Women Share 12 Tricks They Use For Creepy Men That Ask For Number And Don’t Understand ‘No’
Some people don’t know the meaning of the word “no.” And that makes them incredibly hard to deal with. Luckily, tumblr user daree-to-dream — who has had her share of creepy encounters — decided to share some of the tricks she uses when annoying creeps ask for their phone number. When you think about it, it’s sad that things like this are necessary in the first place, but you never know when you might need them. Better safe than sorry, right?
Image credits: daree-to-dream
Image credits: daree-to-dream
Keep in mind that it’s perfectly normal if you do not wish to give out your number. Even if you simply don’t feel like doing it. That doesn’t make you stuck up or rude, after all, you’re an autonomous human being and that includes deciding who gets to be in contact with you.
The post quickly went viral, generating nearly 85,000 notes on tumblr
Image credits: daree-to-dream
In a paper published in New Ideas in Psychology, two researchers from Knox College tried to outline a more comprehensible definition of creepiness. After doing an empirical study, they concluded that a person’s “creepiness detector” pings when they encounter something unpredictable or outside the norm. For example, someone with idiosyncratic behavioral patterns, unusual physical characteristics, or a tendency to over or under-emote. To put it simply, we get a weird vibe when someone looks or behaves in a way that appears unstable or violates social norms. Usually, because we believe they may pose danger to us.
The researchers got their data from an international online survey of 1,341 people with an average age of just under 30. Participants rated the likelihood of a creepy person enacting 44 different behaviors and one of the top-ranked behaviors was habitually steering the conversations toward sex.
Eventually, people started sharing other ways to get our of the difficult situation
I was once really close to interfer after a man asked a teen her number at the bus station. He didn"t understand the "no" and was insisting until he said "but why won't you give me your phone number? I asked nicely!" But she answered "Oh your shirt is beautiful! can I blow my nose on it?" When he said "no" with an horrified face she added "but I asked nicely!" He left without a word and I'm still laughing when I think of her nice comeback.
Best.Answer.Ever! *slow clap*
That young woman will go places in life!
Brilliant! Using his own logic to demonstrate how it is flawed.
This girl is going places!!!! LOVE IT!!!
I'm going to have to remember this one! That was pure perfection.
Instead of giving women tips on how to avoid creeps who won't take "No" for an answer, we should focus on teaching men not to behave like this, and creating better police responses to these situations (i.e. no more asking a woman how she was dressed, actually testing rape kits, etc.)
Until the world becomes perfect, everyone still needs to know how to,protect themselves. Even with education and training, their will be predators and people who just Do. Not. Care
I agree that we need to know how to protect ourselves, but right now it's far more common to see women being advised on how to protect ourselves and rare to see men advised on how to act respectfully to women. Even well-intentioned, polite dudes might not realize, for example, that something they're doing is scary to women because they just aren't aware of our mindset of constantly watching out for violence. Or worse, we as a society don't condemn rape (just read about the Brock Turner case) and make it the woman's responsibility to avoid rape (Watch your drink, Don't go out alone) and not the man's responsibility to not commit rape.
I agree. And as I said few times on this subject - 1) it doesn't matter if you go jogging every day or if you practice some martial art. Krav maga is popular, very efective and it usually doesn't cost much. 2) self defence tools are quite cheap and can be disguised as jewelery. 3) when you will get something for self defence, practice with it. You have at least one friend who is willing to help you or you can ask in local gym if is there somebody who will help you. Also policemen are sometimes willing to help you with tips and tricks how to use tasers, stunguns, battons, etc and train with you. I was training with my wife and now I'm damn sure that if she will be ever attacked by somebody with knife or batton whe will not be the one who will be hurt.
@Marnee DeRider - I know this probably won't get to you because I can't write it as a reply, but here goes. Someone asking for your number isn't a predator. If they ask you over and over, if they don't take no for an answer, if they won't leave you alone, if they are making you feel uncomfortable, then they are being predators. One definition of 'predator' is an animal that hunts, kills, and eats other animals, like wolves, and lions. Another is someone who follows people in order to harm them or commit a crime against them, like a sexual predator. So it can be an apt description.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
@Catlady6000: So, a guy asking for a number is a predator? (Also, you do know that "predator" is an animal that kills in order to eat. It's not a very apt description of a person who does violence and makes it a joke.)
You can't control other people, only yourself
This advice is for other people though. It’s from one person to another.
Trina, duh! As parents, teachers, older siblings etc., we should be teaching men how to be respectful, intelligent citizens. We shouldn't have to focus on advising women how to deal w socially inept assholes. And yes, this is broader than men and women. Women can be inappropriate with men. Men and women can be inappropriate in homosexual relationships. We need to teach our children how to be respectful and considerate, how to accept "no"as a complete sentence, no explanation required.
I know what you are saying but by that logic we wouldn't discourage anyone from engaging in criminal/abusive behaviour as we would only focus on avoiding being victimized, which clearly isn't a good way for the world to run. So obviously as a society and as parents, teachers etc. we do need to be developing correct behaviour.
Great response! Thank you!
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!
We should do that too, but I think there will always be men (and women) like this.
Agreed, but some perfectly nice guys may come across as weird--it's not a science. A woman can say she doesn't give out her number to strangers, but it's okay if he wants to give her his.
There will only be creeps. It's sad, but that's the way it is. It's better to teach girls and boys how to be safe than teach them they live in a utopia where everybody is nice and bad things don't happen.
Good luck with that
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
So, men seeking a mate is bad behavior? What is wrong with asking for a number. The title implies that this is a problem only with creepy guys who won't understand 'No', but the text says nothing about actually saying 'no'. And seriously, how often do women get "gutted" over saying no? Seriously, are women afraid of being murdered over stuff like this? They need to stop watching so many movies. (I understand that there might be a specific situation in which there might be some fear involved..late night and no one around...but usually that's not the case.) Say, "No, sorry." You are NOT REQUIRED to give a reason, but there is no need to be rude right off the bat. If they don't take 'no' for an answer, say "I said 'no'." And then don't talk to them any more. Completely ignore them.
My dad is in forensics. Do you REALLY want to know how many women (CIS and Trans) get gutted? There is a list that is read in November of people killed. I could send that to you, if you like.
Women get attacked for saying no all the time. It might be nice to pretend that it's only in movies but that just isn't the truth. This is just the most recent one that I heard of: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-baby-shot-fresno-party-20190624-story.html%3foutputType=amp
Or just read JP's comment below
Tell the guy you had 5 kids in 5 years and all are under the age of 6. All guys run from that. Enjoy your evening
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Not if they just want to fuck.
I was once really close to interfer after a man asked a teen her number at the bus station. He didn"t understand the "no" and was insisting until he said "but why won't you give me your phone number? I asked nicely!" But she answered "Oh your shirt is beautiful! can I blow my nose on it?" When he said "no" with an horrified face she added "but I asked nicely!" He left without a word and I'm still laughing when I think of her nice comeback.
Best.Answer.Ever! *slow clap*
That young woman will go places in life!
Brilliant! Using his own logic to demonstrate how it is flawed.
This girl is going places!!!! LOVE IT!!!
I'm going to have to remember this one! That was pure perfection.
Instead of giving women tips on how to avoid creeps who won't take "No" for an answer, we should focus on teaching men not to behave like this, and creating better police responses to these situations (i.e. no more asking a woman how she was dressed, actually testing rape kits, etc.)
Until the world becomes perfect, everyone still needs to know how to,protect themselves. Even with education and training, their will be predators and people who just Do. Not. Care
I agree that we need to know how to protect ourselves, but right now it's far more common to see women being advised on how to protect ourselves and rare to see men advised on how to act respectfully to women. Even well-intentioned, polite dudes might not realize, for example, that something they're doing is scary to women because they just aren't aware of our mindset of constantly watching out for violence. Or worse, we as a society don't condemn rape (just read about the Brock Turner case) and make it the woman's responsibility to avoid rape (Watch your drink, Don't go out alone) and not the man's responsibility to not commit rape.
I agree. And as I said few times on this subject - 1) it doesn't matter if you go jogging every day or if you practice some martial art. Krav maga is popular, very efective and it usually doesn't cost much. 2) self defence tools are quite cheap and can be disguised as jewelery. 3) when you will get something for self defence, practice with it. You have at least one friend who is willing to help you or you can ask in local gym if is there somebody who will help you. Also policemen are sometimes willing to help you with tips and tricks how to use tasers, stunguns, battons, etc and train with you. I was training with my wife and now I'm damn sure that if she will be ever attacked by somebody with knife or batton whe will not be the one who will be hurt.
@Marnee DeRider - I know this probably won't get to you because I can't write it as a reply, but here goes. Someone asking for your number isn't a predator. If they ask you over and over, if they don't take no for an answer, if they won't leave you alone, if they are making you feel uncomfortable, then they are being predators. One definition of 'predator' is an animal that hunts, kills, and eats other animals, like wolves, and lions. Another is someone who follows people in order to harm them or commit a crime against them, like a sexual predator. So it can be an apt description.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
@Catlady6000: So, a guy asking for a number is a predator? (Also, you do know that "predator" is an animal that kills in order to eat. It's not a very apt description of a person who does violence and makes it a joke.)
You can't control other people, only yourself
This advice is for other people though. It’s from one person to another.
Trina, duh! As parents, teachers, older siblings etc., we should be teaching men how to be respectful, intelligent citizens. We shouldn't have to focus on advising women how to deal w socially inept assholes. And yes, this is broader than men and women. Women can be inappropriate with men. Men and women can be inappropriate in homosexual relationships. We need to teach our children how to be respectful and considerate, how to accept "no"as a complete sentence, no explanation required.
I know what you are saying but by that logic we wouldn't discourage anyone from engaging in criminal/abusive behaviour as we would only focus on avoiding being victimized, which clearly isn't a good way for the world to run. So obviously as a society and as parents, teachers etc. we do need to be developing correct behaviour.
Great response! Thank you!
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!
We should do that too, but I think there will always be men (and women) like this.
Agreed, but some perfectly nice guys may come across as weird--it's not a science. A woman can say she doesn't give out her number to strangers, but it's okay if he wants to give her his.
There will only be creeps. It's sad, but that's the way it is. It's better to teach girls and boys how to be safe than teach them they live in a utopia where everybody is nice and bad things don't happen.
Good luck with that
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
So, men seeking a mate is bad behavior? What is wrong with asking for a number. The title implies that this is a problem only with creepy guys who won't understand 'No', but the text says nothing about actually saying 'no'. And seriously, how often do women get "gutted" over saying no? Seriously, are women afraid of being murdered over stuff like this? They need to stop watching so many movies. (I understand that there might be a specific situation in which there might be some fear involved..late night and no one around...but usually that's not the case.) Say, "No, sorry." You are NOT REQUIRED to give a reason, but there is no need to be rude right off the bat. If they don't take 'no' for an answer, say "I said 'no'." And then don't talk to them any more. Completely ignore them.
My dad is in forensics. Do you REALLY want to know how many women (CIS and Trans) get gutted? There is a list that is read in November of people killed. I could send that to you, if you like.
Women get attacked for saying no all the time. It might be nice to pretend that it's only in movies but that just isn't the truth. This is just the most recent one that I heard of: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.latimes.com/local/lanow/la-me-baby-shot-fresno-party-20190624-story.html%3foutputType=amp
Or just read JP's comment below
Tell the guy you had 5 kids in 5 years and all are under the age of 6. All guys run from that. Enjoy your evening
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Not if they just want to fuck.