in arms about her poor son "sTarVinG".

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she should cook for him. But just toast sandwiches and pablum. Look at him pityingly and tell his that she is so sorry he can't eat Big Boy food yet. But his mommy worries that he will go hungry if he has to shift for himself and his widdle tummy-stummy can't handle what the rest of the family eats. It's the whiny-boy-took-it-to-others special. And put all the spices and seasonings in the house under lock and key.

    G A
    Community Member
    8 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Raving Nigel Farage supporter, clearly. Get rid.

    Deborah B
    Community Member
    9 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he has time to game for 4+ hours, he has time to make himself a sandwich. If he disrespects your cooking to friends like that, he doesn't get to keep eating it. Dude needs to apologise, and should be making the family meal at least twice a week. Furthermore, if you don't have a "no gaming before the kids are in bed" rule, time to institute one. Why do women put up with such jackassery from men?

    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    9 hours ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, he's gone the vast majority of the time, and during that time he contributes nothing to the running of the home. When he is home, instead of actually spending time with his children and his wife, he plays video games for hours on end. When his needs aren't cater to, he humiliates his wife in front of friends and whines to his mommy. He sounds like the only thing he's good for is a child support check. She's obviously doing fine with him gone most of the time. I'd just transition that to gone all of the time.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    9 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother had two rules: you can eat what’s in front of you or you can complain but you cannot do both. Secondly, this isn’t Burger King and you don’t get it “your way”. My wise father began adhering to the rules early in their 64 year long marriage and would uncomplainingly eat an old boot if it was set out in front of him. He knows he has it good.

    Kkg
    Community Member
    11 hours ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All 3 kids below 10 like cuisine from different, varied countries? I'll call that a BS.

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