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14
“Italian” In-Laws In Disbelief After Woman Reveals Their True Heritage Due To Hubby’s DNA Test
Interview With Expert
A person’s cultural and genetic heritage is often very meaningful to them. It holds stories and ties to their ancestors, and also explains many aspects of their family. That’s why people put a lot of effort into finding out their roots and upholding the values associated with them.
One family who strongly believed that they were Italian got a huge shock when their in-law revealed the results of the DNA test her husband took. In that moment, their entire perception of who they were shifted, and they got very mad at her.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
People who make assumptions about their genetic heritage may be shocked to learn exactly which sources their DNA comes from
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that her in-laws always believed that they were Italian and that that dictated their food, personality, jokes, and even slurs
Image credits: Ahmet Kurt / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
When her husband did a DNA test, he found out that there was only 0.7% Italian heritage in his bloodline, and that it was mainly a mix of German and Spanish
Image credits: Louis Hansel / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The couple revealed this shocking news to the man’s grandparents, who took it sportingly, but when the rest of the family found out, they were furious
Image credits: bellabelleell
The poster even had to correct her in-laws about using Italian slurs, but they refused to change and made it clear they’d always be “Italian”
The poster shared that she always had to deal with her in-laws proclaiming how Italian they were. They let their heritage dictate their personality, choices, food, and jokes. So, the woman knew right from the start how important their cultural background was to them, which is why she was shocked when her husband took a DNA test.
To get an insight into why the family felt the way they did, Bored Panda reached out to Amy Johnson Crow. She is the founder and lead educator at Generations Connection and is the host of the channel, ‘Genealogy with Amy Johnson Crow.’ She is the author of ‘31 Days to Better Genealogy’ and the creator of the ‘52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks’ writing challenge.
We asked Amy why people place so much importance on their genetic heritage. She said, “I think people confuse [it] with cultural heritage. I don’t know the specifics of this family, but there are instances where you could have a couple of generations in one country and your family ‘identifies’ with that heritage.”
“However, the genetics are looking back 1,000 years. Just being in a country for a couple of generations doesn’t give much opportunity for that DNA to get into the family. Even when the genetics do match where a family is from, I think the appeal of DNA tests points to the human condition of wanting to connect.”
“The DNA companies have made it look like all you have to do is give some spit and, poof, instant heritage. It misses the nuance of the realities of migration and what that DNA test is really showing,” she added. Therefore, it seems like the family might have misunderstood their grandparents’ background and ran with the idea of being Italian, just a bit too much.
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
The poster’s husband told his grandparents the truth about their heritage, and they took the news well. However, he was afraid of telling the rest of the family. Eventually, at a joint meal, they told everyone the news. Nobody could believe that they weren’t Italian, and they immediately began getting defensive.
Since the OP worked as a biologist, she tried to clear everyone’s doubts, but they still couldn’t accept the fact. The family also kept making Italian jokes and dropping slurs without thinking. It seems like the DNA revelation really rattled them and affected the way they perceived themselves, which is why it was so hard to accept.
We asked Amy whether it was right for the OP to reveal the information about the family DNA. She said, “Obviously, I don’t know the dynamics of this family, but it sounds like she gave the information at a good time, and even explained that siblings’ results can vary.”
“The ethnicity estimates from any company are the least useful and least reliable/accurate part of the test. If the family truly wanted to know their heritage, they really should look at the paper trail: that would tell them not only their origins, but also the stories of their ancestors. You won’t get that from just a DNA test,” she added.
When people believe in something for such a long time, the truth might be a hard pill to swallow. It’s good that the woman let them know about their heritage, but it’s not her responsibility to get them to accept the fact. Hopefully, they come to terms with what their real bloodline is and embrace it just as they did when they thought they were Italian.
Do you think the woman was right to reveal such a secret? Let us know your thoughts down below.
Netizens sided with the woman and felt that her in-laws needed a reality check
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What do you think ?
greenideas 4 months ago
Here's a novel idea: let's not use slurs regardless of where we're from.
Ben Aziza 4 months ago (edited)
Nah fk it they can be terms of endearment when all are involved. This this not mosque or church. Just dont go throwing them at strangers.
Load More Replies... Bailey 4 months ago (edited)
Claiming personality of physical traits because you think someone in your ancestry was from a specific place is in general abnoxious. However, I also think the obsession on DNA is also disturbing. Say the grandparents in this post were born in Italy. Their parents were born and lived their their whole lives, but the generation before had migrated from what would become Germany. Poster is basically saying that because they do not share a piece of DNA with other people clustered in what is considered Italy, they are not allowed to be considered part that culture, even though generations of their family could have lived in Italy
LakotaWolf (she/her) 4 months ago
I feel a small personal measure of that. I'm white af, but I was adopted at birth into a Hispanic family of Mexican-Americans. I was raised immersed in Hispanic culture. I learned Spanish and English simultaneously. I had a friggin Quinceañera! XD But I'm not Hispanic, I'm white. (I think my DNA test said primarily Irish/Scottish/generic European mutt.) I don't pretend I'm a Mexican, per se, but culturally, I sort of "identify" as a Hispanic person, if that makes any sense. And when I was in my 20s, I had a friend who had been adopted at birth from Vietnam and had been raised in America. He hated to be called "Vietnamese". He would say "No, I'm an American." Genetically speaking, he was Vietnamese (he wasn't denying that aspect.) But he felt he was American; that his identity did NOT just derive from his DNA/ethnicity. In OP's case, her SIL is being weird, but I do agree with you - DNA isn't everything and people can be raised in a country/culture that isn't "genetically" theirs.
Load More Replies...
Dragons Exist 4 months ago
It's pretty weird, considering how many of us are super patriotic yet also desperately want to be not-American because of their DNA
Load More Replies...
Paul C 4 months ago
I've had two DNA tests done. In one, I was 70% English (mainly on my mother's side) and a mix of other northern European countries. In the other, I was 70% German (again from my mother's side) and a mix of mainly northern European others (with 0% English). It's not an exact science. Besides, history / dna tells you where you came from, your life now tells you who you are at the moment. In the future, who knows who you will be.
Sunny Day 4 months ago
If grandparents were born and/or raised in Italy, they are Italian, no matter what DNA says.
Noltha 4 months ago
And, as one of the commenters pointed out, the ancestry tests are based on some statistical frequency of some genes. Even the Italians living for centuries in Italy do not all have the "typical italian" genes and may have genes which statistically appear often in other nationalities.
Load More Replies...
Lee Gilliland 4 months ago
I did the same DNA test twice and didn't get the same answer, although the results were ~ within 20% of each other. They're not exact.
Nikki Sevven 4 months ago
I get honoring your ethnicities, but don't get people who aggressively make it their identity.
Vinnie 4 months ago (edited)
For my ancestry, here's the long answer: "Well, borders change, people move around, records get lost, and I would have to do a DNA test." For a short answer, "I'm not sure." If someone tries to guess: "That's possible". So yes, Hittite and Dorset culture are possible.
marianne eliza 4 months ago
In a related vein, read about that dad who freaked when his daughter was born with dark skin. It's on Bored Panda too.
brittany 4 months ago
my bio mom used to spin yarns (is that the phrase?) about us. we were apparetly related to the following: old king cole (yeah from the nursery rhyme), the secretary to Thomas Jefferson and the secretary to Abraham Lincoln, davy Crockett, daniel boone, king henry the 8th, richard the 3rd, king endward the first, william wallace, mary queen of scotts, the peacher who spoke at the church Martin Luther King Jrs mother attended, ad im pretty sure there was more im not thinking of. oh ald we were also native american somewhere in there as well. honestly it took a long time to unravel and some of the things she said were true, some where not. but honestly, im just an average white lady living in america. in a world of 8 billion people im not sure it matters.
greenideas 4 months ago
Here's a novel idea: let's not use slurs regardless of where we're from.
Ben Aziza 4 months ago (edited)
Nah fk it they can be terms of endearment when all are involved. This this not mosque or church. Just dont go throwing them at strangers.
Load More Replies... Bailey 4 months ago (edited)
Claiming personality of physical traits because you think someone in your ancestry was from a specific place is in general abnoxious. However, I also think the obsession on DNA is also disturbing. Say the grandparents in this post were born in Italy. Their parents were born and lived their their whole lives, but the generation before had migrated from what would become Germany. Poster is basically saying that because they do not share a piece of DNA with other people clustered in what is considered Italy, they are not allowed to be considered part that culture, even though generations of their family could have lived in Italy
LakotaWolf (she/her) 4 months ago
I feel a small personal measure of that. I'm white af, but I was adopted at birth into a Hispanic family of Mexican-Americans. I was raised immersed in Hispanic culture. I learned Spanish and English simultaneously. I had a friggin Quinceañera! XD But I'm not Hispanic, I'm white. (I think my DNA test said primarily Irish/Scottish/generic European mutt.) I don't pretend I'm a Mexican, per se, but culturally, I sort of "identify" as a Hispanic person, if that makes any sense. And when I was in my 20s, I had a friend who had been adopted at birth from Vietnam and had been raised in America. He hated to be called "Vietnamese". He would say "No, I'm an American." Genetically speaking, he was Vietnamese (he wasn't denying that aspect.) But he felt he was American; that his identity did NOT just derive from his DNA/ethnicity. In OP's case, her SIL is being weird, but I do agree with you - DNA isn't everything and people can be raised in a country/culture that isn't "genetically" theirs.
Load More Replies... Dragons Exist 4 months ago
It's pretty weird, considering how many of us are super patriotic yet also desperately want to be not-American because of their DNA
Load More Replies... Paul C 4 months ago
I've had two DNA tests done. In one, I was 70% English (mainly on my mother's side) and a mix of other northern European countries. In the other, I was 70% German (again from my mother's side) and a mix of mainly northern European others (with 0% English). It's not an exact science. Besides, history / dna tells you where you came from, your life now tells you who you are at the moment. In the future, who knows who you will be.
Sunny Day 4 months ago
If grandparents were born and/or raised in Italy, they are Italian, no matter what DNA says.
Noltha 4 months ago
And, as one of the commenters pointed out, the ancestry tests are based on some statistical frequency of some genes. Even the Italians living for centuries in Italy do not all have the "typical italian" genes and may have genes which statistically appear often in other nationalities.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 4 months ago
I did the same DNA test twice and didn't get the same answer, although the results were ~ within 20% of each other. They're not exact.
Nikki Sevven 4 months ago
I get honoring your ethnicities, but don't get people who aggressively make it their identity.
Vinnie 4 months ago (edited)
For my ancestry, here's the long answer: "Well, borders change, people move around, records get lost, and I would have to do a DNA test." For a short answer, "I'm not sure." If someone tries to guess: "That's possible". So yes, Hittite and Dorset culture are possible.
marianne eliza 4 months ago
In a related vein, read about that dad who freaked when his daughter was born with dark skin. It's on Bored Panda too.
brittany 4 months ago
my bio mom used to spin yarns (is that the phrase?) about us. we were apparetly related to the following: old king cole (yeah from the nursery rhyme), the secretary to Thomas Jefferson and the secretary to Abraham Lincoln, davy Crockett, daniel boone, king henry the 8th, richard the 3rd, king endward the first, william wallace, mary queen of scotts, the peacher who spoke at the church Martin Luther King Jrs mother attended, ad im pretty sure there was more im not thinking of. oh ald we were also native american somewhere in there as well. honestly it took a long time to unravel and some of the things she said were true, some where not. but honestly, im just an average white lady living in america. in a world of 8 billion people im not sure it matters.
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