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189
“Why Are You Being Like This”: Woman Gives Husband An Ultimatum To Start A Family
Politics in the United States have been tumultuous for years, pushing many people to pack their bags and find greener pastures elsewhere. Given the unfavorable views of recently elected President Donald Trump, this trend may continue through his second term in office.
The author of this story is in a similar position in that she refuses to have children in the US. She then gave her husband an ultimatum: either leave the country, go child-free, or divorce. The man seemed offended by the proposal and questioned her motives.
The woman was at a loss for words and turned to the internet for answers and clarity. Scroll down to read the entire text.
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Many American citizens feel uneasy about the country’s current political climate
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
A woman refuses to have children in the US and told her husband about it
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
She then gave him an ultimatum, which he didn’t appreciate
Image credits: ThrowRAFeeltogd
Donald Trump’s presidency drove many people away in 2016 and is doing so again in 2024
The story’s author is part of the demographic of Americans who want to leave the country after Donald Trump’s recent election win. A 64-year-old Chicago-based lawyer named David told Fortune about his plans to move to Portugal.
The man, who requested anonymity, disclosed his lingering fears of harassment, along with concerns of a toxic political climate. As he told the publication, he had been scouting for a home since April with a $500,000 budget.
“This country of mine has become intolerant,” he said, while also stating he had made peace with the fact that he “could be shot dead at any moment” in the US. The threat of gun violence was one of David’s many reasons to move 4,500 miles across the Atlantic.
Trump’s first term in 2016 forced many Americans to move to Canada. A 2020 report by CTV News revealed that more than 6,800 people attempted to apply for permanent residency in the country in 2015. The following year, the number grew to 7,700, jumping again in 2017 to more than 9,000.
Canada is still a top choice among US citizens planning to flee the country to avoid Trump’s second term in office. According to a report by NDTV World, Google searches for “move to Canada” spiked by 1,270% within 24 hours after the East Coast finalized the polls on Tuesday. New Zealand and Australia are also top choices.
The apprehension and concerns of many people like the author are understandable. Feeling unsafe in your own country must be unsettling, and it likely pushed her to give the strict ultimatum.
Reframing the potential sacrifices can help couples power through and finalize a significant life decision
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author has felt uneasy about living in the US for the past three years, which means she has been carrying quite a heavy burden for some time now. As a spouse, the husband should at least hear her out.
Experts advise against individualism in discussions about such significant decisions. In an interview with GQ, psychology professor Dr. Kelly Campbell encourages people to ask what’s best for the relationship instead of what favors the individual.
“Stay on each other’s team,” she emphasized.
Couples therapist Irina Firstein, LCSW, echoed a similar sentiment. In the same GQ interview, she advised the person compromising to reframe their thoughts to avoid resentment.
“Feel good that you are the strong one in the relationship because you can tolerate better than the other person not having your way,” she said.
It may benefit the couple to have a lengthy conversation if necessary. They should weigh the pros and cons and see what works best for the situation. If it comes down to a divorce, they aren’t compatible.
What do you think, readers? How should the couple handle their situation?
Some commenters sided with the author and offered her some advice
Others accused her of “being overly dramatic” and chided her for “wanting to ruin her marriage over a president”
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What do you think ?
Kaedyn Walsh 1 year ago (edited)
I bet every negative reply she got was from.... i'll give you 3 guesses and the first two don't count). But yeah, I don't blame her at all. If I had the means, I'd move to New Zealand or Iceland or Scotland or Switzerland or Sweden or ... since I'm getting tired of people and need a severe people break, maybe move temporarily to Svalbard Island. Polar bears would be less threatening and deadly than those terrifying evangelical extremists that Trump's moved and is moving in all formats of the government. (Did I say Trump? I meant 'the malignant Cancer'. He was a growing tumor during the past 8 years and he's finally metastasized.) They want to not just do a complete abortion ban Countrywide, but also have been and are clucking about banning all contraception. Watch them ban IVF also. "You don't want to birth a baby? we'll force you to" "You desperately want a baby but can't conceive naturally and want IVF? We're banning that, sorry not sorry." Repulsive.
Parmeisan 1 year ago
Uh oh, "man vs bear" again but this time it's "Trumper vs polar bear". ;)
Load More Replies...
Secret Squirrel 1 year ago
Why anyone with other options would raise children in a place where they have active shooter drills is beyond me.
Mike F 1 year ago
Quoting a former coworker, get out while you can. I'm too old to make that move otherwise I would in a heartbeat. The next few years are going to be very difficult for a whole lot of people, but more so for a woman. So many people so filled with hate that feel like this is the best alternative.
Kaedyn Walsh 1 year ago
The ONLY thing that will make me feel pure, total schadenfreude is the fact that the great great majority who voted for Trump (basically women, latinos, poc, elderly & most caucasian men) WEILL be regretting what they've done. They've voted against their own interests and it's going to bite them hard. "I never thought the Leopard would eat MY face!" Says the person who voted for the 'Leopards Eating Peoples Faces' Party. I tell ya, the reddit group called LeopardsAteMyFace is going to be my GoTo place most of the next 4 years, if just to laugh at them and talk c**p about how dumb they were. I DO feel bad for the rest of us who didn't vote for the Narcissistic Cancer. Everyone innocent will suffer and i hate it.
Load More Replies...
Kaedyn Walsh 1 year ago (edited)
I bet every negative reply she got was from.... i'll give you 3 guesses and the first two don't count). But yeah, I don't blame her at all. If I had the means, I'd move to New Zealand or Iceland or Scotland or Switzerland or Sweden or ... since I'm getting tired of people and need a severe people break, maybe move temporarily to Svalbard Island. Polar bears would be less threatening and deadly than those terrifying evangelical extremists that Trump's moved and is moving in all formats of the government. (Did I say Trump? I meant 'the malignant Cancer'. He was a growing tumor during the past 8 years and he's finally metastasized.) They want to not just do a complete abortion ban Countrywide, but also have been and are clucking about banning all contraception. Watch them ban IVF also. "You don't want to birth a baby? we'll force you to" "You desperately want a baby but can't conceive naturally and want IVF? We're banning that, sorry not sorry." Repulsive.
Parmeisan 1 year ago
Uh oh, "man vs bear" again but this time it's "Trumper vs polar bear". ;)
Load More Replies... Secret Squirrel 1 year ago
Why anyone with other options would raise children in a place where they have active shooter drills is beyond me.
Mike F 1 year ago
Quoting a former coworker, get out while you can. I'm too old to make that move otherwise I would in a heartbeat. The next few years are going to be very difficult for a whole lot of people, but more so for a woman. So many people so filled with hate that feel like this is the best alternative.
Kaedyn Walsh 1 year ago
The ONLY thing that will make me feel pure, total schadenfreude is the fact that the great great majority who voted for Trump (basically women, latinos, poc, elderly & most caucasian men) WEILL be regretting what they've done. They've voted against their own interests and it's going to bite them hard. "I never thought the Leopard would eat MY face!" Says the person who voted for the 'Leopards Eating Peoples Faces' Party. I tell ya, the reddit group called LeopardsAteMyFace is going to be my GoTo place most of the next 4 years, if just to laugh at them and talk c**p about how dumb they were. I DO feel bad for the rest of us who didn't vote for the Narcissistic Cancer. Everyone innocent will suffer and i hate it.
Load More Replies...
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