Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

“He Deleted Everything”: Woman Questions Husband’s Motives On The Day Of His Surgery
Woman looking suspicious and confused while checking husband's phone during surgery, lying on a couch indoors.

“He Deleted Everything”: Woman Questions Husband’s Motives On The Day Of His Surgery

40

ADVERTISEMENT

One of the strongest foundations of any relationship is trust. But what happens when that foundation starts to feel shaky?

This Redditor’s husband was scheduled for surgery, and before heading into the operating room, he handed his wife his belongings—including his phone. That’s when she noticed something unusual: he had suddenly deleted all of his social media apps.

Feeling unsettled, she turned to the internet for advice, unsure if that meant he was hiding something or if she was simply overthinking. Scroll down to read her full story and decide for yourself.

RELATED:

    As her husband underwent surgery, the woman made a surprising discovery

    Woman looking suspicious and confused while checking phone during husband's surgery at home on the couch.

    Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / freepik (not the actual photo)

    Every social media app had been deleted from his phone, and she began to suspect he could be keeping secrets

    Wife feeling suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone deleted before surgery for medical treatment

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text excerpt describing symptoms and ER admission amid wife’s suspicious and confused feelings checking husband’s phone during surgery.

    Wife left suspicious and confused while holding husband’s phone and belongings during his surgery under general anesthesia

    Man in hospital gown sitting on bed, appearing worried during surgery, reflecting suspicion and confusion of wife checking phone.

    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Wife feels suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery with deleted social media apps noticed.

    Text excerpt showing confusion after checking husband's phone during surgery, reflecting suspicious feelings.

    Wife left confused and suspicious after checking husband’s phone during surgery, noticing deleted social media accounts.

    Young man sitting by a window, looking focused and suspicious while checking his smartphone indoors.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text showing wife reflecting on past issues with husband messaging an ex-girlfriend, leaving her suspicious and confused

    Wife left suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery, feeling exhausted and worried at hospital.

    Wife left suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery, feeling worried and sleepless.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Image credits: Electrical-Gap2122

    What to do if you can’t stop doubting your partner

    Image credits: cookie_studio / freepik (not the actual photo)

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Trust can feel complicated. As adults, many of us have lived through disappointments, heartbreaks, and broken promises. It often takes time to let someone in, open up, and build a relationship. Yet once that trust is broken, it can feel like it happens in an instant.

    One survey found that only 70% of people say they completely trust their partner. While that might seem like a solid number, it also means nearly a third don’t, which is sobering when you think about it.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Another study by the Pew Research Center shows just how fragile trust can be: about one in three people in committed relationships admit to checking their partner’s phone. That kind of doubt can weigh heavily on a relationship. Left unchecked, mistrust can quickly snowball into suspicion, anxiety, and constant worry.

    So, how can you strengthen trust? Contemporary mental health service Self Space offers some helpful advice:

    1. Be open, acknowledge feelings, and practice vulnerability

    When mistrust starts brewing, silence only makes it worse. If you need reassurance, ask for it. If you’re feeling insecure, share it. Let your partner in on how you feel, what you hope for, and how you want to show up for each other.

    2. Assume your partner has good intentions

    Not every mistake is a betrayal. Sometimes people simply mess up without meaning harm. Before jumping to conclusions, consider that it could be a misunderstanding rather than deliberate hurt.

    3. Communicate honestly about important issues

    Make time to check in daily and talk about how things are going. Don’t let problems pile up—bring them into the open. Start small and speak from your own perspective: “I feel…,” “I notice…,” “I wonder….”

    4. Notice how past experiences shape your present

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Take a moment to reflect: is your doubt coming from what your partner has actually done, from your own insecurities, or maybe both? Sometimes pain from earlier relationships can quietly influence how much we trust today.

    5. Hear your partner’s side

    Give them room to share their view. Ask questions like: “How did you see things? What was your experience? How did it feel for you?” Listening with curiosity can open the door to rebuilding trust.

    6. Trust your intuition

    Pay attention to red flags, and don’t ignore your gut feelings. If something doesn’t sit right, bring it up. Voicing concerns early prevents them from festering.

    7. Be clear about your needs

    Getting upset when your needs aren’t met is natural, but have you made them clear? Your partner isn’t a mind reader. Often, it’s about teaching them how to meet your needs so both of you feel supported.

    At the end of the day, trust is built step by step—through openness, honesty, and patience. It’s fragile but not unfixable, and with consistent effort from both partners, it can grow stronger than ever.

    Many readers found the husband’s actions incredibly suspicious

    Text post from a forum explaining why a husband’s deleted phone apps raise suspicion during surgery, causing confusion.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text excerpt discussing suspicion and confusion after a wife checks husband’s phone during surgery, highlighting secretive behavior.

    Wife left suspicious and confused checking husband’s phone reveals new out-of-character behavior during surgery period.

    Text post showing a confession from a suspicious and confused wife checking husband’s phone during surgery.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text message conversation discussing suspicion after husband deleted apps on phone during surgery, causing confusion and concern.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Comment discussing suspicion and confusion over inappropriate messaging found on husband’s phone during surgery.

    Comment about husband deleting social media before surgery, leaving wife suspicious and confused after checking phone.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment suggesting to download apps to find saved passwords on husband’s phone, highlighting suspicion during surgery.

    Comment on Reddit about suspicion and confusion after checking husband’s phone during surgery, expressing doubt about repeated infidelity.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Comment discussing suspicious behavior of a husband hiding messages and content, related to wife left suspicious and confused.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Comment discussing how checking a husband’s phone during surgery might reveal suspicious apps, raising confusion and suspicion.

    Comment discussing unusual privacy habits when undergoing risky activities like surgery, highlighting distrust and suspicion.

    Comment explaining why a husband deleted messages from his phone before surgery, leaving wife suspicious and confused.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Comment expressing concerns about men’s behavior after transplant, relating to wife left suspicious and confused after surgery.

    Wife left suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery reveals deleted messages and secrets.

    Screenshot of an online comment showing suspicion and confusion after wife checked husband’s phone during surgery discussion.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Reddit comment discussing suspicious behavior and fear of snooping after wife checked husband’s phone during surgery, confused and concerned.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing suspicious phone activity, highlighting wife’s confusion during husband’s surgery.

    Comment discussing trust and loyalty issues after a wife checks husband’s phone, leaving her suspicious and confused.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Commenter advising about cheating concerns after wife checked husband’s phone during surgery, expressing suspicion and trust issues.

    Comment text on a white background discussing suspicion and worry after checking husband’s phone during surgery.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Wife feels suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery, uncovering deleted texts.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Text comment expressing suspicion and concern about husband hiding something, related to wife checking phone during surgery.

    Others chimed in with similar stories of their own

    Wife suspicious and confused checking husband’s phone during surgery reveals trust issues and emotional turmoil.

    Comment expressing sympathy for a wife left suspicious and confused after checking husband’s phone during surgery.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT

    Poll Question

    Total votes ·

    Thanks! Check out the results:

    Total votes ·
    Share on Facebook

    Explore more of these tags

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter from Ukraine with a master’s degree in International Communication. Having covered everything from education, finance, and marketing to art, pop culture, and memes, she now brings her storytelling skills to Bored Panda. For the past five years, she’s been living and working in Vilnius, Lithuania.

    Read less »
    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Oleksandra Kyryliuk

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Oleksandra is an experienced copywriter from Ukraine with a master’s degree in International Communication. Having covered everything from education, finance, and marketing to art, pop culture, and memes, she now brings her storytelling skills to Bored Panda. For the past five years, she’s been living and working in Vilnius, Lithuania.

    What do you think ?
    Jeremy James
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, come on, lady! "My husband has a shoebox filled with missing women's ID cards and some jewelry. Should I be concerned, or am I just being paranoid?"

    VNES101
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LMAO! It's probably nothing.

    Load More Replies...
    Rika
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would also delete a lot of messages before going to surgery because the risks are low, but I might not wake up and I wouldn't want anyone to read my private messages after I passed. It's not because I'm cheating or hiding something dark, it's a matter of respect for my friends: in our private conversations, they shared some things with *me* only. Even if none of those things are huge life-changing secrets, they didn't give me permission to share them with anyone else, I think the least I can do is to make sure our conversations remain private.

    Anthony Elmore
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Interesting point. Another perspective is the overly paranoid type of personality. I say paranoid, it's more of a privacy thing. I don't have conversation with others for the purpose of bystanders to just up and read them. Same goes for things like internet history and file data. I am meticulous about cleaning up tracks, regardless of whether or not I've done anything wrong (see, that's the overly paranoid bit). To a fault, actually, as I'm going to look suspicious as f**k if anyone bothers to try and find my tracks. Still, I doubt this is the case for the Husband. They'd probably have noticed a pattern in the husband's behavior long before the operation. Just worth consideration. That picture of a cat that the entire internet has seen may not be private, but the context in which it was sent to me was, and I'd like to keep it that way.

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Southie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    while he was in surgery his phone kept getting notifications.....notifications to where? If he deleted all his accounts he wouldn't be getting notifications...unless it was just texts or emails in which case Wife could read them....just sayin...

    Load More Comments
    Jeremy James
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, come on, lady! "My husband has a shoebox filled with missing women's ID cards and some jewelry. Should I be concerned, or am I just being paranoid?"

    VNES101
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LMAO! It's probably nothing.

    Load More Replies...
    Rika
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would also delete a lot of messages before going to surgery because the risks are low, but I might not wake up and I wouldn't want anyone to read my private messages after I passed. It's not because I'm cheating or hiding something dark, it's a matter of respect for my friends: in our private conversations, they shared some things with *me* only. Even if none of those things are huge life-changing secrets, they didn't give me permission to share them with anyone else, I think the least I can do is to make sure our conversations remain private.

    Anthony Elmore
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Interesting point. Another perspective is the overly paranoid type of personality. I say paranoid, it's more of a privacy thing. I don't have conversation with others for the purpose of bystanders to just up and read them. Same goes for things like internet history and file data. I am meticulous about cleaning up tracks, regardless of whether or not I've done anything wrong (see, that's the overly paranoid bit). To a fault, actually, as I'm going to look suspicious as f**k if anyone bothers to try and find my tracks. Still, I doubt this is the case for the Husband. They'd probably have noticed a pattern in the husband's behavior long before the operation. Just worth consideration. That picture of a cat that the entire internet has seen may not be private, but the context in which it was sent to me was, and I'd like to keep it that way.

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    Southie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    while he was in surgery his phone kept getting notifications.....notifications to where? If he deleted all his accounts he wouldn't be getting notifications...unless it was just texts or emails in which case Wife could read them....just sayin...

    Load More Comments
    You May Like
    Related on Bored Panda
    Popular on Bored Panda
    Trending on Bored Panda
    Also on Bored Panda
    ADVERTISEMENT