If your reading put the word Dreams in your answer
if you are feeling generous and would like to help me get started in life: https://gofund.me/13240177
please and thank you!
This post may include affiliate links.
Here’s a joke that has never failed to make anyone laugh (yet)
A teacher takes a student aside and tells him that his English is horrible so she gave him an assignment which was to go home, write 5 sentences and tell them to the teacher the next day. The boy goes to his father first asking him to tell him a sentence. The father was in a very important call so he told the boy “Shut up you donkey!” He writes that down as his first sentence. He goes to his mother for his next sentence but she didn’t listen to his question and thought that he was asking to go out and play. She said, “No my dear, tomorrow” which the boy writes as his next sentence. He goes to his older brother who was watching cricket and was jumping up and down yelling “Sixer! Sixer!” He writes that down as his third sentence. He goes to his younger sister who was singing “Spider man, Spider man.” That becomes his fourth sentence. For the fifth one he went to his grandmother who was cleaning the toilet and she was singing, “Under the toilet, under the toilet.”
At school the next day
Teacher: Tell me your 5 sentences.
Boy: Shut up you donkey!
Teacher: Such disrespect. Should I slap you?
Boy: No my dear, tomorrow.
Teacher: *slaps the boy*
Boy: *starts jumping up and down* Sixer! Sixer!
The teacher takes the boy to the principal
Principal: Who are you?
Boy: Spiderman Spiderman
Principal: Where do you live?
Boy: 🎶 Under the toilet, under the toilet 🎶
The one I told a lot as a teenager (it is gross sorry):
A man was running a p**n shop and a customer came in and asked to buy a fork. Then another two people came in and also bought forks. Finally, a forth person came in and asked to buy a straw. The shop owner said "are you sure you don't want a fork?" Customer replied "no, someone threw up outside and all the chunky bits have gone".
Not really one I find that funny now, I wouldn't dream(s) of telling it to people in person these days.
