Have you ever called someone Captain Obvious or have been referred to as that yourself? If you have, it’s because some things are painfully obvious. Though, not for everyone.
For some people, it takes time to learn something that is considered common knowledge for others. In some cases, it might even take years. That was the case with at least a few people on today’s list, who admitted being oblivious to certain information after one netizen started a discussion on the topic. Their “confessions” covered everything from staring at the sun to buying individual bananas, and figuring out what peppers are exactly, among other things. So if you’re curious to see what else their comments entailed, scroll down to find them on the list below.
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That the reason old people move so slowly is that they are in pain.
Source: Am now old person.
I didn't realize how much I interrupted people while they were talking until one person didn't let me. They bulldozed right over whatever the f**k I had to add. I'm much more aware now.
That percentages work both ways. 50% of 7 (3.5) is the same as 7% of 50 (3.5).
The Romantic languages aren't called that because oh pretty, they're called that because they descend from Latin, which was spoken in Rome… they're Roman-tic languages.
I had no idea that peanuts grow underground until the other day when I saw a video on reddit. I think I always assumed they grew on like, I dunno, a peanut tree? Peanut bush? I was flabbergasted.
That your stomach growling and feeling hungry can also be a sign of thirst.
I was 50 when I figured out (52 now, btw.) that the little piggy that "went to market"...wasn't going shopping.
Edit: I talked to my wife about the poem and she pointed out:
This little piggy went to market - off to be slaughtered.
This little piggy stayed home - The mother pig
This little piggy had roast beef - Being fattened for the market
This little piggy had none - fat enough, being sold tomorrow
This little piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home - actually, apparently, the source of this is French, and the piggy is crying "oui, oui, oui!" all the way home because it escaped from the slaughterhouse. It's crying "Yes, yes, yes!" all the way home.
I thought when people said you *can’t* stare at the sun it was because it was a really hard thing to do, like a skill- rather than the truth which is it damages your eyes horribly.
So I’d boast at how I could stare for up to 3mins before I had to look away...
Glad I didn’t take “you can’t breathe underwater” literally too.
A fortnight is called that because its fourteen nights...
I had to explain to my mother, sister and boyfriend that cobwebs are leftover spider webs that collected dust, not just dust magically stringing together
Edit: guys they have to be abandoned to collect dust there aren't spiders in them anymore it's ok.
I thought it was normal to get a little burning sensation in your throat when you eat hazelnuts, turns out I was allergic.
White, green, and black tea can be from the same plant; just picked at different times.
EDIT: Yes, it's also a drying/oxidizing process as well.
Yes, all true tea comes from the same plant (Camellia sinensis) and is just processed differently. The other stuff that is often called 'tea' in the US is more correctly called herbal infusions, aka 'herbal tea'. There is a pretty good video on youtube of a man who owns a small(ish) tea factory where he walks through each of the steps they do to produce the different kinds of tea. When they pick, how long they let it dry, how long they ferment it, how much they bruise it and so on.
When I was in 9th grade, I found out that narwhals are REAL. Always just assumed they were mythical. C'mon, dolphin-like creatures with a unicorn horn?
My SIL thought they were imaginary because the only place she'd seen one was in the movie Elf. We love teasing her about it. :) And it's really a tooth not a horn.
Just me, realizing just how little I actually know. But a drop in the ocean. That I did not listen to people, instead just waiting to butt in and say something stupid. That I was passing judgment on people without understanding their situation first. Thinking I was open minded but was actually rather ignorant and closed minded. Offering advice to people who didn’t ask for it. Thinking I was a forgiving person but held grudges. Allowed myself to be triggered by what others said, biting the bait. Giving advice to others on how to live their lives but not providing a good example. Expected respect but not being respectful.
As an introvert, it's recently come to my attention that some people actually like talking. What I mean to say is, I've started talking to people more because I thought everyone was like me and didn't want to be bothered with conversation much, but it's amazing to think that that's something that's unique to me, some people can talk and enjoy it.
That's not to say I don't like talking, I just get super exhausted talking for too long, but it's just mind boggling to me that people actually want to talk and seek it out and can do it all the time. I need a bit to recover from a conversation.
I'm almost 30, and am just discovering this, apparently I'm slow.
It's also what people talk about, like I've never really been good at small talk, I feel like I just have nothing to talk about, but when I paid attention to people I realised they will just talk about anything, what they're having for dinner later, a TV show they watched, what they're wearing to a baby shower, like people just enjoy talking about anything so I pretty much learnt to do the same.
That the christmas song that goes "I saw mommy kissing santa claus" is not actually about infidelity. The father was santa claus the whole time!
That ponies are not baby horses.
My friend thought Reindeer were just a christmas related mythical animal until he was 18.
And their eyes change colour depending on the season. Gold in summer and blue in winter.
I legitimately thought you "grew" pickles.... Like underwater.
I'm not a smart man.
'Pickles' are just one of a variety of pickled products really though. In my country it's more of a generic term than one specific product - eg pickled gherkins, pickled eggs, pickled cabbage, pickled beetroot...
Condensation is water from the atmosphere turning liquid on the outside of a glass due to how cold the glass is. It’s NOT because water from inside the glass magically phases through the glass outside. I regret that it took be 17 years to find this out, even though I passed AP chemistry and AICE biology...
I actually have to talk to women if I want to ever meet any.
I thought the semicolon tattoo was for people who had Crohn's disease or colon cancer or something and had lost part of their colon.
"Semicolon tattoos are symbols of hope. Those with anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues may get a semicolon tattooed on the inside of their wrist as a reminder that they've chosen to continue their story despite the challenges they've faced."
I was told a couple weeks ago that hay was just dried grass, I thought it was its own thing that grew and I just never saw it.
Yup. You have to prepare it a certain way though. Randomly picked dry grass isn't really hay. And there are different kinds of hay based on the type of grass. Timothy hay is usually what we feed horses, although alfalfa is popular too. Alfalfa has more calories and is more expensive to buy. And straw is not the same as hay - it's dried grain stalks and shouldn't be eaten.
The bald spot on the back of my head. I mean, I knew it was there for a few years, but last month we moved into a new house and the upstairs bathroom has a large wall mirror across from the vanity mirror. So now every morning while I brush my teeth all I can do is stare at my bald spot. All this time I've been walking around like this unaware of just how large and obvious it was.
Reminds me of a story my coworker told me about how he found out he was going bald. Family at the beach, playing in the sun. He comments his head is a little sore. His wife: "Well, your bald spot is getting a bit sunburned." Him: "What bald spot?" LOL EDIT: Maybe my coworkers situation is more common than I realized. Now when something like this makes me think of that story I find myself reaching up and feeling the crown of my head to see if I'm next. :)
Oh, mine is bad.
Until the age of 19 I didn't realize that the handicap symbol was a guy in a wheelchair. I thought it was a character from some Asian language that meant handicapped.
It was a mindf**k the first time I realized what it actually was.
I swear this is the only other one I have.
My family was terribly, terribly poor until my teenage years. When I was 14, we went down to a sit-down restaurant for the first time. I ordered a burger, as was my way. Now, I had no idea what grades of cooking existed as it just wasn't something that had come up.
>**Me**: I'd like a cheeseburger please Miss.
>
>**Waitress**: Medium?
>
>**Me**: No, large please.
Needless to say, that was embarrassing.
Aw... if you've not had the experience before you can't know. Though must admit I'm usually asked 'how would you like it cooked' and the options listed, rather than just asked 'medium'?
That honey is mostly sugar..
Toddlo:
I sold honey door to door as a kid. Once a guy came to the door and I gave him my sales pitch, he stated that he couldn’t have sugar because he was diabetic. I assured him that the honey was pure and sugar free. He bought two tubs.
I had an Aunt Grace. I thought the song Amazing Grace was about a woman named Grace for my entire childhood, at least, and only yesterday sat down and consciously realized it wasn't. I'm in my sixties.
In school I had a friend named Grace (she was from a Catholic family, no less) and kind of assumed the song was about her too, and especially since it was her favourite! I miss her.
I said "thingers" instead of "fingers" for an embarrassingly long time of my life. It always went in my brain that you use thingers to pick up things with.
Some people say fumbs instead of thumbs... My husband has a mild speech impediment!
That absolutely everyone is going through some hardship of some sort. Some are just more skilled at hiding or compartmentalizing it, and we all have our own way of dealing with it or trying to escape it.
I’ve realized that I don’t actually like the taste of alcohol. I started drinking because I thought it was the thing to do when you grow up and become an adult. Almost a year without a drop now, I don’t miss it one bit.
It’s a big step to realize that you don’t like alcohol. Many people drink it because they’re expected to, and never consider whether they actually like it, until they can’t function without it, at which point you can’t simply decide you don’t like it—it takes effort to stop drinking at that point.
It's called a K-9 unit because *Canines*!
I thought it was just a random letter-number designation, because you know, everything needs a name.
That chores while still being a chore can in fact feel good once they are completed and not just a burden. Now I do chores and it relaxes me a bit kind of takes me put of my own head. If I'm angry...find a chore to do. If I'm bored...find a chore to do. It makes everything seem less chaotic at times.
I always thought John Doe was a very popular person, until I realised it's a placeholder name.
My roommate and I googled “what is pepper?” the other day because we realized we had no clue if black pepper was a plant or a mineral...
Edit: it’s a plant.... I’ve just never seen a peppercorn tree.
Edit 2: I get it, it’s not a mineral.
I didn't know babies only drink milk for the first six months and that water can be toxic for them. Learned that in r/JUSTNOMIL.
That as a person with a vulva, I can simply slide over the c****h of my swimsuit to pee! No need to take off my wet, cold one-piece and drag it back on again after I pee! My husband shared this magical method with me - I was 42.
Different wines are named after the grape used to make the wine. I didn't realize there were different kinds of grapes, I guess? I thought that it was just green grapes = white wine / red grapes = red wine and that whatever makes it a shiraz or a merlot or whatever was some other magical s**t that happens in the barrels.
Horses scratch themselves behind their ears just like a dog does, i.e. with their hind legs.
Not all of them do it though. They use their teeth too. And they scratch each other as well. I had one horse who would try to groom me when I scratched her in a certain spot. Mutual grooming I guess. :)
When I moved to the states I kept wondering what "ped xing" with a guy crossing the road meant. I knew it meant that somebody was crossing the road but how did xing meant "crossing"?! A decade later I realized it, x=cross.
EDIT: Thanks guys I hope I have enlightened you all.
That the the division sign is just an incomplete fraction
÷ x/x.
Royal family's last name is Windsor.
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha --> Windsor. The Battenberg --> Mountbatten change was Prince Philip's maternal grandparents. He took their surname in 1947 (instead of continuing to use his Greek and Danish royal titles) when he became a British subject.
That the Autobahn is the entire highway system in Germany, not just a single road that you can drive really fast on.
That squidward and squilliam from Spongebob are just the names Edward and William but with "squi" in the beginning.
The other day I just realized that “emo” was short for “emotional” - I always just assumed it was its own word completely, haha.
It took me until I was like 10 years old to understand that you are supposed to close your eyes when trying to fall asleep. Until that point I just laid in bed staring at the ceiling wondering why I’m still awake.
As a kid, I sometimes had to make an effort to keep my eyes closed when trying to fall asleep, because for some reason they just opened on their own unless I used the muscles to shut the eyelids
An airport is a port - like where ships dock - but for airplanes.
Tangential: at both airports and ship ports, the word 'terminal' describes locations for loading/unloading passengers, cargo and supplies. But for trains a terminal is the end point of a route. Eg: Grand Central is a terminal, not a station, because all its train lines terminate there.
Email addresses are not case sensitive.
Dogs like squeaky toys because they sound like dying prey.
Looks like you were duped again, because no. Has anyone heard a predator catch prey? They don't squeak. They shriek, they scream. Sounds nothing like it. Know what other animal loves toys with squeakers? Human toddlers. Interacting with an object, that object making a sound in response to that interaction, and knowing that you made it do that? To a toddler, that is way fun! Again again! Dog intelligence, by current studies, is equivalent to that of a toddler. The toy making a sound in response to their actions is fun!
Funny I was about 31 when my girlfriend of all people pointed out that gas tank direction sign to me, she felt so proud of herself that day and didn't let me live it down.
When you go the liquor store the good liquor is on the "Top shelf". The cr**py liquor is Always on the bottom shelf.
That not all chicken eggs are fertilized. And I grew up in the country around animals and went to an Ag College.
Hens that have mated store the "seed" and can selectively fertilize eggs as she lays them. So, a hen can lay both fertilized and unfertilized eggs. Fertilized eggs don't develop unless incubated. You have probably eaten a fertilized egg.
Balloon fish inhale water to expand ... Not air.
Gonna blame Nemo for that.
TIL some people call puffer fish "balloon fish". And apparently also a number of other names. -- "Tetraodontidae is a family of marine and freshwater fish in the order Tetraodontiformes. The family includes many familiar species variously called pufferfish, puffers, balloonfish, blowfish, blowers, blowies, bubblefish, globefish, swellfish, toadfish, toadies, toadle, honey toads, sugar toads, and sea squab."
Cigarettes are just a cute name baby cigars. I never made that connection for some reason.
Not just "baby" (smaller), but also cheaper, made with shredded not rolled tobacco, wrapped in paper not tobacco leaves, usually loaded with chemical additives, and not as richly flavored as cigars. Also, you don't inhale cigar smoke into your lungs, you savor it in your mouth.
One of my mates only realised Elton John was gay when the TV commentary at the royal wedding talked about him and his husband.
That when it itches (like if you have an itch on your leg or something), it helps to scratch back. I remember complaining to someone when I was around ten, that I had an itch, and he said "well, scratch it". I was really surprised that it worked.
It’s called a coincidence because two events co-incide.
No. Coincidence and coincide have the same Mediaeval Latin origin word (coincidere; "to fall upon together"), but took different routes into English. Coincidence slid through French "coincidence" and was introduced in the 17th century as "occurrence or existence during the same time.", likely through the writings of Thomas Browne. Coincide came through French too, but from "coïncider", in the 18th century with the meanings "be identical in substance or nature; occupy the same space; agree in position", with the "occur at the same time" of coincide meaning first appearing in the 19th century.
Fez wasn't his name. Its FES for foreign exchange student.
He is referring to the character "FES" (played by Wilmer Valderrama) on "That 70's Show"
The Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star are the same song. Took me WAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY too long to figure that out.
Life is easier if you relax, appreciate what you have and stop trying to control the world around you.
💯% this. Many times in my life people have been suprised at me for having low ambition. I'm relatively poor, have everything I *want* in life, and have no plan on having any kids. I'm also waaaaay happier in life than the majority of people that tell me I have to want more. No. I don't. They do. I worked hard, aimed low, and got where I'm happy to be. I'll just continue being my happy self. For some reason, this totally pisses some people off.
That my 67-year old mom dyes her hair and has been for years. I never questioned why her hair was red in my baby pictures but why she's blonde now. I'm like, "Well her hair just changed." Y'know, like how tons of people have their hair go from red to blonde!!
Hair colour does change, though. I was born with dark hair, was blonde by the time I was 4 or 5, light brown in teens and adulthood, and now I look like a skunk with stripes of grey and silver!
Pancakes are cakes cooked in a pan.
::screams at the stock photo:: Get those forks away from that nonstick pan!!
Paper comes from trees on tree farms. It didn't occur to me until I met someone in college who had grown up on one that trees were something that could be farmed - I honestly believed that they were cutting down trees in forests and jungles to make paper (and firewood, furniture, etc.) and that this was the cause of deforestation.
You need to check your tire pressure when the weather gets cold.
You can buy individual bananas. I always thought you had to buy them in bunches.
I am 30 years old.
That waaay back in the day, we had this messenger thing called ICQ.
it actually means "I seek you".
young me's mind was a thoroughly blown.
Ferrero Rocher have Nutella in them.
I used to work at a fancy Italian pizza place. One of the deserts was a pizza dough stuffed with Nutella and bananas, folded over like a pizza pop and cooked. Then sliced and drizzled with chocolate sauce, caramel sauce, and whipped cream. Mmmm 😊
NABISCO = NAtional BIScuit COmpany.
I always thought it was just a funny name.
Miles Prower A.K.A. Tails from Sonic is a pun on Miles per hour.
My fiancee gave me that, "wow I'm about to marry you" look when she made me realize Nilla wafers were VA-Nilla. I somehow missed that.
They changed the name. When I was a kid in the 60s the were Vanilla Wafers.
Chips ahoy is a play on words of the nautical term ships ahoy.
Camcorder.
A CAMera reCORDER.
Because the camera and the recorder used to be two separate things. TV news photographers had a camera on their shoulder and a U-Matic recorder on a shoulder strap. Everything was powered from a battery belt.
I thought gunpoint and knifepoint were real places. I promised myself I'd never go near them since it seemed like everyone who went there got robbed. I was about 14 or 15 when it clicked.
In my mid-30s i learned i need to actively resist clinical depression.
i had thought it was cyclical and i needed to let it run its course.
upon learning this, i felt a lot of regret and shame for having wasted so much time wallowing.
I let me Depression out every so often to play or She gets ornery.
I found out that a Perm is short for Permanent and not just a hair style but saying the type of hair style is Permament.
Permanent wave is the full term. I made the mistake of getting one in the 80's. Wish I hadn't!
Sitcom= Situational Comedy, felt like a d**n fool when I found out.
I was probably in my 20s, but the fact that odd-numbered highways run North-South and Even-numbered highways run East-West.
Also, the numbers increase as you travel East and North, so San Diego has I-5 and I-8 running through it, and Boston has I-90 and I-95 running through it.
Ampersand (&) is from "and, per se, and". It used to be recited after Z in the alphabet.
That Wednesday is called hump day because it’s the middle of the week, so you’re getting ‘over the hump’. I always thought it was a s*x thing.
That mermaids were fictional.
It wasn't anything like "Well, everyone says they're not real but i think they are", it was more like nobody told me any different and i never really thought about it.
I just found out two days ago that “lock/unlock” portion of car keys is called a fob.
The under armor logo isn’t an x, but a u and an a.
I realized a year or two ago that laffy taffy was called laffy taffy because there were jokes on the wrapper. I'm 23 and laffy taffy was one of my favorite candies as a kid.
That Eeyore was named for the sound a donkey makes. Someone pointed this out to me a while back; blew my mind.
Also, I only found out a couple years ago that "troll" refers to someone dangling bait on a hook in the ocean, waiting for a fish to come along and bite. I'd always thought it was because anyone who'd waste people's time with b******t was a monster, hence, "troll." (Because trolls, as opposed to vampires or weres or what have you, are stupid, ugly bastards rather than s**y or immortal.).
Dallas Green of the band City and Colour. His name is both a city and a color.
I listened to him for years before it clicked.
Omg this actually just hit me like yesterday 😂 I was driving by myself listening to some old City & Colour and was suddenly like “OH!”
That I can just unzip my pants to relieve myself as opposed to also unbuttoning them.
I know this one has been pointed out often, but the D in the Disney logo was not actually a G.
Your job is NOT IMPORTANT.
I disagree. I've had many people come up to me over the years and tell me I was their favourite teacher and because of me they finally understood some concept that helped them in school/university/etc. Others have thanked me for bringing sandwiches for them when their parents couldn't afford to provide lunch. Don't tell me that's not important.
That the song, “Centerfield” by John Fogerty is about baseball… I had never really listened to the whole thing, and I always thought it was about flying coach in an airplane. 🤦♀️.
When people say “the Midwest”, they really mean a region in the Eastern USA.
"Essential oils" aren't "essential" for anything. They're highly concentrated extracts that retain the fundamental properties of whatever plant they're derived from and the oil has the *essence* of it. So "essential" only means "the essence of" it doesn't mean it's *necessary* in any way.
Actually, there are flower “essences” and they are purer and less dodgy than essential oils, many of which have ingredients that can cause reactions on skin.
Load More Replies...That no matter how hard I try, someone will always be better and that I’m just wasting my time
You are not wasting your time, because you are valued and loved by me! I've missed seeing your comments/talking with you - hope you are doing as well as you can be <3
Load More Replies...My mother (the one I noted called the big round hay bales 'tractor eggs') later told me that brown eggs come from brown chickens. Due to past experience,s I did not believe her.
That reminds me of when I was a small child XD My mother used to insist that the word purple was pronounced "poi-pull". She would pronounce it that way as if it was normal to say it that way, and I would say "No, it's 'purr-pull'." She would then just keep pronouncing it incorrectly and laugh as I got more agitated. She probably thought it was hilarious, but at the time I thought I was losing my mind or that there was something wrong with me XD She also occasionally used to call me "Penelope" as if that was my actual name (it is not; my name is Crystal.) It wasn't like she was using it as a nickname, she would just occasionally... call me Penelope instead of Crystal in normal conversation. I seriously thought I was going crazy as a kid. Now that I'm an adult, I realize that what my mother did was actually pretty mean.
Load More Replies..."Essential oils" aren't "essential" for anything. They're highly concentrated extracts that retain the fundamental properties of whatever plant they're derived from and the oil has the *essence* of it. So "essential" only means "the essence of" it doesn't mean it's *necessary* in any way.
Actually, there are flower “essences” and they are purer and less dodgy than essential oils, many of which have ingredients that can cause reactions on skin.
Load More Replies...That no matter how hard I try, someone will always be better and that I’m just wasting my time
You are not wasting your time, because you are valued and loved by me! I've missed seeing your comments/talking with you - hope you are doing as well as you can be <3
Load More Replies...My mother (the one I noted called the big round hay bales 'tractor eggs') later told me that brown eggs come from brown chickens. Due to past experience,s I did not believe her.
That reminds me of when I was a small child XD My mother used to insist that the word purple was pronounced "poi-pull". She would pronounce it that way as if it was normal to say it that way, and I would say "No, it's 'purr-pull'." She would then just keep pronouncing it incorrectly and laugh as I got more agitated. She probably thought it was hilarious, but at the time I thought I was losing my mind or that there was something wrong with me XD She also occasionally used to call me "Penelope" as if that was my actual name (it is not; my name is Crystal.) It wasn't like she was using it as a nickname, she would just occasionally... call me Penelope instead of Crystal in normal conversation. I seriously thought I was going crazy as a kid. Now that I'm an adult, I realize that what my mother did was actually pretty mean.
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