They think sleep is for the weak and they don't wanna be weak OR they know falling asleep in front of a loved one is rude and they don't want to be rude to their loved one

It's satisfying. Try it.

for prevented them to stick to their skin

Because 'in their day' they didn't have to use no stinkin' GPS

They exhausted

This is the "at ease" pose that many servicemen are used to. He's relaxed but observant.

Because they do not want some fancy s**t. They ask what they need.

Well I'm not a dad but I do take grilling or any kind of meat cooking seriously. I mean the animal had to die so you can eat it, the least you can do to respect that, is being really focused on making it really delicious :D

Back pain, mostly

It hides our terrible handwriting.

I think I´m a Dad then... ^^

because silence is golden when you have kids.

Because most food dates are arbitrary

we mentally stop ageing around 18.

because we don't have purses.

Because Homer Simpson started it.

To make room for the desserts.

Why do kids always have to pee as soon as the car moves?

Dumb question. Answer - Easier to get out, easier to load/ unload the trunk when it isn't facing traffic, Dads don't see it as a special showy thing, just an obvious thing to do.

Do you have change in your purse?

Not just dads do this ...

Dad jokes are our God given right and we are going to use them.

The mirrors and seat clearly need to be adjusted, because the car is so badly parked they need to move it.

Put a jumper on, save the world/wallet

Is it an Irish Setter? I talk to Scottish Terriers in a Scottish accent.

They are showing self restraint, they know they will accidentally keep any pen they accept

Free

Never! Why do wife and kids always have theirs on silent and miss every message a dad sends?

Because they would look silly in a Hello Kitty shirt.