“It Sounded Very Formal”: Woman Insulted And Hurt By Husband’s Vows

Artificial intelligence is gradually creeping into every aspect of our lives. This summer, UK jewelry makers Queensmith asked customers about using AI in wedding planning. Shockingly, 55% of the respondents said they’ve used it to write their vows and speeches. However, some people prefer wedding vows to come from the heart.

So did this new bride, who, after finding out her husband used ChatGPT for his vows, felt hurt and betrayed. After she asked for opinions online about how to approach the subject with her husband, some commenters offered a different perspective. So, a debate broke out in the comments: is using AI to write your vows really that cold and impersonal, or a saving grace for those who just aren’t good at expressing their feelings?

A husband had a hard time writing his vows, so he turned to ChatGPT for some help

Image credits: Omelnickiy (not the actual photo)

But when his bride found out he copied the AI word for word, she felt like the words didn’t come from him

Image credits: simonapilolla (not the actual photo)

Image credits: miramar0

Writing wedding vows with the help of AI isn’t as taboo as some might think

At their core, wedding vows symbolize how much partners love and cherish each other. To some people, expressing their feelings comes as naturally as water flows to a river. To others, it’s a dreaded Sisyphean task: how do you put all your feelings and promise a lifetime of commitment in just a few sentences?

Twenty-seven percent of Americans interact with AI constantly or several times a day, and 30% do it about once a day or several times a week. Some of you have probably used it to generate a work email, an apology letter to an old friend or family member, or an ad for your upcoming garage sale. Forty-one percent of Americans, for example, have used AI to craft a breakup message.

But is having AI write your wedding vows going too far? That’s probably for each person to decide. But it’s easy to understand why some couples would turn to artificial intelligence to write their vows.

As Daniela VillaRamos, wedding officiant and co-founder of Once Upon a Vow, explained to The Knot, weddings come with pressure for perfection. “It makes sense that many non-writers feel nervous that they won’t get the sentiment quite right,” she said. “Saying the ‘perfect’ Instagrammable thing during a meaningful moment has led countless couples to heavily rely on AI.”

And newlyweds-to-be don’t shy away from using generative AI to get some help. The Knot has already published its 2026 trend report, and one of the biggest surprises may be that couples are pretty keen on the idea of asking AI for help in planning their wedding. UK-based wedding and vow renewal celebrant Eleanor Willock told Cosmopolitan that around 30% of her customers’ vows involved AI.

Image credits: Tim Witzdam (not the actual photo)

AI use for wedding vows also comes with proper etiquette

Okay, so let’s say that using AI to craft your vows is not as distasteful and evil as some might argue. There is still a proper way to do it, with most experts and people who have done it saying that brides and grooms should use AI as a co-writer instead of just copying its text word for word.

Founder and CEO of the wedding writing tool, Provenance, Steven Greitzer, for example, told The Knot that AI shouldn’t be a wedding vow ghostwriter. “We always tell couples to think of AI as a cocreator, not a ghostwriter,” he said. “The best AI tools don’t replace your voice, they help you find it. With the right guidance, it becomes a tool that supports vulnerability rather than dilute it.”

Some couples don’t use ChatGPT and turn to other programs tailored for crafting wedding vows. A couple from Denver, Molly Price and Erik Sorensen, told Business Insider in 2023 how they used the wedding platform’s Joy “Writer’s Block Assistant.”

It allowed them to put in more personal details and asked questions like “What do you love most about your partner?” They could even choose the vibe they wanted to go for: romantic, pessimistic, or even Shakespearean. “Essentially, to me, coming up with a speech felt like having a big research paper, so it definitely took the stress away from that,” Price told Insider.

But what do you think, Pandas? Is asking ChatGPT to write your vows for you impersonal and cold? Or is it a good option for those who find it hard to express their feelings through words? There probably is no right answer, but we’re curious to hear your opinions!

Image credits: Levart_Photographer (not the actual photo)

The wife didn’t want to hold a grudge but still felt hurt: “This kind of thing means a lot to me so it’s just upsetting”

Reactions to her story were mixed: some thought AI vows were impersonal and superficial; others saw it as a lifeline for people who aren’t good with words

Later, the couple talked openly, and the wife decided that “life is too short to have resentment about these kinds of things”

Image credits: miramar0

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