“My Husband Wants To Leave Me For Someone Else While I'm Heavily Pregnant With His Child”
The final weeks of a first pregnancy are a whirlwind of anticipation and anxiety. You’re preparing for the biggest change of your life, nesting, and leaning on your partner for support. It’s supposed to be a time of shared excitement, a sacred calm before the beautiful storm of parenthood begins.
But for one woman, that sacred time was shattered by a devastating confession. Just three weeks before her due date, her husband told her he had met someone else and didn’t love her anymore, turning her final trimester into a nightmare of betrayal and uncertainty.
More info: Reddit
The final weeks of a first pregnancy should be a time of shared joy, keeping calm, and counting down the sleeps till the baby comes
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While she was on an overseas work trip, her husband of six years met someone else
Image credits: odua / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Three weeks before their baby was due, he confessed he had ‘strong feelings’ for the new woman and didn’t love her anymore
Image credits: senivpetro / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The man, who has untreated bipolar disorder, became ‘uncomfortable’ even being in the same room as his pregnant wife
Image credits: bilahata / Freepik (not the actual photo)
She later learned he had a history of this behavior, a toxic pattern of love bombing and discarding partners
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In a bold move, she contacted the new girlfriend to warn her about his manipulative patterns
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She was heartbroken and was preparing to give birth without him and navigate the world of co-parenting
A woman, 36 weeks pregnant, returned early from an overseas work trip with a gut feeling that something was terribly wrong. Her intuition was brutally correct. Her husband of six years confessed he had met someone else, a 23-year-old he’d known for a mere three weeks. He had no interest in working things out, and just like that, their marriage was over, three weeks before their baby was due.
The aftermath was a confusing hellscape of emotional whiplash. The husband, who had once been excited about their planned baby, was now “so uncomfortable” around his pregnant wife that he could barely be in the same room. He claimed he’d been “masking his true feelings” for years, a convenient excuse that did little to explain his sudden, cruel detachment and his all-consuming infatuation with the new woman.
As the woman tried to navigate the emotional wreckage, a crucial piece of the puzzle fell into place. An old friend of her husband’s revealed that this was a pattern: he had a history of “love bombing” women, clinging to them, and sharing his depressive thoughts to create a fast, intense bond. Armed with this new information, she made a bold move: she contacted the new girlfriend to warn her.
Heartbroken but resolute, she’s trying to figure out how to co-parent with a man who seems to be in the grip of a mental health crisis and a toxic pattern of behavior. She is preparing for the birth of her first child not with a partner, but with the support of her family and friends, a reluctant solo pilot in a journey that was supposed to be a partnership.
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The husband’s sudden and intense infatuation with the new woman, described as love bombing, is a behavior that can be closely linked to the manic phases of bipolar disorder, which the wife notes he is unofficially diagnosed with. As explained by the Bay Area CBT Center, the idealization phase of love bombing the grandiosity and impulsivity that are hallmarks of a manic episode.
The equally sudden and cruel shift from a loving husband to a man who is “uncomfortable” around his pregnant wife is a devastating but common experience that mental health counselor Trish Glynn Carey calls a “bipolar discard.” This is when a person with bipolar disorder abruptly turns cold and devalues a long-term partner, often during a manic or depressive episode.
The wife’s heartbreaking statement that she hopes to “know what it is I have done” is the tragic part of this dynamic. The discard often has nothing to do with the partner’s actions and everything to do with the internal chaos of the illness.
This pattern, which a friend later confirmed he had a history of, makes the situation incredibly volatile and dangerous for both the wife and the new baby. His untreated bipolar disorder means his ability to “step up and be a good enough parent” is highly questionable. His current state makes him an unstable and unreliable partner. Her fear is a correct and rational assessment of a very serious situation.
How would you have handled this situation? Let us know in the comments!
The internet rallied around her, offering support and validating her fears about her husband’s mental state
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Honestly, she sounds way too calm for the situation she's describing. I know that people do not always act the same way, but I feel as though the first thing I would do is kick out his cheating self out of the house. Part of me think she sounds like she's hoping that he'll come to his sense and see what he's giving up. Sad situation all around.
It reads like she's in shock, it lasts quite a long time in these situations. Took me almost a year to get over mine.
Load More Replies...Be sure your divorce lawyer includes ex’s mental health treatment and monitoring in the custody agreement. He can see the child if he’s been a good boy taking his meds like he’s supposed to, but any hint he’s off his meds and visitation is cancelled, potentially long term until he gets himself right again. Now, as to his affair partner; what happens when SHE gets pregnant? Same scenario? Is he going to drop babies all over the place and never see any of them because he refuses to seek help for his mental health issues? I would try to out the kibosh on that s**t any way I could.
She needs to stop worrying about her soon to be ex. He doesn’t deserve a chance to be a good co-parent. He threw that away when he shacked up with his new mistress. She needs to destroy him.
If you use "destroy" to mean revenge, here's my two cents': setting out to make someone's life hellish requires time, effort and mental energy. The OP might prefer to channel her low energy into caring for her child and proecting her finances. If you meant to say "get alimony and child support", that's a perfectly reasonable use of time and energy.
Load More Replies...Honestly, she sounds way too calm for the situation she's describing. I know that people do not always act the same way, but I feel as though the first thing I would do is kick out his cheating self out of the house. Part of me think she sounds like she's hoping that he'll come to his sense and see what he's giving up. Sad situation all around.
It reads like she's in shock, it lasts quite a long time in these situations. Took me almost a year to get over mine.
Load More Replies...Be sure your divorce lawyer includes ex’s mental health treatment and monitoring in the custody agreement. He can see the child if he’s been a good boy taking his meds like he’s supposed to, but any hint he’s off his meds and visitation is cancelled, potentially long term until he gets himself right again. Now, as to his affair partner; what happens when SHE gets pregnant? Same scenario? Is he going to drop babies all over the place and never see any of them because he refuses to seek help for his mental health issues? I would try to out the kibosh on that s**t any way I could.
She needs to stop worrying about her soon to be ex. He doesn’t deserve a chance to be a good co-parent. He threw that away when he shacked up with his new mistress. She needs to destroy him.
If you use "destroy" to mean revenge, here's my two cents': setting out to make someone's life hellish requires time, effort and mental energy. The OP might prefer to channel her low energy into caring for her child and proecting her finances. If you meant to say "get alimony and child support", that's a perfectly reasonable use of time and energy.
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