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66 Kids With Unfortunate Names That Tell You About Their Parents Everything You Need To Know
The Covid pandemic brought us lots of things... Misery, loneliness, lockdowns, remote work, and a whole bunch of bizarre baby names. Quarantina, Pandemica, Virusandra, Mia Corona, Covidleigh, and Zeneca are among some of the strangest names that no ever child asked for but got anyway.
This ridiculous trend of giving offspring offbeat names seems to have started long before 2020. Some thought Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin had consciously malfunctioned when they called their firstborn Apple in 2004. A few more celebrities jumped on the bandwagon. Then Elon Musk came along and said, "Hold my Tesla," before naming his son X Æ A-12.
We thought we'd heard it all but it seems some parents can't stop. Won't stop. Someone asked, "What’s a name of a child that proves that the parents aren’t serious people?" and we could've sworn the world had lost its marbles. From U-R-H-Y-N-E-Z (proudly pronounced 'Your Highness!'), to Random (who has a younger brother named Extra), it's probably safe to say that more than a few name changes might be happening sometime in the future.
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#1
Naming your daughter Princess just screams “pregnant in high school” to me
What happened to the good old days of Peter, John, Mary And Jane? Sometimes it seems as if some parents are competing for a gold star on the World's Walk of Shameful Names.
The fact that they think their children are going to glamorously glide through life sporting a name like Random, Extra, Pandemica, Bimbo or Rope makes us feel like their baby-naming rights might need to be revoked.
Unconventional, unique and plain ridiculous names can set a child up for a lifetime of teasing, mockery and jokes. Not to mention the administrative chaos that could come from strange spellings or bizarre characters. Official legal documents, passports, birth certificates, and flight tickets can all get lost in translation, so to speak.
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#2
X Æ A-Xii, Exa Dark Sideræl, Techno "Tau" Mechanicus, etc... oh wait these just prove he's a comic book villain.
Fungus John 5 minutes ago (edited)
what a loser. the Tau and the Imperium are bitter enemies, thats like calling a kid Adolf Weinstein.
#3
Renesmee
tom (bat/man) 1 hour ago
yeah, yeah, once we get those grapes out of your mouth we will release you
Some parents go for offbeat names to ensure that their kids stand out and don't just blend into the crowd. Others, it seems, do it simply to be funny. Either way, they clearly don't realize how damaging a bizarre name can potentially be for their offspring.
In 2024, the BBC reported that studies had found that men with uncommon first names were more likely to drop out of school and be lonely later in life. "One study, found that psychiatric patients with more unusual names tended to be more disturbed," added the media outlet.
#4
"Nevaeh" just name her Heaven
#5
I work with a lady named Tappy. Also, a few years ago, I came across a name while working (insurance industry) King Money III. The third!!!! There’s three of these jokers?
#6
I work with a woman named Sunshine. She has two sisters named Rainbow and Delight and one brother named Gerald.
tom (bat/man) 1 hour ago (edited)
Gerald got lucky, maybe by the 4th child his parents learned their lesson.
But a bizarre name doesn't always have to spell disaster. One expert says that being bullied, teased or mocked because of your name can actually lead to better impulse control.
"They actually benefit from that experience by learning to control their emotions or their impulses, which is of course a great skill for success," argues Dalton Conley, a sociologist at New York University and the author of Parentology: Everything You Wanted to Know about the Science of Raising Children.
Conley himself has come under attack for naming his daughter E.... (yes, that's it. That's the full name).
#7
Naming your baby Khalessi (Game of Thrones)
#8
I worked in enrollment and this little boy’s name was Navy Seals Jr. JUNIOR! Two generations of straight foolishness 😂🤣
#9
Kviiilin. Pronounced Kaitlin. Parents used the Roman numerals for 8 in place of the ‘ait’ in the name.
And yes, it’s true.
Conley says he and his wife were in the process of choosing a name for their baby when she was born two months premature.
"We had narrowed down the selections to a bunch of E- names, but we couldn't ultimately decide," he explained. "Then we came up with the idea of, 'Let's just constrain the first degree of freedom. Let's just give her the first letter and then she can decide when she's old enough what it stands for.'"
E, now an adult, rolled with the punches. "I think once you're given a name, you get used to it - it's part of you," she told the BBC.
#10
In the NICU there was a baby next to my son named King. I said oh they’re so going to regret that later.
#11
I worked at a photography studio in college. A couple came in with their sons: Denim, Suede, and
…
Rope.
#12
I have a cousin named "Bimbo". I thought it was just a nickname, but it's his real government name. 😭
TonjaLasagne 1 hour ago
My step-brother’s nickname since he was a child has been B***o but he’s been *Bim* for decades…it s***s when you are the youngest of the tribe! I couldn’t imagine anyone actually giving a child that moniker as their REAL name, though.
If we've learned anything from the names Apple, X Æ A-12, Bimbo or Pandemica, it's that times have certainly changed.
“I think in past generations, parents were much more concerned about their kids’ names fitting in. But in the past 20 years, the focus has been 100% on standing out,” says Laura Wattenberg, founder of the baby-naming site Baby Name Wizard. “Parents are really, really worried about their kids being ordinary.”
#13
Semaj… cause why tf is your named James backwards!?
#14
I know people named their child Covid and Rona. Like whut??????
TheSubmissiveToe 47 minutes ago
Rona is an old name and had nothing to do with the virus. Rona Barrett, anyone? Good lord, I just aged myself.
Wattenberg told Quartz that research has shown that people find familiar, easy-to-pronounce names to be likable and trustworthy. She said that when you hear from a person with a name like Dave or Jen or Mike, “you’re more likely to answer their email, more likely to swipe right on Tinder.”
Yet, more and more parents are throwing caution to the wind, and burning the box when it comes to naming their children. Some believe they're doing their offspring a favor.
“Parents are worried about their kids’ futures and want to carve out shelf space in the marketplace of life,” says Wattenberg. “Some think that standing out with a name will help their kids do that.”
#16
I knew a fantastic girl named True False (like the family surname was False and they decided, with absolute impunity, to foist an actual pun upon their daughter as her government name) and she loathed it. LOATHED it.
#17
I’ve got you all beat. Working as a Peds RN, ER calls for an admission to the floor. Nurse spells out kids name for me. U-r-h-y-n-e-z. Naturally I ask, “how is it pronounced?” She responded mother told her but she can’t remember. Nurse was Filipino, idk if she was just playing and wanted me to hear it for myself. iykyk. So when patient is transferred to floor for admission, I asked mom, “how is your son’s name pronounced?” She replied very matter-of-factly, “Your highness!” Me: “oh, ok” 🫠
#18
I worked in a doctor’s office and had to call a patient into the exam room. Her name was September. I said “You should have been here last week. We had a patient named February.”
She replied that’s my sister. My mother liked calendars. 📅 🥺
Lukas (fuck/transphobes) 57 minutes ago
I had two foster siblings named Summer and Autumn. I also know somebody who chose the name Saturday when he transitioned, cool-a*s name, makes me wish I'd chosen something more creative than just "Lukas" lol
In 2023, the UK’s Office for National Statistics revealed that 64,560 unique names were being registered each year. That's twice as many as in 1999. And this year, the US parenting website and app BabyCenter announced that Juniper, Malachi and Emersyn had made it into the top 100 names for the first time ever.
Interestingly, some adults are opting to change their conventional names in order to be more unique.
#19
An ex neighbor named his children Mercedes and Bently. Poor people
Forrest Hobbs 1 hour ago
Mercedes is a perfectly ordinary Spanish (female) name. Bentley? The cars were named after a Mr Bentley, so - less so, eh?
#20
I went to school with a guy named Random who had a younger brother named extra. Their father was later convicted of counterfeiting and undermining US currency market.
The Guardian reported last year that Rebecca, Thomas, Muhammad and David featured in the top 10 most changed names, swapped out for Liam, Riley, Kayleigh and Remiel. It added that one provider of legal deed polls said that one in six of all applications were from people changing their name to live "more authentically."
Whether you love your name, or hate your name, it's important to remember, in the words of Dr. Seuss: Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!
#22
Precious Shartenay. We think the mom didn’t know how to spell or pronounce Chardonnay.
tom (bat/man) 1 hour ago
The "shartenay" is what happens the next day after several bottles of wine...cant fart with confidence
#23
You guys will not stop laughing once you see the names registered in the Philippines during covid😫 Ex: Covid Bryant, Quarantina/Quinton, Pandemica, Virusandra, Pippa(PPE), Mia Corona, Covidleigh, McCovyd, Dela Ta(Canned goods), Zoom(online meet), Zeneca(vaccine) etc😭😭😭
Forrest Hobbs 1 hour ago
Well. Pippa is a perfectly good shortened version of 'Philippa'. As for the rest? Perhaps someone with an understanding of Philippine culture might be able to explain, 'cos I can't.
#24
I went to school with a girl named Neon Skyy. Her sister was Breezi. Her son was Hero Jupiter Exavion.
#25
As a teacher I’ve seen a lot of weird names, particularly middle names. My top 3 favorite are Looktwice, T-Rex, and Starrr (her first name also had 3 of the same letter in it: Alexxxis).
#26
High school teacher. Had a student one year whose first name was
Baby Girl
I kid you not.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 48 minutes ago
That’s what they call her in the hospital before the parents designate a name.
#27
A'miracle will always be a weird one for me. My mom used to work in the ER and had a rambunctious little girl in the waiting room. Her mother proceeds to yell, "A'miracle, if you don't settle down right now I'm gonna turn you into A'ACCIDENT!".
#28
A church couple named their daughters Dior and Victoria
#30
A friend gave his son the legal middle name of Danger.
#31
This coming up right after a post about a baby named Jaxson. There's Jackson. There's Jaxon. And then there's whatever that is. You cannot tell me it's not pronounced jack-sa-son.
SchadenFreudian Psychology 45 minutes ago
I have a friend whose daughter named her son Jax. I hope when he gets older he insists on being “Jack.”
#36
In elementary school I knew a peanut, mackie and coco. (Macadamia, coconut) 😅
#39
Megatron. But in Thailand, there are kids named iPhone, Facebook, IG, Pony, Lemon Sherbet Ice-Cream, New Orleans etc. Sooo… 🤷🏻♀️
#40
My previous neighbor named her oldest son "Imagine"... but it is pronounced as "E-mah-zhuh-nay"
#42
I knew somebody in school named Abu. His siblings is named Jasmine and Aladdin. I told him his parents funny as hell to name them after the characters 🤣
#45
Here in the Philippines, there’s that kid named “Drink Water”. And no, I’m not kidding.
#47
“Locket Romance”
“Poetry Lucia”
They’re twins, boy/girl, first and middle names, I can’t even with influencers 🤦♀️
#48
I just recently read a head line about a FEDERAL JUDGE named Sparkle! Kind of threw out my argument that I need to name my child something that will be taken seriously in case they choose to run for public office.
#49
Met a set of sisters named ruby, sapphire, and emerald. I dont know if they had more siblings but im really curious now
#50
I knew someone in high school named apple who had a sister named cherry. Craziest revelation of my young life at the time 😂
#59
We had a trio of sisters at my highschool named “brandy” “tequila” and… any guesses? Beer? Wine? Vodka? Champagne?
All wrong, the third was named “America”
#61
In the news here in the Philippines, there were siblings named Macaroni 85 and Spaghetti 88. Not even kidding 😵💫
#64
Worked in registration in PEDS ER and met Lemonjello and Orangello. Pronounced “limahngelo” and “orahngelo”
#66
I know a family that lives in Texas and has 3 sons. Two are named Dallas and Austin. The youngest is Mark.
What do you think ?
olivejuicedrinker (she/her) 55 minutes ago
now i feel lucky abt my name. my full name is long, but fairly normal
olivejuicedrinker (she/her) 55 minutes ago
now i feel lucky abt my name. my full name is long, but fairly normal
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