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Parents Invite Couple To Vacation Just To Use Them For Free Babysitting: “My Wife And I Left”
Tired parents can go to great lengths just to catch a moment of rest, quiet, and peace.
At least, it seems like it from this story, where the parents of three invited a couple to go on vacation with them just so they could get some free babysitting. After the couple saw through their scheme, they decided to leave, which caused quite a reaction from them.
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It seems that tired parents can go to great lengths to get some rest
Image credits: master1305 (not the actual photo)
These parents even tricked a couple into going with them on vacation so they could babysit for free
Image credits: Jonathan Borba (not the actual photo)
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Wooden-Intern-6316
Image credits: awesomecontent (not the actual photo)
“It is not appropriate for parents to assume that their child-free family members will step in as babysitters during a vacation”
Everyone knows that raising kids is hard work, and most of the time, childcare is very expensive. So parents who want to catch some rest without breaking the bank might resort to their family for babysitting favors. However, they often make a mistake in assuming or expecting that their loved ones will be willing to take care of their kids with open arms, especially on vacation.
“It is not appropriate for parents to assume that their child-free family members will step in as babysitters during a vacation,” certified parenting coach Zohaib Sunesara said in a previous interview with Bored Panda. “Family members are not automatic caregivers, and their presence on a trip should be respected as their personal time to relax and recharge.”
If parents ignore this fact, it can really complicate or even damage their relationship with their family members. “Assuming someone is willing to help, especially with something as important as caring for children, can lead to misunderstandings or even resentment. Instead, it’s always better to ask directly and kindly. And when someone does offer to help, expressing genuine gratitude goes a long way in strengthening those relationships,” licensed marriage and family therapist Catherine O’Brien previously told Bored Panda.
Experts explain that parents usually expect others to babysit their kids because they think others are less busy, forget that not everyone enjoys spending time with kids, or have seen the same family patterns happening in the past.
“In many cases, it’s a matter of family patterns—maybe caregiving was just something that always happened in the past. There’s often a sense of unspoken expectation rooted in love, but also in stress. Parenting is overwhelming, and sometimes parents hope support will naturally come from within the family. Still, assuming help is available without checking in can create tension and erode trust over time,” O’Brien noted.
“It’s perfectly okay to say no, or to say yes with limits”
So to avoid tension, resentment, or even disputes because of babysitting expectations, it’s a good idea to set healthy boundaries. This might be tricky at first, but everyone involved will be glad they are there when their relationship improves because of them.
One way to set a boundary is to say ‘no.’ However, in order to prevent conflict, it has to be said with kindness and clarity, says Sunesara. “Most conflicts arise not from the decline itself but from how the message is delivered,” he noted.
“Healthy boundaries are all about being clear and kind,” agrees O’Brien. “That means sharing what you’re comfortable with—how often you’re able to help, what kind of notice you need, and what your energy allows. It’s perfectly okay to say no, or to say yes with limits. The key is to communicate those boundaries early and respectfully. Strong families thrive on mutual respect—not obligation—and when everyone’s needs are acknowledged, relationships tend to thrive.”
Parents who want to relax on their vacation without burdening their loved ones should think about having a childcare plan in advance. They have many options, like looking for childcare services where they’re staying or taking turns with each other. “Parents can have a fulfilling vacation with kids without relying on child-free family members by being proactive and resourceful,” Sunesara concludes.
Readers were calling the parents delusional
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What do you think ?
Paul C 6 months ago
Their children, their problem. If help given is not being appreciated, but expected, then don't be surprised when it stops.
Zoe Vokes 6 months ago
I’m fine with “can you look after them one evening for a date night,” but not frequently, not without asking and not without being grateful.
Load More Replies...
Babs McGurk 6 months ago (edited)
Too many of these posts with the same basic theme - "Someone else watch my children!" If you spawned them, take care of them yourself and don't try to palm them off on other people!
Emilu 6 months ago
OP and OP’s partner need to pull back (even if said partner enjoys babysitting) because they’re obviously being used. Dàmn rich of the SIL and partner to just assume that they have a free sitter (or sitters) along for the ride. I’d personally just spend the rest of the time pissed so I can’t look after the kids, but I’m petty like that.
JayWantsACat 6 months ago
And people like this ALWAYS use their kids to emotionally blackmail others. "Don't you want to be with the kids?" "The kids will miss you!" F**k off.
Mary Allan 6 months ago
I don't like kids and know they are a lot of work. Knowing the s, I chose not to have any. You chose to have some. What makes parents think I want anything to do with looking after there's. If I wanted to look after kids I'd have had some. If you don't want to look after kids, don't have them and don't expect child free friends and relatives to want to look after them.
D Gibson 6 months ago
I had a friend like this (no more.) She would ask to have a morning of babysitting so she could play golf, which I was happy to do. 8 hours later she arrived home after golfing. She also stopped for a game of squash on the way home. The final straw was when she had planned a run with another friend & a late lunch ,all without checking in to be sure it was okay. I put an end to that. She became completely untrustworthy to me. I became the 'bad guy' , which was perfectly fine with me. I knew her other friends would be used by her also.
Steve Kadner 6 months ago
I think the phrase "it takes two to be a doormat" is very applicable here. OP's wife seems to be enabling the behavior by taking the brother's children without any limitations on how often. There may well be a deeper issue in that the OP and the OP's wife are unable to or have decided not to have children and she is overcompensating with her nieces and nephews and being taken advantage of.
Susan Gourlay 6 months ago
NTA. Their monkeys, their circus! Welcome to parenthood. There are no days off or vacation days until you die!
Paul C 6 months ago
Their children, their problem. If help given is not being appreciated, but expected, then don't be surprised when it stops.
Zoe Vokes 6 months ago
I’m fine with “can you look after them one evening for a date night,” but not frequently, not without asking and not without being grateful.
Load More Replies... Babs McGurk 6 months ago (edited)
Too many of these posts with the same basic theme - "Someone else watch my children!" If you spawned them, take care of them yourself and don't try to palm them off on other people!
Emilu 6 months ago
OP and OP’s partner need to pull back (even if said partner enjoys babysitting) because they’re obviously being used. Dàmn rich of the SIL and partner to just assume that they have a free sitter (or sitters) along for the ride. I’d personally just spend the rest of the time pissed so I can’t look after the kids, but I’m petty like that.
JayWantsACat 6 months ago
And people like this ALWAYS use their kids to emotionally blackmail others. "Don't you want to be with the kids?" "The kids will miss you!" F**k off.
Mary Allan 6 months ago
I don't like kids and know they are a lot of work. Knowing the s, I chose not to have any. You chose to have some. What makes parents think I want anything to do with looking after there's. If I wanted to look after kids I'd have had some. If you don't want to look after kids, don't have them and don't expect child free friends and relatives to want to look after them.
D Gibson 6 months ago
I had a friend like this (no more.) She would ask to have a morning of babysitting so she could play golf, which I was happy to do. 8 hours later she arrived home after golfing. She also stopped for a game of squash on the way home. The final straw was when she had planned a run with another friend & a late lunch ,all without checking in to be sure it was okay. I put an end to that. She became completely untrustworthy to me. I became the 'bad guy' , which was perfectly fine with me. I knew her other friends would be used by her also.
Steve Kadner 6 months ago
I think the phrase "it takes two to be a doormat" is very applicable here. OP's wife seems to be enabling the behavior by taking the brother's children without any limitations on how often. There may well be a deeper issue in that the OP and the OP's wife are unable to or have decided not to have children and she is overcompensating with her nieces and nephews and being taken advantage of.
Susan Gourlay 6 months ago
NTA. Their monkeys, their circus! Welcome to parenthood. There are no days off or vacation days until you die!
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