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By now, you’ve probably heard of the internet’s most beloved grandma, Myrna Tellingheusen, and her no-nonsense take on the world. Well, if you haven’t, we’ve already released quite a few pieces about her over the years right here, here, and here. But since she seems to have a treasure chest filled to the brim with hilarious pearls of wisdom, we just had to bring you the newest compilation of her tweets.

You see, the elderly church-going lady has been giving her devoted fans their daily dose of fun and cracking them up every day since 2015. With countless puns, absurdly funny witticisms, and spot-on insights, she gets fired up at judging the younger generation and poking fun at the stereotypes old folks face daily.

From humorously reminiscing about the good old days to offering her witty wisdom bites to anyone willing to listen, Myrna has been hailed and celebrated as the funniest grandma online, and she's nowhere near ready to give up her title. So continue scrolling to read some of the best quotes we collected from the account, upvote the ones that made you laugh, and be sure to share your thoughts with us in the comments!

#1

Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

PearlsFromMyrna Report

Caro Caro
Community Member
4 years ago

I'm going to steal this one :D

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    #2

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    K Wit
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This is very important for women right now in the US. Just know anything you do on your phone will be used against you after our rights are taken away. This isn't only about abortion. This is also about our right to privacy. We will no longer have that right. Missouri has already been tracking period apps of their constituents. States will be criminalizing birth control too so be careful where you call your prescriptions in from. Arizona is talking about criminalizing condoms even it's getting that insane.

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    #3

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I feel this.

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    The internet has an endless supply of information for virtually anything, and there are no questions about it. But sometimes, it can start to feel full of negativity. Just think about it, every time we open social media platforms like Twitter to casually scroll our worries away, we seem to be bombarded with bleak headlines, fiery political debates, and troubling amounts of fake news.

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    Social media should indeed be a free-speech space where ideas are discussed and publicly disputed, but we need to balance the scales with a dash of positivity to avoid constant doomscrolling. Luckily, there has been a positive shift over the last few years where Twitter has also become the perfect arena for many online comedians to share jokes to make our days a little brighter. Hilarious outlets like Myrna's where she just tells her followers about life has become a breath of fresh air when the gloom online seems overwhelming.

    #4

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Loty
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    We made a bad turn somewhere when we decided that everyone's opinion is equal. NO!!! Doctor's opinion on medical matters is a lot more valid than trucker's and trucker's opinion on long haul trucking is a lot more valuable than doctor's.

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    #5

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    LeighAnne Brown-Pedersen
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited)

    Every re-boot. Spider-Man, Superman, True Grit…

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    #6

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    MarmotArchivist
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    True, but the government makes it easier to vape than to vote.

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    Even though the God-fearing elderly lady behind all the life advice has been conquering Twitter from the handle @PearlsFromMyrna for quite some time now, no one quite knows whether Myrna Tellingheusen is a real person or a character dreamed up by some comedian.

    Myrna’s Twitter bio says she’s a "retired executive secretary for Mr. Stanley Bogenshoots, Senior Vice President at Hughes Aircraft. Living the good life in Southern California," and, most importantly, "Loves God." She also claims to live in Vaca Muerta Estates, a community which appears to be quite fake. So we thought it would be interesting to check who dear Myrna had deemed worthy to follow on the platform.

    It won’t be surprising to hear that dear nephew Lyle Tellingheusen was the first one on the list. His location is set to "Aunt Myrna’s mauve guestroom" and his Twitter bio reads: "Temporary part time parking valet. Full time Stay at Home Nephew." Another user that caught our attention was Clarence CJ Jackson, the Postal Carrier for Vaca Muerta Estates who is fairly active on the platform. Well, living in such an active and amusing neighborhood sure gives the mailman plenty of things to say.

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    #7

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Kona Pake
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Isn’t that the “Peter Principle?”

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    #8

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Use it with pride

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    #9

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    James016
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I have about 6 different parking apps for different parts of London and the surrounding areas. All of them were a pain to sign up to.

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    There are many more inhabitants in the Vaca Muerta Estates who interact with one another on Twitter to some extent. However, there’s no way of knowing whether everything shared by the Vaca Muerta Estates population is real, or if the person behind this persona has decided to create their own virtual world. While the truth remains a mystery, Myrna’s hilarious insights can still charm and bring some genuine laughs to nearly anyone.

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    Moreover, the ​​grey-haired grandma has collected a vast amount of fans simply by sharing her snarky, un-sugar-coated approach to life. Over 152K people enjoy reading her insightful wisdom bites on her neighbors, her church friends, her nephew Lyle, and other very serious topics.

    #10

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Sue Lynn Chan
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Do we have a delete button?

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    #11

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Savage!

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    #12

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    GoddessOfChaos
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Does anyone?…

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    #13

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    LeighAnne Brown-Pedersen
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited)

    And lack a dictionary

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    A few years back, Myrna told Bored Panda that she exists "in a modular home park in Rainbow, California, a sleepy little town just north of San Diego, and just south of Temecula."

    "My story is long and fascinating. However, the short version of this story is I want to make social media fun," she added. "There is too much acrimony in the world right now, and people need to better their sense of humor."

    The internet’s beloved retiree also revealed in a previous interview that after a rewarding career at Hughes Aircraft company, she decided to use her organizational skills at her retirement community of Vaca Muerta Estates and is a chair at the First Presbyterian Church, "where she also serves as a member of the Handbell Choir."

    #14

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Indy
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    One arm in the air, fist clutched in victory, screaming "whooooo!"

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    #15

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Oh I love this one !!!

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    Never miss a story that brings joy to the world. Add us on Google

    #16

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Legen ( wait for it ) dary
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Priorities are settled.

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    She revealed that she started her internet presence on Twitter when her nephew Lyle "downshifted The Twitter onto my computer to distract me from writing tersely worded letters to our newspaper's editor." As time went by, the grandma realized that she "no longer needs to be invited to dinner parties to rearrange people’s furniture."

    "I can still provide my sage, no-nonsense advice to people who are clamoring for a sense of decorum in a stressful world." But while the old lady has a huge audience following her every tweet, she still remains "true to myself in every sense of the word."

    #17

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    MarmotArchivist
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    No Myrna, don't be a Karen.

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    #18

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    MarmotArchivist
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I like his priorites.

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    #19

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Tuna Fish
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Y'all come on. This sh!t is funny. Don't be hating on a gramma meme.

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    When it comes to the inspiration and strength to come up with such charming and witty wisdom to share with every lost soul out there, it all comes from the Holy Bible. "You will find no greater book that gives purpose and meaning when life sometimes seems hopeless," she said.

    Myrna also considers herself a student of life, since "through careful observation from my binoculars, I gauge what’s happening around my neighborhood, whether its potholes in the Cheesecake Factory parking lot, Doris throwing beer cans on my yard, or Carol substituting Cool Whip for heavy cream with Cool Whip."

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    #20

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Geeki Nikki
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    That's OK Myrna you won't have one for much longer. 😉

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    #21

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    get the belt

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    #22

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Diya
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Lyle seems to have a great sense of humour.

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    The grandma is confident that she knows all the right answers to many of society’s problems, and she’d help everyone "if people would only heed my advice." Myrna told Bored Panda she wishes she could tweet thousands of times a day, but, unfortunately, "casseroles don't make themselves."

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    #23

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    A job is a job. Don't belittle people who work!

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    #24

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    PebbleBoy Gaming
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Kerfuffles do require a lot if energy

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    #25

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Kanzi
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Covid ain't done with us yet. 😔

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    #26

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    A.J Milne
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    ...what is that supposed to mean? I am worried

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    #27

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Susan Reid Smith
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Noooooo, not an outburst at a fabric store!

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    #28

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    imontape
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I am the dishwasher :/

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    #29

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited)

    It stands for "Grafics Interchange Format," so it's pronounced GIF, NOT JIF.

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    #30

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    DeadLetterOffice
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    How to dress like a lemon meringue pie: Six Looks.

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    #31

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    the most accurate from of measurement

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    #32

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    SoozeeQ
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Now this is a Myrna statement I can get behind.

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    #33

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    THANK YOU

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    #34

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Monica Martinez Castañeda
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    That's (another) thing I can´t understand, as a European, about the USA... It's never taken me more than 5 minutes to vote..!!!

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    #35

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    close enough

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    #36

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Supply problems. Since Cro magnon

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    #37

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Indy
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Our arms no longer have muscle tone. It was a work out to roll the window down. And satisfying to feel the wind after such an accomplishment

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    #38

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Legen ( wait for it ) dary
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Didn't help in 2020 either.

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    #39

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Evil Hornet
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I wouldn't mind if someone would show me cat photos when I'ma at work

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    #40

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Memere
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    It really doesn't take that many of those nasty things.

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    #41

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Cowws
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    ouch!

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    #42

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    A.J Milne
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    *Gasp* Helen that B***H

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    #43

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Loty
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Had to google walk-in bathtub and now I want one

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    #44

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Damn squirrels!

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    #45

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Beth S
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Don't forget water and baking soda!

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    #46

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Geeki Nikki
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I wear what I want.

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    #47

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Sue Lynn Chan
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    You are a true villain, ma’am 😈😈

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    #48

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    NsG
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Good for Fran

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    #49

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    *insert the write that down meme from SpongeBob here*

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    #50

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Trey Shipp
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Anyone else get too far in?

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    #51

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Francis
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    i've got bad news for you...

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    #52

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Hugh Willie Mungous
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    . . . with whom he is dealing . . . . . . . .

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    #53

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Display Name
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    She must've takin off em olives😏....BEVERLY!!!

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    #54

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    you'd be shocked

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    #55

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    #56

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    A.J Milne
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Same, but I am trying to walk away from myself cause I can't stand me.

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    #57

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Lyone Fein
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This election is rigged!

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    #58

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Esco
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    AKA The Met Gala.

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    #59

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    nooneimportant
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Are you my nana?

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    #60

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Yoga Kitty
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    She does not know my cats!

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    #61

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Locked In The Cellar
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    What's wrong with a Christmas dinosaur?

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    #62

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    But Grandma's mind is cracking up just fine

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    #63

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    add some cookies and you have a deal

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    #64

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Modesty is not one of your traits

    #65

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Norma
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Unfortunately, my W-X-Y-Z is missing!!

    #66

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    It wasn't Andy Williams

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    #67

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    And then smoke a joint

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    #68

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    those coinstar machines can be so inaccurate sometimes

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    #69

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Z Alexi
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    That wasn't even in style in Dec 2020 when Myrna wrote her preferences. Brooches are dust collectors. Guess it's supposed to be funny, old-people's tastes. Old people gave us the computer & cell phones, people.

    #70

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Khavrinen
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Burn!

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    #71

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    SoozeeQ
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    But it would make for an interesting Nativity display!

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    #72

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Trey Shipp
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    LMAOOO

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    #73

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Kate Jones
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Mr. Rogers taught us this.

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    #74

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Mark LaHoud
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Everyone who argues over Miracle Whip is a Miracle Whip fan.

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    #75

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Kay blue
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Too right, no one younger than you should be calling you "young ladies" is so condescending.

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    #76

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Memere
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I don't have any of those. Towels are meant to be used.

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    #77

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Display Name
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    U and me bothgirl

    #78

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I think she meant wine instead of pudding

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    #79

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    #80

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Gayathri E
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Myrna!! Say yes..

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    #81

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    competition for the parking is real

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    #82

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    What do you call the thing that holds the mophead to the handle?

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    #83

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Caro Caro
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    That's not true.

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    #84

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    If the shoe fits...

    #85

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    moose man
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    whats the hex

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    #86

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    best turtle
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    aw man now i want a patty melt

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    #87

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    You are a pineapple chunk suspended in jello

    #88

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Karen on line three

    #89

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Memere
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I like to clean while fretting - it helps me get over it sooner.

    #90

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    SoozeeQ
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Happy Friyay! ;oP

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    #91

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    SoozeeQ
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Sheesh! Look at the time on the tweet. Give it up, already, Myrna.

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    #92

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Display Name
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Lol

    #93

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    #94

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Sue Lynn Chan
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited)

    I’m sorry Myrna,……….but Mac and cheese IS a thanksgiving dish

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    #95

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Do you also keep plastic on your furniture?

    #96

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    And after that, a woman's right to abortion

    #97

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    SoozeeQ
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    What about Potatoes Anna or Potatoes Dauphine? Why is this an issue, anyway?

    #98

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    But not if they also have Jello recipes

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    #99

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Russ Kincade
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    Unless you are ... Florida Man! Then it is expected.

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    #100

    Grandma-Tweets-Myrna-Tellingheusen

    PearlsFromMyrna Report

    Steve Fischer
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    I can understand when it's just you talking to yourself

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