Bullies aren’t born, they’re created. And they cause a lot of problems for people around them. Trying to help their victims — and everyone else — to make sense of it all, Tumblr user autasticanna shared what they consider to be “facts that adults don’t tell you about bullying.”

The post quickly went viral on the platform, and has already generated over 183,000 notes. But probably the comment section is what really highlights the list’s insightfulness. People who have been bullied themselves have been saying they found a lot of truth in autasticanna’s words. So continue scrolling and check them out. Maybe you will, too.

Image credits: autasticanna

Deliberately harming and humiliating others, specifically those who are smaller, weaker, and simply more vulnerable in general, peaks around ages 11 to 13 and decreases as children grow older.

While physical aggression such as kicking, hitting, and shoving is most common among younger children, relational aggression (damaging or manipulating the relationships of others by spreading rumors and social exclusion) is more common as children mature.

Experts say bullies become bullies very early in life: if the normal aggression of 2-year-olds is not handled with consistency, they fail to acquire internal restraints against such behavior. Thus, bullying remains a very durable behavioral style, largely because bullies get what they want.

Research shows that bullies have a distinct psychological makeup. They lack prosocial behavior, are untroubled by anxiety, and have little empathy. They do not really understand how others feel. They exhibit a kind of paranoia, too: they misread the intentions of others, often imputing hostility in neutral situations. Also, even though others may not like them, bullies typically see themselves quite positively.

Bullies, however, don’t pick on everyone. According to research, their victims lack assertiveness even in non-threatening situations and radiate fear long before they ever encounter a bully. Generally, these are children who don’t stand up for themselves and have poor social skills and few close friendships.

In the aftermath of repetitive bullying, victims may develop anxiety, depressive symptoms, and eating disorders.

With regard to anxiety, studies found that frequent bullying was a predicting factor for anxiety disorders in early adulthood.

As the post was going viral, people had a lot to say about it