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Hey Pandas, What’s The Strangest Thing You’ve Found Out About A Friend, Family Member, Or Neighbor By Accident? (Closed)
Sometimes we stumble across information about people we know and it takes us totally by surprise. What's your story?
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#1
That my paternal grandma is weird as f**k. She gave me some underwear as a gift a few years ago and they originally had a little plastic pearl on the front but my grandma decided to cut it off so that she could sell them and make money. She also demanded it back a while ago for some reason. I also found out that when I was 12, she found a groom for me who I would marry once I’m of legal age to do so. Honestly everything she’s done is very weird and she’s a huge narcissist as well and belittles people who are not her
Final score:
21points
jolie laide 2 years ago
Ooof, I'm so sorry about your grandmother. Can I ask, are you Indian? One of my old coworkers told a story very similar to yours, about her own paternal grandmother. In my coworkers case, her grandmother was always groom hunting for her and once she settled on someone (never for very long), she'd buy fabric and beads, etc. to one day make a wedding dress for my coworker. Apparently grandma had gone through quite a selection of grooms, and ended up with a LOT of fabric and beads because once she discarded a potential groom, whatever she bought at the time couldn't be used anymore. According to my coworker, she was unaware of all of this until after she finished university and her parents had to move her grandma in to live with them after some surgeries. They found her hoard of fabrics, etc. and I guess it was... a lot.
Stardust she/her (Submission author) 2 years ago
Yes, I’m Indian. Was anything done with the fabrics and beads later on?
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Stardust she/her (Submission author) 2 years ago
I don’t know the the guy is, only my grandmother does
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RELATED:
#2
I found out that my mom married my military dad to take trips around the world. It's not a love marriage. And she told me that if it had to be done over again, she wouldn't have had any children. It was not easy to find a card on Mother's Day! ("Mom, you're so loving! Mom, you've encouraged me so much!") I had to find one that said, "Have a nice day." 😅
Final score:
20points
IYAAYAS64 2 years ago
I am truly sorry for you. My ex the biological father of my 3 kids was a narcissistic, abusive horrible excuse for a human being. But my hand to God I’d go through all his BS again just so I could have my kids. I can only imagine how that statement made you feel and my heart breaks for you truly.
jolie laide 2 years ago
Ooof, yeah that's rough. I'm so sorry. :( What about your Dad, hopefully he feels differently and you have a better relationship with him?
Frances Pitchounetta (Submission author) 2 years ago (edited)
Unfortunately not: he was a little too "military". But it is okay. I learned that over time, it's better to choose your own family. So I'm in good company, I have a good and very nice boyfriend and I have golden in-laws. 😊
Load More Replies... #3
My maternal grandmother tried to kill her first child when he was an infant. She threw him off the back of a boat; fortunately, there was a witness who dove in and saved him. He only survived because he was wrapped in swaddling layers, which remained buoyant because of trapped air bubbles. It’s such a sad story: she got pregnant as the result of date rape, and her parents forced he to marry her rapist. She was a bitterly unhappy woman all of her life.
Final score:
20points
jolie laide 2 years ago
Damn, stories like these are so crushing. Even worse, is that it's 2023 and a lot of places in the world are still like this while others are trying to retract and go backwards.
SingingCatMom 2 years ago
Yeah.....like the US. Going backwards as fast as we can. I spend my twenties fighting for women's equality. Now I gotta do it all over again in my seventies.
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Janet Siler 2 years ago
more sadness is the unspoken fact: her maternal grandfather is a rapist
#4
This isn't really strange, but rather heartwarming. My dad passed away in September 2022. He was kind of a bum, dirty, didn't take care of himself, and lived in a gross trailer on my aunt's property. He had this backpack that he carried his few belongings in everywhere he went. After he passed, my aunt was going through that bag and found weed, cigarettes, beef jerky, a few other things like chargers and clothes and such, and in the very front pocket were a few feathers. I was born in California, and that's where he lived, so he would take me to Fort Bragg and to different beaches when I was little. We used to have this game to see who could collect more feathers, and after each game, he would stow the feathers I gave him in his backpack, and I would stow mine in my luggage to go home after our visit. I still have all my feathers in a bag on top of the box with his ashes, and he kept his inside his bag. The strange thing I found out about my dad was that he remembered the little moments. Sometimes I thought he didn't care about me, or that he forgot about me when I would go back to Ohio after our visits. Now that he's gone, I'm realizing that I was everything to him, and I'm realizing how much he really meant to me.
Final score:
20points
Kate Johnson 2 years ago
I'm so, so sorry for your loss. But, I'm glad that you've taken the time and thought and open mind and heart to learn more about him, and where his thoughts truly were: with you.
TurquoiseTzarina 2 years ago
Keep those precious memories close in your heart. This indeed was heartwarming.
#5
My father has multiple godchildren that he does not see/I have never met. We were driving through our city (his hometown) and he mentioned that he and his friend (who I had never heard of before) used to bike alongside the stream we drove by. I asked him if they had lost contact, and he said no, they'd remained friends until I was born, but stopped talking. Me being curious, I asked what happened (I was worried it was me being born), and he told me that his friend had a crazy girlfriend/ex who he had been trying to get away from/take custody of their children from for years. Eventually, the friend kind of just stopped fighting, and told my dad that they were together again. Now when I say the girlfriend was crazy, she was crazy. She thought my dad was trying to break her and his friend up (he wasn't, he was helping him with the legal stuff since he was in law school but that was it) and sent him a letter to his house threatening to either harm or kill him (he wouldn't say). At this point, my mom was pregnant with me, so my dad gave his friend a choice-cut the girlfriend out of his life, and he'd continue helping him with the custody stuff as best he could, or keep seeing her and lose my dad. His friend chose her, and my dad cut off all contact with him, and moved to a different address. I really hope that the kids are okay, from what I heard it sounded like their mother (the girlfriend) was mentally/verbally abusive, and I wouldn't be surprised if it got psychical as the kids grew up. Sadly, my dad never told me any names, so I can't look them up and see if they are okay. (side note: my dad tried to call CPS, but his friend wouldn't cooperate and sided with the girlfriend)
Final score:
19points
jolie laide 2 years ago
God, hearing about situations like this are tough let alone being in the middle of one, like your Dad. He did the right thing at the time though.
#6
My ex best friend, we will call her "Daisy" was once left alone in the car with a murderer. As a baby, her father was best buddies with this guy we will call "Joe". They knew each other from highschool and I guess Daisy's dad trusted Joe enough to drive her around and such. Now, her father and Joe are no longer friends, because they found out that Joe murdered their highschool principal. I don't know why, she doesn't know why, nobody knows why or nobody is willing to tell.
Final score:
19points
jolie laide 2 years ago
Yeah, sometimes you just never know. Makes you wonder who you're passing on the street or shopping in the same aisle with sometimes, doesn't it?
#7
My paternal grandmother had many children, four of whom suffered suspicious deaths before age 5. Evidence gathered over the years suggest she deliberately made her other children ill in order to get sympathy b/c she was basically a nutjob. She also did this to her grandchildren (I was one of them, which was why my mom didn't let us near the woman unattended again). After a lot of research, it's generally agreed she was a child abuser in the "Munchhausen Syndrome by Proxy" mode. Which makes her... a child abuser. Don't get all interested in her. Learn to look for victims of people like her, because it's abuse, nothing less, and murder at most.
Final score:
19points
cecilia kilian 2 years ago
I do not understand why you were downvoted. Munchhausen by Proxy is, as OP says, abuse. It often goes undetected because to most people, making your own child ill is unimaginable, obscene even. A normal parent's worst nightmare is their child having severe health issues.
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Leo Domitrix (Submission author) 2 years ago
The only commnet I have is to repeat: It's abuse. Don't make the psychology about the mother. She's a perp like any other. It also goes undetected b/c perps will not use the same doc or ER twice in a year so it doesn't show up in the system. And they'll skip using health insurance to avoid detection. We did some research on this (public health) and it's classic abuse. But for some reason people got fascinated by the perps and forgot the victims. :-(
Margaret H 2 years ago
I find it incredibly sad. How on earth do you learn to trust when the one you are expected to love is so untrustworthy? I hope you are doing better these days.
Load More Replies... Chl 2 years ago
Don't talk badly. Not condoning but talking badly is insulting to those w/ mental disorders.
Leo Domitrix (Submission author) 2 years ago (edited)
I have PTSD. Munchhausen Syndrome by Proxy is not a mental disorder any more or less than whatever ails any abuser. 1. I was a victim and 2. I have PTSD (a "mental disoder") and 3. didn't do this to other people for whatever reason. My grandmother was sick, no doubt, but her sickness didn't deserve more attention than her victims.
Load More Replies... #8
Several years ago, I received a letter from a Children's Services agency in another state, asking me if I was related to two children whose names I didn't recognize at first. When I showed the letter to my wife, she remembered that that they had lived in the same apartment complex as we did several years before, and that the boy was the same age as our oldest daughter. They played together often. We responded that we knew the children but weren't related to them. We guessed that since every apartment in that complex had the same street address, they connected our former address to theirs. This made us curious as to why they were looking for relatives of these children. A quick internet search told the story. Their father believed that he had caught their mother cheating on him and he unalived her. Dad was now in prison and Mom was gone, so authorities were looking for relatives with whom to place the children. Our daughter had played with their son many times both at our home and at theirs. We had talked with the parents on multiple occasions. We had no idea he was capable of such a thing. The kids would be young adults now. I hope they got placed in a good situation.
Final score:
16points
Marc Booker (Submission author) 2 years ago
Just yesterday, I pulled up a news story about the crime. The story contained his mug shot. It was kind of sobering to know that I had looked into that face so many times. In his mug shot he looked positively evil, but in person he was a really pleasant guy.
Load More Replies... #9
I had a family member who was involved with the Temple of the Sun cult. He wasn't a full-fledged member, but I think it was a lonely time in his life (recently divorced, kids mostly grown and living their own lives), and he fell in with a group that offered a type of camaraderie that he was lacking. Basically, they were using him for his contacts, and his willingness to help his "friends" even if the help required was shady. He fortunately figured it out before the ultimate end of most of the cultists, and getting arrested running guns for them probably helped save his life.
Final score:
16points
jolie laide 2 years ago
I'm glad your friend got out but also sorry to hear it took his arrest to do it. A lot of people brush off cults as something easily avoided and seen through, but for a chunk of the population that's not always the case.
Catastrophisticate (Submission author) 2 years ago
You're right... sorry, it's been a couple of decades :)
Load More Replies... #10
My husband had a brother who died after a stomach tube was inserted into his lung. The baby was never given a name and buried without a headstone. I WILL make it right
Final score:
16points
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
I don't understand. Why would a stomach tube be inserted into his lung? and whose baby?
Small Koi Fish 2 years ago (edited)
Accident. If not properly done by a professional, the tube can go down the wrong opening and cause serious damage/death. Edit: It was the husband's mother's child. The husband's brother. His baby brother died due to this and was never given a name.
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Julia H (Submission author) 2 years ago
By purchasing the headstone myself. Unfortunately I can't give him a name, I don't think
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#11
That my wife's uncle (my uncle-in-law?) basically decided that he was a Christian zealot one day when she was a pre-teen. He forbid his wife (previously the "cool" aunt) from associating with my wife's family because they were "impure," and took over the day to day life in his house with a heavy hand. He would ruin family gatherings by spouting off about how everyone else was going to hell, they were full of sin, they didn't live by the word of the Bible, etc. I recognize that people like my wife's uncle are NOT uncommon, but to just stop on dime and switch how everything in his life and his family's lives went seems quite surprising to me.
Final score:
14points
Lil Miss Hobbit 2 years ago
As a Christian, I have seen this happen too many times. Just stop. You are not helping anyone. You will only destroy your family and community and you will not honor God while doing it.
jolie laide 2 years ago
Decades ago, people would use the term "fundamentalist" for these kinds of zealots, which is essentially the same thing. "Fundie" was the nickname for them, and they absolutely could NOT be talked to, reasoned with, etc. This specific type of person usually sees a grand opportunity and seizes on it. Not because of their beliefs, though they usually tell themselves and others that, but because it elevates them into an authority figure or an even bigger one. Control issues, narcissism, manipulation, etc. People like this often cross the line between being religious and being a God unto their own, which is one hell of a red flag.
#12
My neighbor treats her dog like a baby. I mean in a highchair, with a baby spoon and bib. Her other dog once got in our backyard, so I went to inform her. She left the door open after I told her, and inside was the dog, in the high chair, with the bib. It was pretty weird.
Final score:
14points
Powerful Katrinka 2 years ago
Some dogs are physically incapable of eating in a horizontal position. It's not uncommon to seat them in a baby chair or something similar in order to feed them. https://researchblog.duke.edu/2022/11/17/why-do-some-dogs-need-high-chairs-and-how-can-genetics-help/
jolie laide 2 years ago
I just learned something new, thank you for the link!
Load More Replies... #13
My friend's a cannibal. Not really, but she's a twin and she was going to be a triplet, but she and her brother ate the last kid in the womb.
Final score:
14points
#14
I had started studying at the University (Franco was still alive). My aunt, who had been running a construction company since her husband's death, has already closed it. She sent to my house a desk that her husband had used. One drawer was locked and, of course, it was the one that caught my attention the most. I managed to access inside and found... A STAR pistol, from the Spanish civil war, with all its bullets (I took it apart). A friend of mine wanted us to shoot it in the field, but luckily, I refused. Some time later I told my mother who, very angry, went to return the pistol to my aunt's house. My uncle had it there as protection, since every Saturday they paid the workers (about 50 men) and a lot of money was handled.rp0t I had started studying at the University (Franco was still alive). My aunt, who had been running a construction company since her husband's death, has already closed it. She sent to my house a desk that her husband had used. One drawer was locked and, of course, it was the one that caught my attention the most. I managed to access inside and found... A STAR pistol, from the Spanish civil war, with all its bullets (I took it apart). A friend of mine wanted us to shoot it in the field, but luckily, I refused. Some time later I told my mother who, very angry, went to return the pistol to my aunt's house. My uncle had it there as protection, since every Saturday they paid the workers (about 50 men) and a lot of money was handled.
Final score:
11points
El Secretario (Submission author) 2 years ago
Sorry. Troubles with the translator and my little cat Soru (3 months old)
BookFanatic 2 years ago
Anyone else think we need a picture of little Soru? :)
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#15
I came across a newspaper clipping dated late 1800s in my mom's memory box. Turns out there's a murderer in my family. Not sure how we're connected, but the 60-year-old farm hand fell in love with the 16-year-old farmer's daughter...and unalived the parents and the daughter with a shotgun. Whew.
Final score:
11points
censorshipsucks 2 years ago
killed her as well? because she wasn't interested? male entitlement and violence. horrific.
#16
i learned this year that my grandma's brother is married to his cousin.
Final score:
8points
Hey! 2 years ago
My parents were first cousins. We don't come from Alabama. They went to 3-4 different states to get married. They finally went to Niagara Falls, first US side, then Canada. The priest on the Canadian side accepted my Dad's bribe, which explains why we are Canadians instead of Americans.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
My parents are first cousins too. Legal to marry in Australia
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crowspectre (he/they) 2 years ago
Unrelated to the post (which is incredibly concerning???) But can you convince me to get finch
freakingbee is going offline (Submission author) 2 years ago
dude you HAVE to get finch it has helped me so much like the best part about it is sending other people good vibes like to drink water or give them a hug or something and it always shocks me out of whatever bad feeling i have at the moment. taking care of your bird helps you take care of yourself plus you can be friends with ✨me✨ on there
Load More Replies... jolie laide 2 years ago
Ooh boy... how would... what IS that even? So your grandmothers brother would be your great uncle and HIS cousin would be... uuugh. Someone help me out here?
María Hermida 2 years ago
Why worry about titles? I think this is much better than the woman above who was forced to marry her rapist. At least this one is for love, and nobody was forced. It sounds strange, but we don't know the circumstances. After all, the kings/queens in Europe have been marrying their cousins and more or less distant relatives for ages, and nobody seems to care.
Load More Replies... #17
One of my friends is homophobic, and somehow he accepts me as gay. I don't exactly understand...
Final score:
8points
Lil Miss Hobbit 2 years ago
How do you know they are homophobic? Please do not downvote me for this, but you can accept and love someone without taking part in their lifestyle and/or while putting up boundaries because of religion/etc. Disagreement does not equal hate, it only equals the need for honest communication and respect.
bluegal (Submission author) 2 years ago
You've clarified something for me, so thanks! Also, my other friend told me that after the guy just told them. He's also said some questionable stuff about gay people, and after finding out he (might) have been homophobic, it made a lot more sense. Thank you for commenting about this, though.
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#18
i found out that my mom's father had an affair with my mom's husband's first wife before my mom met her husband.
Final score:
8points
jolie laide 2 years ago
I won't lie.. this broke my brain a little. Okay so, your grandfather had an affair with your Dad's ex, before your Dad and Mom met. Yes? Damn family secrets are crazy!
kitteh floof lover (Submission author) 2 years ago
correct, except that the affair was while my dad was still married to his first wife. it happened while my dad was in the navy, in wwII. crazy
Load More Replies... #19
Neighbour was running a prostitution shop. Just her and her daughter. Allegedly. Another place I lived I had a w*house down the street, a drug den next to that, a stripper lived in between. One guy was hauled off by thugs he owed money to and dumped in the veld (prairie). Another was threatened with beheading in the middle of the complex. Fun times.
Final score:
7points
censorshipsucks (Submission author) 2 years ago
PS this was in upper-income suburbs, not a slum!
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
Doesn't seem like there's a difference where you live, friend.
Load More Replies... jolie laide 2 years ago
My neighborhood (along with most) is divided by a main street, so on one side is NW and across the main is NE. Example, "Oak St NW" and "Oak St NE". The NE side of the streets were more upper-middle class while the NW was more low/middle class. Instead of any "red light districts" we had "red light houses". Once it got dark, the lights would go on in a street facing window. If the "red light" (either a red bulb or a really dark red lamp shade) was on the main floor, customers would find a selection. If it was in an upper story window, only 1 person would be accepting customers. The cops used to love cruising down those streets, blaring a siren/lights for a minute or two to spook people. It wasn't uncommon to see half naked men and women running across yards, crossing the street, etc. to try and scatter and hide thinking a raid was coming.
#20
My neighbour used to have a side hustle where he helped pick up what was left of road accident victims. Said he had to stop because of the nightmares. And feeling followed home.
Final score:
7points
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
"Hey Louie, make sure you tail that guy. He cleaned up 38% of Paulie off the street earlier."
#21
I learned that paternal great grandmother helped Bonnie and Clyde. She hid them from the authorities and bought them supplies.
Final score:
6points
#22
My mom had a baby that died between my brother and me. I later found out (23andMe) that I have a half-brother. Appears she had an affair and got pregnant. Had the baby and put it up for adoption but told family it had died. Eventually my parents divorced but my dad loved her until the day he died. I've been emailing my half-brother for some time now and hope to meet him one day. My older siblings don't really care. My mom was a bit of a hoe and I really have no respect for her anymore.
Final score:
5points
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
There's a difference between enjoying sex without settling down, and cheating on your partner.
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#23
Nothing too specific, but before I lived with her, I always thought my aunt was a very kind person (she still is) but now I see that she's also pretty arrogant and can be especially mean sometimes. I feel like she forgets I struggle with lots of communication-related thingies, and I mess things up.
Final score:
3points
#24
One day my mum and I were talking, and she happened to mention that my aunt and uncle used to be very publicly affectionate when they first started dating, and I said ' that was strange, considering...' I was going to continue with 'because my aunt is not demontrative' but didn't get that far because my mum gaped at me and said 'wait do you KNOW'. I explained and the subject was dropped, but I've been wondering ever since!!!
Final score:
3points
#25
I recently found out that one of my cousins is a horrible homophobe and a casteist. Worse part is, I found out about this after he tricked me into telling him that my best friend is queer. He ranted how they need therapy and badmouthed them. There were many things before this but this was the final straw. If I ever get a job and move out, I am going no contact. Then there is my another cousin who studies art. He is a very cool guy.
Final score:
3points
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
Beat some sense into your first cousin, discuss Van Gogh with the second. Simple.
#26
I thought my mom was the stereotypical nerdy girl in school. Imagine my surprise when I learned she and her friends broke into the MIT chem lab, stole chemicals that were highly reactive with water, and threw them in the river, and all while they were supposed to be at orientation.
Final score:
2points
What do you think ?
Kate Jones 2 years ago
I always knew my parents were conservatives. But I only recently found out she legit thinks the earth is flat. I mean....what do you do?
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
If you love her, you look past it. If you hate her, go no contact as soon as you can.
Load More Replies... Kate Jones 2 years ago
I always knew my parents were conservatives. But I only recently found out she legit thinks the earth is flat. I mean....what do you do?
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
If you love her, you look past it. If you hate her, go no contact as soon as you can.
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