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Husband Asks Wife To Give MIL Another Chance After She Tried “Breastfeeding” Their Baby
Older woman holding baby in living room, related to mother-in-law breastfeeding baby controversy story.
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Husband Asks Wife To Give MIL Another Chance After She Tried “Breastfeeding” Their Baby

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It’s always a blessing when family steps in to support you during and after childbirth. With those sleepless nights, endless feedings, and emotional ups and downs, you truly deserve a break. Having someone around can feel like a lifesaver. But sometimes, that well-meaning help can cross the line and blur boundaries.

One woman shared a shocking experience where her mother-in-law tried to breastfeed her baby without permission. When she confronted her, things quickly escalated into full-blown drama. Keep reading to find out what really happened.

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    Grandparents often cherish one-on-one time with their grandbabies and look forward to bonding moments

    Image credits: Image-Source / envato (not the actual photo)

    One woman shared why she decided not to let her mother-in-law babysit anymore after discovering she had tried to breastfeed the baby

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    Image credits: perfectlab / envato (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: milbfthrowaway

    New moms often struggle to get adequate rest, especially due to the demands of frequent breastfeeding

    Image credits: Sarah Chai / pexels (not the actual photo)

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    The transition to motherhood is a profound and delicate journey. While it’s often celebrated as a joyful milestone, it comes with its own set of challenges. From hormonal shifts to social adjustments, everhing changes overnight. These shifts can deeply affect a woman’s physical and emotional well-being. It’s not just about welcoming a baby, it’s about reinventing yourself. And for many, this transformation feels overwhelming and isolating.

    Postpartum depression is something many new mothers quietly battle. With sleepless nights, hormonal turbulence, and emotional fatigue, it’s no surprise that sadness seeps in. This isn’t just baby blues, it can feel like drowning in plain sight. Yet, many mothers hesitate to seek help, fearing judgment. What they need most is support, validation, and compassion. Silence only makes the experience harder than it already is.

    Sleep deprivation is one of the biggest struggles in early motherhood. Interrupted nights and constant alertness become a draining new normal. Without proper rest, even the smallest tasks feel like mountains. The exhaustion impacts mood, focus, and overall mental health. Mothers often push through quietly, but the toll is real.

    Feeding a newborn may seem natural, but it’s far from easy. Whether it’s was breastfeeding or bottle-feeding, the process can be both physically and emotionally demanding. New mothers often face pain, pressure, and plenty of unsolicited advice. The fear of not doing it “right” weighs heavily. Support from loved ones and professionals is essential during this phase. No mother should feel like she’s failing at something so basic.

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    Support from family and friends plays a crucial role in helping new parents navigate the challenges of early parenthood

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    Image credits: Exergen Corporation / pexels (not the actual photo)

    The emotional toll of early parenthood is intense and often invisible. Mothers may feel anger, resentment, or guilt but keep it bottled up. Studies show that parents often report more negative emotions than non-parents. Between expectations and exhaustion, joy sometimes takes a backseat. But acknowledging these struggles is the first step toward healing. No one should have to pretend that it’s all magical.

    In many cultural settings, caregiving falls disproportionately on mothers. Traditional gender roles still define who does what at home. This imbalance creates emotional strain and leaves little space for self-care. The mental burden grows heavier when there’s no shared responsibility. Mothers often feel they’re carrying everything while being expected to do it with grace. It’s an exhausting performance that needs rewriting.

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    When it comes to working mothers, they face an additional mental load that’s hard to put into words. Balancing job demands with childcare responsibilities is a daily tightrope. Around the world, many express ongoing anxiety and burnout. The expectation to be equally great at both roles is relentless. Often, there’s little time left to breathe, let alone rest.

    In this particular case, what initially felt like a blessing—having the mother-in-law help out—quickly turned into discomfort when the author felt she had crossed a line. While support is often welcomed and appreciated, boundaries still matter, especially in delicate situations like parenting. What are your thoughts on this? Was the author right to be upset, or was it all just a misunderstanding that was taken too far?

    Many were shocked and outraged by the mother-in-law’s behavior, calling it a clear violation of boundaries

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    Others felt the woman was overreacting and believed she made a big deal out of a misunderstood gesture

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    A few readers pointed out that both women shared some blame and the situation could have been handled better on both sides

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    Nikita Manot

    Nikita Manot

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Nikita's knack for storytelling and creativity has led her into the world of writing. With a robust foundation in business studies, she crafts compelling narratives by seamlessly blending analytical insight with imaginative expression. At Bored Panda, she embarks on an exhilarating quest to explore diverse topics, fueled by curiosity and passion. During her leisure time, she savors life's simple pleasures, such as gardening, cooking homemade meals and hosting gatherings for loved ones.

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    Nikita Manot

    Nikita Manot

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Nikita's knack for storytelling and creativity has led her into the world of writing. With a robust foundation in business studies, she crafts compelling narratives by seamlessly blending analytical insight with imaginative expression. At Bored Panda, she embarks on an exhilarating quest to explore diverse topics, fueled by curiosity and passion. During her leisure time, she savors life's simple pleasures, such as gardening, cooking homemade meals and hosting gatherings for loved ones.

    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

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    Gabija is a senior photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for movies and nature.

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    Gabija Palšytė

    Gabija Palšytė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Gabija is a senior photo editor at Bored Panda. Before joining the team, she achieved a Professional Bachelor degree in Photography and has been working as a freelance photographer since. She also has a special place in her heart for movies and nature.

    What do you think ?
    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WTF is up with the YTA who think it's ok for someone to shove their b00b into a crying baby that does not belong to them? Dummies and expressed milk were available.

    Tyke
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What I've (and my friends) done in the past is thoroughly wash hands, and stick your little finger in baby's mouth. No need to get your nips out. YTA's are unhinged again.

    Load More Replies...
    Earonn -
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If MIL had acted in good faith, she would have called OP and asked "Hey, baby can't sleep, would you mind if I...?" Personally, I can't see how anyone would come up with that idea, but I'm childfree.

    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I nursed my kid for around 16 months. That was almost 30 years ago. I have never ever even had the slightest inclination to offer my b**b to anyone else's baby. I just can't fathom. Gobsmacked. Bewildered.

    Load More Replies...
    Robin Roper
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people are crazy; this MIL is one.

    TruthoftheHeart
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If she thought the baby needed to suckle something she should have given it a pacifier!! Ugh

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP said baby won't take a pacifier, so they probably don't even have one handy.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you aren't lactating, then it's just "someone sucking your n****e".

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Hardly the world-shattering event the mother makes it.

    Load More Replies...
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The YTA here should never be allowed around children. This is bizarre and entirely unacceptable. Only someone with no judgment would do something this ridiculous. She can never be trusted alone around the child again. I'd call CPS myself and report her, just to make sure she understands that what she did was essentially illegal and sexual abuse of a child.

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Offering a breast to a baby is not sexual a*****t in any context. CPS is for children at risk. Don't waste their time with nonsense like this. And suggesting she cut off contact with grandparents over this? That's what will harm the child long term.

    Load More Replies...
    Tabitha
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially given the fact that MIL has called the child “my baby” in the past. Plus, OP mentioned that the baby has developed a liking for comfort suckling tells me MIL has made a habit of doing this a lot. Sounds very much like MIL wants her son’s baby to be her own. MIL is psychologically f****d up on so many levels.

    Load More Replies...
    VNES101
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have left work so d**n fast, burst through the door, put my baby down some place safe and smacked the shite out of my MIL. That is F&CKING DISGUSTING. She would never be allowed around my child again.

    Sarah Ellison
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Considering OP mentioned that her MIL also calls the baby "my baby", this feels very much like MIL is trying to recreate the feeling of having a baby. She was 100% playing make-believe and imaging she was the baby's mother.

    Sylvia Baker
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I nursed my boys and loved it... how would MIL feel if someone had done that to HER kids? The sexual implications are kind of out of line but there is no way I would have EVER done that to my grandchildren... that is mommy's role.

    Becky Samuel
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Americans are so convinced that their puritan ideas about the 'ickiness' of the natural human body are the only possible correct morals.

    Nadine Debard
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG. When me and my SIL were both nursing our babies and I watched my nephew, it would never had been an option to nurse him if he was crying. Never. I could have done if I were in a desperate situation (nothing to feed him and no option to avoid it) but never without SIL's permission. Never. And only in the sake of feeding, not soothing. Soft ESH for watching MIL without warning her beforehand, though.

    Liam Walsh
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With SILs permission you'd be acting as a wet nurse and better a baby fed in desperate circumstances. MIL couldn't do that and she absolutely had other options. Don't really agree about the soft ESH as MIL DID know that the baby monitor exists - she was trying to turn tables on the OP and spread the anger on to someone else as she knew she was in the wrong. If she wasn't, why would she mind being seen? No warning necessary when it's her house and her baby and the camera wasn't hidden.

    Load More Replies...
    Eliza
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All the ytas can get f****d.

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TIL that putting a n****e in a baby's mouth is sexual a*****t to some people. Reminds me of the men who won't let their sons breastfeed because it's too sexual. Crazy and more crazy.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wtf are those troll YTA,s on 🤦‍♀️🤬inhuman totally , as is mil delusional, n it is as other say abuse to although I gotta say going back to work after 5 weeks is awful, dont see the point in having kids if your gonna palm em off on a bloody nanny or the likes ffs , if you can afford a any full time , you can comfortably afford to stay at home for a year ! No way anyone was looking after my kids , I had at 35-39 I worked in the evenings when my then husband was home from work , but then that’s us in uk , that said what mil did IS NOT OK !!

    Sara Shamsabadi
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I honestly have a strong aversion to hearing babies cry hard, it makes me feel very tense to say the least. It was very strange of her to do this, but given her history with her own babies, and maybe she was stressed out in that moment, I think instead of going nuclear 'you'll never see your grandchild again' reaction, they needed to express it was not ok & to never do that again. This 'immediately go nc' train is ridiculous. She's watching your baby for free & I'm assuming you felt confident she loves & cares for the baby well. Taking care of a newborn is hard, don't deny family & react out of stress.

    Xenia Harley
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I know from my own experience that my breastfed newborn would NOT take a bottle, at all! My boss actually babysat him a number of times, at her request, because she loved babies. (Her 8 and 10 year old daughters were around, too, so not weird!) She was very experienced and there would be times where he cried but would not take a bottle of expressed milk. He only wanted my b**b. While this is unusual, I get the feeling of not being to help the baby. I think the MIL took a drastic approach, but... It's not always as "easy" as popping a bottle in the baby's mouth for a breastfed baby!

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This baby is fed breast milk via a bottle at other times as well as breast fed by mom. It's just an excuse. Even if the baby wouldn't settle for once, that's actually okay. Stressful, but survivable by all parties! MIL did NOT need to stick her breast in that baby's mouth.

    Load More Replies...
    Debbie
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    So I have an unpopular opinion it seems, I'm going with ESH / No one TA. It would have been nice to inform/ask mom about it before hand, but I can also get it that in the "panic/focus" on the baby that is not on your mind when you are trying to calm him/her. To forbid her from babysitting is a knee jerk reaction. Calm down. A new mom is very protective of her child so her reaction is understandable. It was an AH reaction and should be toned down after calming down. Talk it out. So why do I think that MIL was not TA? First: A b**b is not sexual. Second: MIL was not trying to breastfeed, she was trying to calm the baby which was missing bodily warmth / a b**b/ a n****e. If a pacifier or pink doesn't work, and you're desperate, and a n****e helps... (No, A pacifier or pink don't always work.) MIL can't breastfeed so would nog be giving milk. She didn't do it for her own pleasure, she did it to comfort the baby. Would you rather have your baby cry the entire afternoon or be comforted?

    Moira
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She has literally nurse four kids, she should know how to keep calm under that situation. That was gross, cringe and out of context. If she can't stand a child crying without panicking after nursing four of her own kids, she is not in a mental state to nurse her grandchild.

    Load More Replies...
    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WTF is up with the YTA who think it's ok for someone to shove their b00b into a crying baby that does not belong to them? Dummies and expressed milk were available.

    Tyke
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What I've (and my friends) done in the past is thoroughly wash hands, and stick your little finger in baby's mouth. No need to get your nips out. YTA's are unhinged again.

    Load More Replies...
    Earonn -
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If MIL had acted in good faith, she would have called OP and asked "Hey, baby can't sleep, would you mind if I...?" Personally, I can't see how anyone would come up with that idea, but I'm childfree.

    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I nursed my kid for around 16 months. That was almost 30 years ago. I have never ever even had the slightest inclination to offer my b**b to anyone else's baby. I just can't fathom. Gobsmacked. Bewildered.

    Load More Replies...
    Robin Roper
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people are crazy; this MIL is one.

    TruthoftheHeart
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If she thought the baby needed to suckle something she should have given it a pacifier!! Ugh

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP said baby won't take a pacifier, so they probably don't even have one handy.

    Load More Replies...
    Sunny Day
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you aren't lactating, then it's just "someone sucking your n****e".

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Hardly the world-shattering event the mother makes it.

    Load More Replies...
    Kate Johnson
    Community Member
    Premium
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The YTA here should never be allowed around children. This is bizarre and entirely unacceptable. Only someone with no judgment would do something this ridiculous. She can never be trusted alone around the child again. I'd call CPS myself and report her, just to make sure she understands that what she did was essentially illegal and sexual abuse of a child.

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Offering a breast to a baby is not sexual a*****t in any context. CPS is for children at risk. Don't waste their time with nonsense like this. And suggesting she cut off contact with grandparents over this? That's what will harm the child long term.

    Load More Replies...
    Tabitha
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially given the fact that MIL has called the child “my baby” in the past. Plus, OP mentioned that the baby has developed a liking for comfort suckling tells me MIL has made a habit of doing this a lot. Sounds very much like MIL wants her son’s baby to be her own. MIL is psychologically f****d up on so many levels.

    Load More Replies...
    VNES101
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have left work so d**n fast, burst through the door, put my baby down some place safe and smacked the shite out of my MIL. That is F&CKING DISGUSTING. She would never be allowed around my child again.

    Sarah Ellison
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Considering OP mentioned that her MIL also calls the baby "my baby", this feels very much like MIL is trying to recreate the feeling of having a baby. She was 100% playing make-believe and imaging she was the baby's mother.

    Sylvia Baker
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I nursed my boys and loved it... how would MIL feel if someone had done that to HER kids? The sexual implications are kind of out of line but there is no way I would have EVER done that to my grandchildren... that is mommy's role.

    Becky Samuel
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Americans are so convinced that their puritan ideas about the 'ickiness' of the natural human body are the only possible correct morals.

    Nadine Debard
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG. When me and my SIL were both nursing our babies and I watched my nephew, it would never had been an option to nurse him if he was crying. Never. I could have done if I were in a desperate situation (nothing to feed him and no option to avoid it) but never without SIL's permission. Never. And only in the sake of feeding, not soothing. Soft ESH for watching MIL without warning her beforehand, though.

    Liam Walsh
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With SILs permission you'd be acting as a wet nurse and better a baby fed in desperate circumstances. MIL couldn't do that and she absolutely had other options. Don't really agree about the soft ESH as MIL DID know that the baby monitor exists - she was trying to turn tables on the OP and spread the anger on to someone else as she knew she was in the wrong. If she wasn't, why would she mind being seen? No warning necessary when it's her house and her baby and the camera wasn't hidden.

    Load More Replies...
    Eliza
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All the ytas can get f****d.

    roddy
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TIL that putting a n****e in a baby's mouth is sexual a*****t to some people. Reminds me of the men who won't let their sons breastfeed because it's too sexual. Crazy and more crazy.

    Crystalwitch60
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wtf are those troll YTA,s on 🤦‍♀️🤬inhuman totally , as is mil delusional, n it is as other say abuse to although I gotta say going back to work after 5 weeks is awful, dont see the point in having kids if your gonna palm em off on a bloody nanny or the likes ffs , if you can afford a any full time , you can comfortably afford to stay at home for a year ! No way anyone was looking after my kids , I had at 35-39 I worked in the evenings when my then husband was home from work , but then that’s us in uk , that said what mil did IS NOT OK !!

    Sara Shamsabadi
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I honestly have a strong aversion to hearing babies cry hard, it makes me feel very tense to say the least. It was very strange of her to do this, but given her history with her own babies, and maybe she was stressed out in that moment, I think instead of going nuclear 'you'll never see your grandchild again' reaction, they needed to express it was not ok & to never do that again. This 'immediately go nc' train is ridiculous. She's watching your baby for free & I'm assuming you felt confident she loves & cares for the baby well. Taking care of a newborn is hard, don't deny family & react out of stress.

    Xenia Harley
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I know from my own experience that my breastfed newborn would NOT take a bottle, at all! My boss actually babysat him a number of times, at her request, because she loved babies. (Her 8 and 10 year old daughters were around, too, so not weird!) She was very experienced and there would be times where he cried but would not take a bottle of expressed milk. He only wanted my b**b. While this is unusual, I get the feeling of not being to help the baby. I think the MIL took a drastic approach, but... It's not always as "easy" as popping a bottle in the baby's mouth for a breastfed baby!

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This baby is fed breast milk via a bottle at other times as well as breast fed by mom. It's just an excuse. Even if the baby wouldn't settle for once, that's actually okay. Stressful, but survivable by all parties! MIL did NOT need to stick her breast in that baby's mouth.

    Load More Replies...
    Debbie
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    So I have an unpopular opinion it seems, I'm going with ESH / No one TA. It would have been nice to inform/ask mom about it before hand, but I can also get it that in the "panic/focus" on the baby that is not on your mind when you are trying to calm him/her. To forbid her from babysitting is a knee jerk reaction. Calm down. A new mom is very protective of her child so her reaction is understandable. It was an AH reaction and should be toned down after calming down. Talk it out. So why do I think that MIL was not TA? First: A b**b is not sexual. Second: MIL was not trying to breastfeed, she was trying to calm the baby which was missing bodily warmth / a b**b/ a n****e. If a pacifier or pink doesn't work, and you're desperate, and a n****e helps... (No, A pacifier or pink don't always work.) MIL can't breastfeed so would nog be giving milk. She didn't do it for her own pleasure, she did it to comfort the baby. Would you rather have your baby cry the entire afternoon or be comforted?

    Moira
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She has literally nurse four kids, she should know how to keep calm under that situation. That was gross, cringe and out of context. If she can't stand a child crying without panicking after nursing four of her own kids, she is not in a mental state to nurse her grandchild.

    Load More Replies...
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