65 Funny Vegetarian Tweets For Those Who Are Tired Of Explaining Their Diet For The 100th Time

Excellent!

Hippos are omnivores. They're not predators, they don't hunt, but if a lion p*sses them off, they'll k*ll it and yay, free food! And they don't hate you, they don't give an eff about you... unless you enter their territory and you become an annoying little mosquito they're gonna crush. That's the beautiful thing.

"Lizzie, you can bring paper plates".

Lee Gilliland

Lee Gilliland

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Let me guess, they don't know pulses and legumes have protein.

Only 6?

just don't tell anybody. Nobody knows what car I like best.

YES!!! While it is true that there are really annoying, preachy vegeterians and vegans, it is also true that some meat eaters seem to feel offended simply by someone not eating meat and keep making derogatory remarks completely unprovoked.

explains why most "vegetarians" I know are roly-poly little carb balls!

Dr House: 'It' lupus'

Yeah, what even is the problem? I haven't eaten meat since Helmut Kohl was in charge. I have not experienced any withdrawal symptoms as of yet. Should I still wait for that to happen?

"It's a veggiesaurus Lex! Veggiesaurus!"

No, it's a tofu.

McDonald's fries are not vegetarian...

That's a baa-d joke.

Ben and Jerry’s does a really good nondairy ice cream made with almond milk. In a few different flavours. So good!

Send them to India

Well yeah give it to someone else who is eating meat

Go crazy with cheese mixed in the potato 😋

Gorillas do eat meat, just not a lot of it.

Ace

Ace

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But would you?

Put cheese on it.

And even the salad will often have bacon or chicken strips in it.

Protein is found in many foods that aren't meat

I see pickles, cheese & onion on there as well.

They never heard of a vegetarian pizza? Mushrooms, onions, green pepper, olives, tomatoes, zucchinis?

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Nothing will happen if they didn't. Nothing will change.

YES!

Gingivitis. Or scurvy.

If chicken isn't a meat, what is it?

Bring your own food you know is veggie. It's a potluck.

In what way?

I stopped eating meat for two reasons. One is based on the inhumane treatment of animals and the other is taste. I was never someone who loved steak or pork. It was a no brainer and a choice.

Didn't ask and don't care

LakotaWolf (she/her)

LakotaWolf (she/her)

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Not a vegetarian, but good gosh do I love cauliflower XD I prefer it raw and plain, because I am a weirdo. When I was a kid, my mom always would have a plate of either raw broccoli, raw cauliflower, or raw carrots cut up in the fridge, and we kids were allowed to eat as much as we wanted as a snack, anytime we wanted. So I grew up with plain raw veggies being the norm as a snack/side dish and I'm still very fond of them to this day! Also love raw Brussels sprouts and raw bell pepper, because I am insane XD

IT might have something to do with the 20 cups of vegetarian coffee they consumed.

If you use that logic than we should be eating d**d people like Soylent Green. If you wouldn't want your child or family pet to be bred just to t*****e and k**l for food, then you shouldn't treat animals that way either.

Sometimes I go to the grocery store to watch all these heroic hunters hunting their packaged meat. Magnificient.

Wait, you're supposed to be vegetarian for that?

I've ordered that exact same thing many times before because I really like the veggie patties. It's good that the waiter asked.

Some eat fish though? Pescetarianism.

Nacho cheese-the cheese that does not belong to you

They must either be stupid or cynical? (The aji.als not feeling pain). But plants react to wounding and pain,though,that is also science but if they feel pain is something else?? And any theist reasoning is just so a*****e on animals..

I eat meat, non-meat stuff as well, also loves animals. Wanting them treated well and be able to do their natural behaviours, then an quick painless end. Trying to support wild birds and insects in different ways.

Are you allergic to meat? Or will not eating it bring the animal back to life?

I love bacon. I love grilled cheese. The thought of defiling either by combining them shivers my spine.

They're AHs, maybe?

Enjoy your turkey, get a different girlfriend

When the diner has left they'll take the lettuce back to the kitchen and cut some of it off and use it in salads and sandwiches.

Happened to a vegetarian friend of my sister at a restaurant. The guy just asked to please remove the meat (chicken strips or something like that) from a specific salad. He got his salad and enjoyed it until he found two strips of bacon at the bottom of the plate. This was not an accident, the kitchen staff were just ássholes. He only got his order comped because the rest of the friend group kept making a huge stink about it. Still, that's food tampering.

I cooked bacon last week for the first time in about a decade and the whole house just reeked. I opened every window, used every fan and heated vinegar then lavender in the microwave. It still smells.

Volunteered twice for the Las Olas Food and Wine Festival. After your shift ends, you can try the food samples. All of the options include meat. Don't volunteer anymore since it isn't inclusive

That's your subconscious saying what you won't admit - you want to eat meat.

I eat meat and live in denial and now you are making me question my choices. So keep that to yourself. That's a you problem

sounds more like a You problem than a vegetarian problem

If your iron levels are THAT low, your diet is bad, no matter whether it has meat in it or not. It takes a lot more careful planning and knowledge about nutrition to not malnourish yourself with any sort of restrictive diet. Taking care that you get all you need is YOUR responsibility. So this is really a self-own instead of a joke at the uninformed guy's expense.

Why do you walk past the meat section? To gawk at the cuts of meat like you're a bystander at a fatal accident?

Yes I can.