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“When People Ask Why I’m Not In Our Family Pictures, I’m Going To Tell Them The Truth”
Recently, a man turned to the True Off My Chest community to share an incident that left him beyond upset.
“A couple of weeks ago, my wife asked if we could have professional family photos taken,” the Redditor wrote. He said that money was too tight between their daughter’s birthday, a trip to her parents’ for Thanksgiving, and Christmas.
“I asked her if we could wait until after Christmas; she said no,” he recounted. The author’s wife never brought it up, until one of his tires blew out. The Redditor had no choice but to take from the family’s already tight emergency fund, but little did he know there was not much left in there.
RELATED:
A man broke down after finding out that his wife blew their emergency fund saving on a family photoshoot they couldn’t afford
Image credits: Mikhail Nilov (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Steve Holden (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Alexander Dummer (not the actual photo)
Image credits: throwawayaccount5276
And this is what people commented about this whole situation
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What do you think ?
Marcellus II 3 years ago
"Give her the option of counseling or divorce", "Separate your finances now". Yeah, right. If money is that tight, counseling is it ab-so-lu-te-ly unaffordable. And divorce or moving house, so renting an extra place (plus paying deposit)? What pointless noise these give off as 'advice'.
Nitka Tsar 3 years ago
Might be these advisors are from another country where such problems do not exist. It‘s easy to forget other countries are not as fortunate as your own.
Load More Replies...
Chich 3 years ago (edited)
Reminds me of a crewman I had once, The job involved long days at work and he was often on the road. He was looking really down one time and I asked him what was wrong. His wife was regularily spending all the money he was making partying and treating her friends. Their bank account was drained. Didn't want to leave her so I told him to get a sole account that his pay went into and a joint account that had enough money for expenses.
Lorna Lay 2 years ago
Glad you were there to give him good advice. The first year we were married my husband went and bought a truck with a $370/month payment when money was already tight without even talking to me, and like an idiot I let him continue to ruin our finances for another whole year before finally wising up.
Load More Replies... BoredPandaSucks 3 years ago
Anytime someone plays the "I deserve it" card to justify spending money they probably shouldn't, I always want to say "Do you not deserve to have some facsimile of being financially secure?"
Lori w 3 years ago
We do a Christmas photo every year. I put a chair on the couch and use some random objects to hold the camera in place. I press the delay button & run into position next to my family. I spend about $25 on photo cards from Shutterfly. I think family photos are very important but not an emergency. It sounds like she's desperate to hold onto the financial status they used to have & throwing a tantrum. Hope he sticks to his guns, & they can work on defining "emergency" and also maybe not go on trips until their fund is bigger.
The Starsong Princess 3 years ago
They don’t have a shared understanding of financial priorities. He also thinks that he controls the funds and priorities and that she should be asking permission to spend any of it. She doesn’t agree. So she is punishing him by spending money and he wants to punish her by refusing to be in the pictures and publically embarrassing her. There’s a lot of contempt on both sides here. I don’t think this marriage can be saved.
B.Nelson 3 years ago
He mentioned she had been sick. She is out of line and if she really wants photos there are other places to go to get them. However, is it possible she wants photos because she is back to being healthy and the only photos she has is her being sick? Especially if she had some kind of bout with cancer. Looking at old photos like that would bring back the pain of being ill which might be doing something to her psyche. Instead, just look for someone less expensive and show her the options.
MimSorensson 3 years ago
… I also feel that she should have mentioned that, if that was the case. I see a problem right there. “I deserve it” doesn’t quite get such a point across, I’d have to say.
Load More Replies...
Peta Hurley-Hill 3 years ago
The OP said his wife had "got sick" maybe she just wanted a nice family photo together ,either while she still can or now that she has recovered. Life is sadly very short ,but a photo will always be there for the kids to look back on. Copies can also be given to family/friends as a personal xmas keep sake. Maybe she just needs this right now.
Marcellus II 3 years ago
"Give her the option of counseling or divorce", "Separate your finances now". Yeah, right. If money is that tight, counseling is it ab-so-lu-te-ly unaffordable. And divorce or moving house, so renting an extra place (plus paying deposit)? What pointless noise these give off as 'advice'.
Nitka Tsar 3 years ago
Might be these advisors are from another country where such problems do not exist. It‘s easy to forget other countries are not as fortunate as your own.
Load More Replies... Chich 3 years ago (edited)
Reminds me of a crewman I had once, The job involved long days at work and he was often on the road. He was looking really down one time and I asked him what was wrong. His wife was regularily spending all the money he was making partying and treating her friends. Their bank account was drained. Didn't want to leave her so I told him to get a sole account that his pay went into and a joint account that had enough money for expenses.
Lorna Lay 2 years ago
Glad you were there to give him good advice. The first year we were married my husband went and bought a truck with a $370/month payment when money was already tight without even talking to me, and like an idiot I let him continue to ruin our finances for another whole year before finally wising up.
Load More Replies... BoredPandaSucks 3 years ago
Anytime someone plays the "I deserve it" card to justify spending money they probably shouldn't, I always want to say "Do you not deserve to have some facsimile of being financially secure?"
Lori w 3 years ago
We do a Christmas photo every year. I put a chair on the couch and use some random objects to hold the camera in place. I press the delay button & run into position next to my family. I spend about $25 on photo cards from Shutterfly. I think family photos are very important but not an emergency. It sounds like she's desperate to hold onto the financial status they used to have & throwing a tantrum. Hope he sticks to his guns, & they can work on defining "emergency" and also maybe not go on trips until their fund is bigger.
The Starsong Princess 3 years ago
They don’t have a shared understanding of financial priorities. He also thinks that he controls the funds and priorities and that she should be asking permission to spend any of it. She doesn’t agree. So she is punishing him by spending money and he wants to punish her by refusing to be in the pictures and publically embarrassing her. There’s a lot of contempt on both sides here. I don’t think this marriage can be saved.
B.Nelson 3 years ago
He mentioned she had been sick. She is out of line and if she really wants photos there are other places to go to get them. However, is it possible she wants photos because she is back to being healthy and the only photos she has is her being sick? Especially if she had some kind of bout with cancer. Looking at old photos like that would bring back the pain of being ill which might be doing something to her psyche. Instead, just look for someone less expensive and show her the options.
MimSorensson 3 years ago
… I also feel that she should have mentioned that, if that was the case. I see a problem right there. “I deserve it” doesn’t quite get such a point across, I’d have to say.
Load More Replies... Peta Hurley-Hill 3 years ago
The OP said his wife had "got sick" maybe she just wanted a nice family photo together ,either while she still can or now that she has recovered. Life is sadly very short ,but a photo will always be there for the kids to look back on. Copies can also be given to family/friends as a personal xmas keep sake. Maybe she just needs this right now.
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