Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
Woman Gets Suspicious And Texts Husband’s Best Friend Pretending To Be Him, She Falls Right Into Her Trap
Intuition is an interesting thing. You can try to ignore your gut telling you that something is off, but completely disregarding its warnings is often impossible.
So when Reddit user -Calm-Palpitation- overheard her husband’s female best friend bragging to other people that she had him wrapped around her finger, the woman couldn’t shake the feeling that it was more than just a bitter ego trip.
And, as she explained in her post on the subreddit ‘AITAH,’ there was.
RELATED:
A wedding is supposed to bring the couple a happily ever after
Image credits: Leonardo Miranda / unsplash (not the actual photo)
But instead of looking to the future with her partner, this woman began digging into his past
Image credits: shotprime / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Miquel Parera / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: -Calm-Palpitation-
Snooping through your partner’s phone is quite common
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)
According to a survey of over 13,000 Americans by Avast, an antivirus software company, 1 in 4 women and 1 in 5 men admit to secretly checking their partner’s phone.
The survey found that while the majority of women do that because they are just nosy, a quarter of married women, just like the author of this post, suspect their spouse is cheating on them and want to find evidence.
“It is an invasion of privacy and property,” therapist Shannon Chavez said. “To check a phone without consent shows that there is a communication breakdown. Looking for something on your partner’s phone without permission immediately breaks trust to fulfill your own needs. It leads to suspicions and assumptions that trigger insecurities and upset.”
However, according to the aforementioned research, seven out of ten women who turn to their partner’s device to find proof their partner is deceiving them have found it.
Another survey of 1,000 Americans between the ages of fifteen and fifty-five regarding relationships, phones, and trust found that 48% of women and 31% of men think snooping is fine, and that 68% of people who did it do not regret their decision.
But Chavez thinks “the problem is that checking a partner’s phone has become easier than being vulnerable and sharing how you are feeling and why you feel compelled to check the phone.”
Image credits: Chris Yang / unsplash (not the actual photo)
As the woman’s story went viral, people suggested all sorts of avenues she could take
Eventually, she did find a way to investigate her husband further
Poll Question
Total votes ·
Thanks! Check out the results:
Total votes ·
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
What do you think ?
Vanessa Steis 1 month ago
Update: Hi! This is my update: he is cheating. I went through his deleted messages but it was empty so he has been deleting the deleted messages as well. I don’t know if there’s further steps to find them? I don’t know. I sent her “wyd” because this is how he texts when he is bored. She said she was in bed I said I (he) was in bed too watching succession. She asked if I was sleeping. Then it didn’t take long before she started sexting. In a way that made it obvious that they’ve done it multiple times. I ended it quickly because honestly I felt nauseous. I didn’t want to sext her. I sent myself all the evidence. Tomorrow I will be moving back to my parents place and start the divorce. I will not tell him why
Minh Tran 1 month ago
Once you've reached the point of feeling the need to "snoop" and all the emotions tied to it, the relationship is at its end. Either you snoop and confirm your suspicion and the relationship is over, or you snoop and find nothing, turning you into the red-flag,obsessed, member of this now toxic relationship, and it's over. My wife is always free to look through my phone, we are 2 separate individuals who share a strong love for one another. This means there is always trust and it must work both ways equally. The moment you recognize there is an imbalance of trust, the relationship will fail. Unfortunately it requires that both of you are adults capable of being genuine about who you are
Israel Martinez 4 weeks ago
This only works when both are behaving in a manner consistent with being trustworthy and not showing any signs of duplicity ... guiltless behavior need not be suspected ...
Load More Replies...
GalPalAl 1 month ago
I see so many stories like this one every day. Dating s***s and people don't really seem serious about meeting a partner anyways, so what is the appeal of getting married? I have sworn off too many people who morphed into someone I don't recognize as a friend anymore. Plenty of people in the world still seem to find someone willing to sleep with them. And how often have I seen this in other media and when you see the cheater in question, you can't imagine what other people see in this person they all want. I guess I am doing it wrong since I choose not to accept this as normal or acceptable behavior
JB 1 month ago (edited)
Expert comment: Chavez thinks “the problem is that checking a partner’s phone has become easier than being vulnerable and sharing how you are feeling and why you feel compelled to check the phone.” No. The problem is cheaters usually lie. They always have, they always will. OP tried vulnerability and asking, her husband flat lied to her face that there was nothing going on. The only thing that has changed from pre-text phones and internet, is it’s easier to discover that they’re cheating because they either leave a digital trail or the clear absence of a digital trail is suspect. When you know your SO regularly texts someone, yet theirs are the only conversations completely deleted while nearly everyone else they communicate with the texts are still there, you have reasonable cause for concern. We’re being groomed by society and media to consider looking at our partner’s devices as a heinous invasion of privacy. That the mere fear your person has someone on the side makes you the bad actor, someone not worthy of being in a relationship because you don’t trust the other person blindly. The research showed 7:10 women who checked their partner’s phone found clear evidence of cheating. That ratio is probably similar across all genders. Think about that, 70% of the respondents who were worried their partner was cheating found evidence. And the other 30% aren’t exonerated. Some of them are simply better at covering their tracks. Life has taught me that blind trust leads to blindsided.
Kate Johnson 1 month ago
I'd ghost him too. Just let him come home one day and you're gone, leaving he divorce paperwork.
Binky Melnik 1 month ago
So your point is … what? I don’t get it. If your point is to announce you’ve seen this post or others like it before (we all have; it’s a common topic of discussion), what have you accomplished? How do you feel we’ve benefited from your announcement? If it’s to complain you’ve read to many “phone snooping” messages, what have you accomplished? How do you feel we’ve benefited from your announcement? (1. So have we; what does your complaining accomplish? You’ve not complained to the source, who could do something about it if they feel compelled to, but we’re in the same boat as you) 2. We’ve not only not benefited, but are tired of reading complaints about which were powerless to help.) If your complaint was merely to let off steam, I hope you feel better as we’re merely annoyed at having to read yet another toothless, flaccid “I’m mad as hell, and I won’t take it anymore!” post. If it’s none of these, I’m at a total loss.
Load More Replies... 
Vanessa Steis 1 month ago
Update: Hi! This is my update: he is cheating. I went through his deleted messages but it was empty so he has been deleting the deleted messages as well. I don’t know if there’s further steps to find them? I don’t know. I sent her “wyd” because this is how he texts when he is bored. She said she was in bed I said I (he) was in bed too watching succession. She asked if I was sleeping. Then it didn’t take long before she started sexting. In a way that made it obvious that they’ve done it multiple times. I ended it quickly because honestly I felt nauseous. I didn’t want to sext her. I sent myself all the evidence. Tomorrow I will be moving back to my parents place and start the divorce. I will not tell him why
Minh Tran 1 month ago
Once you've reached the point of feeling the need to "snoop" and all the emotions tied to it, the relationship is at its end. Either you snoop and confirm your suspicion and the relationship is over, or you snoop and find nothing, turning you into the red-flag,obsessed, member of this now toxic relationship, and it's over. My wife is always free to look through my phone, we are 2 separate individuals who share a strong love for one another. This means there is always trust and it must work both ways equally. The moment you recognize there is an imbalance of trust, the relationship will fail. Unfortunately it requires that both of you are adults capable of being genuine about who you are
Israel Martinez 4 weeks ago
This only works when both are behaving in a manner consistent with being trustworthy and not showing any signs of duplicity ... guiltless behavior need not be suspected ...
Load More Replies... GalPalAl 1 month ago
I see so many stories like this one every day. Dating s***s and people don't really seem serious about meeting a partner anyways, so what is the appeal of getting married? I have sworn off too many people who morphed into someone I don't recognize as a friend anymore. Plenty of people in the world still seem to find someone willing to sleep with them. And how often have I seen this in other media and when you see the cheater in question, you can't imagine what other people see in this person they all want. I guess I am doing it wrong since I choose not to accept this as normal or acceptable behavior
JB 1 month ago (edited)
Expert comment: Chavez thinks “the problem is that checking a partner’s phone has become easier than being vulnerable and sharing how you are feeling and why you feel compelled to check the phone.” No. The problem is cheaters usually lie. They always have, they always will. OP tried vulnerability and asking, her husband flat lied to her face that there was nothing going on. The only thing that has changed from pre-text phones and internet, is it’s easier to discover that they’re cheating because they either leave a digital trail or the clear absence of a digital trail is suspect. When you know your SO regularly texts someone, yet theirs are the only conversations completely deleted while nearly everyone else they communicate with the texts are still there, you have reasonable cause for concern. We’re being groomed by society and media to consider looking at our partner’s devices as a heinous invasion of privacy. That the mere fear your person has someone on the side makes you the bad actor, someone not worthy of being in a relationship because you don’t trust the other person blindly. The research showed 7:10 women who checked their partner’s phone found clear evidence of cheating. That ratio is probably similar across all genders. Think about that, 70% of the respondents who were worried their partner was cheating found evidence. And the other 30% aren’t exonerated. Some of them are simply better at covering their tracks. Life has taught me that blind trust leads to blindsided.
Kate Johnson 1 month ago
I'd ghost him too. Just let him come home one day and you're gone, leaving he divorce paperwork.
Binky Melnik 1 month ago
So your point is … what? I don’t get it. If your point is to announce you’ve seen this post or others like it before (we all have; it’s a common topic of discussion), what have you accomplished? How do you feel we’ve benefited from your announcement? If it’s to complain you’ve read to many “phone snooping” messages, what have you accomplished? How do you feel we’ve benefited from your announcement? (1. So have we; what does your complaining accomplish? You’ve not complained to the source, who could do something about it if they feel compelled to, but we’re in the same boat as you) 2. We’ve not only not benefited, but are tired of reading complaints about which were powerless to help.) If your complaint was merely to let off steam, I hope you feel better as we’re merely annoyed at having to read yet another toothless, flaccid “I’m mad as hell, and I won’t take it anymore!” post. If it’s none of these, I’m at a total loss.
Load More Replies... You May Like Friend Ruins Woman’s $500 Yixing Teapot Making Tea, Gets Upset When Asked To Buy A New One For $500 “AITAH For Telling My Girlfriend I’m Not Canceling My Plans Last Minute To Do Manual Labor” Guy Devastated After Random Pic In Old Age Home Revealed Mom's 15-Year-Old Shocking Secret
Monika Pašukonytė
Dominyka Proškėnaitė
Monika Pašukonytė
Related on Bored Panda
37
16