Most of us know how incredibly important it is to live next to people who we like (or at least tolerate). When you get along with your neighbors, things are great. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true! A truly bad neighbor—likely from the 5th circle of hell—can make you miserable. And you should see how poorly they communicate…
Our team here at Bored Panda has curated a list of images showing what kinds of messages and notes some awful neighbors have actually sent. Some of them are relatable, and others might make you laugh through tears. Scroll down to see how nonsensical and frustrating things can get.
Bored Panda got in touch with social psychologist Alison Jane Martingano, Ph.D., for a chat about how people can connect with the people in their neighborhood, as well as how to have empathy for problematic neighbors. Martingano is an assistant professor at the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, the host of the 'Psychology and Stuff' podcast, and runs the 'What Do You Mean?' blog on Psychology Today. You'll find our full interview with her below.
This post may include affiliate links.
These Are Some Nice Neighbors
Hey Look At You
You've Got Mail
According to Social Psychologist Martingano from the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, most adults are “missing out” on the benefits of talking to people they don’t (yet!) know. "People miss out on these benefits for three main reasons: lack of intention (underestimating the joy of these conversations for themselves and others), lack of competence (not knowing how to hold these conversations), and lack of opportunity," she explained to Bored Panda in an email.
The host of the ‘What Do You Mean?’ blog said that people need to overcome these barriers in order to promote conversations with their neighbors. “First, individuals may not want to talk to strangers, or [they] believe strangers do not want to talk to them. People have a good sense that a conversation with a friend will be enjoyable, but with strangers, we are anxious and more likely to assume it will go badly."
There is, however, a very positive caveat! "Research shows that people enjoy conversations with strangers more than they expect!" Martingano shared with us.
At Least They All Took The Time To Discuss It And Write A Note vs. Telling Them Immediately
My Friend Came Home To Find This Note On His Door
Meet The Parents
"We also underestimate the other person's interest in conversing. Looking for things like positive body language, eye contact, and smiling can provide clues that they might want to chat," she said.
"Second, people may feel they don't have competent interpersonal skills to break the ice and start a conversation with a neighbor. We worry about being likable and appearing competent but don’t know how to create these impressions. Generally, asking questions and sharing something a bit personal can create a positive impression."
She continued: "Third, folks may simply not see the opportunities in their everyday lives to speak to someone new. We often don’t think of bumping into our neighbor in the hall as an opportunity. If we go a little slower, we may see that there are more opportunities than we think."
The Ending To This Note On The Little Library In My Neighborhood Definitely Takes A Turn
A book stealer. That's going to get more than a mean glare. At least a tut tut as well!! tut-tut-tu...fb399f.jpg 
Probably Not The Response She Was Hoping For
Bored Panda was interested in finding out how people can have more empathy for their neighbors who are known to cause them trouble. After all, at least some friction and misunderstandings are inevitable between people who live in close proximity to one another.
"To foster empathy in these situations, it's crucial to practice perspective-taking. This involves actively trying to understand the experiences, motivations, and feelings of our neighbors, especially in challenging circumstances. As I often discuss in my talks, empathy is like a muscle that requires regular exercise," Martingano said.
However, she warned that people can overwork their empathy 'muscle' or they can try to 'pick up' a weight that's too heavy for them at the moment. "In cases of friction with neighbors, you don’t want to start trying to practice empathy by discussing their opposing political views. Begin with smaller exercises. For example, ask them what they think about the new garbage collection system or school bus route. Areas of minor disagreement can be a great place to start practicing seeing things from someone else's point of view before picking up the larger dumbbells," the expert suggested.
Directionally Challenged
Don’t suppose you could appologise first? Edit; BLOODY HELL ty for so many UPVOTES-
Joy-Hating Neighbor Writes Psychotic Threatening Note
Small child running freely and laughing and giggling!!!! Oh the horror !!
I'm not sure how this would end if officials would be involved. There have been lawsuits in Germany where children got banned from playing outside because they were "too loud". In one case they were not longer allowed to use a soccer field because the ball made to much noise when it hit the wall or the fences...
Load More Replies...
I once went to a major-league baseball game, and the lady (on a cell phone) behind us kept screaming at my son to calm down, be quiet and sit. The ushers saw I was getting kinda ugly at her for treating my son like that, so they simply moved us up to the front. "Lady, it's a freaking baseball game! He's SUPPOSED to stand up and cheer!"
Why are the writer's pets looking into the child's yard?
They're looking to escape and want a fun place to live.
Load More Replies...
I'd tell them to go ahead and call the police, I'll wait. Then I would bake myself a batch of cookies, and enjoy them while listening to the psycho neighbor complain. Even better, when the police tell her that no laws are being broken, and not to waste their time on frivolous complaints. (I'll be sure to pack up some cookies for the officers to enjoy later!)
BP would sensor the response I would give to my neighbor.
I believe it would be like mine, ending with "and the horse you rode in on!".
Load More Replies...
Those poor traumatised dogs! And the bird will probably need intense therapy.!
Sounds like the HOA Queen is about to learn how much the police don't care.
I'd love to hear the police response to that call! "So there's a child running around laughing in their own yard? Yes of course we'll send the SWAT team right away." What a nasty b!tch.
I'm sure that little to none of the posts here are real tbh
Load More Replies...
At least she didn't start the note with, "Some people in the neighborhood and I have been talking..."
Take this note to the police, identify the neighbor, and say you fear for your child's safety given the obvious animosity.
OH NO! Not a child enjoying simple pleasures! Won't someone think of the neighbors!
Go ahead, call the police so they can fine YOU for looking in your neighbours yard, which is a violence of privacy!
It's definitely not the child's behaviour that's the problem here...
I'd be putting a trampoline and a basketball net in just to spite them. And maybe a pool for summer. (Though some areas have those weird HOA so depends on that I suppose).
Time to put a jungle gym, slip n' slide, and a sandbox in the backyard.
By the way, STOP: Yawning, sneezing, whispering, coughing, walking, talking, or living or I'll call the FBI.
I'll move the stereo next to the window and play some rock music on full volume to drown out my child's voice, but obviously the music will continue until 2-3am. Would that be better for you, the dogs and the bird?
Do not believe. Someone wrote this themselves so they could be dramatic.
I think I’d give my kids as many noisemaker toys as I could that don’t completely disturb the peace (think kazoos not air horns) and literally insist they call the cops and let the chips fall where they may. This coming from someone who had to call the cops twice in two hours because my neighbors think it’s ok to blast their music to the point it feels like I’m living next door to a live concert. They even received a written warning from our park management for doing the very same thing the day before. I’m trying to recover from a hospital stay all why preparing for another hospital visit. Blaring music so loud I can’t hear my TV. THAT’S a legitimate disturbing the peace complaint. Not when the kid comes outside bouncing his basketball and laughing.
Downvote stalker, your lack of intelligence is showing
Load More Replies...
Can I have these people with the small child as neighbors? I have dogs and horses and both would love seeing a small child running around.
Call the police and say what exactly? Kid is playing in their own yard? So silly.
i remember seeing something similar but the child was autistic, i dont know if this is the same letter though
I had a neighbour exactly like this. She received severe punishment. She knew where it came from but couldnt prove it. Eventually she had to can her home business because it was targeted in my vengeance spree.
Oh, this would have me plotting and planning all sorts of dastardly things to get back at this arrogant, selfish piece of sh!t. Parent should buy the kid a horn and drums and set them up outside to practice.
Congratulations... you just inspired me to open a free daycare for single mothers.
Oh...My...GOD! If I was the person on the receiving end of this....
This is where I would put together a "fun fair". When I was a kid, people used to make small carnivals with games to raise money for one of the big charities of the time. Kids galore! Squeeling, laughing, throwing up after too many hot dogs and too much candy. It was always a blast - should maybe be resurrected. On a weekly basis.
She should reply with: Well I can't keep them chained up all year, because they know if they don't pretend to be happy, I will beat them more....
Dear "K******d, twat-fu*k-Cu!t Face" Please understand that any well-treated dog would not feel threatened by a happy child playing in the garden!!!
UGH. Sadly, i get it. I love having my windows open but shrieking children are annoying. I wouldn't ever write a note to my neighbors with the banshees, however, because its a losing battle. Yes, i know im a curmudgeon.
Time to increase outdoor time. And I grew up with birds, they love watching people
When my siblings and I were youngsters, we had a neighbor woman that we called "the witch nextdoor." She was constantly watching us to make sure we didn't get too close to their yard. Her husband was no better. One time we noticed her sitting with her back to the nearest window. She was pretending to read the newspaper - but inside the open newspaper she was holding a mirror so she could still see everything we were doing, which was just playing outside as kids do. Apparently she thought herself to be clever with her monitoring our play. One time she thought we got too close (always in our own yard) and she came outside and yelled to us that we had to stay five feet away from her yard at all times. My sister, the oldest of the six of us, had the presence of mind to reply, "Oh, we'll remember THAT! FIVE FEET. FIVE FEET!" We and my parents had plenty of laughs over that episode. As if she had the right to order us around in our own yard! 🙄🤣
A couple of years later, my dad saved Mr Neighbor's life. He was standing on his front porch, watching us while eating M&Ms, tossing them in the air and catching them in his mouth. He started choking on one and my dad saw him and raced over there to give him the Heimlich maneuver to dislodge the M&M.
Load More Replies... 
“I take a walk outside I'm surrounded by Some kids at play I can feel their laughter So why do I sear?” —“Black” Pearl Jam
How dare children be outside in the fresh air! They should be on their xbox's starting wars and playing a game of people playing football. How dare they play real football!
This reminds me of the neighbour I had as a kid. She would constantly complain about kids playing and laughing. I threw a ball over her fence once, it came back with writing that said “if we see this ball again, we’re keeping it”. She’s probably dead by now, people like this are the worst.
this HAS to be fake. I mean, I know a-hole neighbors who can't stand seeing kids have fun are a thing, but this just feels kinda too much. But at this point, with some of the sheit I've seen, I also wouldn't be surprised if it's real.
Things You Can't Borrow: Children, Decency, Respect
The interesting thing is that you can ‘exercise’ your empathy, even without any real people. “We can practice empathy while reading by trying to understand the feelings and motivations of fictional characters. Movies, theater, and even visual arts like the enigmatic Mona Lisa can serve as tools to enhance empathy. Think of these experiences as your empathy gym, a place where you can exercise your empathy muscles in a fictional environment, without the risk of offending anyone," Martingano told Bored Panda via email.
"Then, when you find yourself in a challenging exchange, where it's harder to discern feelings or perspectives of your neighbors, your empathy muscles will be stronger, thanks to these smaller, manageable practices."
A Note In The Elevator In Los Angeles For The Downstairs Neighbor
When Life Doesn't Give You Lemons, Make Stolen Lemonade
In an ideal world, we’d all know and like our neighbors. We’d also all probably live in such a way that there’s a good balance between privacy and being social when we want it. And we’d all be able to solve any issues that crop up because we’d be proficient in diplomacy, clear communication, active listening, and looking for compromises.
We don’t know whether you’ve noticed it or not, but we certainly do not live in an ideal world. Tension and friction can and do lead to arguments between neighbors over everything and anything: noise, rudeness, annoying behaviors, bad habits, zoning issues, etc. Far from everyone’s capable of overcoming these neighborly challenges and miscommunication with grace and calmness. The reality is that fewer people know their neighbors now than decades ago.
Nor is everyone self-aware enough to admit that they might, in fact, be causing problems for someone else. Many people have an ego. When you bring up a problem with their behavior, they can get defensive or aggressive. Some people are so touchy that they even see friendly requests about not playing the music so bloody loud at night as a personal affront. How dare anyone not like their massive midnight parties on a work night?!
Note That Got Left On My Neighbor's Car After He Parked Crooked And Hit The Car Next To Him
Passive-Aggressive Note
Passive Aggression Level Up
The first step to overcoming any issue with your neighbors is talking to them about the issue itself. You can leave them a friendly little note, send them a message (if you have their number or you’re connected on social media!), or chat with them the next time you see them outside. However, if it’s a more pressing problem that’s literally impacting your day-to-day life, consider walking up to their front door and asking them if you can talk for a couple of minutes.
We all enjoy seeing justice being done. Naturally, when we confront someone who’s done us wrong, we imagine all sorts of scenarios where we come out on top and our neighbors are remorseful for their God-awful behavior. But reality is often very different from our power fantasies. The fact is that if you start off the conversation angry, judgmental, and confrontational, you’re only making things worse.
It’s usually best to be as cool and collected as possible. Start your conversation with your neighbor in a friendly or neutral manner. Explain the situation to them. Tell them how their behavior impacts you and how it makes you feel. You should try to avoid outright blaming them for things, even if they are 100% in the wrong. Remember, your goal is to get them to stop their current behavior and become more neighborly. If they start resenting you, they might make your life hell just because they can get a rise out of you.
You’re Gonna Need Chlorine For Your Eyes And Your Hot Tub
There Is A Dumpster That Is Illegally Taking Up A Parking Spot On My Street With A Note Saying Not To Use It
I’d been leaving other notes making fun of their note. Today, someone else joined in.
Can't Really Argue With A Chill Bunny
Many people are perfectly reasonable. They’re willing to come to a compromise with you when they realize they’re in the wrong. But it’s essential that you take the time to actively listen to their perspective, too. Show them that you’re understanding and reasonable (so long as they’ll be the same…).
Take the time to connect with your problem neighbors… at least on a superficial level. It’s more difficult to do nasty things to people we personally know and like. Finding or creating some common ground between all of you can help you solve any future problems much more easily. And you never know, you might genuinely end up becoming cordial in the future.
Mailbox Damaged - Found This Note
But What I Do Have Are A Very Particular Set Of Skills, Skills I Have Acquired Over A Very Long Career, Skills That Make Me A Nightmare For People Like You
I really hope they got their stuff back! Don't eff around with people's coffee & AC
Love And Parking
Some of us have had experiences where problematic people eventually become our friends. But you won’t get there by accident. You need to put in the effort to get to know them. That might mean taking a few minutes to talk to them in the hallway or driveway. Or it may mean that you’ll be putting in the energy to get to know them at your local events. Consider inviting them to a barbeque or neighborhood party if you’re throwing one, too.
However, let’s not be naive. Not everyone is rational. Not everyone is reasonable. Not everyone is willing to set aside their ego and admit that they’re the jerk in a particular situation. Self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and humility take concerted effort over a long time to develop. So if your friendly chat (or two, or three!) doesn’t get through to your neighbor, it’s time to escalate things. Talk to your local council, building administrator, or neighborhood association about the problem. Ask them to mediate the conflict.
The Lady And The Tramp
If You Want The Snacks, You’ll Get The Vax
Back when Catholics couldn't eat meat on Fridays, a protestant moved into a Catholic neighborhood. Every Friday night, he'd grill a steak. After awhile, this really got to his neighbors, and they talked him into converting. At his baptism, the priest sprinkled Holy Water on his head, and said, "You were born a Protestant, you were raised a Protestant, and now you're a Catholic." Next Friday, the guy's out grilling his steak. The neighbors come over to tell him that's not allowed. The get there just in time to see the man sprinkle water on the steak and say, "You were born a steer, you were raised a steer, and now you're a fish."
If the local organizations and administrators can’t seem to get anything done, you might need to get in touch with your local law enforcement. In these situations, it helps if you have some evidence to back your claims up. You don’t want everything to devolve into a “we said/they said” sort of deal where your neighbors will go back to their old habits the moment the officers leave. In the worst-case scenarios, you will want to talk to your lawyer about taking your neighbors to court if they are actively harming you and damaging your property.
What Is Wrong With People? Open Your Own Mail
My Friend Got This Concerned Note Through Her Letterbox This Morning
I'm sorry but I cannot get over what gorgeous handwriting this person has!
Time To Unleash Some Kung Pau Vengeance
What's the strangest message or note you've ever gotten from a neighbor? Have you ever had to deal with problematic neighbors yourselves, Pandas? Feel free to share your experiences in the comments. In the meantime, for some more troublesome neighbor stories, check out Bored Panda's previous posts.
A Friend Of Mine Has Received This Note From The Guy Next Door
Neighbor Had A Note On Their Door, I Had A Follow-Up Note
The first note says: "Hey I'm glad y'all are having s*x but if you could tone it down some and scoot your bedframe away from the wall I would appreciate it.
Thanks, your neighbor"
An Invitation
Please Rank In Order
Friend's Neighbors Have Been Keeping Her Up At Night, So She Decided To Leave Them A Note
When Your Pet Is Also A Looney Tunes Character
Note From A Neighbor And My Response - Is It Okay?
For the record, I was not playing music and I am alone (as usual) tonight. So I do think she had the wrong apartment. I don't know, not sure what to do.
I was living in the top floor of an apartment building. And one night I hear the sounds of loud fighting. Due to some weird acoustics in the building, it sounded like it came from above me. I was the top floor, there was no such thing as above me. The lady who lived below me heard it as well, but she had called the cops. Who promptly showed up on my doorstep thinking it was coming from my apartment. I didn't let them in because I was embarrassed I hadn't cleaned. Later learned the cops had reported to the neighbor they thought it was suspicious I didn't let them in, and were convinced it was me. I lived alone. No one was ever in there but me. It was all very weird.
My Landlord Texted Me This After He Kicked My Sweet Elderly Neighbor Out Of Our Duplex So He Could Move In
So I Got This Note On My Car, The Second Picture Is My Daily Parking Situation
Asking Someone In 2021 If They Know Covid Like It’s The Muffin Man
I mean, seriously though... if covid was in full swing, construction and all sorts of other sh!t was put in hold just like everything else in life was... get over it. We all suffered a little.
Note Left On Car Of Disabled Neighbor's Social Worker
Use a few more poorly drawn exclamation points!!!!!! I don't think they understand your tone well enough!!!
Snake In The Grass
I have no freaking clue what those blacked out words say. Stupid censor!
Where’s Jason Voorhees When You Need Him?
A Neighbor Continues To Park In Front Of My House, Even After Leaving Them Several Polite Notes. This Is My Latest Reaction
The Same Cranked Out Neighbor Who Left Us A Note Last Year About Our Other Dog Barking Left Us One Today
Keep in mind he lives in a shed in his mom's backyard like ten feet away from my fence. He's also the same guy who blows through the stop sign and flies around the neighborhood like he owns it. Man, I hate tweakers.
My Neighbor Is A Charmer
What a gem! Really concerned about their precious phone number. Should have replied their dog barked it out in Morse code- a cry for help.
A Merry Christmas From Your Friendly Neighbor
Yeah, sure. Used only once, but really, REALLY badly by Stevie Wonder, Leona Helmsley, and the Hulk (when he wasn’t in a good mood).
Because It’s Too Much Work To Just Look Down
So It Rained Yesterday And I Got This Friendly Note Blaming My Dog For The Rain. Hung With A Command Strip With The Pull Tab Cut-Off
Does your dog p**s straight on to tiles? Because yeh, it will be dripping down on to them in that case. Get a little patch of grass in a tray or something or you're the AH
Neighbors
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
You May Also Like
Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk
Do you think childless individuals should be expected to chip in for group babysitting costs during friend gatherings?
17 Y.O. Is Done Sharing Her Birthday With Her Late Twin, Parents Are Not Having It
Do you think the girl should be allowed to celebrate her birthday without the remembrance of her deceased twin?
I don’t understand why people are freaking out over other people parking on a public street and in front of a house that isn’t theirs.
It really pisses me off that at least 3/4 of the posts/pics here aren't real...
Right? They are obviously fabricated
Load More Replies...
Really though? I mean I didnt look at the Reddit originals so I can't tell, they seem legit to me
Load More Replies...
While some of these maybe fake, we all cant deny that at some point we have come across bad neighbours.
Neighbours are frequently crazy so I find these 100% believable. Here's my list from 2000 to the present day: 2000-2004: drug dealer and hooker (two different neighbours). 2006: young couple that fought every night. 2006-2008: unemployed and expected me to paint their house when I wanted to move out of the area. 2011: landlord who blamed us when his flat flooded in a rain storm due to a f*****g hole in the wall for the TV cable, and wanted us to replace his stuff. (He was on the property so a neighbour). 2014-2022: old bag who insulted my kids and wouldn't let them play outside without verbal abuse including cussing. 2022: loud sex sounds including banging bed. 2023-present: loud music every day plus building site activities.
I actually had something to enter on this article. Saw it too late. --- While selling my house, I spoke to the HOA treasurer - nice older lady, big on "being neighborly". After the sale completed I received a note from her. I still have a picture of it. Paraphrasing "I stopped by the property at (address) yesterday. No one answered my knock, but the door wasn't locked, so I left a zucchini bread on the couch. I hope they don't have pets.". I immediately sent it to my realtor and begged him to let the new owners know "It Wasn't Me!".
People really need to stop complaining that weather happens. It's so freaking dumb and annoying.
People need to stop complaining about stupid things like weather. It's annoying.
I got about halfway through before the blatant fakeness overcame me.
I don’t understand why people are freaking out over other people parking on a public street and in front of a house that isn’t theirs.
It really pisses me off that at least 3/4 of the posts/pics here aren't real...
Right? They are obviously fabricated
Load More Replies... Really though? I mean I didnt look at the Reddit originals so I can't tell, they seem legit to me
Load More Replies... While some of these maybe fake, we all cant deny that at some point we have come across bad neighbours.
Neighbours are frequently crazy so I find these 100% believable. Here's my list from 2000 to the present day: 2000-2004: drug dealer and hooker (two different neighbours). 2006: young couple that fought every night. 2006-2008: unemployed and expected me to paint their house when I wanted to move out of the area. 2011: landlord who blamed us when his flat flooded in a rain storm due to a f*****g hole in the wall for the TV cable, and wanted us to replace his stuff. (He was on the property so a neighbour). 2014-2022: old bag who insulted my kids and wouldn't let them play outside without verbal abuse including cussing. 2022: loud sex sounds including banging bed. 2023-present: loud music every day plus building site activities.
I actually had something to enter on this article. Saw it too late. --- While selling my house, I spoke to the HOA treasurer - nice older lady, big on "being neighborly". After the sale completed I received a note from her. I still have a picture of it. Paraphrasing "I stopped by the property at (address) yesterday. No one answered my knock, but the door wasn't locked, so I left a zucchini bread on the couch. I hope they don't have pets.". I immediately sent it to my realtor and begged him to let the new owners know "It Wasn't Me!".
People really need to stop complaining that weather happens. It's so freaking dumb and annoying.
People need to stop complaining about stupid things like weather. It's annoying.
I got about halfway through before the blatant fakeness overcame me.
