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16YO Decides To Live With Dad After One Too Many Kids Move Into Mom’s House: “Selfish”
Teen sitting outside looking upset and tired, feeling sick of being a third parent to seven kids at his momu2019s house

16YO Decides To Live With Dad After One Too Many Kids Move Into Mom’s House: “Selfish”

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It’s one thing for a parent to ask their teen to help out with a younger sibling now and again. But when a mom expects their 16-year-old to be a full-time babysitter to her second husband’s 2 kids, his ex’s 3 kids and the teen’s 2 half-siblings (yes, that’s 7 children!), things have reached a whole new level. A netball team-size level.

A 16-year-old says he had enough of being a parent to “a bunch of kids” at his mom’s house, so he moved out and moved in with his dad instead. His mother thinks he’s selfish and cannot understand why he refuses to play happy family with her blended clan. She’s also angry that her son refuses to call her second husband “dad.” Now, the teen feels guilty…

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    He was devastated when his sister passed away, and his parents later got divorced

    Teen sitting alone outside, looking upset and overwhelmed being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

    Instead of giving him space to heal, his mother expects him to jump straight into her new blended family and help raise 7 kids

    Alt text: Teen feeling overwhelmed being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house, expressing frustration and running away.

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    Text explaining a teen overwhelmed with being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Text excerpt about coping with family loss, reflecting a teen’s perspective on being a third parent to seven kids at mom’s house.

    Teen expressing frustration over being treated like a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

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    Teen frustrated with being a third parent to 7 kids at mom’s house shares feelings about family and stepparents.

    Teen overwhelmed by being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house shares struggles and feelings of running away.

    Teen looking frustrated while talking to his mom on a couch, illustrating teen sick of being a third parent at home.

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    Image credits: korrawinj (not the actual photo)

    Alt text: Teen sick of being a third parent at mom’s house, responsible for helping with seven kids and babysitting duties.

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    Text discussing a teen sick of being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house seeking to live with his dad.

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    Teen feeling overwhelmed being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house, struggling with family conflicts.

    Alt text: Teen expressing frustration about being a third parent to seven kids at his mom's house and feeling overwhelmed

    Teen overwhelmed being third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house shares struggle and reason for running away.

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    He later revealed a bit more about his past and his future plans

    Screenshot of an online forum discussing a teen overwhelmed by being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Screenshot of a Reddit conversation about a teen feeling overwhelmed being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Can a child choose which parent to live with after a divorce? Here’s what the law says…

    Some parents believe that their children can legally choose who they live with after a divorce, but experts say this is not the case.

    According to the Custody X Change site, Georgia is actually the only U.S. state that allows a child to decide who takes physical custody of them. And even then, that child must be 14 years or older, and their choice must be approved by a judge.

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    While all states allow judges to consider the preference of a (mature) child in a custody case, 13 don’t require judges to take a mature child’s opinion into account. “Mature” varies from state to state, but generally, 14 years old is the most common.

    California, New Mexico, West Virginia, Indiana, and Utah are among the states that consider children 14 and older sufficiently mature, while Mississippi, Oklahoma, Tennessee, and Texas set the age at 12. In Georgia, children as young as 11 can share their thoughts with the court, and when they reach 14, they’re allowed to choose which parent to live with. That decision can be overruled by a judge in certain circumstances.

    “If you go to court over custody, you need to understand your state’s approach to many topics, including a child’s right to share their opinion,” said Ben Coltrin, Custody X Change co-founder and president. “There’s debate over what’s more important: letting a child have a say or shielding them from parental disputes. How your state and judge view the issue will affect your case.”

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    It’s important to note that many judges will scrutinize a child’s reason for wanting to live with a certain parent.

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    “For example, if a child expresses enthusiasm about playing video games with one parent, a judge may give that very limited consideration,” explains the Cosner Law Group team. “However, if they express concerns because of an unhealthy dynamic with that parent, those concerns can carry more weight.”

    Judges are meant to make their decision based on the best interests of the child.

    The Custody X Change site also warns that if parents decide to go to court over custody arrangements and a judge makes a decision, the child must comply. “This means your son or daughter cannot refuse to see a parent who has been awarded custody or visitation time,” explain the experts.

    Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)

    “She wanted a 3rd parent”: many felt sorry for the teen and gave some advice

    Comment about a teen sick of being a third parent to seven kids at his mom's house, expressing boundaries and grief.

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    Teen overwhelmed by being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house shares feelings of running away.

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    Comment discussing the teen being sick of acting as a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

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    Screenshot of a Reddit comment discussing a teen feeling burdened as a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

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    Comment advising a teen feeling like a third parent to siblings at their mom’s house to set boundaries and seek therapy.

    Screenshot of an online comment discussing a teen feeling burdened as a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Alt text: Teen expresses frustration about being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house and running away.

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    Commenter advising a teen overwhelmed by parenting seven kids at mom’s house and feeling forced to run away.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment advising a teen sick of being a third parent to get child support and protect their credit.

    Comment discussing a teen feeling overwhelmed and not ready to be a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

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    Reddit comment discussing a teen’s frustration with being a third parent to multiple kids at his mom’s house.

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    Screenshot of a forum comment discussing a teen overwhelmed by being a third parent to multiple kids at his mom's house.

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    Teen overwhelmed by being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house, feeling forced into responsibility too soon.

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    Screenshot of online comment stating You are not the parent, related to teen sick of being third parent to 7 kids at mom’s house.

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    Screenshot of a Reddit comment about a teen feeling like a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Screenshot of a Reddit comment by a teen expressing frustration about being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

    Reddit comment discussing a teen's struggle being a third parent to seven kids at his mom’s house.

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

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    Robyn Smith

    Robyn Smith

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Robyn is an award-winning journalist who has produced work for several international media outlets. Made in Africa and exported to the world, she is obsessed with travel and the allure of new places. A lover of words and visuals, Robyn is part of the Bored Panda writing team. This Panda has two bamboo tattoos: A map of Africa & the words "Be Like The Bamboo... Bend Never Break."

    What do you think ?
    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mom needed therapy after losing her daughter and instead chose to collect kids. Not a good move and certainly not OPs responsibility.

    Marypat stewart
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am very sorry for your loss. Losing a sibling is so hard.

    Science Nerd
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I second the recommendation to lock down the OP’s credit. Taking out student loans is somebody else’s name is in the news right now and something like that could hurt in paying for college or trade school.

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mom needed therapy after losing her daughter and instead chose to collect kids. Not a good move and certainly not OPs responsibility.

    Marypat stewart
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am very sorry for your loss. Losing a sibling is so hard.

    Science Nerd
    Community Member
    2 weeks ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I second the recommendation to lock down the OP’s credit. Taking out student loans is somebody else’s name is in the news right now and something like that could hurt in paying for college or trade school.

    Load More Comments
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