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“AITA For Telling My Husband He’s Not Allowed In My Daughter’s Nursery?”
Man sitting indoors looking stressed and frustrated, illustrating husband with a real problem in a nursery setting.
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“AITA For Telling My Husband He’s Not Allowed In My Daughter’s Nursery?”

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Rarely does an opportunity to celebrate, relax, or reward ourselves go by without having a couple of drinks. While it might not be an issue when done in moderation, parents in particular should be cautious when consuming alcohol, as being intoxicated around children can put them at risk of danger.

This story could’ve ended in tragedy if not for the mom who noticed her drunk husband holding their baby in time. Concerned about her safety, she kicked her spouse out of the nursery. Later, she started worrying that she might’ve been too harsh, so she turned online for unbiased people’s opinions.

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    Parents should be cautious when drinking alcohol, as an intoxicated state can endanger kids

    Image credits: LightFieldStudios / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

    Unfortunately, these parents weren’t cautious enough, which could’ve ended badly

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    Image credits: LightFieldStudios / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: LeylaCamomile / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: nd3000 / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: No-Block7487

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    Even a few drinks can make it more difficult to provide completely safe care for kids

    Image credits: korrawinj / freepik (not the actual photo)

    While most new parents don’t consume alcohol in a way that puts their children at risk, even a few drinks can make it more difficult to provide completely safe care for kids. Alcohol can impair judgment and reaction time, both of which are crucial when caring for a baby or a young child and evaluating their needs. Liquor can also make adults feel more tired, making it harder to respond to a baby. An intoxicated state may also lead to risky decisions that parents normally wouldn’t make. 

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    So it’s always recommended that at least one sober adult be present who can look after any children. Having a sober presence can keep a baby safe, especially in the event that something unexpected happens. Of course, ensuring there’s a clear-headed person present requires planning ahead of time. One of the parents might decide to skip drinking or ask a loved one or a babysitter to help with childcare. 

    While planning the caregiving situation, parents should also make sure that the baby has a safe space to sleep. It’s advised to never co-sleep when under the influence, which means having the baby in bed on an armchair or a sofa with you, as the risk of accidental suffocation becomes very high. 

    The safest place to sleep for a baby is in their own separate, clear, firm, and flat sleep space, like a cot or Moses basket. The cot or Moses basket should be in the same room as the adult caring for the child. In general, it’s recommended that babies sleep in the same room as their parent or carer for the first six months. 

    “Not drinking alcohol could be a good option for your family, especially during the first few months of your baby’s life,” concluded The Lullaby Trust. 

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    In some cases drinking can have a lasting effect on children

    Image credits: smokewree928 / freepik (not the actual photo)

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    As children get older, being around adults who drink, in some cases, can have a lasting influence on children. Parents are role models to their children, who are constantly watching them, so consuming alcohol even in moderation can send them the message that alcohol is safe for them too. Children can even experience anxiety and trauma if they see parents drinking higher quantities and becoming unpredictable.

    To avoid these negative effects, open communication with children is key, says Dr. Kelli Komro, a professor and social and behavioral epidemiologist at Emory University.

    “It’s important for parents to have good, open communication,” she said. “Talk about what’s going on and the age of appropriateness of alcohol use and why the drinking age set at 21 is to protect young people’s developing brain.”

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    Besides communicating with children about the consequences of alcohol consumption and establishing clear boundaries around it, the most important thing parents can do is model good behavior. 

    “Parents have to remember whatever they do is what their children will mimic,” said George F. Koob, director of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. “If they start drinking and misusing alcohol, getting tipsy in front of the kids, that sets up a pattern that they’re going to emulate.”

    All adults are advised to drink no more than 14 units of alcohol per week—something that every responsible grown-up should be aware of. “If you’re worried about your drinking or thinking about cutting down, your health visitor, family nurse or GP can support you,” concluded the Lullaby Trust.

    The mom provided more information in the comments

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    The majority sympathized with the mom, saying she did what she had to do to protect her baby

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    While some thought she was at fault in this situation

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    Image credits: drazenphoto / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Later, the mom shared an update

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    Image credits: gpointstudio / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: monkeybusiness / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: No-Block7487

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    Austeja Zokaitė

    Austeja Zokaitė

    Author, Community member

    Read more »

    Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and in the past, I was a writer at Bored Panda. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. You can check them out below! I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them:)

    Read less »
    Austeja Zokaitė

    Austeja Zokaitė

    Author, Community member

    Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and in the past, I was a writer at Bored Panda. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. You can check them out below! I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them:)

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, Community member

    Read more »

    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    Read less »

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, Community member

    I'm a senior visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    What do you think ?
    Tyranamar Seuss
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are all these idiots who think the baby was "safe" bc the drunk man who was about to pass out was calmly sitting in a chair. He very easily could've dropped that baby. Baby's skulls are soft. They don't handle head trauma well. I'm picturing a bunch of alcoholic men raging at this woman bc she wouldn't let a drunk hold the baby.

    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ffs he was off his face and couldn't stand let alone handle the baby safely. The yta are out of their minds. Dropped babies don't bounce! They are fragile, living beings who rely on us as parents to nurture and love them. A drunken parent isn't capable of that. He could have fallen asleep and slumped on the baby too.

    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Purple_Cat's comment (before the YTA's) is just as ridiculous as any of the YTAs. I'm glad she trusted her gut (esp given they had pre baby safety talks re excess drinking) and stepped in. Without intent he could've hurt that child. And shes also protecting him from having to live with that, for those offended on her husband's behalf.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, the baby is hers as well as theirs, trying to insist on the plural pronoun is ridiculous. Always get my goat when people say "We're pregnant". No, only one of you is pregnant. It's fine to say "we're" having a baby, expecting or whatever else, but equally it's fine to use the singular when referring to the mother.

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    Tyranamar Seuss
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are all these idiots who think the baby was "safe" bc the drunk man who was about to pass out was calmly sitting in a chair. He very easily could've dropped that baby. Baby's skulls are soft. They don't handle head trauma well. I'm picturing a bunch of alcoholic men raging at this woman bc she wouldn't let a drunk hold the baby.

    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ffs he was off his face and couldn't stand let alone handle the baby safely. The yta are out of their minds. Dropped babies don't bounce! They are fragile, living beings who rely on us as parents to nurture and love them. A drunken parent isn't capable of that. He could have fallen asleep and slumped on the baby too.

    Lauren Caswell
    Community Member
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Purple_Cat's comment (before the YTA's) is just as ridiculous as any of the YTAs. I'm glad she trusted her gut (esp given they had pre baby safety talks re excess drinking) and stepped in. Without intent he could've hurt that child. And shes also protecting him from having to live with that, for those offended on her husband's behalf.

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    6 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, the baby is hers as well as theirs, trying to insist on the plural pronoun is ridiculous. Always get my goat when people say "We're pregnant". No, only one of you is pregnant. It's fine to say "we're" having a baby, expecting or whatever else, but equally it's fine to use the singular when referring to the mother.

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