Couple Refuse To Let Guy Bring A Plus-One To Wedding He’s Hosting, Now Have A Bigger Problem

To plus-one or not to plus-one? Here’s a question that probably every couple asks themselves when curating their wedding guest list. On one hand, allowing guests to bring a person with them can make them more comfortable and at ease. On the other hand, such an option isn’t always possible, whether that’s due to budget limitations, not being familiar with the individual, or preventing clashing between invitees.

When this guy, whose backyard was used for a friend’s wedding, was denied a plus-one because of his ex, he wasn’t going to let it go easily. Once talking some sense into the couple failed, he then took some extreme measures, which risked the whole celebration.

Scroll down to find the full story and a conversation with Irene Katzias, wedding planner and founder of Irene + Co Events, who kindly agreed to tell us more about plus-ones at weddings.

To plus-one or not to plus-one is completely up to the couple that is planning their wedding

Man sitting distressed in living room, wearing a light shirt, tattoo on forearm, related to backyard wedding dispute.

Image credits:  PerfectWave003/Envato (not the actual photo)

However, when this guy, whose backyard was used for a friend’s wedding, was denied  a plus-one, he became quite disappointed

Text about refusing friends use of a backyard for a wedding; plus-one denial.

Text discusses discovering a partner's secret debt before buying a house together.

Text about a breakup and relationships between people, including Leslie and Dave's connections.

Text about a man's friends wanting a backyard wedding, but he started dating again.

Text describing conflict over plus-one at a wedding in a message.

Text from a message where a man refuses friends' request to use his backyard for their wedding due to a denied plus-one.

Text about finding a new venue, expressing frustration over wedding timing and decision impasse.

Backyard with lush garden, wooden house, and small bridge, reflecting serene ambiance.

Image credits: benzoix/Envato (not the actual photo)

Text detailing insurance coverage for events, highlighting liability awareness and reimbursement for special event insurance.

Text discussing wedding guest limits, catering, and security for an outdoor area.

Text discussing property layout with cottages and bathrooms during a wedding event.

Text explaining single guests received a wedding invitation with a plus-one, including the author and Leslie.

Text discussing refusal over wedding plus-one request.

Text discussing wedding invite and bringing a guest.

Image credits: Long_Assistant8873

How to solve the plus-one dilemma depends on a couple

Wedding couple kissing in backyard ceremony, surrounded by friends in blue dresses, amid scattered flower petals.

Image credits: Leonardo Miranda/Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Every couple wants their guests to have the best time ever during their celebration. But does this mean that everyone should get a plus-one at a wedding? “Not necessarily,” says Irene Katzias, wedding planner and founder of Irene + Co Events.

“Your guest list should be intentional, not a free-for-all. If you are working within a set budget or a specific vision for your day, plus-ones should be considered, not assumed. Prioritize your inner circle, then extend plus-one invitations where it makes sense. Your wedding is not a networking event. It is a curated day created just for you,” she explained.

The people who usually receive a plus-one invitation are the wedding party, close friends and family, married guests, and those who traveled from far away or don’t know anyone besides the couple at the event.

However, invitees who are casually dating, work together with the bride or groom, or aren’t close friends or family members (who know people besides the couple at the function) don’t typically get the privilege of bringing an extra person to the celebration.

“If they are not in a serious, committed relationship, if your venue has strict capacity limits, or if your budget says absolutely not, then it is completely fine to keep your guest list tight,” agrees Katzias. “A good rule of thumb is if you would not recognize their plus-one in a lineup, you do not have to invite them. Your wedding day is about celebrating your love story, not accommodating every acquaintance’s date-night request.”

To prevent unpleasantries, couples should explain their plus-one policies on the invitations

Wedding invitation cards neatly arranged in a tray on a table with decorative vases in the background.

Image credits: Ricardo Moura/Envato (not the actual photo)

While the decision on who to bless with a plus-one and who not is the couple’s to make based on their best interest, some people, just like the author of the story, might not be happy to receive an invitation for one. 

To prevent any unpleasantries related to this, couples should explain their plus-one policies on the invitations, said wedding planner, stylist, and consultant Cait Noonan from Celebrait Wedding Co. in a previousBored Panda interview. 

“A short and sweet message to say, ‘The capacity of our venue is limited and hence we kindly request that only those invited attend our wedding. Please check your invitation for details around plus-ones,’ and then only write “and guest” on the envelopes and invitations of those guests to whom you are offering a plus-one to,” she explained.

If a guest still asks to bring an extra person, Katzias recommends being direct, kind, and firm. “Try something like, ‘We are keeping our wedding intimate and unfortunately are not able to extend plus-ones to everyone. We would still love for you to be there and celebrate with us.’ If they care about you, they will respect your decision. Your wedding is not a group outing.”

In case the guest takes even more extreme measures and refuses to attend the event, Katzias advises not giving much thought to it. “If they bail over a plus-one, that is on them. You are not holding anyone hostage. If someone shows up on the wedding day with an uninvited guest, that is a different level of bold. Your coordinator or venue team can discreetly handle it, whether that means letting them know there is no available seating or offering an unsubtle redirect to the nearest exit. Boundaries exist for a reason,” she concluded.

Some readers disagreed with the couple, saying the man should do whatever he wants on his land

Two comments discussing a man refusing to let friends use his backyard for their wedding, referencing banning Leslie.

Online discussion about backyard wedding dispute and denied plus-one request; commenters express support for homeowner.

Reddit thread discussing a man's refusal to let friends use his backyard for a wedding after plus-one denial.

Comment on a situation where friends want to control backyard use, calling it unreasonable.

Reddit comment discussing conflict over backyard wedding and denied plus-one.

Reddit comment discussing friends' wedding, referencing backyard usage and plus-one denial.

Text exchange discussing wedding decisions and friendship impacts in a backyard setting.

Reddit comment advising a man on not letting friends use his backyard for their wedding without a legal agreement.

Reddit comment criticizing friends benefiting from generosity without respect.

Text screenshot discussing refusal of backyard use for wedding due to denied plus-one request.

Text post discussing being excluded from social events after a relationship issue.

Text comment discussing a backyard wedding situation where friends denied a plus-one request.

Screenshot of a comment advising against hosting a backyard wedding due to technical and legal issues.

Reddit comment supporting man's decision about backyard wedding refusal.

Comment on man refusing backyard wedding use after denial of plus-one.

Text from a user discussing a wedding plus-one issue and backyard refusal.

Reddit comment discussing a man refusing friends' wedding in his backyard after being denied a plus-one.

Reddit comment about a man refusing friends' wedding use of backyard after being denied a plus-one guest.

Reddit comment criticizing a backyard wedding plan due to plus-one denial.

Reddit comment about a man refusing backyard wedding after being denied a plus-one.

Comment on refusing backyard for wedding after plus-one denied by friends.

Text conversation about backyard wedding plus-one issue, mentioning property concerns and pet care during event.

Reddit comment supporting man for refusing backyard wedding due to no plus-one invite.

Reddit comment supporting man refusing backyard wedding use after friends deny plus-one.

Text screenshot discussing refusal to use backyard for a wedding due to denial of a plus-one.

Online comment about refusing backyard usage for a wedding over denial of a plus-one.

Reddit comment discussing a man refusing friends' use of his backyard for a wedding.

Comment supporting man refusing to let friends use backyard for wedding.

Reddit comment discussing friends denying a plus-one for a wedding in the man's backyard.

Reddit comment offering legal advice on using land for a wedding, focusing on vendor contracts and insurance coverage.

Comment discusses man refusing backyard for wedding as alternative venue after denied plus-one.

Reddit comment discussing refusal to host a wedding after being denied a plus-one.

Reddit comment discussing refusing friends' wedding in backyard over plus-one issue.

Screenshot of a comment about refusing backyard use for a wedding after being denied a plus-one.

Text conversation discussing refusal to lend backyard for wedding over denied plus-one request.

Comment discussing refusal of using backyard for wedding due to plus-one denial.

Text from a comment thread discussing a backyard wedding situation.

Reddit comment about backyard wedding conflict over plus-one denial.

Reddit comment discussing a man's decision to refuse his backyard for a wedding over a plus-one dispute.

Comment discussing refusal of backyard for wedding due to denied plus-one.

Text comment discussing refusal to let friends use backyard for wedding after denying a plus-one.

While others thought the original poster was in the wrong here

Reddit comment discussing refusal of backyard use for wedding due to denial of plus-one.

Text screenshot discussing relationship dynamics and friendships after a breakup.

Reddit comment about wedding photos and a relationship status, with username visible.

Text from an online comment discussing a story about a man denying wedding use of his backyard over plus-one refusal.

Text discussing wedding invite issues: man refuses backyard use after denied plus-one.

Text comment discussing a man refusing friends' wedding use of his backyard after not receiving a plus-one invitation.

Reddit comment discusses a wedding refusal over a denied plus-one and property use.

Text comment discussing differences in bringing "a date" versus "my date.

Comment on being a good friend after man denies backyard for wedding over plus-one issue.

Comment questioning the need for a plus-one at a wedding, impacting friendship.

Online comment discussing a breakup and labeling someone as a "crazy ex.

Text comment discussing refusal of plus-one for a backyard wedding.

Comment discussing wedding and plus-one drama, suggesting attending but warning about Leslie's behavior.

Comment on relationship issues and financial honesty, mentioning wedding and backyard use refusal over guest list disagreement.

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