30 Women Joined This Thread To List The Unexpected Side Effects That Came After Giving Birth

I think men who are about to become fathers should, obligatorily, attend a few lectures on what happens to the female body before and after birth. Ideally they should want to know about this themselves, but my general impression is that men often have no clue...whatsoever.

I recently learnt of something to help a bit here. Nesting party. Help mom prepare her house for the arrival by cleaning, setting up the nursery, doing odd jobs around the home, possibly cooking meals for the freezer. Much nicer than a baby shower and the one friend I did this for was so grateful for the help and getting to some chores she had been unable to do. For another friend a bunch of us drew up a schedule and ensured the new parents had dinner sorted every night for 2 weeks after the baby was born and again when the father was in a minor accident a few months after that. A little caring for everyone goes a long way.

We're looking at you, crappy insurance companies. One night is the hospital post birth is not enough.

yes!!!!!

I have suffered from anxiety with severe insomnia since I gave birth in 1989. Just recently had a doctor tell me that this is not uncommon. So to possible depression, psychosis, and anxiety I will now add anger. Hope it resolves for you.

It's not just the child, nursery/school/the doctors etc all treat me as the default parent, even after I've asked them not to.

Even in perfect situations the emptiness you feel is real. You belly is a mess, your body is so strange, and you're alone. No baby kicking. My son was with me and I still felt empty and lonely. (Effing hormones).

You know those fluffy jiggly pancakes they do in Japan? That's what my bubbies look like when I lay on my side now 😆

This. TV especially depicts giving birth as a situation where you’re overwhelmed with joy and at peace with yourself and the universe and just absolutely overflowing with happiness. In reality, this is true for some mothers, but for many it’s not. And that is fine. It’s normal. You‘ve just spent hours in pain, are exhausted, your hormones are all over the place, and you just got handed some tiny human that you have no history with. Relationships need to grow, and that applies to your relationship with your baby as well. I don’t think I felt a true connection with mine until she smiled at me for the first time. Until then it was more a sense of responsibility. (Be careful though if you actually harbour negative feelings towards your newborn. PPD is nothing to be ashamed of, but something that needs to be addressed.)

Oh. I've totally forgotten about this issue. Thanks for reminding me 🤣🥴😆

It makes me so sad for this woman that she feels doomed to, "have a smaller life for the remainder of your days.".

Lactose intolerant here...

Hearing any baby/child cry is much worse now, my heart starts pounding if a baby cries on TV.

Then when your children grow up and you're not defined as a mother as much, you don't know who you are anymore.

As soon as you become a parent you see accidents waiting to happen everywhere.

I don't know if it was because I was carrying so much extra weight during pregnancy and after, carrying the baby, the car seat, the diaper bag..or if it was just because I had a bad back. but yes that seems to happen.

Many of these are not how evolution designed women's bodies but the result of terrible care during and after labour.

5 years after c-section I still have pain sometimes. Like other wounds that can hurt from time to time the ones from c section hurt too. (And they run deep.)

Pelvic floor physical therapy is awesome! It should be routine postpartum care. Also even women who give birth by C-section are not immune, a fact that I was very frustrated to be lied to about. The pregnancy itself stresses pelvic floor muscles, plus the pelvic floor is attached to your abdominal muscles. You know the ones that get totally f-ed when they slice you open and pull a baby through your abdominal wall.

And when you finally end up in the ER in agony toting your newborn with you all the medical professionals will say, " Ah, yes. Postpartum mother with gallstones, super common. Not surprising at all. Happens all the time ". So why the *****, did nobody think to warm me to be on the lookout for this! I've been suffering for weeks with no idea what the problem might be! I may still be a little bitter. Having gallbladder surgery while still recovering from a C-section wasn't great

It doesn't go away...... 14 years later and I can smell wayyyyyyyyyyyyy tooo much

Wait what!?

In the UK dental treatment is free for pregnant women and for a year after birth.

Epidural headache can be spinal fluid leaking (ask me how I know that), if laying down helps relieving the pain, go asap to emergency room.

If you mean pads for the bleeding for a few days, they should have told you. If you mean nappies to catch pee and poo, then that isn't normal and shouldn't happen.

I can pinpoint the exact moment any sense of modestly flew out the window. I was completely naked, sitting on a toilet and a strange man walking into my room. All I had to say was, "Oh good, you must be the anesthesiologist.".

I was diagnosed with bipolar depression after giving birth

To whomever needs to read this right now: hold on, you're doing great, life will become easier in a few weeks, you're not alone, there are many places where you can safely talk or ask questions. (In France there are PMI- protection maternelle et infantile, they have nurses that can come to your home and give you advice or just talk with you, they also teach how to do babywearing, baby massages...).

Me too...

Yes this

My mother had such bad PPD that she tried to run in front of a bus. She had to be hospitalized and as it was over half a century ago, their remedy was shock treatment. Which worked, but frakked up her short term memory. After that she would make sure not to forget stuff by writing everything down. We had a note on the wall and I'd write down what time I was returning from work so she wouldn't worry.

Depression or other?

Yes, Girl!

Why are you concerned about them taking cord blood? If your blood group is negative, they’ll be taking it to check your baby’s blood group. They may also be taking blood gases, checking the baby’s lactate, blood pH etc - signs of fetal distress or wellbeing. There are other reasons, none of them sinister. If you were concerned, why didn’t you just ask?