Man Tells GF They Can’t Live Together After She Shares Her Idea Of Splitting Living Costs

Moving in with your partner is a big step, one that should be carefully considered, especially when it comes to splitting shared expenses. We know that a few things sour romance more than money talk, but it has to happen in order to avoid bigger disagreements down the road. 

This couple tried doing that before moving in together, but faced some challenges along the way. Since their incomes differed quite a lot, the girlfriend suggested splitting the costs based on their salaries, but this didn’t seem like a good option to the boyfriend, who, upon such an agreement, would have to pay more. 

Talking about money before moving in with your partner is essential

Couple surrounded by moving boxes, discussing living arrangements and sharing 50/50 financial split in modern living room.

Image credits: Yunus Tuğ / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

During one of such talks, this couple couldn’t agree on how to equally split their shared expenses

Text excerpt showing a boyfriend refusing to let his girlfriend move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Couple discussing finances with boyfriend refusing to let woman move in unless expenses are split 50/50.

Text on screen describes a woman wanting to move in with her boyfriend as rent rises, but he refuses without splitting 50/50.

Couple having serious conversation at the table, woman looks upset while discussing moving in and splitting 50/50 expenses.

Image credits: Gabriel Ponton / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Text about a woman and furious boyfriend discussing living arrangements and splitting expenses 50/50.

Text showing a boyfriend explaining his refusal to let his girlfriend move in unless they split bills 50/50.

Young man looking stressed and frustrated, covering his face with his hand in a moment of relationship conflict.

Image credits: Jordan González / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Text discussing living expenses and a 50/50 split, highlighting concerns about paying more with shared costs despite lower stipend.

Text about woman and boyfriend arguing over refusing to move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Image credits: Puzzleheaded_Feed460

The guy later clarified some things:

Text excerpt showing a woman and boyfriend’s fight over money and splitting expenses 50/50 before moving in together.

Text excerpt discussing a woman whose boyfriend refuses to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Text excerpt discussing a woman and furious boyfriend refusing to let her move in without splitting expenses 50/50.

Text excerpt discussing a boyfriend refusing proportional expenses as part of a 50/50 split with his furious girlfriend.

Woman furious using calculator, reviewing finances and documents, illustrating boyfriend refusing move-in without splitting 50/50 costs.

Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

If partners want their contributions to the household to be truly equal, splitting expenses 50/50 isn’t always fair

The most straightforward way couples living together can split their shared expenses like rent, utilities, and food is to go the 50/50 route. Seems fair, right? Well, if partners want their contributions to the household to be truly equal, splitting them in half doesn’t always result in an even share. 

It rarely happens that both partners’ incomes are the same, so if a couple agrees to do the 50/50 split, one person may be putting their entire paycheck towards shared bills, while the other will have a lot of extra money remaining. This might result in debt for the person who contributes all their money to the household, while the other saves.

Therefore, the most equitable and fair way to split expenses is by dividing them based on income. That is, if a couple prefers to share costs equally, because what works for one couple may not work for the other. To split costs based on income, the couple will have to use some math, but it shouldn’t be that complicated.

Essentially, how this works, according to Ellevest, a women’s wealth and financial guide, is that partners should keep their individual bank accounts and open a joint checking account, which will be used to pay the shared bills. Then comes the math, which is better explained by experts at Ellevest themselves:

“Add up your total household income. Then calculate the percentage of that total each individual partner/spouse makes. Now add up your total monthly shared expenses (rent/mortgage, utilities, groceries, joint investing or saving goals, etc). Then multiply that total by each of those two percentages from step one to calculate how much each of you should contribute.” 

A visual representation and example of this can be found in this image. After the calculations, both parties transfer their share into the joint account every month, and whatever is left, they can spend however they like.

Couple holding hands at a table with coffee cups, illustrating a tense moment in a relationship about splitting 50/50.

Image credits: Priscilla Du Preez / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

What matters most is agreeing to split the expenses in a way that works for both partners

Of course, this might not work for every couple out there. What matters most is agreeing to split the expenses in a way that both partners feel comfortable with. 

“No matter how you choose to break it up, the most important thing is that you’re both on the same page about your finances—how much is coming in, how much is going out, and what long-term financial goals you want to hit together. Then make a plan to get there that works for you,” agree experts at Ellevest. 

Time and time again, money proves to be a leading cause of breakups and divorce, so having that dreaded money talk and putting a financial plan that satisfies both parties could prevent tensions and disagreements caused by money. 

The guy provided more information in the comments

Online conversation showing a woman furious as boyfriend insists on splitting expenses 50/50 before moving in together.

Comment exchange about earnings and fairness in a relationship, discussing 50/50 split and proportional contributions.

Text exchange discussing a furious boyfriend refusing to let woman move in unless expenses are split 50/50.

Some commenters thought the guy was right to suggest a 50/50 split

Screenshot of a forum post discussing a woman furious at her boyfriend refusing to split living costs 50/50.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing relationship boundaries and fairness in splitting housing costs equally.

Text post discussing a furious boyfriend refusing to let woman move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Comment emphasizing a boyfriend refusing to let his furious girlfriend move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Screenshot of an online comment discussing a furious boyfriend refusing to let his woman move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Comment discussing financial stress and responsibility in a relationship where boyfriend refuses to let woman move in without splitting 50/50.

Comment discussing a furious boyfriend refusing to let woman move in unless expenses are split 50/50 for fairness.

While others—not so much

Furious woman confronting boyfriend refusing to let her move in without splitting expenses 50/50 during argument.

Screenshot of a Reddit post discussing a boyfriend refusing to let his girlfriend move in without splitting expenses 50/50.

Text comment about a furious boyfriend refusing to let his woman move in without splitting expenses equally.

Reddit comment discussing a furious boyfriend refusing to let his girlfriend move in without splitting costs 50/50.

Comment discussing a boyfriend refusing to let his furious girlfriend move in unless they share expenses 50/50.

Text post discussing a woman furious boyfriend refusing to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Comment discussing a woman furious with her boyfriend who refuses to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Commenter discussing fairness of splitting bills based on income, relating to woman furious boyfriend refusing 50/50 move-in.

Furious woman confronts boyfriend refusing to let her move in without a 50/50 financial split agreement.

Comment discussing relationship finances and proportional income as a standard, addressing furious boyfriend and 50/50 split issue.

Screenshot of a forum post discussing a woman furious as her boyfriend refuses to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Text post humorously discussing a furious boyfriend insisting on splitting utilities 50/50 before letting his girlfriend move in.

Text post showing a discussion about a furious boyfriend refusing to let his girlfriend move in without splitting expenses 50/50.

Furious woman arguing with boyfriend who refuses to let her move in without splitting expenses 50/50.

Screenshot of a comment criticizing a boyfriend who refuses to let his furious girlfriend move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Some even believed that the couple isn’t compatible to have a future together

Comment discussing the importance of being aligned in financial goals when building a life with a partner.

Comment stating financial incompatibility as reason for relationship issues, related to boyfriend refusing moving in without splitting 50/50.

Text comment on a white background stating a sarcastic remark about someone not liking a woman as much as they think.

Comment discussing a woman furious as her boyfriend refuses to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50

Screenshot of a discussion about a woman furious that her boyfriend refuses to let her move in unless they split expenses 50/50.

Comment discussing financial disagreements and proportional split in a relationship for shared living expenses.

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