Mom Says She’s “Too Busy” To Pick Up Her Abandoned Kid, Loses It When Told CPS Might Be Called

One part of being a parent is arranging playdates with your kids’ friends. It’s not always easy; parents don’t always make friends as easily as kids do. Still, around 43% of parents say “yes” to playdates when they stay themselves. And only 22% let their kids go to playdates alone.

This woman, however, didn’t let the mom know her daughter was coming over for a playdate. When the girl came to her during pick-up at school, she was mildly surprised. But when her mother wouldn’t pick up the phone or her daughter hours later, the mom had had enough and threatened to call CPS.

A mom got a surprise one day when she was picking her daughter up from school

A smiling girl sits in a car seat, suggesting playdate excitement.

Image credits: leszekglasner / envato (not the actual photo)

Her daughter’s classmate claimed they were supposed to have a playdate, but the mom knew nothing about it

Text about a woman setting boundaries with another mom regarding babysitting duties after past play dates.

Text about a mom being confused when her daughter's friend expects a play date without prior planning.

Text message about mom assuming another will babysit her daughter without asking, disrupting planned mother-daughter time.

Text screenshot about a mom assuming another mom will babysit her daughter due to past play dates.

Text exchange about a woman assuming babysitting duties due to past play dates, highlighting a miscommunication.

Woman on phone in kitchen, looking worried, discussing babysitting and play dates with another mom.

Image credits: ionadidishvili / envato (not the actual photo)

Text conversation where a woman refuses to babysit, leading to an argument over play date expectations.

Image credits: Mommyk_Record3660

People pleasing can cause lots of regrets, so it’s useful to learn how to say a firm “no”

The author of this post writes how she often gets in these types of situations because she finds it hard to say “no”. This can be even harder when dealing with parents in your close network; you never know when you might need a favor or help yourself.

But people pleasing is rarely a good thing. And the author herself admits that in her post, saying how she regrets picking up “May” and breaking a promise to her own daughter. This is one of the advantages of learning to say “no”, as experts say that it minimizes regret.

“Being able to say no to people means that you’ll have more time to devote your energy to the things that really matter to you,” according to Elizabeth Scott, PhD.

But that’s not the only advantage of learning to say “no”. It also demonstrates that you know how to set clear boundaries. Saying “no” when people keep taking your help for granted lets them know how you expect to be treated.

If the person we keep saying “yes” to is someone who bothers us constantly, then saying “no” to them might even lessen our feelings of resentment towards them. “If you say yes when you really want to say no, you may end up resenting the person who made the request,” Scott explains.

Saying “no” politely is almost an art form. You have to be assertive, but respectful. You have to express gratitude but know how to let them down gently. Jonathan Hermida, PCC, recommends being straightforward and offering a short, simple explanation. “The more often you say no, the easier it becomes,” he points out. “Practice assertiveness in all areas of your life until the new habit feels familiar.”

Parents are not obligated to always agree to do playdates

Two girls coloring at a picnic table, showcasing play date activities in an outdoor setting.

Image credits: Fellipe Ditadi / unsplash (not the actual photo)

Playdates are a great way for kids to socialize. It’s also an opportunity for parents to have a few hours for themselves, as the other parents can watch them for the time of the playdate. However, as a parent, you might not want to organize playdates with every parent that you meet. So, how do you politely decline a playdate invitation?

International Nanny Association credentialed nanny Michelle LaRowe Conover writes that offering a reasonable excuse might help. Say that you’re busy at that time, but don’t mention anything about a rain check. The last thing you want is for the other parents to think: “Maybe another time.”

Wanting to spend more time as a family is always a good excuse. “Most parents will respect a need for family time, especially if they’re feeling the same pressure,” Conover writes.

Lying about why you don’t want to attend a playdate, according to her, never plays out well. Even if honesty might hurt some feelings, it’s still better than risking getting caught lying that it’s your child who doesn’t want in on the playdate or that you have some important family function.

“Making up stories that are easily seen through makes you look dishonest and careless, so it’s best to stick as close to the truth as possible without being confrontational or needlessly hurtful,” Conover concludes.

The mom mostly regretted letting her daughter down: “I’m going to make it up to her big time”

Text messages discussing mom assuming babysitting duties due to past play dates and school responsibility.

Discussion on school pick-up confusion due to past play dates.

People in the comments wondered where the school was in all of this, as most schools don’t allow parents to pick up children who aren’t theirs

Text from an online forum discussing a mom assuming another mom will babysit her daughter.

Reddit comment advising police contact for assumed babysitting and child abandonment situation.

Reddit comment discussing a mom assuming another would babysit due to past playdates.

Reddit comment discussing assumptions about babysitting between moms after past play dates.

Text discussion on assumptions about a mom babysitting another's child due to previous play dates.

Text screenshot about babysitting misunderstanding and police involvement.

Forum post discussing a mom assuming another parent would babysit due to previous play dates.

Comment about babysitting after play dates ends poorly, urging better decisions next time.

Text conversation describing carpool and babysitting issues after playdates.

Comment suggesting to report an issue to school and CPS, part of a babysitting discussion.

Comment about mom refusing to babysit another's daughter, mentioning play dates.

Text conversation about mom assuming babysitting due to past play dates. School intervenes to contact parent.

Comment criticizing a mom for assuming babysitting due to past play dates, with user name and points visible.

Text from a forum discussing a mom assuming another will babysit due to past play dates.

Text response criticizing assumed babysitting responsibilities after play dates.

Comment criticizing a mom's decision on babysitting assumptions related to play dates.

Comment discussing approach to returning a child to school, emphasizing mandated reporters, without involving police.

Comment reacts to mom's assumption about babysitting based on past play dates.

Reddit comment discussing a woman’s response to assumptions about babysitting, play dates, and perceived weakness.

Comment discussing play dates and babysitting assumptions, suggesting police involvement.

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