MIL Reveals Her True Ugly Colors At Grandbaby’s Gender Reveal

Pregnancy can bring a lot of attention to expecting parents from their inner and even outer circles. While these people are probably well-meaning, constantly being in the spotlight during such a personal time can get overwhelming. So, in order to maintain some peace and normalcy, parents may decide to establish some boundaries. 

As did this couple. Well, at least they tried to, as the MIL with whom they tried to set the limits refused to listen to them. She even forced herself into their gender reveal, which she inevitably dampened with her unacceptable behavior. At a loss, the pregnant woman turned online for some advice on how to deal with the situation that had unfolded.

Scroll down to read the full story and a conversation with licensed clinical psychologist, certified executive coach, and consultant Dr. Anne Welsh; licensed psychotherapist Dr. Aerial Cetnar; and licensed therapist and perinatal mental health specialist Ashley Fields, who kindly agreed to share their insights about setting boundaries during pregnancy.

Personal space is very important during pregnancy

Couple hugging at outdoor gender reveal party with blue smoke indicating boy and balloons in background.

Image credits: Alexander Mass / pexels (not the actual photo)

This MIL completely ignored such a fact, butting her unwanted behavior into this family’s business

MIL screams No and cries during gender reveal party, causing a scene and trying to make the event about herself.

Text describing a gender reveal announcement causing tension with mother-in-law who reacts negatively and makes it about herself.

Text excerpt describing a mother-in-law's reaction and announcement on Facebook during a gender reveal conflict.

Text discussing telling husband to call MIL to take down a post after a gender reveal argument involving MIL screaming and making it about herself.

Text about pregnancy milestones and mother-in-law behavior during a gender reveal event, highlighting tension issues.

Pregnant woman standing as mother-in-law touches her belly during a tense gender reveal moment.

Image credits: pressfoto / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text excerpt about discomfort with physical touch during a gender reveal involving MIL drama and conflict.

MIL screams at gender reveal, disregards boundaries, and tries making the event about herself by touching her grandbaby’s stomach.

Text block describing a pandemic gender reveal where husband misses the ultrasound, leading to a Facebook Live gender reveal.

Text describing a MIL upset at a gender reveal, insisting on being told first despite others not wanting to know beforehand.

Text about a mother-in-law causing drama at a gender reveal by trying to make it about herself.

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Woman in pink sweater holding and looking at ultrasound photos related to gender reveal and family dynamics.

Image credits: Usman bloch / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text about MIL screaming at gender reveal and making it about her while raising her voice and criticizing the reveal method.

Text excerpt discussing a MIL upset at a gender reveal, agreeing to attend despite ongoing pandemic restrictions.

Text excerpt describing family gathering for a gender reveal with MIL causing drama during the event.

Text excerpt describing a MIL screaming and crying during a gender reveal after blue smoke bombs are lit.

Woman reacting with disbelief as MIL screams at gender reveal, causing an uncalled for meltdown during family event.

Middle-aged woman screaming indoors with frustration and anger, expressing intense emotions during a family gender reveal event.

Image credits: kues1 / freepik (not the actual photo)

MIL screams at gender reveal, crying and insisting smoke bombs revealed the wrong gender during family event.

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Text excerpt discussing MIL's selfish behavior and tension during a gender reveal and family drama situation.

Text on white background stating feelings of having to accept MIL's feelings about pregnancy and dealing with unfairness.

Text message apologizing for length and errors, expressing frustration about pregnancy and dealing with MIL at gender reveal.

Text disclaimer about MIL upset over gender reveal, emphasizing her attitude and misplaced anger towards the author.

Text post expressing disappointment in MIL’s behavior at a gender reveal event, highlighting the drama involved.

Text about distancing during pregnancy and postpartum due to COVID-19 concerns, mentioning MIL and baby.

Pregnant woman sitting on couch, looking stressed and holding her belly, reflecting tension at gender reveal event.

Image credits: photoroyalty / freepik (not the actual photo)

Text discussing a mother-in-law's strange behavior causing tension at a gender reveal event.

Text about appreciating comments and speaking up, related to MIL screaming at gender reveal event.

MIL screams at gender reveal party, causing tension and trying to shift the focus onto herself during the event.

Text on a white background reading I hope that she's realized her behavior was gross but I won't know until/when I see her next.

Image credits: Piper_Dear

Personal space and calmness are essential during pregnancy

Pregnant woman sitting on bed, holding a bowl of fruit and reading a book, calm before a gender reveal event.

Image credits: gpointstudio / freepik (not the actual photo)

All our interviewed mental health experts agree that personal space and calmness are essential during pregnancy.

“Pregnancy is a profound physical, emotional, and psychological transition, and maintaining a sense of autonomy over your body and your choices helps foster a healthy adjustment,” explains licensed clinical psychologist, certified executive coach, and consultant Dr. Anne Welsh.

“Yet something happens when a woman becomes visibly pregnant: her body often becomes treated as public property. People touch her belly without asking, comment on her size, and offer unsolicited advice. These are things they would never do outside of pregnancy. This can leave women feeling exposed, judged, and even invisible as a person apart from the pregnancy. Protecting personal space and peace is one way to affirm, ‘This is still my body, my experience, and my story to tell.'”

“Personal space and peace help expecting parents slow down, listen to their bodies, and tune into what they need, whether that’s rest, quiet, or just fewer opinions flying at them,” adds licensed psychotherapist Dr. Aerial Cetnar. “It’s a big life transition that requires a lot of mental preparation. Feeling grounded and safe matters, and that often starts with having room to breathe.”

If pregnant women’s personal space is invaded and boundaries are crossed, it may increase stress, which can have negative effects on the mom and baby.

“Studies have shown that increased stress can increase levels of cortisol for pregnant folks and fetuses. There is a correlation with a higher chance of preterm birth, lowered birth weights, increased risk of perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and other complications,” licensed therapist and perinatal mental health specialist Ashley Fields.

“When boundaries are repeatedly crossed, whether physically or emotionally, it can chip away at a woman’s sense of agency and increase stress,” additionally notes Dr. Welsh. “Research, including my own, has shown that this kind of unwanted attention can negatively affect body image during and after pregnancy. It can also contribute to feelings of anxiety, self-consciousness, or even resentment.”

When pregnant women’s boundaries are respected, they tend to feel more confident and supported

Pregnant woman with partner and mother-in-law touching belly during a gender reveal moment at home.

Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

On the other hand, when others respect pregnant women’s boundaries, they tend to feel more confident and supported, which is beneficial for their mental health and adjustment to motherhood, says Dr. Welsh.

“Setting the stage with good boundaries, self-care, and strategies for promoting mental health during pregnancy can act as protective factors for maternal mental health. This is important because the number 1 complication of pregnancy, often untreated, is perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs),” notes Fields.

Dr. Welsh suggests that setting boundaries could mean simply offering kind but firm statements, like ‘We appreciate your concern, but we’re figuring out what works for us’ or ‘I’d rather not talk about my body or our plans right now.’

“It can also help to proactively share what you do welcome,” she adds. “For example, “We’re happy to talk about names once we’ve decided” or “Please check before posting photos of me.” Framing your needs positively and as part of taking good care of yourself and the baby, can help family hear it as loving rather than rejecting.”

If the set boundaries aren’t respected, Dr. Cetnar advises repeating them as needed without over-explaining. “Some people may not like it, but your comfort and mental health matter more than keeping everyone happy. If someone keeps pushing, consider limiting your time with them overall or asking someone else to help reinforce boundaries. If they persist, it may be helpful to share how the lack of respect is making you feel and request more space.”

Lastly, Dr. Welsh says that it’s important to keep in mind that motherhood, beginning with pregnancy, is deeply personal and unique and what may work for one may not work for another.

“A woman’s choices about her body, her family, and her work are hers alone. My advice to others: assume she’s doing her best at two really hard things: growing a baby and growing into motherhood. Let her take the lead on what kind of attention and support she wants.”

Commenters were appalled by MIL ruining such a special time for the parents

Reddit advice discussing a MIL causing drama at a gender reveal and trying to make it about herself.

Text conversation about a chaotic mother-in-law screaming at a gender reveal and causing family drama.

Advice on handling MIL screaming at gender reveal and making the event about herself in a tense post.

Text from a Reddit comment discussing a mother-in-law screaming at a gender reveal and making it about herself.

Text advice on handling MIL behavior at gender reveal, setting boundaries, and emphasizing family rules and counseling.

User comment on a forum discussing MIL screaming at a gender reveal and making it about herself.

Comment from ChristieFox advising on handling MIL's behavior at a gender reveal and enforcing relationship boundaries.

Comment detailing a MIL screaming at gender reveal and trying to make it about herself, discussing setting boundaries.

Comment advising to establish boundaries and address issues with MIL during gender reveal and pregnancy challenges.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing MIL behavior and issues related to a gender reveal event.

Comment advising firm boundaries with MIL after upsetting behavior at gender reveal, focusing on privacy and respect.

Comment addressing MIL's reaction at gender reveal, discussing family conflicts and baby boy custody concerns.

MIL yelling at a gender reveal party, making the event about herself in a tense family confrontation scene.

Screenshot of a social media comment expressing disappointment over a MIL’s meltdown at a gender reveal event.

Comment suggesting to have a squirt bottle ready next time MIL screams at gender reveal to stop her.

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Text advice on limiting contact with a difficult MIL causing drama at a gender reveal and postpartum visit concerns.

Comment warning to slap away mother-in-law who screams at gender reveal and invades personal space.

Commenter explains setting boundaries at a gender reveal, addressing intrusive touching of the pregnant belly.

Screenshot of a comment discussing MIL at a gender reveal, expressing frustration about her behavior and boundaries.

Comment advising to cut out toxic MIL trying to ruin gender reveal and emphasizing the need for spouse support and boundary setting.

Comment ranting about MIL screaming at a gender reveal and trying to make it about herself, emphasizing boundaries and respect.

Screenshot of a comment criticizing a MIL for screaming at a gender reveal and making it about herself.

Reddit user discussing dealing with a MIL tantrum during a pregnancy gender reveal event.

Comment warning about setting boundaries with a MIL at a gender reveal, emphasizing personal space and respect.

Comment about MIL escalating conflict over child care during a gender reveal event, highlighting family tension.

Comment advising to avoid allowing MIL to care for child due to disrespectful behavior during a gender reveal argument.

Screenshot of a comment discussing MIL drama and advice on managing tension during a gender reveal event.

User comment discussing dealing with a MIL's childish behavior at a gender reveal and pregnancy boundaries.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment advising on dealing with a difficult MIL at a gender reveal event.

Screenshot of a social media comment criticizing the gender reveal custom and discussing its perceived age and changes.

Comment advising to set boundaries with MIL at a gender reveal, emphasizing the importance of the expectant mother's feelings.

Comment on a thread about a MIL screaming at a gender reveal and trying to make it about herself.

Others also shared similar stories

Screenshot of a Reddit comment about a mother-in-law causing drama at a gender reveal event.

Comment discussing MIL behavior and respect issues at a gender reveal event focusing on in-laws and family dynamics.

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