“Out Of Her Mind”: GF Expects BF To Pay For Her Kids And Her Ex’s Family To Take A Trip To Disney

Disney World is a dream destination for many kids, so, when they get the chance to visit it at Christmas, it’s double the fun. It gets more than 58 million tourists every year, and Christmas might be its busiest season.

This man wanted to make his girlfriend’s kids happy and take them to Disney World for Christmas. However, their dad and his new family soon chimed in and expected to be included in the present too. When the guy refused, his girlfriend got mad, and he soon had to cancel the trip. But he still wondered: was he the jerk in this situation?

These kids were getting a Christmas trip to Disney World from their mom’s BF, but their dad decided to ruin it

Disney castle with fireworks lighting the night sky, representing a family vacation trip.

Image credits: user18989612 (not the actual photo)

He and his new family asked to come too, and, for some reason, expected that all expenses would be paid

Text discusses taking kids to Disney, involving girlfriend's ex and his family in the trip.

Text conversation about a dispute over a Disney trip and family holiday planning, involving exes and reservations.

Text discussing staying at a hotel near Disney Springs for a trip with kids, emphasizing good amenities and experiences.

Family on a couch, mother playfully interacting with daughter, father holding another child, discussing Disney trip plans.

Image credits: Getty Images (not the actual photo)

Text discussing a canceled hotel reservation and unexpected trip expenses for an ex's family to Disney.

Text snippet discusses expectations about paying for a Disney trip, mentioning kids, a dad, and feelings about being called cheap.

Text conversation about a fight over trip expenses for kids and canceled flights to Disney.

Text conversation about ex's demands and manipulation issues.

Image credits: Livid_Chipmunk_2644

Setting boundaries around finances is paramount in blended families

The root of the conflict here seems to be the different expectations that the OP and his girlfriend have. She possibly expected him to cover her ex-husband’s expenses for the trip, not just her and her children’s. Ultimately, it all comes down to a lack of communication.

Talking about money can be hard at the beginning of a relationship. In the initial stages, partners might have reservations and doubts about asking inappropriate questions and sharing too much. However, talking about money is important so that both partners can be on the same page when it comes to finances.

Associate Marriage and Family Therapist Christopher Underwood tells Bored Panda that setting clear boundaries around finances is important in all types of relationships. But it’s especially important when there are children from a previous marriage involved. And what the couple decides at the beginning might change as the relationship progresses.

“Boundaries help establish clear expectations and foster a sense of security during each stage of a relationship,” he explains. “As couples grow and develop a deep connection, these boundaries may evolve in response to the relationship’s emotional health and stability.”

“Establishing boundaries also plays a key role in promoting healthy communication, which is essential for long-term relationship satisfaction,” Underwood notes. There really is no one-size-fits-all solution here. To each couple, these boundaries will look different, as couples have different dynamics.

The children are the ones who got the shortest end of the stick in this situation

The OP, therefore, should’ve communicated what he’s willing and not willing to pay for in this situation. After all, it’s his money, and he makes the decisions about where he spends it. His girlfriend and the children might react by feeling undervalued and less important, but the OP shouldn’t be forced to pay for their father’s trip.

However, when thinking about finances in a blended family, we also have to remember that there are children involved. When the OP decides to cancel the trip to Disneyland, it might affect his relationship with the children and their trust in the future (provided that he stays with their mother).

“It is important to consider the ethical implications of these boundaries, especially when they affect family members, such as children or stepchildren,” Underwood observed. The therapist claims that establishing boundaries around money benefits the couple as well as promotes a healthy family environment.

If the OP considered becoming the kids’ stepfather, that should’ve crossed his mind. “By providing a structured foundation, clear boundaries can help manage expectations and contribute to the emotional well-being of all family members,” Underwood believes.

Many people backed the OP for standing his ground and said that the girlfriend’s reaction is suspicious at best

Comment on financial expectations in relationships, mentioning a gift and a vacation dilemma with ex-family.

Text response discussing a girlfriend's ex, manipulation, and issues with kids.

Reddit comment discussing expectations for someone to pay for another's hotel and passes, questioning the fairness.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing the expectation for a boyfriend to fund a girlfriend's ex's family Disney trip.

Reddit comment discussing a relationship, suggesting it's time to reevaluate due to financial expectations involving kids and trips.

Text discussion about girlfriend expecting boyfriend to pay for Disney trip including her kids and her ex's family.

Comment criticizing GF for expecting BF to fund Disney trip for her kids and ex's family.

Screenshot of a Reddit comment questioning the expectations in a relationship regarding financial responsibilities.

Comment discussing a situation where a girlfriend expects her boyfriend to pay for her kids and ex’s family trip to Disney.

Comment highlighting concerns about funding a family trip to Disney.

Comment discussing financial expectations for Disney trip involving girlfriend's kids and ex's family.

Reddit comment criticizing a girlfriend’s demand for her boyfriend to fund a Disney trip for her kids and ex's family.

Comment questioning girlfriend's expectation for boyfriend to pay for her ex's family's Disney trip.

Reddit comment criticizing a girlfriend's expectations of her boyfriend to fund her kids' Disney trip.

Comment discussing relationship dynamics and emotional involvement with an ex in context of a Disney trip.

Poll Question

Total votes ·

Thanks! Check out the results:

Total votes ·

Newsletter

Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls

Subscribe

By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.

Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!

Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!

Follow Bored Panda on Google News!

Follow us on Flipboard.com/@boredpanda!