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“Just Gross To Me”: 50 People Share Red Flags That They Always Look Out For In People’s Homes
Welcome to my humble abode! Please take off your shoes at the front door and wash your hands when you come inside. Relax, and make yourself at home. And don’t mind the massive pile of moldy dishes in the kitchen sink. I promise, I’ll get to it later today…
You can learn a lot about a person by visiting their house. And sometimes, you realize that you don’t actually want to associate with them at all. Redditors have been discussing the biggest red flags that they’re on the lookout for when visiting a potential partner’s home, so we’ve gathered their thoughts down below. From disgusting living conditions to downright creepy decorations, be sure to upvote the things that would send you running for the hills too!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Anything MAGA related.
Wild Cream 4 months ago
Studies show people with far right-wing authoritarian views (aka MAGA) lack grey matter in some pretty significant areas of the brain related to things like empathy and social reasoning. It’s really interesting, here’s a pasted explanation and a link: Research indicates that right-wing authoritarianism (RWA) is associated with differences in brain structure and function, particularly in areas related to social cognition and empathy. Specifically, studies have found that individuals with higher RWA scores have less gray matter volume in the dorsomedial prefrontal cortex, an area crucial for understanding others' perspectives. Additionally, RWA is linked to cognitive errors and faulty reasoning, including difficulty with belief updating and making incorrect inferences. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/40250728/
Thee8thsense 4 months ago
It is said that people find it easier to believe lies then to accept that they have been lied to. Sometimes we can provide a maga person a safe place within a discussion to reveal that they feel differently now that their leader has shown more and more of his true nature. It requires temperance of our own opinions likely, but might feel good when said and done.
XenoMurph 4 months ago
You cannot convince someone with logic if they have not arrived at their current thinking by logic. Studies have shown that conservatives are by nature afraid. That's an emotion. It's why they carry guns and don't like new things/people/ideas. The mentality is that what they did as kids was good (nostalgia) and new stuff is inherently suspicious. You might manage to convince someone that one particular new thing is safe. But you can;t make them like it.
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MagicJacket 4 months ago
I went to a funeral last year where some old idiot showed up in blue jeans, a flannel shirt and a monstrosity of a Trump 45-47 hat. Didn't even take it off during the service. Sat right in front of me. Only respect for the deceased and general public decency kept me from swatting that accursed cap off his dirty old head.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
I’d turn around and walk out the door and never come back.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Breaking out the popcorn to watch the fight between jasper and Nova Rook! 🍿
Multa Nocte 4 months ago
Jasper's an idiot, so it ought to be an easy fight.
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Arthur Waite 4 months ago
One of my old friends at the gun club showed up with a bright red hat with "Canada Has Always Been Great". Now I'm looking for one.
Day Andie 4 months ago
Unless you're LBGTQ, brown, not Xtian, believe in free speech not censorship, don't support the NRA, think no one is above the law, or don't keep your mouth shut and your head down. Then the knives are out.
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Tamra 4 months ago
Oh for f*ck sake, here we go again. Maga culture is NOT mainstream American culture, you fool. You don't live here, but blather on and ON about this. America has never been more divided because of that orange cancer and his brain dead cult. Our entire country is at war with itself, perhaps not literally, but it feels d**n close. So to say it is our mainstream culture is disingenuous and completely false. In future, if you're going to talk out of your a$$, kindly remove your head first so we can understand you.
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RELATED:
#2
Mistreated/neglected animals i.e a dog constantly kept tied outside with no shelter, a cat with a super dirty litter box, or a fish with a disgusting tank.
tisnik:
The litter box is SO true. I don't even have a pet, but once I was visiting my sister and her roommate had cats. The litter box looked as if it wasn't cleaned for more than week. My other friend's cats wouldn't even go near that thing.
Thee8thsense 4 months ago
Pets give us so much, and I believe it should not only be our duty, but our joy to provide them with the best possible life.
PeepPeep the duck 4 months ago (edited)
I ended up putting my litter box in the toilet room with me, then I have no excuse but to keep it in tip top shape for kitty and the house hold (every two days just wasn’t cutting it for me ).
Nikki van Reenen 4 months ago
If you have a pet, you have chosen that animal to live with you. The animal had no choice. I believe it is your duty to provide it with the best life you can afford - financially and emotionally / mentally. And if you can't do that, there are shelters and adoption agencies that can help.
Dog Mom to Zoe 4 months ago
I cook for my dogs on top of kibble. Trying to ween them off kibble for better health.
Papa 4 months ago
I would like some clarity on what OP meant by disgusting fish tank. A pristine tank is not a healthy environment for fish. The bacteria that breaks the ammonia secreted by the fish down into less toxic substances lives on the surfaces in the tank and filter, and cleaning too well removes much of that. I keep the front of my tanks (and sometimes one side if it's visible) clean, but leave the others alone.
Colleen Glim 4 months ago
Increased filtration and live plants is a much better way to deal with it. The filtration keeps the water clean and the roots of the plants keep the substrate clean. The whole idea is to create a mini ecosystem
Load More Replies... #3
Anything hateful, or racist.
Nova Rook 4 months ago
I stopped wearing my red cap that had a Canadian flag on it, just because I'm of the age and ethnicity that many maga adherents belong to. I bought a nice blue and white expos cap and literally get compliments and nods for it every week.
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#4
Confederate flag.
Cathleen Cummings 4 months ago
This is right up- there with a swastika! (And should be higher on this list.)
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
The Názi perversion of the swastika, the Hakenkreuz, was not a sign of treachery. The Confederate Battle Flag was the flag of treachery - and yet the Confederate flag remains widely revered in the US while Názi symbology (rightly) is criminalized in Germany. "Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swastika#Nazism and https://constitution.congress.gov/browse/article-3/section-3/
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SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Hell to the no. I’m turning around, walking out the door, never coming back, and blocking their number.
knightmareshade 4 months ago
I once had a college professor argue with me that the flag wasn’t racially offensive, it was just misunderstood. Person visited friends in South Carolina that had one hanging up in their living room. She tried so hard to say it was acceptable and got very angry with me when I called her out. Of course, this is the same woman who had a kind of hammock on her ceiling with a small fish bowl in the center of it with a betta. I called her out on that too. The fish had no room, no water/air circulation and the water was filthy. She failed me, even though I passed my exams. I had to report her.
#5
There’s no hand soap in the bathroom.
PeepPeep the duck 4 months ago
I had a lot of bachelor friends like this 😂 no TP, no light in the bathroom either
Huddo's sister 4 months ago
My sister specifically bought hand towels for my brother's housewarming, because he didn't use them when living alone. He now lives with his partner and they still don't use hand towels! I was over there to meet their new baby on the weekend and he didn't see the issue with us just drying hands on their bath towels.
Load More Replies... #6
Pet feces/urine. I understand there are accidents (I've always had pets - s**t happens) but if you just are lazy or don't potty train then that is a total red flag.
#7
No books.
Galita 4 months ago
This is a bit tricky. Some of us may be on the ‘less is more’ side of things, and may a vast e-library. In my case the few printed books are technical or reference (on writing, languages, “for dummies” too… no shame! )
Emilu 4 months ago (edited)
Yeah, it's definitely harder to judge that nowadays with eReaders becoming more popular. And also, y'know, general storage logistics. I know personally I have lots of books, but they're not in the main areas in which I entertain, etc, so people could easily assume I don't have any. Mine are kept in the study, and there'd be no reason for me to take someone there on a first date unless they specifically asked to see my book collection (which would be a tad odd IMO, unless it happened organically).
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Orysha 4 months ago
You know some people don't like to read, that doesn't make them automatically bad people.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Not bad people at all, but probably not very compatible with me as a romantic interest or even a close platonic friend. We could be good acquaintances, though.
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Mreoww 4 months ago
It’s not downright terrible if they don’t read much. Plus, e-books exist, maybe they just don’t like clutter? However, if they were flaunting not reading, that’s a very different story. If they simply just don’t like to read much, it’s not that bad.
Emilu 4 months ago
Agreed. I have no issues with people not liking reading, or choosing to not read much. Personally, I’d have more of an issue with someone who point blank refuses/shows no interest in learning new things, because that’d be a compatibility issue.
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Daniela Lavanza 4 months ago
Knowledge today no longer lies in books only...digital ways allow us to learn about much without the need for a big personal library. Speaking with someone can make you discover they are highly knowledgeable in various fields which you would never have suspected just looking at their shelves.
Toni Ahlgren 4 months ago
Why is not having a books on display a bad thing? We have tons of books in our storage and not collecting dust in the living room shelves.
Bret Sander 4 months ago
I don't hoard knowledge. If it was a good book for me, I pass it on to someone I think will benefit from it. Anyone that judges based on the amount of books accumulated is a snob. Or to quote Gloria Upson in Auntie Mame, "I LOVE books, they're SO decorative".
#8
A big sw*stika flag in the living room.
T'Mar of Vulcan 4 months ago
Unless they're Hindu. That sign is a symbol of (I think) friendship for Hindu people (but obviously not with the same colour combination).
Jerry Jacques 4 months ago
Could be the same colors but it was mirrored so it turns the wrong way. Just proves people now just get their facts from youtube and ticttock and run with them. @T'Mar of Vulcan at least you have a clue.
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CartoonCasey 4 months ago
I would think there would be ample warning signs long before you ran face first into a giant swastika flag hanging in their house.
Roxy222uk 4 months ago
Um, again, how are you getting invited around to the house of someone with a big swāstika on the wall and it’s a surprise to you?
persephone134 4 months ago
Anything swastika-related is illegal in Germany, you can go to jail for owning it.
UMUMO 4 months ago
N**i-related, not swastika-related. Swastikas are a holy buddhist symbol.
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#9
The level of cleanliness. I understand that people have busy lives and im not expecting sterile hospital clean but if you a stay at home person and can’t be bothered to pick up the piles of stuff and let your pets use the floor as a bathroom im immediately walking back out.
Barbara Wilcock 4 months ago
Lots of people with depression and anxiety don't see the mess. It's not their fault
Wild Cream 4 months ago
To a point. I have severe depression and my house is horrific, but the one thing I do have energy to do is take care of my cats. Food, water, and litter boxes are pretty much the only thing I can summon energy for. No judgement for a horrifically messy house but please don’t let your pets suffer too, and if you’re worried it’s at that stage, please seek help for them so you can get your own help without negatively affecting their quality of life
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The Darkest Timeline 4 months ago
There are some commenters here that think not dusting is “disrespectful” to guests. I mean, there is a point at which it’s gross but it’s a minor thing, especially if you know each other well. But, yes, your home should be “tidy” if you’re expecting people.
jasper 4 months ago
Reminds me of the Friends episode where Ross dates the hot girl who is a disgusting slob.
BrownEyedGrrl 4 months ago
That was hilarious! I still laugh out loud about the look on his face when he has bologna in his hand.
Load More Replies... #10
A whole bunch of Jesus s**t, guns on the wall, confederate flags.
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago
Be very polite, agree with everything they say, make a credible excuse, shake hands and leave with a smile, get in your car, drive away quite normally. And when you've got half a mile down the road, put your foot to the floor and get the héll out of there...
Miracle Max 4 months ago
It's the "Don't Tread on Me" or Gadsden flag. It is an important historical artifact, as it was one of the first flags used by the Continental Army in 1775.
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#11
A Live, Laugh, Love sign.
TheUnknown285:
Unless it's the Rob Zombie parody: "Live through the ditches, Laugh through the witches, Love in the back of my Dracula."
Barbara Wilcock 4 months ago
Hate all those signs and love hearts everywhere. You're trying to hard
Anthony Elmore 4 months ago (edited)
It's a Dragula you uncultured heathen. But the typo doesn't make that sign any less amazing.
Rachel Reynolds 4 months ago
I have "Live, Laugh, Lurk" with a cute little Mothman peeking out from behind it
Bored Trash Panda 4 months ago
THAT is most definitely acceptable. If I could upvote more than once, I would.
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TheRightToArmBears (riff/tone) 4 months ago
My band's last album did a play on that: Die, Cry, Loathe
Ripley 4 months ago
They're not supposed to be the lyrics. It's supposed to be a parody - even says it right there in the comment.
Load More Replies... Arthur Waite 4 months ago
I'm sorry, but what's wrong with this phrase? I've had it on my front door for about thirty years now and I think it's a good standard to live by. Please explain.
#12
Gun owner one: Weapons lying out in the open. Not all guns need be in a pristine luxury safe, but weapons should be stored in a main place with the ammo nearby. Guns scattered around speaks to laxity in safety and maintenance. The sort of people who you'll see in r/idiotswithguns or r/morbidreality one day.
Hannah 4 months ago
Have you considered the possibility of not having any gun anywhere? Statistics aren't great for the US (for example) on this front.
TheGreaterDebater 4 months ago (edited)
It's great for Switzerland, Iceland, and Norway! All of which have incredibly good gun ownership laws and EXTREMELY low crime. We need to change the system, not the product.
Load More Replies... GalPalAl 4 months ago
I don't trust that anyone who has a gun could one day snap and decide to use that gun to k**l someone. Dealbreaker for me
Nova Rook 4 months ago
Someone could do the same with a knife though. While guns do make killing easier, and mass murder much easier, a single 'snap' murder is just as easily accomplished with a knife. Maybe where you live owning a gun is a flag, where I live owning a gun demonstrates a person has been well vetted by the federal police and is likely a 'safer' person than a non gun owner. I had to have my wife and two other people (I chose co workers) sign off on my application - along with anyone I've dated (can't remember the exact wording) for the last 5 years (I think it was 5, it may have been more - I've been with my wife for decades so this wasn't an issue for me). I think that's a pretty thorough check with the opportunity for many people to express concerns and thwart my application. And this is so I can buy long arms - the process for handguns is even more complicated, especially in Quebec. Does anyone where else go to the same lengths? I honestly do not know.
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Michael Largey 4 months ago
And if they're careless with guns, imagine what else they'll be careless with.
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
UK here: any open sign of firearms in the home at all - unless it's obvious antiques displayed on the wall. I've visited homes where I've known there's firearms stored securely somewhere, but you know what? You'd never know, and the owner would never tell. (I could say other things - I attended a high school which kept firearms and ammunition on the premises. But they were kept behind *two* locked doors, one of which was heavy-duty riveted steel construction of the sort you'd associate with a ship. Which outer door was, alas, left open one day, along with the plain wooden inner door, which is how come I saw what was inside. Oops. 😬)
Nova Rook 4 months ago
As a gun owner in Canada I take safety very seriously. My rifle is locked up, and the ammo would be hard to find (it's on a crammed looking bookshelf stuck between some big books) and I keep the bolt in another room tucked away where you would only find it if you reached way back into a drawer. If you are a gun owner then you have a very serious responsibility to ensure that it is being kept safely.
Roxy222uk 4 months ago
As a Brit if an American invited me into their house and there were guns on display, I don’t care how good their gun discipline is or anything else, I’m backing out. I would be gutted to have to offend their politeness, but I’d maybe sit in the garden or something, I’m not going in that house.
#13
Cameras in every room, especially more private spaces, such a bedrooms and bathrooms.
BookFanatic 4 months ago
I used to think this way. Cameras can be lifesaving. My neighbors were advised to put up cameras in order to prove their teen was stealing booze. Ended catching up the teen threatening to end their parents and pulling a knife on their mom. Teen does not live with them any longer.
Roxy222uk 4 months ago
If that is why the cameras are up I probably don’t want to hang around in that house either
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#14
If the house is dirty. I don't care about kids toys all over the place. I care that the dog pooped at least a week ago and no one cleaned it up. That tells me I probably don't want to sit on any surface or eat anything. And my clothing needs to go straight into the wash when I get home.
Jack Handy 4 months ago
Do people actually not clean up if a dog poops I the house? I’m disgusted just seeing poop left in the sidewalk.
Mark McCawley 4 months ago
I knew someone who let their un-diapered kid pee on the carpet. Also used the couches arm as a napkin. All the arms of the couch and chairs were all black and crusty. And by kid, I mean their son, not a goat.
Cooking Panda 4 months ago
Having 2 young kids meaning my house is mostly a mess. But I make sure that it's clean. There could be toys, books, crayons, papers, scattered around the house but no dirty dishes, trash, or anything that smells bad.
LooseSeal's $10 Banana 4 months ago
Yep, big difference between tidiness and genuine cleanliness.
Alexia 4 months ago
My house is messy (and even dirty here and there) right now. A few weeks ago I underwent a major abdominal surgery. While I'm generally feeling ok, the way I move was significantly altered (cannot bend, cannot stay straight, cannot stand more than a few minutes). So apart from the very basic (which includes care for my pet) everything else related to house chores can wait.
MadMonkey 4 months ago
And rightly so. When I'm sick, I let things slide until I feel better. You are facing a longer healing session. Don't worry about it now, heal up first.
Load More Replies... Roxy222uk 4 months ago
Third mention of pet faeces just left on the carpet? I’ve been in some messy houses in my day, never, ever seen that. Anyone reading the comments who’s seen it?
Huddo's sister 4 months ago
At my mum's place occasionally (actually more than occasionally if you count it being in the bath, but I don't usually stay overnight) and it baffles me!
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Jan 4 months ago
My cat had a d*********y yesterday. Not only did I wipe and clean it up, he was promptly given a refresh of his hygienic trim. Apparently this was overdue. I like to think he considers this my poor attempts at shared grooming since he absolutely hates the trim. It was the smell that alerted me to the problem and I cannot imagine just letting a pile of dog poop sit there. How could one not clean this up?
Jan 4 months ago
Okay let's clarify a dInGle BeRrY. In case that word gets censored again it is poop caught in the fur around that area.
Load More Replies... #15
If things are to clean I get concerned. Like if you don’t have a drawer in ur kitchen full of b******t something up. I went to someone’s house one time and it literally felt like a sterile environment, there was so much white and it just felt impossibly clean and almost uncomfortable. I didn’t want to touch a single thing. Nobody could live like that. I don’t like slobs but there’s something about super clean houses that says serial k**ler.
Solidhog 4 months ago
A bit along the same line, a house with children but there are no signs of toys left out or being played with.
Neb 4 months ago
This is actually sad... Unless they mostly play in their room?
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BookFanatic 4 months ago
A house is a home, not a museum. If you're afraid to touch anything, how can you ever relax?
Alexia 4 months ago
I had a friend who was obsessed with cleanliness. I visited her once and I felt truly uncomfortable. No shade of dust, no spot, everything was shining and seemed ready for a magazine photoshoot. The towels were perfectly folded and aligned, she cleaned the floor several times per day and she washed her windows every week (although there was no need to). I knew I would never return there.
Dog Mom to Zoe 4 months ago
I call these "don't touch me homes". I had an Aunt that way. She would pick lint off of her sofa.
Emma London 4 months ago
My ex-bf's house was too clean, even his fridge was so clean that you could see that he hardly kept anything in there. The reason? He was autistic. And a really lovely person!
#16
Ok so I have a friend I will call him B. Well B and I went to school together and recently started hanging out. We always enjoyed each others company. He wanted to be in a relationship but I didn't feel the same. A few weeks ago, he asked if I wanted to come over and watch a movie. I said sure and he picked me up after he ran some errands. We get to his place and next to his recliner were two large cups filled with pee. I was instantly grossed out. As he hurried to clear the pee cups he said “You weren't supposed to see that.” I guess he falls asleep in his recliner and when he has to pee, he just goes is a cup instead of going to the bathroom. That was just gross to me.
Hannah 4 months ago
Once worked in a homeless shelter, sometimes in the 'day room' there were one or two people who would get up, stagger towards the bin, then wee in there. Stagger back, but not do up their trousers or even pull up their underwear. Very sad.
Load More Replies... #17
The flag of the soviet union is a big red flag.
Alexia 4 months ago
In some cases, it's just ignorance. Some teenagers in the neighborhood were wearing t-shirts with Che Guevara, cause they thought it was cool. And I asked them "you do know that this guy would have executed you with no hesitation, as "capitalist enemies" that you are?" They googled for more info and... I've never seen those t-shirts after that. :))
#18
That picture of the whole family with the K*K hoods is a slight turnoff.
#19
Dirty.
Not an unclean kitchen type dirty but when it's clear the snack wrappers have formed an alliance and are warring with the dirty clothes for dominance..
Dog Mom to Zoe 4 months ago (edited)
I had an acquaintance that never cleaned her stove. The grime and rust around the burners was disgusting. I drove a co worker to her home and asked if I could use her bathroom. I walked in, held it until I was able to get home. The toilet bowl was BLACK. H.O.W.???
Huddo's sister 4 months ago
My mum's toilet ended up like that- she took the 'if it's yellow, let it mellow' idea too far and didn't clean it often enough. That was at her old place, I'm worried the new one is on it's way there.
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#20
Filth. Not disarray or clutter - caked on, grimy, black crusted filth on things that should be cleaned on a daily. And roaches.
BookFanatic 4 months ago
OMG, yes, roaches. I understand like a random roach. Bugs get everywhere. But I visited a friend whose house was Roach Central. Roach poop everywhere, roaches on the toothbrushes, roaches on the potty. Roaches in the fridge. I opted not to stay for supper.
Neb 4 months ago
Wow. I know I got fruit flies in the fridge and freezer when once forgot to throw out some cherry pits (they were hiding well) when leaving for 2 weeks trip. But they were destroyed and cleaned out pretty fast after I returned and found them. and definitely had no visitors during then. But roaches in fridge?
Load More Replies... #21
I once had a date with a guy I had encountered several times when I was out with my friends. He was kind of shy (which I like), attractive but not necessarily handsome, just an average guy (which I like).
He asked me to dance every time we ran into each other and we had good conversations and laughs. I really liked him. He finally asked me out on a date. We went to dinner, had a great time, then he asked me if I’d like to come back to his place. Thinking I knew him well enough to say yes, we went to his house. He had 2 roommates who were also very nice and courteous. The roommates had a couple girls there which made a bit of a crowd. My date suggested we go into the den so we could listen to some music and talk for a while. I agreed.
We walked into “the den” and there was a huge bed! THAT was not the worst of it. The bed was surrounded with every type of camera you could imagine, all of them pointing toward that bed. There were studio type lights also surrounding the bed. As I stood in the doorway with my mouth open, the two roommates entered and turned on the lights and got ready to man the cameras.
Needless to say I exited that scene immediately. Every time I’d run into this guy he’d apologize and ask for another chance. Yeah, sure, idiot.
Anthony Elmore 4 months ago
Wait, so THIS is the story you believe? Dude goes through the trouble of setting up a studio in his den with a giant bed for professional quality p**n videos with the person that's just coming over for the first time while his friends film. At no point during this did he think to ask if that was cool with them. And when they didn't want to make a surprise amateur p**n video he has the nerve and lack of sense to call and think they might get a second chance?
Load More Replies... CartoonCasey 4 months ago
Pro tip: Nobody reacts gracefully to a surprise encounter with a pornography studio. Be sure to inform any future 'guests' before you invite them into your s*x dungeon. It's called manners. You are going to give s*x fiends a bad name if you're not careful.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
Candidate for a citizens’ watchlist of potential dangerous âsshôles.
#22
Are they hoarders.
livinginafreefall:
My mom was (& still is) a hoarder and no matter how many times people try to help her or get her help, it goes nowhere. It’s a mental thing and even throwing away so much as a dirty, used napkin can warrant a temper tantrum. She refused to let us have friends over bc of the state of the house & it took a toll on the social life of my siblings & I since other kids & their parents always ended up feeling used & couldn’t understand why they couldn’t come over bc it was embarrassing to explain & we were terrified of saying why bc then it would open us up to bullying at school
Emilu 4 months ago
Hoarding is a mental health issue, as the poster states. I can understand how it might put off prospective dates, but at the same time it's not the same as just being a pig for the sake of it. I personally would treat a hoarder with the same empathy as anyone else with other mental health issues. Maybe not move in with them, though. 😆
Roxy222uk 4 months ago
They need support with their mental health, not being forced to get rid of the stuff that brings them security
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Kim Kermes 4 months ago
That is not a picture of hoarding. It is a picture of a very small apartment with many books, which would be a green flag.
Emilu 4 months ago
Massive +1 here. For those that doubt, YouTube 'hoarding' and see what actual hoarding is.
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Tim Gearing 4 months ago (edited)
Don’t confuse a hoarder and a collector; a collector knows where everything is. Apart from that, I’d love to get my hands on that bike frame.😅
HellsBells 4 months ago
My husband is a sort of hoarder! He won't throw anything away when it's broken because he 'may' be able to fix it (he never does lol) The only rule I have is that none of his stuff gets put in the lounge! I need ONE room in the house that looks relatively normal!
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago
I once briefly dated a man who never would have worked out for several reasons….one being that I hated his house. It was crammed full of stuff. “Hoarder” does not even begin to describe it.
#23
How clean their kitchen is so I know if I'm safe to eat something they make or to avoid it now or in the future.
#24
Punch or kick holes in walls or doors, or signs of recent repairs of same.
Nice things, but in poor maintenance. Taking things for granted can mean an attitude that equals taking people for granted.
Leonard Henderson 4 months ago
Also indicates someone that can't control their temper. Red Flag!
Anthony Elmore 4 months ago
I'm gonna go ahead and say this one's a pretty shoddy red flag. Not taking care of their stuff is one thing, but a punch or kick hole in walls/doors looks just like a hole caused by any number of things. I've got a hole in my door right now from when I tripped and fell head-first into it. That's a yellow flag at worst, as I'm fairly clumsy and apparently the doors in my house are those cheap ones that are hollow on the inside and made from cheap wood.
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René Sauer 4 months ago
" sign of recent repairs" You know, they could have tripped and accidently put a hole into the wall.
Emilu 4 months ago
Certainly, but you should realise that this is also a sign of family violence if you don't already. Indeed, lots of abused people (I am loathe to say women because, whilst it is more common women get abused, so do men) will claim something like this to try and make it seem like "oh whoops! It just happened! Fancy that!" And sure, yes, it can and does just happen. Usually, though, there's more behind it. Maybe I've been working with FV victim/survivors too long and I'm just jaded, but if I had someone telling me that it'd set off red flags for me.
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Bi.Felicia 4 months ago
When I moved into my apartment, it was quite obvious that they had patched up a hole in my bedroom door. I'm now wondering if that has set off 🚩🚩 for anyone that has noticed it?
#25
A surprising number of people don't have soap by the kitchen sink. Soap with any sink really....should not be missing.
Emilu 4 months ago
I (stupidly, obviously) assumed having some sort of soap by the sink was a given.
Spocks's Mom 4 months ago
I am an a**l retentive freak that usually carries soap with me just for said occasion. Yes it happens.
Load More Replies... BookFanatic 4 months ago
What's wrong with using liquid dish soap? (Me, to my mother, when I got my first apartment and she came to visit)
Lisa Lilla 4 months ago
I wash my hands with the dish soap, plus it’s anti bacterial. I never though hand soap was considered essential, this all new for me….
Neb 4 months ago
It might be too harsh for skin - it is intended to break fat and dirt on dishes, not moisturize skin like the hand soaps.
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Saltypepper 4 months ago
I don't keep my soap right by the sink ,I'm done with it I put it under the sink
#26
He/Her still having photo frames of them with their exes/former partners.
Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
Ack, I need to fix that sentence. They still have framed photos of their exes. Whew, that's better.
Spocks's Mom 4 months ago (edited)
They still have framed photos of their exes former partners.* That makes it more interesting.
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#27
The bathroom. I personally think the state of the bathroom talks a lot about the personally of the owner.
BrownEyedGrrl 4 months ago
Years ago, I read an article about cleaning your house when you're expecting company. "The nastiest thing on earth is someone else's dirty bathroom."
Kipper 4 months ago
I have recently been ill and housework has been not a priority. My bathroom is dirty right now…my health comes first.
Emilu 4 months ago
I hope nobody expects you to have a perfectly clean house if you're unwell. I'm all too familiar with this, myself. Yeah, sorry; I've been in hospital. Housekeeping hasn't been my priority. Sue me.
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dan gerene 4 months ago (edited)
A floater with a toothpick and a little paper sail is really bad.
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GenericElder 4 months ago
Barbara Wilcock - I don't think any of these are "too judgemental". It's a list of personal red flags, so of course they're judgements - of the"where I draw the line" variety.
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#28
Too clean
Constant cleaning even when guests are present
Visibly upset if something is even slighty moved
Too dirty
Cat litter box full of feces and urine
Fresh and old urine spots from a dog
House smells like dirty or wet dogs or urine and feces
Too thin pets
Dirty mirrors
Dead house plants
Broken doors or cabinet doors
Lorius Interruptus 4 months ago
When it comes to personal well-being, it is absolutely Goldilocks, mate.
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Dog Mom to Zoe 4 months ago
I won't clean the kitchen while I have dinner guest. Dishes can wait. Your company deserves your attention.
Day Andie 4 months ago
That's me, but I'll wipe the table so we can lean our elbows on it and yack or play cards without having to watch out for crumbs. I may even do some dishes or load the dishwasher, but I'll be yacking and laughing and probably waving my hands dribbling soap froth, then have to wipe up the water on the floor. Friends can watch and don't have to help; friends that help probably get soap bubbles.
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KazzaHazza 4 months ago
Right, I feel attacked by the ‘Too Clean’ comments. I can’t stand clutter, I can’t stand to see mess, I have to tidy when I have friends round because it really sends me on edge to see plates, glasses etc building up. Luckily my friends know me and just let me get on with it and we chatter and have a laugh while I’m ‘pottering’. Maybe I’ve got a few wires loose that make me feel this way. Who knows. But I’d rather be happy pottering and still having a good evening with my friends than sitting there feeling on edge looking at a mess all night. After all, it is my house and I’ll keep it how I want.
#29
I analyze the books on their shelf.
theycallmecliff:
See, this is tough, because I have some books that I've bought specifically for the purposes of exploring philosophies contradictory to my own. I keep them in a box in storage because I don't want people to think that they're what I subscribe to.
But I think it's important to understand, for example, modern f*****t thinkers as a socialist because I want to know what they're appealing to and how to communicate with people that don't know as much about these things in general and how they might be tempted by strands of those ideas.
Emilu 4 months ago
I like to know what people like to read, what their interests are and also what they're interested in learning. Just because you own a book about Hitler doesn't mean you're quietly aspiring to be like him. Frankly, I'd rather see a bit of everything on someone's bookshelves then everything dedicated to the same thing.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 4 months ago (edited)
A person who was interested in history and politics (and also anti-fàscîst) might very well have a book about Hitler.
Load More Replies... Shane S 4 months ago
I have a Book of Mormon on my shelf as well as some other religious texts. Doesn’t mean I’m committed to a book. I will judge if every single book is written by a US Fox News anchor.
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago (edited)
Tao Te Ching next to Capital by Marx next to the Torah next to - well, anything really - indicates the bookshelf is mine, and you ain't gonna figure out anything from that. I've got three different Bibles here. You might get a bit further if you notice the works by Ursula Le Guin and Isaac Asimov (the latter notable for grabbing women by the bóob (for reasons of humour, so he seemed to claim), the former notable for writing the line "the king is pregnant"). My point is: it's hard to judge by the contents of bookshelves.
Auntriarch 4 months ago
If you have Le Guin and Asimov in your shelves I will judge you - as someone I can borrow books from!
Load More Replies... CartoonCasey 4 months ago
I have books of all subjects and I have to tell you: a book on the shelf with all of your other books is a book in context. It's public. A book in storage is a kept book not kept with the other books. People will wonder why. But they won't ask about it because it's going to be private.
#30
Pictures of the Pope all over the house but no pictures of the actual family.
#31
Any deceased relatives sitting in chairs or locked in display cabinets like taxidermy pieces.
#32
Years ago had a grindr date with a guy it all seemed kosher and when I showed up I had a bad feeling, couldn't place it. He tried to get handsy but I had to listen to that little internal voice so I decided I wanted to leave, let him know and went to use the bathroom before I went home. Wall to wall was covered in s**t, like it was spread everywhere, on white tiles and it smelt rancid. I still wonder if I was subtly picking up the smell on my bad nose but either case I legged it out of there. I still don't understand why or how and what signs I missed because we had talked for ages before meeting.
# That is now the red flag I look for. S**t on the walls.
Panda McPandaface 4 months ago
Are you judging him for meeting a Grindr date? Mind your own madam.
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#33
Firstly does it smell like cat p**s? Is anything rotting?
#34
Pee jars.
LobsterFar9876:
A guy at work we all hate told my bf that he’s to lazy to go downstairs to the bathroom at night so he pees in dr.pepper bottles and sh**s in a bucket and the pee bottles are all over his room because he wants to see how many he can fill.
TinkleTwinkleToes:
My former roommate was gross AF. My husband found the source of one of the smells were 3 fermenting pi*s bottles on the top shelf of his closet. He had his daughter stay over in his filth.
The bathroom was literally on the other side of his wall. Like, you open his door and the bathroom is literally 3 feet from his.
Auntriarch 4 months ago (edited)
Unless your "bathroom" is down a flight of stairs and in a small shed at the bottom of the garden, no excuses. And if it is, there are purpose made receptacles, chamber pots.
Liz Rutherford 4 months ago
My husband's brother pis*es in soda bottles because he's too lazy to get up and go to the toilet. And he wonders why he can't get a girlfriend.
Forrest Hobbs 4 months ago
I'm a man. It's a lot easier to move yourself to the appropriate room and pee there in the - oh! flushing toilet!, than go through the faff of "peeing in a bottle" and then, at a later time, dealing with the bottle. I'm a fat man too - but you know what? Fat as I might be, I can still trundle up and down stairs without any bother.
Load More Replies... #35
Any MLM products.
#36
If CNN or Fox News is playing on the TV.
GalPalAl 4 months ago
I have a friend whose husband is obsessed with news. The tv is always on with loud volume even when no one is in the room. I HATE news with a passion and they never turn it off even when guests come to visit. No bueno
Colleen Glim 4 months ago
I quit watching the news years ago. Nothing but doom and gloom. It was really affecting my own mental health
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Michael Largey 4 months ago
I prefer someone who signals virtue to one who actively attacks it.
Load More Replies... #37
No toilet paper.
Emilu 4 months ago (edited)
See, I don’t get this one (as in not having it, not it being a dealbreaker). What happens if you get caught on the fly? Do you use your hand or something? My toilet generally has towers of toilet paper because I’m paranoid about this.
Panda On My Balcony 3 months ago
Depends where you live. Many countries still use water not paper to clean up. Like a mini hosepipe attachment or a bidet in wealthy houses and a bucket in the corner in poorer ones.
Load More Replies... #38
I stopped eating @ my boyfriends bc their kitchen is ALWAYS dirty. Like, food on the floor dirty. I once used a cutting board for my lovely melon and it tasted LIKE ONION. They said oh yea its 'the vegetable cutting board'. I love to walk barefood, one time i stepped ON A PIECE OF MEAT. They are lovely people, the rest of the house is absolutely licked clean most of the time, but the kitchen just makes me wanna throw up. So thats a Red flag for me kinda
Also, if the house looks like no one lives in it. Like no personal items, no decoration, no nothing. Everything really sterile and stuff.
UKGrandad 4 months ago
Along with the earlobes and the battery terminals on her top lip.
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Anthony Elmore 4 months ago
Minimalism is an aesthetic style, not an excuse to not buy furniture. You can ALWAYS tell when someone appreciates minimalism as a style vs when they just didn't feel like populating their home with furniture.
Load More Replies... UKGrandad 4 months ago
That, the multiple boyfriends in the same house, and the floors being *licked* clean.
Load More Replies... Miracle Max 4 months ago
You really should have separate cutting boards for meat, veg, fruit etc. Of course, they should be cleaned after use!
#39
You should be able to smell your answer immediately.
Mreoww 4 months ago
I think (?) they mean that there must be any filthy smells wafting through the home?
Load More Replies... #40
Clean and reasonably tidy. Ideally no naked women displayed on the wall. That's really all I'm looking for.
Bored Trash Panda 4 months ago
I totally agree it makes a huge difference. Not sure why you got downvoted. I guess people don't get art.
Load More Replies... #41
A lock on the basement door.
#42
Having pin-up girls on his wall is a huge turnoff. Yes, there absolutely are men who still have these. Once you get out of college, you really need to switch your decor to something more tasteful and classy. Bare walls are not the best either, but they're far better than pin-up girls.
Grape Walls of Ire 4 months ago
Is that still a thing? No, it can't be. The OP must have just arrived from 1978.
Bored Trash Panda 4 months ago
I disagree with this one to a point. If they are classy vintage pin-ups like Bettie Page (I absolutely love her, even have a zombie pin up girl tattoo inspired by her) than that is cool. But if you have newer raunchy naked pics that's kinda ick.
Dav Carro-Ripalda 4 months ago
Well, i think there is history on the classic ones. I come from the last XX th century, and I like them. And i do not considered myself tasteless.
#43
My former roommate had a sign that said “don’t give the whores d***s” so maybe something along those lines.
Day Andie 4 months ago
Hmm, I thought it was a pun. And then I thought you're right, it was a DE. And then I thought no, but.... And then I looked it up: "A double entendre uses a word that seems innocuous at the surface level but also carries a second meaning that would be too inappropriate or sexually suggestive to state directly. On the other hand, a pun also exploits two possible interpretations of a word, but it is usually in a clever or humorous way, without any suggestive meaning. In short, a double entendre may use a pun. However, not all puns are considered double entendres." But I disagree with that, because many, many puns are sexually suggestive. So I think it's both a pun and a double entendre, except that your comment sounds all high-falutin' s**y and French.
Load More Replies... CartoonCasey 4 months ago
That is an infamous joke sign from the 60s/70s/80s. My friend has it up in his house. Everybody that happens upon the sign has a slight giggle and then, they move on. They have never taken offense or expressed outrage. Probably because we're older than dirt and stopped being concerned with signage.
Rachel Pelz 4 months ago
Sorry, what do the asterixes hide here? Substances or genitalia or something else altogether?
#44
Roaches.
Emilu 4 months ago
To be fair, these aren't always the person's fault. If you're unlucky for them to pick your place to nest, then... well, you'll have roaches. It doesn't have to be because of cleanliness (or lack thereof).
CD Mills 3 months ago
We get waves of them during the hottest months but we have several baits and traps set out so we knock them down quickly. They aren't coming in for food/filth, they are coming in for the cool. They never get a foothold.
Load More Replies... Lady Eowyn 4 months ago
Sometimes in apartment buildings your neighbors aren't as clean as you are. Roaches come through the walls.
NotAThreat (he/him) 4 months ago
ok, sometimes u can't control them, my mums not dirty, she was in survival mode from a bad ex and has been trying to get rid of them for a good while :(
Annabelle 4 months ago
I'm so sorry, NotAThreat. I can't imagine how much stress that adds to what she is recovering from.❤️🩹 I'm glad she got away.
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#45
Locks on the outside of interior bedroom doors.
marianne eliza 4 months ago (edited)
With one exception. If a pet, usually a cat, has figured out how to open doors, then the lock on the outside of the door is the only safe way to secure a forbidden room. Have one on my pantry door, and brother has one on his wine cellar door and pantry door. Some cats are too smart. Even my orange one. He's bogarting the brain cell.
René Sauer 4 months ago
I have never seen a door that doesn´t have a kind of lock, except maybe sliding doors.
#46
Skid marks in the toilet.
Day Andie 4 months ago
Oh, come on. If the toilet is flushed, and the bathroom is otherwise clean, can't you forgive a little skiddy? It's going to soak off and disappear with the next flush. Who among us hasn't left a skid upon occasion and then forgot to go back for a second flush before answering the door for unexpected company?
#47
Literal trash just sitting around. My first bfs house had pop cans just sitting around on a desk and on their kitchen island and then their entire kitchen stove was so gross I didn’t even want to eat off anything they made. Then one time I found cat poop just hanging out in their living room 🤢 that relationship didn’t last long.
#48
I went on a date recently with this girl. Went on a few. On the last one we got to her place and lo and behold - Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler was on her shelves. No no, not just one. A full f*****g bookshelf. I couldn't get myself to f**k her. "Giving this woman any pleasure would be a crime to humanity" is what I thought in the moment. I was in there for like 10 more mins after noticing it and then adressed the issue. She was a full on n**i. Too bad cuzz she was hot as f**k.
Thee8thsense 4 months ago
I have a friend who was in bed for the first time with a woman he liked. As he flipped her around for some doggie style, he was appalled to see a giant n@zi tramp stamp. End of the date, needless to say.
#49
Porcelain Dolls.
I know I'm not getting out alive.
#50
Hobbies may be underrated when it comes to a partner but I have found it informational. People who have hobbies, interests of their own tells you they don't spend all of their time trying to go out and get attention from the opposite s*x. They don't have the time or energy if they have hobbies and or interests. So look around for artsy stuff, maybe collections or things they've made or places they've been. What matters to them outside if dating.
TheGreaterDebater 4 months ago
Holy 𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚝 now hobbies are red flags now? Is enjoying life a red flag? Is having an interest in things "wrong?" 𝚏𝚞𝚌𝚔 𝚘𝚏𝚏!
Roxy222uk 4 months ago
No, the OP is saying that hobbies are a green flag. I don’t know why they’re on this list. I don’t get the impression they’re saying not having a hobby is a red flag. Maybe an amber one?
Load More Replies... #51
I was once invited to a guy’s house that scared the c**p out of me. It was actually a stunning mansion. He said he had lived there for almost a year but it was nearly empty — and he shared custody of his 5 year old son! The son’s room was only slightly less austere than the rest of the house.
He took me on a full tour which was odd because it was so huge yet so empty, so he basically showed me a bunch of empty rooms. He even opened his closet which was fairly full, but only three colors - black white and beige - arranged by color. He opened the pantry which was also fairly full, and I swear it was arranged by color too.
His son’s room rose the austerity to a creepy level.
But … the house was clean. It was super clean. And clean is always excellent. Creepy is not so good though.
#52
As a person with ADHD, if your house is messy, same bro. Only God can judge. The only red flag is a jumping dog. Like a big, giant dog jumping on you with giant claws. Freaks me out.
#55
A red flag would be to find female clothing in a closet when he said he lived alone.
Emilu 4 months ago
A red flag unless it actually fits him (IMO. I know cross-dressing isn't for everyone).
Leonard Henderson 4 months ago
Amusingly, of course, as only men can cross-dress as women, it is literally the most masculine activity possible.
Load More Replies... #56
Things covered in dust.
Now of course I'm not saying your normal layer that most clean.
I'm talking hasn't been touched in months, not even a fingerprint on the surface.
Lady Eowyn 4 months ago
If I don't disturb the dust, it won't disturb me. Kidding, I've got allergies so I dust a lot but boy do things get dusty here fast!
Panda McPandaface 4 months ago
According to Quentin Crisp, "after the first four years, the dust dosn't get any worse."
#57
Comforting- good bedding, several pillows, nice sheets, bedside table available for my s**t, clean bathroom
Red flags- old mattress, dirty toilet, roll not on the roll, s****y pillows.
#58
Underware hanging from the curtain rod in the front window.
Emilu 4 months ago (edited)
I'm not normally a spelling pedant on the net, but spelling 'underwear' like that would personally be a red flag. I'm sorry.
UKGrandad 4 months ago (edited)
Never apologise for having standards. EDIT: Downvoted, really? So now having standards is wrong? Do you morons even think about what you're saying about yourselves?
Load More Replies... #59
The pictures they have displayed. Pictures with ex’s? Huge amount of pictures of them partying/beer and liquor bottles displayed? Large amount of pictures with family/mom (possible indicator that their mom’s views will always take precedent over yours).
Auntriarch 4 months ago
I've got a rather big collage of pictures of our first dog. Mr Auntriarch and I are in some of them
#60
Lack of personal touches, like no photos of family or friends. Otherwise, your partner could be crashing in someone else's home and passing it off as theirs. Surprisingly common in the Airbnb age.
#61
I like if he’s made his bed. If it’s unmade I feel like I’m dealing with a college kid and that’s tough. There are always allowances and I don’t make my bed every day either, but mostly it’s a turn off.
Vexed Panda 4 months ago
I make my bed every morning. My dog's fave game is to undo that. Top speed so far is under three minutes. Not a huge deal since nobody else will ever be in that room, though. Guests get the wicked cool forest reading nook.
Miracle Max 4 months ago
Don't make your bed! The well-made bed: an unappreciated public health risk https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC99181/
Marissa Voleta 4 months ago
"Messy bed, messy head". Said it once when my husband and I were dating. He's never forgotten...
#62
I don’t look for red flags, I try not to judge or anything. But i suppose a “red flag” for me would be the difference in cleanliness of the doors around the door handle and the countertops.
#64
An entire wall of professionall shot and framed photos of their family. Bonus points if you spot a crusifix and a 'live, laugh, love' sign in the mix.
LooseSeal's $10 Banana 4 months ago
Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but having well done photos of your family on the wall seems like a green flag. Or at least neutral.
Emilu 4 months ago
Maybe it’s the number of them the poster’s referring to? I’m not sure. I don’t get it either.
Load More Replies... Matt from Canada 4 months ago
So we're now against family and signs about love? Some of y'all really do need Jesus
#65
How rigid is the style of their decor and furnishings, and does it seem compatible with yours? Do they have a hodgepodge of dishes, or is everything in the house blue & white China? The latter isn't a red flag if you're the same way, but in a LTR they might be challenging when it comes to cohabitation or compromising on esthetics.
Lorius Interruptus 4 months ago
Methinks there's a big difference between red flag and incompatible. 🤷♀️
Emilu 4 months ago (edited)
The hodgepodge of different stuff kinda screams “just moved out” to me. Not that that’s a problem or anything bad; just it’s what I’d automatically assume.
BrownEyedGrrl 4 months ago
The hodgepodge might just mean they're eclectic.
Load More Replies... #66
Great question! I personally am instantly repelled when I walk into a dudes place and see “Terrible Towel” curtains. Actually, any Steelers gear is a show stopper for me, my experience with these items and their owners just left an imprint on me and so…no.
A schnauzer. Any untrained dog. Anything that indicates his favorite place to eat is QDoba. Signage that says “no smoking” as if the occupant of the home is one of those super Intolerant types who exaggeratedly coughs and chokes if they see a person smoking in public. No paper towels. No curtains on windows.
Oh! But this actually happened to me once. Went to a guys house. Being a late night person I went over at like 4 am and we were hanging out and at 6 am sharp all electrical functions in his apt switched completely off. Turned out that he had rerouted the apartment bldg outside lighting’s wiring to supply electricity to a couple power strips hanging out of holes in the wall by the front door. He hadn't paid his power bill in a year, and the outside lighting was…you guessed it…solar deactivated and turned off by the rising sun. Turned out he was, unsurprisingly, also a seasoned m*th coinesseur who liked to watch p**n in front of females he wanted to woo. No f**king thanks man.
#67
Stinky, not clean smell.
Nothing in the fridge but beer and condiments.
No plants.
Evidence of a ladies’ influence or presence.
Someone over the age of 30 that looks like their place is still decorated in the style of I-just-moved-out-of-my-parents-house.
Barbara Wilcock 4 months ago
Good lord. Get a life. I love plants,but im not going batshit crazy if they don't have them
GenericElder 4 months ago
Barbara Wilcock, I think you've had enough internet tonight. Hope you feel better in the morning.
Load More Replies... Emilu 4 months ago (edited)
I have three inside plants. One is probably dying, the other two were specifically recommended to me by a plant-loving friend whose words were, quote, “you have to work to k**l these things”. And it’s true. I don’t think I’ve watered them for months and they’re not dead yet. But yeah, black thumb here. 😆
Load More Replies... Miracle Max 4 months ago
My fridge contents can be pretty random, as I like popping off to the store every couple of days. And I travel frequently and hate to leave too much in there!
#68
No decorations or pictures.
#69
Toilets that don’t flush. Cops will cut the water before a raid so you can’t flush your stash.
Matt from Canada 4 months ago
Red flag: People who know the cops will cut the water before a raid so you can't flush your stash
cecilia kilian 4 months ago
Perhaps the OP has friends or family in law enforcement?
Load More Replies... john doe 4 months ago
Cops don't cut the water before a raid, it takes a crew of workers to go find the water main valve, sometimes you need to dig it up and physically shut the water off. Cops would not want that happening while they are getting ready for a raid. Shutting water off isn't a flip of a switch. I don't know where people think this stuff up honestly.
john doe 4 months ago
Also a toilet would still flush if the water was turned off, the toilet tank would still be full
Load More Replies... #70
I like to see a tidy room with things generally organized, the bathroom cleaned and the fridge with more than condiments. Bonus points for good neutral not overbearing purposeful smell in the room. I remember going to my now husbands apartment and noting not much in the fridge and the bathroom not exceptionally clean...nothing gross just not well attended to. I gave him the benefit of the doubt...guess who does not cook or clean...this remains a huge inequity in my relationship. Cooking and cleaning are essential life tasks; do it for yourself, when you have a sleepover and when you have a partner.
WalterWhiteSavannah 4 months ago
How does it take until marriage to realize he doesn't cook or clean? Like you had to know that before getting to the marriage point, unless he used to and just stopped, but it doesn't sound like that was the case.
#71
Cats in the kitchen. I like cats, I just won’t eat anything you’ve made.
Clutter and disarray - like no space on the sofa because it’s got laundry and debris on it. I won’t want to sit down.
General dirt - you can tell a house which is cleaned regularly, it could look like a complete mess with toys all over the place but there’s a difference in a place which is a mess because of lives lived, and somewhere which is NEVER tidied or cleaned.
I grew up with a chaotic family environment which was never cleaned enough and that’s had an effect on how I live my life now, and dirt and mess really makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. I would never spend any time with someone who lived life like that.
Barbara Wilcock 4 months ago
And this is why you don't have friends. Nobody wants you in their house
Liserhawkie80 4 months ago
How do you keep cats out of the kitchen? I'm guessing they mean on the counters.
WalterWhiteSavannah 4 months ago
"I like cats" no the f**k you don't or you'd realize cats go where they d**n well please. How on earth does on keep a cat out of a specific room besides a bathroom or bedroom? (ive very rarely seen a kitchen with doors).
#72
What direction they face their toilet paper roll.
Liserhawkie80 4 months ago
Good god. It's all going to the same place, between the cheeks and in the sewer....who cares?
#73
Animals, state of cleanliness, furniture, and how their fridge is filled or not.
#74
Wearing your shoes indoors 🚩.
XenoMurph 4 months ago
Where I grew up it would be an insult to be asked to remove your shoes indoors. Where i currently live it's the custom. Now I can't imagine not removing my dirty outdoor footwear in someone's home.
Load More Replies... #75
1. Slovenliness - Dirty bathroom, closet on the floor, crusty towels, lack of ownership of common household necessities like sheets. Do yourself a favor and only date housebroken people.
2. Signs of a partner that is not you - beauty/bath products, pictures on the fridge, decorations that seem to reflect someone other than the partner (Usually goes hand-in-hand with "your" partner being unavailable for odd stretches of time). Um, yeah. Run.
3. Signs of terminal singlehood - A 72 inch TV, one recliner and a table with lotion on it, p**n/ s*x toys within view in the living room/bathroom, etc. Chances are this person will not be good at navigating partner issues.
4. Signs of substance abuse - 5 cases of Busch Light, 4 vodka bottles, 3 m**h pipes, two dirty bongs? Not a partner in a pair tree.
5. Signs of massive expenditures/misplaced priorities - A person with a $20k collection of toys, electronics, clothing who only owns 1 pan and eats off paper plates. You don't want to join forces with someone who will buy a life-sized Darth Vader or $800 pair of shoes before they pay the rent.
Matt from Canada 4 months ago
Red flag: someone with this many specific red flags. Dating this lady would be a misplaced priority. Full stop.
Emilu 4 months ago
#5 is a bit judgy. I’ve explained previously on here why I sometimes use paper plates. I also have a massive (and expensive) handbag collection from when I was well and could work more. And guess what, poster? I also own my home and pay my bills before spending more frivolously. For a first date where you aren’t likely to know the person’s financial situation, there are a lot of assumptions here.
#76
Butcher knives outside of the kitchen. An exception can be made for this time of. Year because it might be a gift that just hasn't been put away, but a mid-summer butcher knife in the bathroom is a red flag. Especially if it's.. red.
XenoMurph 4 months ago
It's slightly lighter than the Autumn/Winter knife. Maybe with a gentle floral motif
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What do you think ?
Emilu 4 months ago
I get obviously red flags are a personal thing, but some of these just seemed petty. No plants? Yeah, you self-select yourself out of my dating pool, please and thank you.
Rick Murray 4 months ago
I have several acres outside, why would I bother with a plant inside? 🤷🏻♀️
Load More Replies... Daya Meyer 4 months ago
What is it with those urine filled bottles? I mean if you use a bottles for whatever reason, okay. But why should someone collect them like trophies?
Little Bit 4 months ago
My biggest red flag would be someone who locks all the doors when you've entered the house, meaning you would have to ask to leave.
Angela C 4 months ago
Most locks you don't need a key to unlock from the inside
Load More Replies... Rachel Reynolds 4 months ago
My best friend went home with a guy after, what she said was a really nice date, only to find a Real Doll sitting up in the living room "watching" TV. She noped out of there and I would have too.
UKGrandad 4 months ago
It might have been a trick to fool burglars into thinking someone was home 😇
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 4 months ago
Here's one I was expecting - "You go over to his place and find yourself standing in his mother's basement".
marianne eliza 4 months ago
I think if you culled all the dirty house entries down to just one, this list would be more interesting.
CartoonCasey 4 months ago
I thought that 'racist/bigot' entries would dominate this edition of the red flag articles, especially when one of those entries was a literal red flag with a swastika. But the actual topic with the most entries is the 'weird s**t' with 12 entries ranging from dolls to photos of their ex to pictures of the pope. The strangest and most unique entry is the collection of dead people. 10 entries for unsanitary, which is different than just plain dirty with 6 entries. Then there are the 8 entries of unsafe conditions which include sketchy locks or cameras. I did not include the full scale p**n studio entry which deserves to be called out of from the rest of the crowd because WOW.
Emilu 4 months ago
I get obviously red flags are a personal thing, but some of these just seemed petty. No plants? Yeah, you self-select yourself out of my dating pool, please and thank you.
Rick Murray 4 months ago
I have several acres outside, why would I bother with a plant inside? 🤷🏻♀️
Load More Replies... Daya Meyer 4 months ago
What is it with those urine filled bottles? I mean if you use a bottles for whatever reason, okay. But why should someone collect them like trophies?
Little Bit 4 months ago
My biggest red flag would be someone who locks all the doors when you've entered the house, meaning you would have to ask to leave.
Angela C 4 months ago
Most locks you don't need a key to unlock from the inside
Load More Replies... Rachel Reynolds 4 months ago
My best friend went home with a guy after, what she said was a really nice date, only to find a Real Doll sitting up in the living room "watching" TV. She noped out of there and I would have too.
UKGrandad 4 months ago
It might have been a trick to fool burglars into thinking someone was home 😇
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 4 months ago
Here's one I was expecting - "You go over to his place and find yourself standing in his mother's basement".
marianne eliza 4 months ago
I think if you culled all the dirty house entries down to just one, this list would be more interesting.
CartoonCasey 4 months ago
I thought that 'racist/bigot' entries would dominate this edition of the red flag articles, especially when one of those entries was a literal red flag with a swastika. But the actual topic with the most entries is the 'weird s**t' with 12 entries ranging from dolls to photos of their ex to pictures of the pope. The strangest and most unique entry is the collection of dead people. 10 entries for unsanitary, which is different than just plain dirty with 6 entries. Then there are the 8 entries of unsafe conditions which include sketchy locks or cameras. I did not include the full scale p**n studio entry which deserves to be called out of from the rest of the crowd because WOW.
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