When talking about comfort TV shows that never go out of style, you just can’t miss one of the best sitcoms of all time—Friends. And what part of the show can best describe its quality? Dialogues and monologues. While it’s full of iconic lines, there are quite a few Friends TV show quotes that take the cake.
The characters pool together a good number of different experiences throughout their adventures, which makes their sayings relatable to most of the viewers. And what’s best is that with the show’s timelessness and countless reruns, it will never go out of style.
This list contains the best quotes from the TV show Friends, which should bring you back to the time when there was no better relaxing activity after work than just sitting down, listening to the show’s specific humor, and enjoying a few episodes.
With popcorn and a chilling drink ready, take a deep dive into these Friends show quotes. Let us know which are your favorites, and if this list makes you want to rewatch the show yet again, hey, we’re not judging!
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"Oh, I'm sorry. Did my back hurt your knife?" — Rachel
"I wish I could, but I don’t want to." — Phoebe
"I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?" — Chandler
"Oh my God. I’ve become my father. I’ve been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn’t see this coming." — Rachel
"You don’t own a TV? What’s all your furniture pointed at?" — Joey
🤣 🤣 🤣. At this point I'm spoiling all the good jokes for myself cause I still haven't seen the show
Rachel: "Go tell him he's cute. What's the worst that could happen?"
Monica: "He could hear me."
Joey: "If he doesn’t like you, this is all a moo point."
Rachel: "A moo point?"
Joey: "Yeah. It’s like a cow’s opinion. It just doesn’t matter. It’s moo."
"Joey doesn’t share food!" — Joey
Ross: "No, Homo habilis was erect. Australopithecus was never fully erect."
Chandler: "Well, maybe he was nervous."
"I’m a pacifist. But when the revolution comes, I’ll destroy all of you." — Phoebe
"Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat, smelly cat, it’s not your fault." — Phoebe
"Fine! Judge all you want, but: married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, LIVE IN A BOX!" — Monica
"How you doin'?" — Joey
"Come on, Ross, you’re a paleontologist. Dig a little deeper." — Phoebe
Ross: "I went to that tanning place your wife suggested."
Chandler: "Was that place the Sun?"
never under estimate a person who calls his sister someone's wife....lesson learned😬
Joey: "Hey, Ross, I got a science question: If the Homo sapiens were, in fact, HOMO sapiens... is that why they're extinct?"
Ross: "Joey, Homo sapiens are PEOPLE."
Joey: "Hey, I'm not judging!"
I totally support the LGBTQ+ community, but you have to admit that this is a little funny.
"Welcome to the real world. It sucks. You're gonna love it." — Monica
"Until I was 25, I thought the response to 'I love you' was 'Oh, crap.'" — Chandler
"I say more dumb things before 9 a.m. than most people say all day." — Chandler
Rachel: "I’m not someone who goes after a guy five minutes after he’s divorced."
Monica: "No, you go after them five minutes before they get married."
Monica: "Do you have a plan?"
Phoebe: "I don't even have a 'pla.'"
Monica: "You can't live off your parents your whole life."
Rachel: "I know that, that's why I was getting married."
"Didn’t you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off, you know, like when you were running toward the swings or running away from Satan?" — Phoebe
"You love divorce so much, you’re probably gonna marry it — and then it won’t work out, so you’re gonna have to divorce it." — Phoebe
"I hope it's still funny when you're in hell." — Rachel
That's really similar to what I say when my Grandma makes a homophobic joke. The funny part is, she's Catholic, so it's really insulting to her and her little huffs of being offended is funny.
"I KNOW!" — Monica
Anyone else started saying this just like Monica after watching the show or is it just me?
"Oh. My. God." — Janice
"Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?" — Rachel
"Ross! We broke up two years ago. You’ve been married since then. I think it’s okay that we see other people." — Rachel
"Oh, are you setting Ross up with someone? Does she have a wedding dress?" — Rachel
"You-you-you... You threw my sandwich away... My sandwich? MY SANDWICH?!!" — Ross
A person who steals food deserves to be yelled at. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just... Yelled at.
"What’s not to like? Custard: good. Jam: good. Meat: good!" — Joey
"Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!" — Monica
As a girl who had to learn how to fake moan and pretend to enjoy their half-assed "bedroom skills" for the sake of my past exes' fragile egos, this one hits hard.
"I thought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters is that you make me happier than I ever thought I could be, and if you let me I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way." — Chandler
"And I have to live with a boy!" — Monica
"Now, I need you to be careful and efficient. And remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you're doing it wrong." — Monica
"We were on a break!" — Ross
"I grew up with Monica. If you didn't eat fast, you didn't eat." — Ross
"Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?" — Monica
"When I was growing up, I didn’t have a normal mom and dad, or a regular family like everybody else, and I always knew that something was missing. But now I’m standing here today, knowing that I have everything I’m ever gonna need… You are my family." — Phoebe
I kind of hated that line because Phoebe already had found her family in her friends and Mike just completed it for her. Here it sounds like her friends aren't as important to her now that she' has him.
"She's my friend and she needed help. If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you!" — Joey
"Okay, you have to stop the Q-Tip when there’s resistance." — Chandler
"You can’t just give up. Is that what a dinosaur would do?" — Joey
Monica: "Where've you been?"
Ross: "Emotional hell."
"When I first meet somebody it’s usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating." — Chandler
"Princess Consuela Bananahammock." — Phoebe
"Pivot!" — Ross
"Look at me! I’m Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes?" — Joey
"Only by achieving true unagi can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you." — Ross
"13 bathrooms in this place, I threw up in a coat closet." — Phoebe
"It's like all of my life everyone has always told me you're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe. And then today, I just stopped and I said, what if I don't want to be a shoe? What if I want to be a purse, you know, or a hat?" — Rachel
"Everybody looks so happy. I hate that." — Phoebe
"You know what? I just shouldn’t be allowed to make decisions anymore." — Rachel
"Over the line? You’re so far past the line that you can’t even see the line! The line is a dot to you!" — Joey
This one should be higher. "The line is a dot to you". Smartest thing Joey said, ever.
Ross: “My marriage, I think my marriage is kind of over.”
Phoebe: “Why?”
Ross: “Because my wife's a lesbian... And I'm not one.”
"Oh, you like that? You should hear my phone number." — Phoebe
"My sister's gonna have my baby!" — Frank Jr.
"I’m gonna go get one of those job things." — Rachel
"Isn’t this exciting! I earned this! I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally… not worth it. Who’s FICA? Why’s he getting all my money?" — Rachel
"Your collective dating record reads like a who's who of human crap." — Phoebe
"Just so you know, it’s not that common, it doesn’t happen to every guy, and it is a big deal!" — Rachel
"In Vegas. I was so drunk, I could've married Joey." — Ross
"Is it obvious that I’m wearing six sweaters?" — Joey
"Oh, I know. This must be so hard. ‘Oh, no! Two women love me. They’re both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet’s too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight!'" — Chandler
"Oh, my God, a woman flirting with a single man? We must alert the church elders!" — Phoebe
"Some girl ate Monica!" — Joey
"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!" — Chandelr
"How long do cats live? Like assuming you don’t throw ‘em under a bus or something?" — Rachel
Ross: “How about the time I cut the legs off your Malibu Ken?”
Monica: “That was you?”
Ross: “Uh... They were infected. He wouldn't have made it.”
Rachel: “Maybe we should take a break.”
Ross: “You're right. Let's cool off, get some frozen yogurt.”
Rachel: “No, a break from us.”
She would go on to regret her choice of words for nearly a decade..
"I’m sorry, it was a one-time thing. I was very drunk, and it was someone else’s subconscious." — Chandler
Ross: "You got a job?"
Rachel: "Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing!"
Literally me every time I apply for a job that has nothing to do with my college degree
"I'm a gym member. I try to go four times a week, but I've missed the last twelve hundred times." — Chandler
"I hope everyone likes Mexican food because I’m making FAJITAS!" — Ross
"I can handle this. 'Handle' is my middle name. Actually, 'handle' is the middle of my first name." — Chandler
"I’m glad we’re having a rehearsal dinner, I rarely practice my meals before I eat." — Chandler
"Yeah, well, Hurricane Gloria didn’t break the porch swing, Monica did!" — Ross
"You’ve been BAMBOOZLED!" — Joey
