“Their Responsibility”: Parent Flat Out Denies School’s Inane Request Involving Twin Sons
Life can be interesting if you have a twin sibling. Apart from being able to prank people by confusing them, there’s a special bond between two people who were born a mere minutes apart.
Life can also be complicated if you have a twin sibling. You may run into issues as these two boys did with their school’s medical officer, who had trouble telling them apart.
This moment of confusion urged the school official to make an absurd request to one of the boys’ parents, a conversation that didn’t end well.
Having a twin sibling has its upsides and downsides
Image credits: MaplesImages (not the actual photo)
For these two boys, the problem began with their school’s medical officer
Image credits: drazenphoto (not the actual photo)
Image source: Top-Relationship359
People with twin siblings often deal with an identity crisis
Like most people with a twin sibling, the two boys in the story likely struggled with their fair share of identity issues. According to educational consultant Dr. Barbara Klein, this is because identity development among twin children is already riddled with critical issues.
“Closeness breeds companionship, love, and struggles about who is who and what belongs to which one,” Dr. Klein wrote, adding that single children rarely wonder about “What belongs to me and what to you?”
Dr. Klein’s study has extensively focused on the development of twin identities. In another article, she listed the common hardships of being a twin, which included being compared to one another, even by strangers.
Dr. Klein adds that such comparisons often create chaos, which people without twin siblings may find “ridiculous.”
“Depending on who is evaluating the pair, these obnoxious questions/comments cause competition and sadness for the less confident twin,” she added.
It was unprofessional of the school’s medical officer to try to pass off her obligations to the boys’ parent. Worse, her comments about having the two become “easy to distinguish” were likewise rude and likely reinforced any identity crisis the children may already have been dealing with.
The author’s reaction would be the same as any other person’s in the same situation. They were correct in saying that it was the school’s responsibility to have the right child.
Most commenters sided with the boys’ parent
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What precisely did they expect mom to do, dye one blue with Rit?
I have heard of parents painting the nails of each twin differently, but that is for babies, not 11 year olds.
Load More Replies...Teachers don't have a hard enough time? Kids will mess teachers around and where medicine is the topic you do not mess around.
That’s why it’s on the school to ensure they are administering medication to the right child.
Load More Replies...I was fully expecting I’d say it was a reasonable request based on the title. They’re twins and it’s about ensuring they get the right meds but it’s not like one is taking a serious prescription d**g and the other isn’t. Above all, they aren’t identical twins. Lots of siblings look similar. PLUS they’re required to wear uniforms, not a lot of room for the parents to make an obvious differentiation. The school is forcing them to look alike with identical clothing. If not for that, it would be reasonable to say “oh, Tim has red shoes and Bob prefers blue” or whatever unique trait they adopted as a matter of personal preference.
The medical officer can write to parents without involving any other school staff, this is not a fault of the school, just one individual. The best course of action is to forward the communication to the children's form teacher and head of year (or whoever is responsible for pastoral care) and ask for clarity. This avoids any chance of parents seeming difficult. As it is highly likely the 'school' had no idea this was an issue (otherwise the message would have come from a senior teacher) they will solve it themselves. I once had 2 boys with the same name (no relation) and similar looks both need daily medication. The medical officer asked if they could be given a card and checked they were capable of also giving an address so she could be absolutely sure of no mistakes.
Definitely school's responsibility! I have taught multiple sets of twins and in the beginning relied on noticing they have different shoes or whatever, but by midyear you can tell which is which. Plus, these are 11 year olds, not 3-4year olds like I taught. They will know what medication they need to take and should be considered responsible enough to tell the truth about it, otherwise it's on them, not the school if anything goes wrong. If this isn't considered enough, they should be able to show their school ID (if they use them) as proof of ID. Duty of care laws would consider this an appropriate limit for responsibility.
If it were me, I'd get my boys involved in a prank on the school. I like the idea of dyeing one blue. I'd do the other one red or green. Couple packets of powdered drink mix in the bath ought to work. And when the head teacher complains about my boys being a distraction, I'd feign innocence and reply “but the medical officer said to do something….”
I would ask, what would be your suggestion school? I think my kids know which medications are theirs. They clearly aren't identical. We had twins in my class back in the day. The mom refused to dress them the way the school wanted them. They just asked which was S and which was J. J had a deeper musky voice. So had a scar on the chin.
What precisely did they expect mom to do, dye one blue with Rit?
I have heard of parents painting the nails of each twin differently, but that is for babies, not 11 year olds.
Load More Replies...Teachers don't have a hard enough time? Kids will mess teachers around and where medicine is the topic you do not mess around.
That’s why it’s on the school to ensure they are administering medication to the right child.
Load More Replies...I was fully expecting I’d say it was a reasonable request based on the title. They’re twins and it’s about ensuring they get the right meds but it’s not like one is taking a serious prescription d**g and the other isn’t. Above all, they aren’t identical twins. Lots of siblings look similar. PLUS they’re required to wear uniforms, not a lot of room for the parents to make an obvious differentiation. The school is forcing them to look alike with identical clothing. If not for that, it would be reasonable to say “oh, Tim has red shoes and Bob prefers blue” or whatever unique trait they adopted as a matter of personal preference.
The medical officer can write to parents without involving any other school staff, this is not a fault of the school, just one individual. The best course of action is to forward the communication to the children's form teacher and head of year (or whoever is responsible for pastoral care) and ask for clarity. This avoids any chance of parents seeming difficult. As it is highly likely the 'school' had no idea this was an issue (otherwise the message would have come from a senior teacher) they will solve it themselves. I once had 2 boys with the same name (no relation) and similar looks both need daily medication. The medical officer asked if they could be given a card and checked they were capable of also giving an address so she could be absolutely sure of no mistakes.
Definitely school's responsibility! I have taught multiple sets of twins and in the beginning relied on noticing they have different shoes or whatever, but by midyear you can tell which is which. Plus, these are 11 year olds, not 3-4year olds like I taught. They will know what medication they need to take and should be considered responsible enough to tell the truth about it, otherwise it's on them, not the school if anything goes wrong. If this isn't considered enough, they should be able to show their school ID (if they use them) as proof of ID. Duty of care laws would consider this an appropriate limit for responsibility.
If it were me, I'd get my boys involved in a prank on the school. I like the idea of dyeing one blue. I'd do the other one red or green. Couple packets of powdered drink mix in the bath ought to work. And when the head teacher complains about my boys being a distraction, I'd feign innocence and reply “but the medical officer said to do something….”
I would ask, what would be your suggestion school? I think my kids know which medications are theirs. They clearly aren't identical. We had twins in my class back in the day. The mom refused to dress them the way the school wanted them. They just asked which was S and which was J. J had a deeper musky voice. So had a scar on the chin.





































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