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Bezos’ Space Launch Turned Into A Massive Joke Online, Here Are 40 Of The Best Jokes And Memes
Amazon founder and billionaire Jeff Bezos successfully rocketed up more than 65 miles on Tuesday, and declared that the event had made for his "Best day ever."
Bezos, his brother Mark, aeronautics legend Wally Funk and 18-year-old Oliver Daemen flew on a New Shepard rocket, landing safely in the West Texas desert after a trip of more than eight minutes.
It's just my guess, but I think Bezos may have been blasting Bo Burnham during the flight: "Come on, Jeffrey, you can do it / Pave the way, put your back into it / Tell us why, show us how / Look at where you came from, look at you now."
True, Bezos didn't actually "pave the way": he was the second billionaire businessman to head to space, with Virgin Galactic's Richard Branson beating him by 9 days, but his trip has inspired just as many memes and jokes. Here are some of the funniest ones
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#1
patrick springer 4 years ago
Disgusting amount of greed. He stomped on so many people to create his wealth.
Carmen Sandiego 4 years ago
Yes. Gimme libraries. And also open hospitals and education centres.
Otter 4 years ago
Or the Williamsburg Historic Village, or the Monterey Bay aquarium. A Hewlett Packard founder funded the Monterey Aquarium, which revitalized tge Monterey economy, educated the public, funded marine research, gave the public some fun, and gave Mr. Packard a chance to bum rides on deep-sea research vessels. Nobody makes memes mocking Packard!
Eglė Bukauskaitė 3 years ago
or.. take an artist of some kind as a house pet (looking at you Venice)
RELATED:
#2
The post-flight briefing was shown a video of the occupants performing somersaults and tumbles during four minutes of weightlessness.
Stunning views of the Earth could be seen outside — the crew travelled in a capsule with the biggest windows flown in space, offering stunning views of the Earth.
Jeff Bezos was surprised by the sensation of microgravity: "It felt so normal," he said.
Funk added: "It was great, I loved it, I can hardly wait to go again." In the 1960s, she was one member of a group of women called the Mercury 13. They underwent the same screening tests as male astronauts, but never got to fly under the US national space program.
#3
mph seti 4 years ago
The more you have, the less you pay for. Taxes, meals, room and board, event tickets...Almost everything is comped for the rich and famous.
BetterBitterButter 4 years ago
Paying taxes will give them an adrenaline rush that they never felt before.
Doris Bennett 4 years ago
The more you donate to worthy causes ... the less you pay in taxes ... DUH!
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
Can a man be called a man because he flies high or because he knows how to treat other human beings?
Tobin Kern 4 years ago
I wish people understood taxes. Bezos pays personal income tax. Amazon pays state income taxes as well as state unemployment. Amazon pays Federal taxes such as payroll, SS, FICO, unemployment. The only tax they don't pay is federal income because a tax law that has been around since the Clinton admin allows a company to reallocate the funds that would have normally gone to the Feds to go to R&D, Charity, or employee benefits.
Heather Pezanetti 4 years ago
Thank Christ! Finally, there is another soul who understands this!!!
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#4
BetweenTheCracks 4 years ago
This very post is a perfect sign of how twisted this world is. Bezos can do all the malignant things listed in this article with impunity, but ohhh dear lawd, do NOT let teh ebil "D" and "F" words be seen!!1!!! Priorities, society. Fvcking PRIORITIES.
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
I think Jeffy BOY.(I'm sorry I can't call you a man or is it I won't)? The way you plan things so well I'm even sure you made the bathrooms and lunch areas so far away from the work stations a deliberate act.
Vermillion Ace #443 4 years ago
Could've been a middle finger to Earth and his employee base as well...
#5
Henry Cheves 4 years ago (edited)
The only reason God didn't strike it down was Wally Funk. Google her. She was on the rocket.
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Hineao Wharehineao 4 years ago
He must be a D**K of a boss.Please don't send him toAOTEAROA(NEW ZEALND) His plane will get EGGED.
Alexandra Nara 4 years ago
Everybody: " count me in - I'm just ordering an express unioniser on Amazon "
Eventually, Bezos also revealed what the astronauts spoke about as they were in the capsule ahead of the launch; he told his crewmates that the flight was not just about "adventure" but also the start of "something big."
"What we're doing is the first step of something big, and I know what that feels like, I did it three decades ago, nearly three decades ago, with Amazon," Bezos said. "Big things start small, but you can tell when you're onto something, and this is important."
"We're going to build a road to space so that our kids and their kids can build the future, and we need to do that, we need to do that to solve the problems here on Earth,” Bezos added. “This is not about escaping Earth."
#6
Angela B 4 years ago
Best and most appropriate comment I have seen thus far 🏆
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SlartyBlartFast 4 years ago
Normal midlife crisis: small red car, big boobs; "self-made" (yeah, riiiight) billionaire midlife crisis: gets the penis enlargement the world will LOL to death to..
#7
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 4 years ago
Have no line for women toilet? That's something I never saw.
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
How far is that toilet away from your work area guys? About 5 min is my guess!
Valley Girl 4 years ago
We got eight minutes! Everyone hurry up and go to the bathroom, bring all your used containers for emptying too
#8
Robert T 4 years ago
"I see that Jeff Bezos has made it into space astride his giant phallic rocket. The massive bell-end made it safely back to Earth by parachute, along with the rest of the capsule. Just waiting for the Austin Powers inspired memes now. 😉" It didn't take long, and I'm not disappointed. :D
CatWoman312 4 years ago
Someone actually stiched a video with his rocket and the Austin powers movie. It was hilarious and I recommend others watch it
The billionaire said Earth is "the only good planet" in our solar system, and "we've sent robotic probes to all of them."
"When you go to space and see how fragile it is, you want to take care of it even more, and that's what this is about," he explained.
Bezos estimated that Blue Origin has already approached some $100 million in private ticket sales.
While building space infrastructure will take decades, Bezos believes that "This is how it starts."
The memers, however, seem to disagree.
#9
M O'Connell 4 years ago
It is. The physical requirements of the mission dictated that particular shape, which is unfortunate.
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Gail Ludwig 4 years ago
The Amazon logo looks like a dildo. Practically every move of his is dickish.
#10
Sharon Vaughn 4 years ago
He was only in space 10 minutes. I think he went before he left home.
#11
denzoren 4 years ago
Normally I'd say nah people are just stretching to make it seem phallic...not this time. That's a giant d**k. No question about it. That had to be planned right?
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Are you talking about the rocket or its occupant? Or both?
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Lav Oravaf 4 years ago (edited)
looks exactly like the one I have in my nightstand drawer, that I bought on Amazon..
Hannah Edwards 4 years ago
Yep, Jeff you’ve made yourself a giant space penis, no doubt about it.
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
I'm gonna get a minus for this but here goes. I guess it's only metal that makes it stiff!
stacyh 4 years ago
Are you dating Bezos already or just desperate to suck his d**k?
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Hans 4 years ago
"Evade taxes" or "Support lobbying for loose international taxation" would be reasonable entries on that TODO list.
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 4 years ago
May be I'm STUPID but why did this SOB pollute our space some more - because he could maybe!
HardTruths 4 years ago
How about 'Collect taxes'? Sounds like something he may aspire to after 'conquering' space. 😏
Michael Naretto 4 years ago
Jeff Bezos paid hundreds of millions of dollars in taxes. This is easy to verify. The mythical "zero" taxes is a combination of being taxed on income and other assets and writing off losses in other areas such as investments. Anyway, I am sure the man would gladly trade tax burdens with you...
#13
Sky Render 4 years ago
I wonder if this will cause insecure men everywhere to strap enormous phalluses to their absurdly lifted trucks, badly tuned motorcycles and excessively loud sports cars?
TheBoredPanda 4 years ago
Can't be much worse than those idiotic metal nutsacks they have hanging from their hitches.
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Brian Bennett 4 years ago
I'm old but would it be possible he did this because he has a "LIMP BISCUIT" in reality?
Axolotl King 4 years ago
I just got the compensation joke after reading like 5 tweets on this list with it. Oof
#14
Jane Alexander 4 years ago
Shoulda kept him there for 16 hours and having to pee really badly the whole time!
#15
Legen ( wait for it ) dary 4 years ago
Not me. I prefer read the memes. It's much more interesting.
#16
CatWoman312 4 years ago
The fact he had the audacity to thank us confirms he’s a narcissistic sociopath. Does he actually think that’s how we wanted him to spend his money? Is he really that out of touch?
Vermillion Ace #443 4 years ago
Is he done with his venture already? If so, pay your damn workers! 😐
Jacqueline Yale 4 years ago
geeze, all that rocket fuel must not contribute to pollution? OIC Your rich so your allowed to leave your mark on the ozone
#17
YoyoSthlm 4 years ago
Why are people downvoting this? It's true and it's funny
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 4 years ago
These are supposed to be intelligent BOYS , can't they see the whole world is laughing at them down here?
Vermillion Ace #443 4 years ago
😮 True, they didn't quite reach where the ISS is. Pretty sure they were laughing at them in their futile efforts to race each other.
#18
Tanya MacLeod 4 years ago
This God account is the best to follow on Twitter and FB.
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Bee / she/her 4 years ago
When your employees are not being paid enough to live while working for almost all of their day
#19
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Bezos himself is a giant dildo. Same with the whole rotten bunch of them. I am sick to death of these billionaire douchebags wasting money on their heinously expensive pissing contests—-during a f*****g pandemic when people are out of work and getting evicted—-instead of spending it in ways that would benefit those in genuine need. How f*****g dare they show off like this in front of people whose PUA benefits are being cut by their states, and who have had to move in with relatives (so essentially homeless) because they lost their jobs and ended up being evicted. This is the opportunity to practice a little of that “trickle down economics” they’ve greatly benefitted from. But no, they’d rather rub our noses in it. F**k them all. This should be considered the cherry on top of the icing on the cake in the movement against wealth disparity. History says, once the masses have reached the limit of what they will accept from the wealthy, it will not end well for rich douches like these guys—-do I hear the sound of tumbrils rolling yet?
RadiatorAnkleSpider 4 years ago
It looks like parts of it are duct taped together… and yes it looks like a giant d**ck.
#20
Nikki Sevven 4 years ago
Right? We all know what it says. And if you can't define "dildo," you can't possibly be offended.
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patrick springer 4 years ago
Its not a dildo! its a vibrating toothbrush with a foot long rubber handle.
A B C 4 years ago
Oh no, prices would go up by, what? $0.10 per item to make it possible for the employees to lead a somewhat decent life and maybe get f*cking TOILET BREAKS? We can't have that, Neil has to save his hard-earned money.
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#22
A.E. Marlowe 4 years ago
A urine joke. P^2 aka P x P which is PP... Pee pee which is term for urine. Not a great joke
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 4 years ago
Water should drown him, oxygen will give him the feeling of survival but piss two should do the trick.
#23
Gary Davidson 4 years ago
Because that "grandma" is Wally Funk. She's 82 years old and frankly the other 3 men are not even worthy to be in her presence. Mary Wallace "Wally" Funk (born February 1, 1939) is an American aviator, commercial astronaut, and Goodwill Ambassador. She was the first female air safety investigator for the National Transportation Safety Board, the first female civilian flight instructor at Fort Sill, Oklahoma, and the first female Federal Aviation Agency inspector, as well as one of the Mercury 13.
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Marlowe Fitzpatrik 4 years ago
Yes, that teenager really pulls a convincing "best day of my life"-face. Totally convinced
Panda Kicki 4 years ago
The ones to the right might do, but what are the evil villain doing there?
Vicky Z 4 years ago
It was his father's ticket! He gave us his place for his son
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#24
Nilo Baranda 4 years ago
#24 It is public ownership. I partly own it and I am quite offended by these memes tbh.
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
Jeff can't you see how much you are hated ? Damn maybe you cant read. Did you really change your name form BOZOS?
Rodrigo Agostinho 4 years ago
its a private company, stocks dont matter to make a company public or not
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#25
Calypso poet 4 years ago
Awww, RIP Charlie Robinson. He just died on the 11th. Loved him on Night Court.
#26
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
Too bad we couldn't keep them like the picture suspended in space. Oh what a relief it is!
Bacony Cakes 4 years ago (edited)
he has tiny white balls because not even the h*rniest aliens want to f*ck the stonks guy
#27
#28
#29
Iggy 4 years ago
I suppose it makes a refreshing change from being up his own backside!
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#30
Valley Girl 4 years ago
I guess he got sick of f'ing only this planet and the human race. Wants a little variety
Lynn Morello 4 years ago
Space is already F#$ked. Have you seen how many Satellites and Space debris we have floating around Earth? Humans don't do much of ANYTHING and leave it clean, and the more money you have the worse it is.
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
We haven't enjoyed it . Space is in for another disappointment on the highest level.
#31
kurisutofu 4 years ago
yes but men shaped society so human's culture is indeed centered around penises. Even early religions had phallic symbols representing gods etc ...
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#32
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
Maybe next time we’ll blast them into space, but without the rockets.
#33
If Jeff Bezos Launched His Rocket In Japan (Fixed)
German Gargicevich 4 years ago
Here is a screen capture of the original Japanese broadcast. jeff-bezos...3eb1c0.jpg 
Raven DeathShade 4 years ago
Japan censors portions of private areas so you technically can't see what it is.
Load More Replies... Auntriarch 4 years ago (edited)
I thought they were making the name say Blue Gin.... Oh well I'll have another glass then
QuotedPrawn7490 4 years ago
Quick someone draw a space countryball saying "what are you going to do with me senpai"
#34
Hineao Wharehineao 4 years ago
No using the Fantastic Four guys my grandkids love theREAL Fantastic Four
#35
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Would that he had done so, using this method. Maybe next time his own employees will rise up and make it happen. Then they can bring his ex-wife in to take over running the company, or make it an employee-owned corporation.
Kim Lionessa 4 years ago
F**k that. Make employees shareholders and they run it themselves.
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#36
Brian Bennett 4 years ago
Well, maybe if he had a set of balls like this on earth he could have been called human!
#38
Gretchen Esquilin 4 years ago
He could've ended food insecurity in the country for thousands, but that's ok, you keep on going to space in your d*ck rocket.
CatWoman312 4 years ago (edited)
You can take your appreciation and shove it so far up your ass that it straightens your lazy eye you tool
Kirk Mckeever 4 years ago
"Low pay, long hours. and poor treatment, all led to me going into space for 6 minutes....Thank you!! I luv you!!"
Vermillion Ace #443 4 years ago
No, I don't want your thanks for giving space your puny tip! Thank me when your employees get treated like humans, you boner!
Dan Steely 4 years ago
Which is why I never have, nor ever will, give Amazon a dime. Not for product nor services.
mary boone 4 years ago
big deal. You likely have and didn't know it was an Amazon company. ;-)
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#40
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
No, wothOUT humans aboard. Bezos just doesn’t meet all the requirements to be considered human.
Katy McMouse 4 years ago
WHY is this incredible? I mean, seriously. I know most of us have asked what the money from just one of those flights could have done here, on Earth. Talk about not reading the world, let alone the room.
Rachel Cowley 4 years ago
With his tip to space or splashed around in the kiddie pool of space.
Korrie Broos 4 years ago
Only reason why Jeff Bezos went to space was to try and get as far away as possible from his ex-wife.
#41
Tiny Dynamine 4 years ago
Yep. I use it to look for things then find it on ebay.
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Add New Image
What do you think ?
les 4 years ago
branson begs the gov for cash in 2020, goes to space in 2021 and we're supposed to go well thats good, meanwhile bezos treats his staff like crap and musk threatens to fire people if they dont come to work during a governmemnt mandated lockdown and somehow we're supposed to think these 3 tax dodgers are people to look up to? well screw them, I respect the flat earth guy that died a couple of years ago more
Kevin J. Henning 4 years ago
I don't mind Jeff Bezos going into space at all. It's the thought of him coming back that troubles me.
Hannah Edwards 4 years ago
Shocking waste of resources. The future shouldn’t be in space, it should be unfucking the Earth and living more sustainably. I don’t suppose that’s in the interests of men who have made their billions based on consumerism.
Bee / she/her 4 years ago
What the actual F? Actually going to space in a d**k for NO REASON while people are starving because they cannot afford to live with the wages they are given while working for most of their day? Is this a dystopian novel? I seriously can't believe this is actually real. Why won't he share money with anyone? Why not donate to good causes that could save lives? Why not increase workers' wages? F**k you, Bezos.
Carol Emory 4 years ago
You wonder if the penis shape was done on purpose. Not by Bezos, but by the engineers that worked with him. Like when Phil Donahue had the editor for The Enquirer on his show...the make up crew made him look like Mimi from the Drew Carey Show. A subtle "F*** You!"
M O'Connell 4 years ago
It was the unfortunate combination of the booster having a maximum diameter determined by what could be moved by truck, and the capsule needing to have maximum internal volume relative to the aerodynamic stability of its shape. The "flare" beneath the capsule is actually a very complex piece of aerodynamic engineering which stabilizes the booster during its descent. It serves a similar function to the grid fins on a SpaceX rocket.
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Rissie 4 years ago
To say the least... Sure rockets always look somewhat like d***s, but this is pushing it.
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Thorfin Wolfsbane 4 years ago
Aliens: we find a flat round shape is ideal for space travel, it can hover and change directions well. Humans: but that won’t look like my d**k at all!
les 4 years ago
branson begs the gov for cash in 2020, goes to space in 2021 and we're supposed to go well thats good, meanwhile bezos treats his staff like crap and musk threatens to fire people if they dont come to work during a governmemnt mandated lockdown and somehow we're supposed to think these 3 tax dodgers are people to look up to? well screw them, I respect the flat earth guy that died a couple of years ago more
Kevin J. Henning 4 years ago
I don't mind Jeff Bezos going into space at all. It's the thought of him coming back that troubles me.
Hannah Edwards 4 years ago
Shocking waste of resources. The future shouldn’t be in space, it should be unfucking the Earth and living more sustainably. I don’t suppose that’s in the interests of men who have made their billions based on consumerism.
Bee / she/her 4 years ago
What the actual F? Actually going to space in a d**k for NO REASON while people are starving because they cannot afford to live with the wages they are given while working for most of their day? Is this a dystopian novel? I seriously can't believe this is actually real. Why won't he share money with anyone? Why not donate to good causes that could save lives? Why not increase workers' wages? F**k you, Bezos.
Carol Emory 4 years ago
You wonder if the penis shape was done on purpose. Not by Bezos, but by the engineers that worked with him. Like when Phil Donahue had the editor for The Enquirer on his show...the make up crew made him look like Mimi from the Drew Carey Show. A subtle "F*** You!"
M O'Connell 4 years ago
It was the unfortunate combination of the booster having a maximum diameter determined by what could be moved by truck, and the capsule needing to have maximum internal volume relative to the aerodynamic stability of its shape. The "flare" beneath the capsule is actually a very complex piece of aerodynamic engineering which stabilizes the booster during its descent. It serves a similar function to the grid fins on a SpaceX rocket.
Load More Replies... Rissie 4 years ago
To say the least... Sure rockets always look somewhat like d***s, but this is pushing it.
Load More Replies... Thorfin Wolfsbane 4 years ago
Aliens: we find a flat round shape is ideal for space travel, it can hover and change directions well. Humans: but that won’t look like my d**k at all!
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