Woman Who Doesn’t Have Kids Gets Slammed By Parents After Revealing She Prefers To Be Friends With People Who Have A Similar Lifestyle
Interview
Every one of us chooses how we want to live our lives. We can dream about getting married and having many many kids, or we can also dream about spending our life without getting married or having kids.
The same way we can choose what kind of people we want in our lives. Family people? Party people? Career people? It is really up to us to decide how we want to live our life.
More info: TikTok
While many of us live in a free world and have rights to choose however we want, some still like to police people about it
Image credits: danni___duncan
This child-free woman shared her position on wanting to have friends with the same lifestyle, but moms of the internet took issue with that
Image credits: danni___duncan
“Every time I talk about child-free people wanting to have child-free friends, I get this type of reaction from the moms”
“And my answer to the question of what’s wrong with having friends that have children is nothing. I never said that there was. I think a key thing that people are missing is that we are choosing to be child-free. We’re choosing to have a lifestyle that doesn’t include children in it. And so when all of our friends have children, well, you can see how that doesn’t really match up.”
Image credits: danni___duncan
“This is not to say that we don’t want to be around for your lifestyle, and we don’t want to hang out with you”
“But it would be really great to have friends that are choosing the same lifestyle as us so that we don’t have to work our social times around bedtimes, around eating times, around school holidays. Does that kind of make sense?”
Image credits: danni___duncan
The woman is a content creator, writer and influencer under the username danni___duncan, on both Instagram and TikTok. She is happily married and living her life child-free. The woman mostly shares with her audience her everyday life, showing that there is nothing wrong with living your life child-free and doesn’t let people shame her for that.
Even though the video was posted around one year ago, it is still viral and people still discuss it. Many people in the audience relate and share their personal experiences and views: “same way new mums want other mum friends,” one user wrote. Another woman added: “yes, all of this. I would also add – they mostly talk about their children and all things connected which i have zero interest in.”
People noted that it would be quite appropriate if it were the other way around, that is, if a woman with children indicated she wanted to be friends with other moms. The crowd stood up for the woman in the face of all the criticism, saying, “Individuals that don’t have kids are criticized frequently!”
Most significantly, people frequently misinterpret what they hear. For example, if the author stated that she wants to have friends with the same lifestyle, some mothers have claimed that she implied that there is something wrong with people who have kids. Turns out, parents become irritated when others are uninterested in their children’s life.
Image credits: danni___duncan
Bored Panda got in touch with Danni Duncan, the video creator, to acquire objective and deeper information on this popular internet topic.
“I’ve been talking about being child-free for about two years and one thing that’s been consistent is how quickly people misunderstand the purpose of what I’m saying – sometimes it feels like they are determined to read between the lines and find something that was never intended. Unfortunately this leads to people labeling me as a child hater, selfish and the list goes on,” creator started. “I’ve expressed that I want friends that don’t have kids (with the implied meaning that I also want friends who are choosing to remain child-free) so I have people to relate to. This, however, was interpreted as me saying I only want friends who don’t have kids – as if I’m just gonna cull everyone from my life who has them,” Danni clarified.
Additionally, the woman mentioned that some of her closest friends have children: “I am Aunty Danni and willingly spend time with them most weeks. I am most definitely not cutting them from my life, in fact if anything I hope they’ll be in my life till I’m old and grey.”
Now, the thing she wants people to understand, who, of course, misunderstood the whole situation, is that “my choice has nothing to do with you or your children. I personally adore kids, I just don’t want any of my own. My priorities and desire for my own future may be very different, but I respect yours and believe I deserve the same respect back.”
And finally, this discussion has gone on for about a year, if not longer. We asked for her input on what might be the cause of this. “So many reasons,” she started. “One could be because people have their own insecurities and unhappiness. They use my life as a mirror to reflect on their own and rather than self reflecting and sitting in the uncomfortableness, they choose to put it all back on the child-free people as if we’ve done something wrong. I also have noticed a lot of white older males in positions of power being very vocal about those that are child-free and I think it’s because we’re upsetting the patriarchy and it’s somehow threatening to them.”
Also, don’t forget to check out her Instagram and Tiktok! Get inspired by her positivity and learn to live your life how you want, not how people want you to live!
Image credits: Luana Freitas (not the actual photo)
You can check out the whole video below:
@danni___duncan♬ original sound – Danni Duncan
Folks in the comment section defended the creator and shared their personal opinions on this topic
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As a single, childless, 40 year old with a lot of friends that have kids, my stance has always been that kids are kids for a rather short period of time. And my friends still need their friends. Does the friendship look different, sure. Does it usually strengthen and grow both people, definitely. Mom and dad are not their names, they need people in their life that know, love, and support them as the individuals that they are.
A lot of my friends have been having kids over the last ten years or so too, and no I didn't stop being their friend. But on a purely practical level, I see way less of them now and can't do the same kinds of activities we used to. So that does leave a 'gap' in my time which I would like to meet more childfree friends to fill with, if that makes sense.
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Of course it is! As long as no one is judging each other for their choices. As a childless adult I don't deserve to be seen as "less" because I never experienced the joy of childbirth, or whatever. I actually love kids and am a fantastic aunt! I just don't want my own. But if you want to have 20 children more power to you! I respect that.
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I cannot have kids. Pretty much everyone in my friends group has had kids. Was it sometimes rough when the kids were young? Sure, but guess what I now have a bunch of young adults who love me for the cool auntie I am and that i get to love right back. Is it for everyone, nope. You do you and be the best you, you can!
As a single, childless, 40 year old with a lot of friends that have kids, my stance has always been that kids are kids for a rather short period of time. And my friends still need their friends. Does the friendship look different, sure. Does it usually strengthen and grow both people, definitely. Mom and dad are not their names, they need people in their life that know, love, and support them as the individuals that they are.
A lot of my friends have been having kids over the last ten years or so too, and no I didn't stop being their friend. But on a purely practical level, I see way less of them now and can't do the same kinds of activities we used to. So that does leave a 'gap' in my time which I would like to meet more childfree friends to fill with, if that makes sense.
Load More Replies... Of course it is! As long as no one is judging each other for their choices. As a childless adult I don't deserve to be seen as "less" because I never experienced the joy of childbirth, or whatever. I actually love kids and am a fantastic aunt! I just don't want my own. But if you want to have 20 children more power to you! I respect that.
Load More Replies... I cannot have kids. Pretty much everyone in my friends group has had kids. Was it sometimes rough when the kids were young? Sure, but guess what I now have a bunch of young adults who love me for the cool auntie I am and that i get to love right back. Is it for everyone, nope. You do you and be the best you, you can!
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