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Wife Challenges Her Husband To Give Her Cookie-Baking Tradition A Try, He Ends Up Upstaging Her, Family Drama Ensues
Recently, a man turned to the AITA community on Reddit to find out if he was wrong to upstage his wife in their baking tradition.
“My (25m) wife (23f) and I have had a tradition every Christmas where we would bake Christmas cookies and frost them with our friends. We’d then give the cookies out to friends and family and helpers,” the author Wirnei339oe3jrj explained.
However, this year, the Redditor’s wife was not able to attend the long-awaited cookie-baking day. And while the author saw no problem and offered to do his best in the baking marathon instead of her, his wife was not buying it.
Not only did she think she was the only one who knew how to do it, she thought her husband was joking. “Well, I said I’d try, and she wished me a sarcastic good luck,” Wirnei339oe3jrj recounted.
So he rolled up his sleeves and got straight to work. The challenge was accepted.
RELATED:
A man wonders whether he was wrong to upset his wife by nailing their cookie-baking tradition she thought she was the only one capable of mastering
Image credits: Jonathan Meyer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Keira Burton (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/wirnei339oe3jrj
The author then shared more details in response to these comments
While people’s opinions were split, some thought the author did nothing wrong
Others, however, were convinced that the author was the one to blame
The rest couldn’t make a decision on who’s right and who’s wrong in this situation while some people thought that both of them are jerks
What do you think ?
TotallyNOTaFox 3 years ago
So she basically gave an engineer a challenge and not expected him to optimize the process and succeed? That's a mistake on her side
Marcellus II 3 years ago
Her starting position of insulting her partner just to make yourself feel better isn't a winner either. Then afterwards saying they taste bad is just being a poor loser. Those people concluding "YTA" are just insane.
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Salsa Ambiguity 3 years ago
I'm an engineer and this post made me cringe a bit because I can really see myself in this guy, but not in a good way. I think it's especially important for us obsessive types to take a step back now and then and consider how our single mindedness is affecting the people around us. No one here is an a*****e but both have a bit of growing up to do.
Undercover 3 years ago (edited)
Thanks for saying that...! I know it is childish but I'm really proud of the fact that I can do some things "better" than my partner 🙈 we're both into cooking, but baking was depended on "my expertise" for many years. But now he's developed his skills and is getting really good at baking. He lets me do my stuff and praises it and is eager to learn some of my tricks (at least he pretends to do so 😅). Sometimes it isn't about efficiency and cost, it's more about recreateing a beloved memory (doing it, like mum or nanna did it, the ingredients, the setting, the smells... ). Or simply the feeling to be important and to matter... It's an emotional thing which needs to be dealt on an emotional level
Load More Replies...
Ivana Bašić 3 years ago
I'm always happy when I'm not the only one who can do something. Used to bake, wasn't bad, husband was often cooking, but never baked. He started, liked it, got really good, found a couple rockstar recipes, now he's the designated baker for any bday or school thing. Yaay!
Amy hipps 3 years ago
Exactly why can't she just be happy? He wasn't even thinking of upstaging her.
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Ash 3 years ago
I don't think the husband did anything wrong, but I think the wife was triggered by something. It sounds like she really hung a lot of her self-esteem on being the better baker, so when he seemed to do better than her, she took it harder than was really reasonable. He should talk to her about her feelings, because that's the real problem here. (That said, spending 40% more on making cookies might not be a small amount of money, and she might have a point there...) Also I can see her feeling left out, especially if everybody had as much fun as her husband clearly did with her not being there. There might be a tone problem in how he communicated it all to her.
Nicole Kosanke 3 years ago
Judging from how intense he was about this whole thing, I'd be surprised if this is the first time he's done something like this. Does he make a habit of turning everything into a competition and trying to "optimize" other people's methods of doing things? If so, I could see how this might be the last straw for her, since cookie making seems to be something she enjoys and takes pride in.
Load More Replies...
Violet Jensen 3 years ago
Who tf is saying YTA?? He said he’d do it. He did it in his personal style.
Historyharlot93 3 years ago
So he made 5x the amount of cookies? Why? All I can think of is how many of those cookies will be thrown away, because it sounds like the wife made more than enough normally. What a waste of food and time and unnecessary stress for everyone involved. ESH, husband for this idiotic approach, and the wife thinking he did it to make her look bad. If anything she should have been angry at the waste.
Ely Eliza 3 years ago
I've been to plenty parties where i wanted to take a few cookies home... There were 25 ADULTS there... I'm 100% sure most of them wanted to take a few home for kids or just for later....
Load More Replies...
Markus He/It/E/Cloud/Ti 3 years ago
Honestly, man, she was a b***h to him before the process and this feels like the best payback. "you can't make them as good as me and you shouldn't even try" making them as good and in greater amounts feels like a good reality check for someone who's being snobby. It shouldn't be a competition but she made it one in the first place
Kandrea's World 3 years ago
Your wife sounds extremely egotistical and narcissistic. She is the only one who can bake them "right" and you'd need "luck" to even try to hold a candle to her. I don't think you meant to but you took her down a peg or two. I also doubt the cookies tasted weird, because if they did, then you making more bad tasting cookies than her wouldn't have made her "look bad". If you would have failed miserably, then she would be joyfully rubbing it in your face because you can't ever be as good as her. As for how you reacted; she's been with you for 3 years and would know exactly how you would approach a project given to you. This is a egotistical narcissist who thinks the world would stop revolving without her. You noticed this before but apparently never challenged her god-like view of herself till now.
TotallyNOTaFox 3 years ago
So she basically gave an engineer a challenge and not expected him to optimize the process and succeed? That's a mistake on her side
Marcellus II 3 years ago
Her starting position of insulting her partner just to make yourself feel better isn't a winner either. Then afterwards saying they taste bad is just being a poor loser. Those people concluding "YTA" are just insane.
Load More Replies... Salsa Ambiguity 3 years ago
I'm an engineer and this post made me cringe a bit because I can really see myself in this guy, but not in a good way. I think it's especially important for us obsessive types to take a step back now and then and consider how our single mindedness is affecting the people around us. No one here is an a*****e but both have a bit of growing up to do.
Undercover 3 years ago (edited)
Thanks for saying that...! I know it is childish but I'm really proud of the fact that I can do some things "better" than my partner 🙈 we're both into cooking, but baking was depended on "my expertise" for many years. But now he's developed his skills and is getting really good at baking. He lets me do my stuff and praises it and is eager to learn some of my tricks (at least he pretends to do so 😅). Sometimes it isn't about efficiency and cost, it's more about recreateing a beloved memory (doing it, like mum or nanna did it, the ingredients, the setting, the smells... ). Or simply the feeling to be important and to matter... It's an emotional thing which needs to be dealt on an emotional level
Load More Replies... Ivana Bašić 3 years ago
I'm always happy when I'm not the only one who can do something. Used to bake, wasn't bad, husband was often cooking, but never baked. He started, liked it, got really good, found a couple rockstar recipes, now he's the designated baker for any bday or school thing. Yaay!
Amy hipps 3 years ago
Exactly why can't she just be happy? He wasn't even thinking of upstaging her.
Load More Replies... Ash 3 years ago
I don't think the husband did anything wrong, but I think the wife was triggered by something. It sounds like she really hung a lot of her self-esteem on being the better baker, so when he seemed to do better than her, she took it harder than was really reasonable. He should talk to her about her feelings, because that's the real problem here. (That said, spending 40% more on making cookies might not be a small amount of money, and she might have a point there...) Also I can see her feeling left out, especially if everybody had as much fun as her husband clearly did with her not being there. There might be a tone problem in how he communicated it all to her.
Nicole Kosanke 3 years ago
Judging from how intense he was about this whole thing, I'd be surprised if this is the first time he's done something like this. Does he make a habit of turning everything into a competition and trying to "optimize" other people's methods of doing things? If so, I could see how this might be the last straw for her, since cookie making seems to be something she enjoys and takes pride in.
Load More Replies... Violet Jensen 3 years ago
Who tf is saying YTA?? He said he’d do it. He did it in his personal style.
Historyharlot93 3 years ago
So he made 5x the amount of cookies? Why? All I can think of is how many of those cookies will be thrown away, because it sounds like the wife made more than enough normally. What a waste of food and time and unnecessary stress for everyone involved. ESH, husband for this idiotic approach, and the wife thinking he did it to make her look bad. If anything she should have been angry at the waste.
Ely Eliza 3 years ago
I've been to plenty parties where i wanted to take a few cookies home... There were 25 ADULTS there... I'm 100% sure most of them wanted to take a few home for kids or just for later....
Load More Replies... Markus He/It/E/Cloud/Ti 3 years ago
Honestly, man, she was a b***h to him before the process and this feels like the best payback. "you can't make them as good as me and you shouldn't even try" making them as good and in greater amounts feels like a good reality check for someone who's being snobby. It shouldn't be a competition but she made it one in the first place
Kandrea's World 3 years ago
Your wife sounds extremely egotistical and narcissistic. She is the only one who can bake them "right" and you'd need "luck" to even try to hold a candle to her. I don't think you meant to but you took her down a peg or two. I also doubt the cookies tasted weird, because if they did, then you making more bad tasting cookies than her wouldn't have made her "look bad". If you would have failed miserably, then she would be joyfully rubbing it in your face because you can't ever be as good as her. As for how you reacted; she's been with you for 3 years and would know exactly how you would approach a project given to you. This is a egotistical narcissist who thinks the world would stop revolving without her. You noticed this before but apparently never challenged her god-like view of herself till now.
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