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We all know that favoritism toward another person leads to nowhere good. It is most especially damaging among families if one sibling is blatantly more favored than the other.
What can worsen this situation is if the parents refuse to acknowledge these biases when called out and instead try to turn the tables on the affronted child.
This is precisely what happened in the story you’re about to read. And as you may expect, the outcome was nothing less than dramatic. Scroll down for the entire text.
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Blatant favoritism can be prevalent among many families
Woman in casual clothes holding a cup by the window in a kitchen, symbolizing sibling refusing to pay rent to parents.
It’s easier to see the pain that the less-favored child may be enduring from their biased parents. However, the golden child also has their fair share of struggles.
University of Missouri professor Dr. Megan Gilligan conducted a study and found that the favored child may also feel deep emotional distress. As she tells the BBC, the person may likewise experience the depressive symptoms that the less-favored child tends to go through.
What exacerbates these situations is that parents may intensify their biases once their children reach adulthood. According to Penn State University social psychologist Ilan Shira, parents may favor their children who live closer to them, share the same parental values, and provide emotional and financial support.
Favoritism can be less damaging if parents are transparent about it
Young woman confronting older woman outside, illustrating sibling refuses to keep paying rent to parents after discovering sister lives rent free.
Shira offered a caveat when it comes to parental favoritism: it can only be problematic when “there are consistent and arbitrary differences in treatment.”
“In cases where favoritism is unavoidable (e.g., with newborns, needier children), parents who explain its necessity to the other children can usually offset any negative consequences,” Shira wrote in an article for Psychology Today.
Northeastern University applied psychology professor Laurie Kramer shared a similar sentiment. She emphasized the importance of parents addressing such situations “in a sensitive manner,” where none of their children feel like they are taking the blame or feel at fault.
“You can have more open conversations on all sides to understand,” she said.
Instead of explaining why they weren’t making their daughter pay the same amount of rent, the parents lashed out at their child, who was merely airing their grievances. Worse, they blatantly took sides, which led to the explosive argument.
The author was justified in their actions, and it doesn’t seem like the situation will improve anytime soon. It may be best for them to move out and prioritize protecting their peace.
Many people sided with the author
Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing sibling refusing to keep paying rent after sister lives rent free with parents.
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Text conversation about sibling refusing to pay rent after discovering sister lives rent free with parents.
Sibling refuses to pay rent to parents after discovering sister lives rent free while parents complain about finances.
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Sibling refuses to keep paying rent to parents after finding out sister lives rent free, causing family conflict.
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Comment from user alissa2579 discussing rent payments and suggesting finding another place to live in a sibling rent dispute.
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Comment discussing unfair rent situation where sibling refuses to pay parents after sister lives rent free, calling it unfair.
Comment highlighting a sibling refusing to keep paying rent after discovering sister lives rent free, shared on a forum.
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Comment on Reddit discussing a sibling who refuses to keep paying rent to parents after learning sister lives rent free.
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Comment discussing sibling refusing to pay rent after discovering sister lives rent free, highlighting fairness in payments.
Reddit comment discussing sibling refusing to pay rent after discovering sister lives rent free with parents.
Comment discussing sibling refusing to pay rent after learning sister lives rent free, suggesting moving out to enforce fairness.
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Screenshot of an online comment about a sibling refusing to keep paying rent after learning sister lives rent free.
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Comment on sibling refusing to pay rent after discovering sister lives rent free, advising to move out and find roommates.
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Comment discussing sibling refusing to keep paying rent to parents after discovering sister lives rent free and advice on moving out.
Comment discussing sibling refusing to keep paying rent after finding out sister lives rent free with parents.
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Comment discussing refusal to keep paying rent after discovering sister lives rent free, highlighting unfairness and high cost.
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Comment discussing serious favoritism and a sibling refusing to keep paying rent after learning sister lives rent free.
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Sibling refuses to keep paying rent to parents after discovering sister lives rent free under the same roof.
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However, some thought everyone involved was at fault
Comment discussing a sibling refusing to pay rent after discovering sister lives rent free, advising to move out or get a roommate.
Comment advising sibling to stop paying rent after discovering sister lives rent free, highlighting family financial conflict.
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Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing rent payment issues between siblings and parents in a family conflict scenario.
Screenshot of a Reddit comment criticizing parents for being spineless after sibling refuses to keep paying rent.
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Comment discussing sibling conflict over parents’ unequal rent payments and resentment about sister living rent free.
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Comment discussing sibling refusing to keep paying rent after discovering sister lives rent free at parents' house.
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When my brother and I were out of hs he payed rent and I didn't but there was a good reason for that. I did all the housekeeping, was going to school, working part-time and was polite, got along well with my parents. My brother lied about going to school (wasted my parents money)ditched, spent the rest of his paycheck getting wasted, never lifted a finger to help, didn't even do his own laundry, constantly screamed at my parents, came home drunk and wrecked the place. They still only charged him like $200 a month. I would've gladly payed double or triple that if they kicked him out but I was saving up to get out of that toxic environment and they didn't blame me. The $200 wasn't even really rent. They were paying his phone bill, his car insurance, and he was basically paying them back for the tuition he squandered.
I didn't read the responses, but I do wonder if OP ever figured out that SHE was essentially paying for her sister's auto insurance, utilities and who knows what else.
Maybe the parents wouldn’t be in such a bind if they transferred the bills for sister’s phone and car insurance, and any other bills of hers they’re paying, back to sister. She’s two years out of college, and should be making a halfway decent wage. W*F is she doing with her paychecks if she’s not ponying up some cash for rent? Taking expensive vacations? Filling her closet with designer clothing? Gambling? What?
When my brother and I were out of hs he payed rent and I didn't but there was a good reason for that. I did all the housekeeping, was going to school, working part-time and was polite, got along well with my parents. My brother lied about going to school (wasted my parents money)ditched, spent the rest of his paycheck getting wasted, never lifted a finger to help, didn't even do his own laundry, constantly screamed at my parents, came home drunk and wrecked the place. They still only charged him like $200 a month. I would've gladly payed double or triple that if they kicked him out but I was saving up to get out of that toxic environment and they didn't blame me. The $200 wasn't even really rent. They were paying his phone bill, his car insurance, and he was basically paying them back for the tuition he squandered.
I didn't read the responses, but I do wonder if OP ever figured out that SHE was essentially paying for her sister's auto insurance, utilities and who knows what else.
Maybe the parents wouldn’t be in such a bind if they transferred the bills for sister’s phone and car insurance, and any other bills of hers they’re paying, back to sister. She’s two years out of college, and should be making a halfway decent wage. W*F is she doing with her paychecks if she’s not ponying up some cash for rent? Taking expensive vacations? Filling her closet with designer clothing? Gambling? What?
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