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User submission
Hey Pandas, AITA For Refusing To Cover Full Rent After Someone Slept In My Room?
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If you find yourself disagreeing with this person’s actions, we encourage you not to downvote the post. Instead, kindly express your opinions in the comments. We recommend maintaining politeness and articulating your thoughts with well-constructed arguments.
At college, I (F) lived in an apartment with four other students (two girls and two boys). They shared rooms two and two (boys in one, girls in another), and I had my own room, paying a higher price for it. They each had a single bed, and I had a double bed. We all had a great time during the first year. I always left the flat and went to my hometown every weekend. Sometimes I was gone from the apartment from Thursday until Monday.
One Monday, I came back to my room, and it felt weird
Image credits: Bernd 📷 Dittrich (not the actual photo)
Some things were on the floor. I didn’t remember knocking them over, but I thought, “Okay, maybe I knocked them with my suitcase when leaving for home in a hurry.” However, every time I left my room and came back, it smelled strange. I started doubting my senses and sanity (the knocked-over things and the smell).
As I was about to lie down for an afternoon nap (I had woken up at 3 a.m. that day), I saw an earring
Image credits: Image generated by Bored Panda using ChatGPT (not the actual photo)
Not mine. I only have one set that I wear all the time. I jumped out of bed and screamed, because it all made sense. One of the flatmates had used my room and my bed for a one-night stand. I went nuts, because I knew the earrings didn’t belong to any of the girls in the apartment.
I went to confront one of the male flatmates. I knew who it wasn’t and who it was
Image credits: Vitaly Gariev (not the actual photo)
He was drunk as hell and just laughed about it. I went crazy and yelled at him. I called the landlord, explaining what happened and that I would pay the normal rate for a shared room, since this flatmate had used my room. I told the flatmate he would have to pay the extra for my room before calling the landlord. He just laughed it off.
This whole incident happened about four months before I was set to move out. I ended up paying the landlord for three full months for the single room and one month for the shared room (50% less), and I told the flatmate (who had used my room) to pay the remaining. To this day, I don’t know if he ever paid. I am no longer in any kind of contact with him.
Expert’s Advice
You set clear boundaries, advocated for yourself, and held someone accountable for violating your personal space—those are healthy and assertive actions. It’s understandable to feel anger and betrayal; those emotions are valid. Moving forward, focus on letting go of resentment toward someone you no longer see. Holding onto it only prolongs the stress. Use this experience as a reminder of the importance of boundaries, communication, and self-respect—skills that will serve you well in every relationship and living situation.
Moderator’s note
Please note that the images included in this article are for illustrative purposes only and do not represent the actual individuals or items discussed in the story.
If you have a comparable experience or story you’d like to tell, we welcome your submissions. Click here to share your story with Bored Panda.
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What do you think ?
FreeTheUnicorn 1 month ago
Totally inappropriate to hookup in someone else's room, but you still have to pay your rent. At most you could claim flatmate owes 1/30th to you. Unless the landlord somehow facilitated or encouraged the flatmate using your room, it's not legally or ethically their issue. Sounds like a great time to look for other places or other flatmates depending on the lease specifics. If you're in the UK, and you have a separate lease from your flatmates you can put a lock on your door, or you may already have one. Use it.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Sorry, while I do think it is entirely unacceptable for any of your roommates to have used your room and/or slept on your bed, legally you don't get to NOT pay your full month's rent just because that happened. Can you imagine saying to your landlord, "John and some girl had sèx on my bed while I was visiting my parents' house. I'm not paying my rent this month." It sucks, it's gross, and it's not cool that they did it, but you ARE still responsible for the full rent you agreed to. YTA for sticking someone else with that bill.
Hayhaypaula 1 month ago
Should have just charged your flatmate the average cost for a room rental at a nice clean hotel, for each time you came home to find your room had been used!
Apatheist Account2 1 month ago
As Judge Judy often says: If your stuff is there, you're living there, so you pay rent for the full month, no question. The only time you don't is if the landlord prevents you from living there - either with a legal order or by changing the locks.
TCW Sam Vimes 1 month ago
Yuck. I'd have done more than just ask for money. That's such an invasion of privacy and steamroll over any boundaries...
Lyone Fein 1 month ago
If your agreement is with the landlord directly, then you have to pay your rent unless the landlord violates the terms of the lease. If your agreement is with your apartment mates, this is different. If the group of tenants agreed to split the rent in a particular way, based on room usage, and then one of the other tenants changes their room usage by imposing on the space you are paying for then you have a case against the other renter.
FreeTheUnicorn 1 month ago
Totally inappropriate to hookup in someone else's room, but you still have to pay your rent. At most you could claim flatmate owes 1/30th to you. Unless the landlord somehow facilitated or encouraged the flatmate using your room, it's not legally or ethically their issue. Sounds like a great time to look for other places or other flatmates depending on the lease specifics. If you're in the UK, and you have a separate lease from your flatmates you can put a lock on your door, or you may already have one. Use it.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Sorry, while I do think it is entirely unacceptable for any of your roommates to have used your room and/or slept on your bed, legally you don't get to NOT pay your full month's rent just because that happened. Can you imagine saying to your landlord, "John and some girl had sèx on my bed while I was visiting my parents' house. I'm not paying my rent this month." It sucks, it's gross, and it's not cool that they did it, but you ARE still responsible for the full rent you agreed to. YTA for sticking someone else with that bill.
Hayhaypaula 1 month ago
Should have just charged your flatmate the average cost for a room rental at a nice clean hotel, for each time you came home to find your room had been used!
Apatheist Account2 1 month ago
As Judge Judy often says: If your stuff is there, you're living there, so you pay rent for the full month, no question. The only time you don't is if the landlord prevents you from living there - either with a legal order or by changing the locks.
TCW Sam Vimes 1 month ago
Yuck. I'd have done more than just ask for money. That's such an invasion of privacy and steamroll over any boundaries...
Lyone Fein 1 month ago
If your agreement is with the landlord directly, then you have to pay your rent unless the landlord violates the terms of the lease. If your agreement is with your apartment mates, this is different. If the group of tenants agreed to split the rent in a particular way, based on room usage, and then one of the other tenants changes their room usage by imposing on the space you are paying for then you have a case against the other renter.
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