"I Didn't Try To Hide My Scar": Insecure Bride Expected Sisters To "Let Themselves Go" As To Not Upstage Her

Most people would happily show up for their siblings, no questions asked. If they need support on their best or worst day, they should always be able to rely on their brothers or sisters to be there with a bouquet of flowers or a pint of ice cream. 

But when one woman showed up at her sister’s wedding expecting a wholesome day, she couldn’t believe that she was accused of trying to upstage the bride. Below, you’ll find the full story that was shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left. 

This woman was excited to celebrate her sister’s wedding

Image credits: Kateryna Hliznitsova / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

But when she showed up, she was accused of trying to upstage the bride

Image credits: Kateryna Hliznitsova / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Juli Kosolapova / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Image credits: SkelDry / freepik (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Anon

It’s not always easy for siblings to stay close in adulthood

There’s something so special about the bond between siblings. You may have grown up physically fighting with your brothers and sisters, but now that you’re adults, you might consider them your best friends. Siblings have countless stories about shared experiences, and they know each other better than almost anyone else on the planet. So when one is planning a wedding, they’ll probably want their brothers and sisters involved in the big day too.

Many brides choose to make their sister their maid-of-honor or include their siblings as bridesmaids, groomsmen, or the flower girl or ring bearer if they’re young enough. But wedding planner Jamie Chang told The Knot that the happy couple isn’t obligated to include their siblings in their wedding party.

“While it can sometimes feel like you should include your siblings in your wedding party, it is definitely not a requirement,” Chang shared. “[It] is a choice based on your relationship with your siblings and if they are who you want by your side.” 

The Institute for Family Studies reports that nearly eight in 10 American adults who grew up with siblings say they had a very close or somewhat close relationship with their brothers and sisters while growing up. As adults, however, only 69% say they are very or completely satisfied with the relationships they have with their siblings.

Psychotherapist Terri Cole notes that many factors can negatively impact relationships between adult siblings, such as inheritance drama, birth order blues, parental favoritism, issues taking care of aging parents, success disparities, jealousy, and whether or not the siblings start families of their own.

Twins can have a particularly difficult time trying not to compare themselves

Sibling rivalries can also create conflicts, especially between siblings of the same gender. A 2020 survey of adults in the UK found that more than half feel like they’re still in competition with their siblings. And it can be even more difficult for twins to avoid this pressure.

Twin expert and psychologist Joan A. Friedman, PhD, has found throughout her research that twins, particularly identical twins, tend to harbor more resentment for one another as they get older. 

“They have worked diligently to establish a balanced and harmonious relationship over the course of their lives. They have both invested in this balance out of a need and wish to regulate competition and comparison. As their lives diverge, it becomes much more difficult to maintain a sense of equality and sameness,” Friedman explains.

The expert also says that twins are often robbed of the opportunity to experience milestones on their own, which can make them less resilient and independent. And after being compared to one another constantly while growing up, they might continue comparing themselves into adulthood. 

While it can be understandably difficult to stop these comparisons from creeping into your head, it’s important not to let them damage your relationship with your siblings. After all, maintaining strong relationships with your brothers and sisters can help you live a longer, healthier life.

We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think the author was justified in shutting down her sister’s bad attitude? And then, if you’re looking for another Bored Panda piece discussing wedding drama, look no further than right here. 

Many readers took the author’s side, noting that her sister’s behavior was uncalled for

However, some readers thought that everyone involved could have made better choices

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