Man Keeps Whining Despite Friend Helping Him With Housing And Job, She Finally Snaps And Says Enough

Having family by your side during tough times is important, but there are some wounds that only friends can heal. Some people, though, have no shame, as the only reason they have friends is to take advantage of them and mooch them dry.

That’s exactly what this guy is doing to his friend, who bent over backwards to help him. Not only did she give him a place to stay, but she also helped him bag a job. Despite all this, he ended up calling her a jerk, and she realized that she had had enough! Here’s what really happened…

More info: Reddit

Some people are so dependent on other people, they spend their whole lives mooching off others

Young woman helping 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and job while they share a moment at home.

Image credits: Stockbusters / Freepik (not the actual photo)

When the poster’s friend (Josh) had some trouble with his uni housing, she gave him a place to stay, but it was tough, so she had to kick him out

Text excerpt discussing a lady helping her 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job, facing complaints.

Lady helps 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job, but faces complaints and insults in return.

Alt text: Lady helps 23-year-old friend with housing and job, faces complaints and insults despite her support and efforts.

Image credits: Necessary_Mine_762

Young man playing video games in messy room after lady helps 23YO friend with a place to stay and a job

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

She even helped him get a job at her company, but Josh just refused to pull his own weight and kept complaining about everything

Friendship tested as lady helps 23YO friend with a place to stay and job but faces complaints and insults.

Man complains and insults after lady helps 23YO friend with a place to stay and a job, while others clean and cook.

Text about a lady helping a 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and job, facing complaints and insults.

Image credits: Necessary_Mine_762

Woman helping 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job while he lounges on the couch using his phone.

Image credits: Grinvalds / Freepik (not the actual photo)

As his manager, she called him out for being late, but he called her a jerk, and she finally had enough of his mooching behavior

Text showing a friend’s complaints and insults despite help with a place to stay and a job from a lady.

Text about a lady helping her 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job, then facing complaints and insults.

Text on a note explaining suspicion of undiagnosed ADHD or depression and missed therapy appointments for a 23-year-old friend.

Text image showing the phrase So... am I the a-hole, referencing a story about a lady helping a young friend with support.

Despite bending over backwards for him for ages, he’s now avoiding her, and even requested a new manager at their company

In today’s story, the original poster (OP) tells us that she has known her friend (Josh) for the past 8 years, but now she’s sick of his behavior. A few years back, when he was going through a housing crisis, she generously offered him a place to stay. Little did she know that he would be the worst roommate ever, as he barely helped out and depended on her for everything.

Well, she soon realized that it was just too cumbersome for her, and she asked him to move out. However, that did not mean that she stopped helping him. He wouldn’t quit whining about money, so she got him a job in her company with a 40% hike compared to his previous salary. Despite all this spoonfeeding that he received, Josh just refused to change.

Since he kept complaining about the numerous things that he was still struggling with, their friends supported him as much as they could. However, one day, OP realized that she couldn’t keep doing this when he refused to step up and take responsibility for himself. He even came in late at work, so she called him out as his manager, but he called her a jerk for trying to “sabotage” him.

It’s unbelievable that after everything she has done, this is how he repaid her! She snapped back and said that his life would improve if he didn’t rely on strategic incompetence. Ever since, he has been avoiding her and even requested a new manager. Now, OP feels that she ruined things by mixing her personal life with her professional one.

She also added that she suspects Josh has undiagnosed ADHD or depression, so she tried to get him into therapy. Of course, lazy Josh always bailed!

Young woman helping 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job in a bright, modern office setting.

Image credits: pressfoto / Freepik (not the actual photo)

To get better insights into the matter, Bored Panda reached out to Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She explained that helping a friend is a great thing, but sometimes it can cross the line into enabling, and that’s when it gets tricky. When you keep enabling a friend, even if you mean well, it can actually do more harm than good.

“They stop figuring out how to handle life on their own, like cooking, budgeting, showing up on time, or managing adult responsibilities. And if they’re dealing with ADHD or depression, enabling can actually get in the way of real progress. Instead of learning coping skills or getting proper help, they’re just getting temporary fixes from a friend, which doesn’t solve the root of the problem,” she added.

Many people claimed that the poster should cut ties with him, so we asked our expert whether such a friendship can survive. She claimed that it might, but only if Josh is willing to reflect, take accountability, and grow. However, Prof. Lobo believes that sometimes, distance is the healthiest option. 

“Sometimes, stepping back is actually an act of care, for yourself and for the other person. Continuing a one-sided friendship can quietly build resentment, and that can do more long-term damage. If Josh ever shows genuine change and wants to reconnect in a more balanced way, the poster will know. And if not, it’s still okay to move forward with peace, knowing she truly tried,” Prof. Lobo concluded.

Well, I hope that OP realizes this too, and does what is necessary for her own well-being as well. What about you? What would you do in her shoes? Let us know in the comments!

Folks found Josh’s entitled behavior highly problematic, and claimed that the poster should have stopped enabling him long ago

Text conversation discussing a lady helping a 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job, facing complaints.

Text conversation showing a heated argument about a man who was given a job and repays with complaints and insults.

Reddit comments discussing a lady helping her 23-year-old friend with a place to stay and a job but facing complaints and insults.

Young woman helping friend with a place to stay and a job, facing complaints and insults in return.

Comment praising a lady who helps a 23-year-old friend with housing and a job despite his complaints and insults.

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Screenshot of an online comment saying "NTA. You're his friend, not his mother," related to a lady helping a 23-year-old friend.

Comment discussing a 23-year-old friend repaying a lady’s help with complaints and insults instead of gratitude.

Screenshot of a social media comment discussing a friend repaying help with complaints, highlighting boundaries and respect.

Commenter discussing strategic incompetence and challenges after helping a 23-year-old friend with job and housing support.

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