Woman Considers Leaving Husband To Stay In A Hotel Room With His Mom While She Sleeps Separately

A lack of boundaries may manifest in two general ways: either you allow others to walk all over you, or you overstep other people’s personal space. The latter may be a sense of entitlement from someone who holds more authority, like a parent-in-law, something that tends to happen quite a lot. 

Today’s story is no different. A woman offered to pay for the hotel accommodations of her son and his wife, but there was a catch: she was tagging along and sleeping in the same room. 

The daughter-in-law had been dreading what would have been a relaxing holiday. Now, she plans to book her own room, but she wonders if her actions would be too distasteful. 

Some parents-in-law lack proper boundaries, and it creates unwanted family drama

Cherry blossoms illuminated at night along a tranquil canal during a scenic vacation.

Image credits: Sora Sagano / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

A woman was delighted after her mother-in-law offered to pay for hotel accommodations for her vacation

Text post discussion about getting a separate room on a vacation with husband.

Text about a honeymoon in Japan, expressing desire to return after a five-day visit.

Text discussing saving money for a 10-day visit next year.

Text discussing MIL paying for hotel on son's vacation, hinting at her joining and staying in their room.

Woman in a red shirt sitting in a wicker chair, looking concerned, talking to someone off-camera.

Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)

However, the good deed came with a catch

Text discussing MIL paying for hotel and joining son and DIL's vacation, causing introverted DIL discomfort.

Text message about mother-in-law's unexpected visit for six days.

Text discussing MIL paying for hotel on son's vacation, leading to discomfort.

Text conversation about MIL staying in the same hotel room during a vacation.

Confused couple sitting on a hotel bed, discussing vacation plans, expressing concerns about a MIL tagging along.

Image credits:  Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Stressed by the idea of bunking with her mother-in-law, the daughter now plans to get her own room

Text message showing conversation about vacation plans with mother-in-law.

Text image discussing boundaries in vacation room sharing with MIL.

Text about considering an extra room for comfort during vacation; mentioning cultural norms before marriage.

Text discussing feelings about MIL paying for hotel and sharing room on vacation.

Image credits:Interesting-Loss5861

Mothers-in-law always want to be in the picture out of fear of feeling left out

A thoughtful woman with wavy hair and earrings, represents a MIL in a vacation scenario.

Image credits:  cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Most of the family drama stories you’ve likely read on this site involve mothers-in-law, and there’s a reason for that. The friction often happens with their son’s wives, and according to California-based psychologist Dr. Amy Keller, PsyD, it’s primarily due to fear of abandonment. 

“She may have always been the leading lady in her son’s life. And now you have taken her place,” Dr. Keller said in an interview with Very Well Mind. 

Some moms-in-law tend to overstep boundaries, like showing up unannounced and expecting to be taken care of or invading personal space. While they may not intentionally want to intrude, their actions may damage the relationship. 

“This can lead to a power struggle if she is intentionally or subconsciously hoping to manipulate an outcome to her favor, such as when something does not go her way,” cognitive-behavioral psychologist and author Dr. Terri Bacow told Scary Mommy. 

Dr. Bacow adds that other examples of subtle boundary violations may include overstaying one’s welcome, such as choosing to remain in one’s home instead of a hotel. Or, as what happened in this story, staying in the same hotel room because she paid for it. 

Teletherapy psychologist Dr. Samantha Rodman Whiten, a.k.a Dr. PsychMom, attributes such behavior to possible disorders like narcissism or borderline personality. In an article for her website, she emphasized the importance of setting physical and/or emotional boundaries. 

Physical boundaries may include limiting visits, limiting communication to texts and emails, or giving a 24-hour notice before seeing each other. Emotional boundaries would involve refusing to tolerate underhanded insults or criticisms. 

The author did what she felt was right for her sake and sanity by booking her hotel room. However, she must communicate this with her mother-in-law by clearly explaining her intentions. The last thing she wants is to create a divide and put her husband in a difficult situation. 

Most readers didn’t think there would be anything wrong with going solo, with others offering suggestions

Reddit comment discussing MIL tagging along on couple's vacation.

Text exchange discussing MIL joining son's vacation, staying in their hotel room.

Comment addressing MIL vacation involvement, suggesting a new trip without her for the couple.

Forum comment discussing a vacation dilemma involving MIL joining a couple's trip.

Comment section discussing MIL sharing hotel room on vacation.

Comment about MIL joining son and DIL's vacation, emphasizing enjoying a trip and needing own room.

Comment on MIL deciding to book and stay in a room with son and DIL during vacation.

Reddit comment discussing MIL overstepping in son's vacation.

Reddit comment questioning MIL joining son and DIL's vacation room.

Forum comment about discomfort when staying with in-laws instead of a hotel.

Comment advising to book own room for privacy during vacation with MIL.

Online comment about MIL joining son and DIL's vacation in the same hotel room.

Comment about MIL joining son's vacation and room situation.

Text comment discussing MIL joining son's vacation and sharing their hotel room.

Text response to MIL tagging along on son's and DIL's vacation, expressing frustration.

Reddit comment discussing MIL tagging along on son and DIL's vacation.

Comment discussing MIL sharing a hotel room with son and daughter-in-law during vacation.

Comment text discussing MIL staying in hotel with son and daughter-in-law.

Text discussing MIL joining son's vacation and sharing room with DIL.

Reddit comment on MIL joining son and DIL's vacation, highlighting husband's lack of communication.

Text against MIL joining son and DIL's vacation, advising boundary discussion.

Comment discussing MIL tagging along on son's vacation, suggesting getting a separate hotel room.

Reddit comment discussing boundaries with MIL during vacation with son and DIL.

Comment expressing disapproval on MIL's vacation plans with son and DIL.

Text comment discussing MIL joining son and DIL’s vacation unexpectedly.

Reddit comment discussing vacation room issue with MIL, suggesting a separate room for mother-in-law.

Reddit comment about MIL joining vacation, affecting couple's privacy and plans.

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